Fitness + Well-being

Mom's important message to daughter who called her fat

Kids can say hurtful things they don’t mean. But when one woman’s young daughter called her fat, she decided to use it as an opportunity to redefine the term.

Allison Kimmey, an international self-help author and speaker, shared a post on Instagram detailing the conversation she had with her children about using the word fat as an insult.

My daughter called me fat today. She was upset I made them get out of the pool and she told her brother that mama is fat. I told her to meet me upstairs so we could chat. Me: "what did you say about me?" Her: "I said you were fat, mama, im sorry" Me: "let's talk about it. The truth is, I am not fat. No one IS fat. It's not something you can BE. But I do HAVE fat. We ALL have fat. It protects our muscles and our bones and keeps our bodies going by providing us energy. Do you have fat?" Her: "yes! I have some here on my tummy" Me: "that's right! So do I and so does your brother!" Her brother: "I don't have any fat, I'm the skinniest, I just have muscles" Me: "actually everyone, every single person in the world has fat. But each of us has different amounts." Her brother: " oh right! I have some to protect my big muscles! But you have more than me" Me: "Yes, that's true. Some people have a lot, and others don't have very much. But that doesn't mean that one person is better than the other, do you both understand? Both: "yes, mama" Me: "so can you repeat what I said" Them: "yes! I shouldn't say someone is fat because you can't be just fat, but everyone HAS fat and it's okay to have different fat" Me: "exactly right!" Them: "can we go back to the pool now?" Me: no 🤣🤣 __________________ Each moment these topics come up i have to choose how I'm going to handle them. Fat is not a bad word in our house. If I shame my children for saying it then I am proving that it is an insulting word and I continue the stigma that being fat is unworthy, gross, comical and undesirable. Since we don't call people fat as an insult in my household, I have to assume she internalized this idea from somewhere or someone else. Our children are fed ideas from every angle, you have to understand that that WILL happen: at a friends house whose parents have different values, watching a tv show or movie, overhearing someone at school- ideas about body image are already filtering through their minds. It is our job to continue to be the loudest, most accepting, positive and CONSISTENT voice they hear. So that it can rise above the rest. Give me a 🙌🏻 if this resonated w u! Just do you! Xoxo Allie

A post shared by ALLIE 🌸 Just Do You, Babe! (@allisonkimmey) on

“My daughter called me fat today. She was upset I made them get out of the pool and she told her brother that mama is fat,” Kimmey wrote.

After her daughter apologized, Kimmey explained to her children that in her eyes, fat isn’t something a person is but rather something a person has. In fact, everyone has fat, just in different amounts, but that doesn’t define their worth.

OVERWEIGHT MOM LOSES 132 POUNDS, RUNS HALF MARATHON TO INSPIRE DAUGHTER

She goes on to explain how she’s trying to redefine what the word means to her children.

“Each moment these topics come up i have to choose how I'm going to handle them. Fat is not a bad word in our house. If I shame my children for saying it then I am proving that it is an insulting word and I continue the stigma that being fat is unworthy, gross, comical and undesirable,” Kimmey wrote.

Kimmey explains how children are fed ideas about body image from so many different sources, so it’s important as a parent to combat any negative views they might have.

“It is our job to continue to be the loudest, most accepting, positive and CONSISTENT voice they hear. So that it can rise above the rest,” Kimmey wrote.

FOLLOW US ON FACEBOOK FOR MORE FOX LIFESTYLE NEWS

Unfortunately, fat shaming often starts at an incredibly young age. According to a new study out of the Netherlands, researchers found that overweight children are being excluded from friendships, which can increase their risk of loneliness, depression, poor eating habits and illness.