Anyone up for some poop burgers?
Japanese scientist Mitsuyuki Ikeda from the Okayama Laboratory certainly doesn't believe in human waste.
He thinks that's perfectly good protein you're sending out to sea, and he's found a way to extract it, mix it with steak sauce and create a fecal feast fit for a king.
And despite the downside of having to add soya to bind it all together, Prof Ikeda thinks there's no reason why we shouldn't all tuck into his turd burgers.
Why would he even think of it, you might ask.
Because Tokyo Sewage asked him to. Tokyo is swimming in sewage mud, it seems, and there's only one way it can save itself and that's eat it.
Prof Ikeda found the mud was loaded with protein due to the high bacteria content. Combine it with reaction enhancer and put it in a magical machine called an "exploder" and artificial steak comes out the other end.
According to Digital Trends, it's 63 percent protein, 25 percent carbohydrates, 3 percent lipids and 9 percent minerals.
It's colored red so you don't know it's poo.
"Initial tests have people saying it even tastes like beef," Digital Trends reports.
Prof Ikeda and his colleagues say it's the perfect solution for reducing waste and emissions from flatulent cows.
Which is understandable, because if someone told you that Whopper you just ate was actually made from yesterday's leftover feces, you'd probably be too traumatized to masticate meat ever again.
Of course, there's a hitch - besides the fact it's made from poo and soya. The cost of producing Prof Ikeda's stinky steaks at the moment is about "10 to 20 times" the price of carving it off a cow.
Leave it to the fast food chains to work out the economics. You can't argue the mass production side of the equation is already sorted...