I'll be careful with my wording here, but if someone, hopefully someone familiar, came up to you and whispered in your ear: "Hey, how about some stimulus?"
Two things should occur to you. One: Ah, yeah! Two: Ah, now!
Not so with the government.
Forever the tax tease, when politicians talk stimulus, they keep stringing you along.
Lots of sweet talk. Lots of promises. Lots of salivating details just what they'll give you.
They just leave out when they'll give it to you.
And in the case of all these stimulus packages, I hate to burst your love bubble, but nothing any time soon.
Under the best of circumstances, even if these guys hurriedly agreed on a package in a couple of weeks — not remotely likely, by the way — you wouldn't see that rebate check until April or May at the earliest.
And very likely later than that.
Could you imagine panting in eager anticipation that long? Forget it.
By then you've lost interest, lost attention and lost hope.
What politicians teasing you with these hot little checks don't tell you is that they hope at least in the near future, you don't mind the seduction.
The cheap tease, and the cheap reward.
And leaving out in the end, the even cheaper, almost used feeling of finding a few bucks on a table.
And a pounding, nagging question in your heart.
Were you just rewarded? Or were you just violated?
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Neil Cavuto serves as senior vice president, anchor and managing editor for both FOX News Channel (FNC) and FOX Business Network (FBN). He is anchor of FNC's Your World with Cavuto - the number one rated cable news program for the 4 p.m. timeslot - as well as the FNC Saturday show Cavuto on Business. He also hosts Cavuto on FBN weeknights at 8 p.m. In addition to anchoring daily programs and breaking news specials on FNC and FBN, Cavuto oversees business news content for both networks and FNC's weekend business shows, including Bulls & Bears, Forbes on Fox, and Cashin' In. Click here for more on Neil Cavuto.