Mind and Body

Fitness bikini model shares anorexia battle to help others struggling with body image

Kaitlyn Davidson shares before and after photos with her followers.

Kaitlyn Davidson shares before and after photos with her followers.

A 24-year-old anorexia survivor is inspiring others with her new, fit body and a modeling gig by posting before-and-after photos online.

Kaitlyn Davidson, of Sydney Australia, used to weigh less than 81 pounds. She told news.com.au she never realized her love for health and fitness had become an obsession until she was in constant pain, her hair fell out, and she could feel her own heart beating.

“There’s a fine line between fitness and obsession, and I didn’t realize I’d crossed that line until it was too late,” Davidson told news.com.au.

Davidson said she was left in constant pain, her skin had turned yellow, and her teeth were degrading. The girl who had once dreamed of becoming a bikini model now had trouble walking, but it wasn’t enough to keep her away from the gym or consume enough food— not even when doctors warned the stress was verging on stopping her heart.

As promised I will continue to share more of my journey so here it is. On the left was me almost 3 years ago on my 21st birthday. To date the toughest year I've been through. I had finally begun to accept that I had been feeding an obsession of exhausting myself physically and mentally which manifested into an addiction; a feeling that I couldn't identify was feeding an eating disorder and taking over my life. I never associated myself with having an ED (eating disorder) although after hearing the same message from everyone around me I couldn't ignore what was happening anymore. I believed I had full control of what I was doing when in fact I was completely out of control, my ED had consumed my whole life and I was in a daily battle between two minds - the ED mind and my rational mind. My anxiety levels where through the roof and the battle daily was exhausting but with a naturally competitive nature I never gave up on knowing I could beat this. I began reading a lot about the brain and cognitive thinking and knew I had to use the same mindset that got me to this state and channel it to get me out. 2 and a half years later the picture on the right was a moment I had visualised all through recovery. Knowing I would achieve this goal one day was what motivated me to push through some of the toughest days of my life. I now love the person I am because I literally fought to become her. I am grateful every day to simply have a functioning body that allows me to train hard and live life to the fullest. Out of all of this I hope I can help someone even in the slightest way to know that anything is possible and you can always achieve what the mind believes 💗 #itaintweaktospeak

A photo posted by KAITLYN DAVIDSON (@kaitlynmaree_x) on

“I wasn’t eating enough,” she told the news site. “I had so many fear foods I couldn’t touch, I couldn’t even come into some foods’ vicinity. Food wasn’t for energy, it was to be burnt, I’d have to burn it all off.”

It’s not clear how, but Davidson came across Portia de Rossi’s autobiography in which the star details her own battle with anorexia. She quickly realized that she too suffered from the illness and began her road to recovery.

“It’s so exhausting when you’re fighting in your own head and people around you tell you to get help,” she told news.com.au. “They want a quick fix.”

She never stopped going to the gym, and at first it was difficult for her to keep food down. Others wanted her to abandon her dream of becoming a bikini model, but she couldn’t.

“Anorexia is not a body type or a body shape, it’s a mental illness. You still need to treat it, even once the weight has been gained,” she told the news site.

Now recovered, she competes in World Bikini Fitness and Fashion and posts on social media regularly to help others who may be going through the same battles. She shares photos illustrating her transformation on her Instagram account, where she has garnered more than 12,000 followers.

“When I was lying in my bedroom in constant pain and felt like it was going to end for me, having someone I looked up to made me feel there was a road ahead,” she said. “And now I’m living the life I dreamt of living.”

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