Youngsters at the Volunteer State’s flagship university are about to engage in all sorts of debauchery ranging from lessons on male sexual fluidity to a lecture on “butt stuff” from an amateur porn star.
Sex Week at the University of Tennessee-Knoxville kicks off April 4 - five days of depravity that makes Mardi Gras on Bourbon Street look like a Sunday school picnic.
The star of the show is Sophia St. James, a self-described “queer diesel femme.” St. James will be teaching the boys and girls on Rocky Top how to “explore all the titillating crevices and protrusions of your body.”
“Fellatio, cunnilingus, analingus; maybe you’ve heard the word, now it’s time to find out about doing the deed,” reads a description of the Sex Week workshop.
The university will also provide testing around campus all week for sexually transmitted diseases – which might not be a bad idea.
Organizers of Sex Week told the blog Campus Reform there was great interest from the student body for workshops on bondage, domination, submission/sadism and masochism – not to mention, “How to Drive a Vulva.”
“These events are critically important and were chosen based on an overwhelming number of requests from the UT student body, whose feedback we rely heavily upon in selecting our events,” one of the event organizers told the website.
Critics, however, are furious – especially state lawmakers and alumni.
“The content is horrifically disturbing,” State Rep. Kevin Brooks told me. “The fact that we are using state dollars and state classrooms on state campuses to promote UT Sex Week is unforgiveable.”
Lawmakers are advancing a bill that would prohibit UT from using any state money to promote Sex Week. The bill, authored by State Rep. Micah Van Huss, would also strip $100,000 in funding for the university’s office of diversity and inclusion.
“These are taxpayer dollars, taxpayer funds,” Van Huss told me. “Frankly, (Sex Week) doesn’t represent the values of my constituents and the majority of Tennesseans.”
According to Campus Reform, event organizers are using private donations to pay for Sex Week.
Van Huss said his phones have been ringing non-stop from angry alumni and citizens.
“They are embarrassed by their alma mater and that sends a pretty powerful statement,” he said.
Over the past few years, a number of national controversies have given the university a black eye – most recently an “unofficial” recommendation from the Office of Diversity and Inclusion that campus Christmas parties avoid the Baby Jesus and Santa Claus.
“Ensure your holiday party is not a Christmas party in disguise,” the university office warned.
And in the fall of 2015, the vice chancellor for diversity and inclusion recommended that the campus use “gender inclusive” pronouns.
Lawmakers have pleaded with the university’s administration to fix the problem – but so far – their pleas have fallen on deaf ears.
“We are absolutely shocked that this continues after repeated requests directly to the UT administration to cease and desist,” Brooks said. “If the administration of the university system is not going to listen – we are going to legislate. And we are going to represent what our voters want.”
Van Huss was even more to the point.
“I don’t trust the University of Tennessee to fix this,” he said. “I don’t want to micromanage the university, but when they have shown again and again and again that they are incapable of fixing it on their own – I’ve got to step in.”
So hang in there, taxpayers. State lawmakers are about to get to the bottom of “butt stuff” and they promise to rectify the situation.
Todd Starnes is host of Fox News & Commentary. His latest book is “The Deplorables’ Guide to Making America Great Again.” Follow him on Twitter @ToddStarnes and find him on Facebook.