Looks Like Al Gore is Running for President in 2004

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Hi, I'm Bill O'Reilly.  Thank you for watching us tonight.

Well, Al Gore is running for president in 2004. And that is the subject of this evening's Talking Points Memo.

Mr. Gore opened his campaign with an op-ed piece in yesterday's [Sunday] New York Times entitled "Broken Promises Administration Political Deception."

Before we analyze what Mr. Gore said, I want to say that we're trying hard to treat the former vice president fairly, but in the past he has made that very difficult. While most of his Democratic colleagues come on The Factor and mix it up, Mr. Gore has always rudely turned us down. And in fact, he rarely answers direct questions from anyone, preferring to give memorized speeches.

Anyway, Mr. Gore made a number of points in his article, so let's run them down.

One, he says that he and Bill Clinton stood up for the little guy and the Bush administration does not.  Well, that kind of general statement is pretty much worthless.  But I will point out that under Clinton-Gore American workers paid more taxes than at any time since World War II.

Mr. Gore then pounds Mr. Bush over the environment, and here the former vice president is correct. Inexplicably, the Bush administration has not urged conservation or stepped up alternative fuel programs. This is not about tree-hugging, this is about protecting ourselves against nations like Saudi Arabia, which could do us great harm.

Al Gore then returns to his mantra drumbeat, accusing President Bush of, quote, "tax giveaways for the few." As Factor viewers know, I think that increased government spending and increased taxation on any level is destructive to the country.

It is estimated that the government wastes up to 50 cents on every tax dollar it receives. Gore wants to raise tax rates on the wealthy more in order to spend more money. And right now, we have one of the biggest-spending Congresses in history. When does it all end?

Finally, Mr. Gore is linking the corporate scandals to the Bush administration, demanding that Mr. Bush release the SEC documents that cleared him in the Harken case.  Well, I'm down with that. Mr. Bush should put those documents out.

But hey, Al Gore, what about you and the Buddhist money people in Los Angeles? People went to jail in that case.  What about you and campaign finance shenanigans? And what about chief Democratic fund raiser Terry McAuliffe, your pal, making $18 million from Global Crossing stock, which then collapsed into bankruptcy?  What about that?

Come on. Your administration, Mr. Gore, was about as corrupt as it gets.

Summing up, Al Gore believes higher taxes will revive the economy. That's nuts. He wants an aggressive environmental policy. That's good. And finally, he says the Bush administration is too cozy with corporate America, which might be fair, but no administration was more accommodating to the money men than Clinton-Gore.

So there you have it, and good luck to you, Al. Hope to see right here on The Factor very soon.

That's "The Memo."

The Most Ridiculous Item of the Day

Time now for the "Most Ridiculous Item of the Day."

Video: Watch "The Most Ridiculous Item"

Comedian Dana Carvey has a new movie out called Master of Disguise, in which he does a variety of impressions.  But that's not what impressed us.  What got our attention is this. 

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

DANA CARVEY, COMEDIAN:  Fair and balanced news here from Fox.

UNIDENTIFIED MALE:  Well, we're glad you're...

CARVEY:  It's not like communist NNN.  Ted Turner is left of the left bank.  My point is this, if I could, if counselor.  I love that, counselor is so patronizing to a lawyer.  Counselor, you've got an idea, but it's just not working.  I'm Bill O'Reilly.  And I know everything about everything.  I have an opinion and I pretty much know everything.  I'm completely unflappable.  None of your business.  Shut your face.  Get out of my face. 

UNIDENTIFIED MALE:  Mr. O'Reilly, you said you'd let me have the last word. 

CARVEY:  No, you don't get the last word, counselor.  I gave you the last word.  And you know, you've got to look at these things, and you got understand that it's just not true what you just said.  And what's true is what I said.  And I'm (UNINTELLIGIBLE).  Sorry, Phil.  Go back to Marlo.  It's not happening.  You're getting a .13.  Basically Dennis Miller.  Chung is out of there.  Too much Povich time.  Donahue, too much with the Marlo. 

(END VIDEO CLIP)

O'REILLY:  Keep the caffeine away from Dana.  Ridiculous?  You make the call.

— You can watch Bill O'Reilly's Talking Points and "Most Ridiculous Item" weeknights at 8 & 11p.m. ET on the Fox News Channel. Send your comments to: oreilly@foxnews.com