There are a lot more important things going on in the world than the mating habits of Governor Sanford, but we've got to start with him because here's the one thing tonight: Character does matter.

On Wednesday, South Carolina Governor Mark Sanford tearfully admitted he had been unfaithful to his wife, Jenny, for about a year with a woman from Argentina. He apologized. And you know, I'd like to take this chance to apologize as well.

You see, even though I've been saying "throw the bums out," I secretly had this crazy belief that 0.0000002 percent of politicians are actually decent human beings.

Well. I was wrong — completely, totally, utterly, wrong: There are zero.

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I'm so tired of this. Is it really too much to ask that we have one decent person in office? I should have known it when, just a few days earlier on this very program, I asked Senator Jim DeMint if he could vouch for Sanford's character. Here's what he said:

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

BECK: Can you vouch for his character that he is what he seems to be?

SEN. JIM DEMINT, R-S.C.: He always has been up front with me but, you know, who knows? I don't know if we can vouch for each other's character. But he's a good friend of mine and obviously I hope he's OK.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

When one politician won't lie about another politician, you know bad things are about to happen. It's unbelievable; yet another in the long list of dirtbag politicians: Ensign, John "Cheat on My Cancerous Wife" Edwards, Spitzer, Larry "Wide Stance" Craig, Vitter, Foley, McGreevy, Clinton, Condit.

For the love of Pete, they should create a Fidelity Monument in D.C. because apparently it's quite an accomplishment to serve and be faithful.

One decent person — that's all I want —- one! One politician who doesn't hold up morality with one hand while undoing the zipper with the other.

I don't care what you do in your personal life as long as it's not deceitful. How do I trust you if you are lying to your loved ones?

And conservatives, don't give me the "But Glenn, he's good on fiscal policy" argument.

In the '90s, I believed character mattered. I wanted President Clinton out because he lied to the American people and because he was a dirtbag. Governor Sanford, you voted to impeach Clinton and said he should step aside, citing the need for "moral legitimacy."

I wonder, do you still feel the same way today? I know I do.

Stop asking me to trust you — I don't. I've never really trusted politicians, but given the incredible stupidity lately — combined with Governor Sanford's mess — I really, really don't trust politicians.

Let's put morality aside for a minute: Argentina? Couldn't you have picked someone who lived in, say, Charleston? I'm not a philanderer, but I am a thinker: That's the dumbest thing I've ever heard. Didn't you think your wife might catch on to the international phone calls or to the sudden increase in weekend getaways to... Argentina?

I don't know where to begin with the stupidity on this one. Let's start here: These things are all over the place, but I was off Wednesday and Sanford's e-mails are so good:

"You have a particular grace and calm that I adore. You have a level of sophistication that so fitting with your beauty... I could digress and say that you have the ability to give magnificent gentle kisses, or that I love your tan lines, or that I love the curve of your hips, the erotic beauty of you holding yourself (or two magnificent parts of yourself) in the faded glow of the night's light — but hey, that would be going into sexual details... and unlike you, I would never do that."

He even gets it in the last line: Character matters.

It's not a question of who is morally superior or inferior, it's about being a man or woman with common decency and honor.

We have bigger fish to fry. This one's cooked and done.

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