Here's what's happening:
• As part of their annual sexy-lady Advent Calendar — yes, we know how ridiculous that sounds — LOVE magazine has released footage of Sports Illustrated model Irina Shayk oiling herself up at the beach. But unlike the similar footage you captured while stalking Irina last summer, this video has a festive Christmas soundtrack.
• Speaking of total babes, we recently interviewed Swimsuit Issue veteran Kate Bock about some of the silliest (and often dangerous) things she does to help her photographers snap a perfect pic. Watch the video below to find out what they were, then because again: total babe.
• Rock singer Scott Weiland, formerly of Stone Temple Pilots and Velvet Revolver, reportedly passed away in his sleep during a tour stop in Minnesota with his new band, the Wildabouts. He was 48 years old, and he will be remembered fondly for his prolific contribution to alternative and hard rock music, and for giving us one of the only enjoyable Teletubbies productions ever filmed:
• It was announced on Thursday that Coldplay will be headlining the 2016 Super Bowl Haltime Show in February. Us Weekly reports that other "friends of the group" will also make appearances, which can only mean that Gwyneth Paltrow will be singing backup vocals in a effort to further complicate hers and Chris Martin's relationship.
• The color experts at Pantone have decided that "rose quartz" and "serenity" are the official colors of 2016 (below), replacing the wine-colored "marsala" shade they chose last year. So quick, burn any marsala items you currently own and replace them with pinks and blues, lest the Pantone pigment police come and forcibly "re-hue" you.
• Former "Beverly Hills, 90210" actor Jason Priestley will reportedly be directing a biographical film about late "SNL" funnyman Phil Hartman, which doesn't make much sense until you remember that Priestley once hosted "SNL" during Hartman's tenure, and still barely makes sense even after that knowledge.
• NBC has released several funny promos for this weekend's episode of "SNL" hosted by Ryan Gosling (below), but all of them hinge on the tired notion that Gosling is every woman's dream. In fact, we bet even Ryan is tired of that concept, so if he's reading, we'd like to invite him to FNM's studios to discuss the matter over a bottle or seven of Merlot.
• According to Page Six, "Orange is the New Black" actress Dascha Polanco (Dayanara) appeared in court on Thursday following allegations that she punched a 17-year-old girl back in July. It's not yet clear what penalties Polanco faces if convicted, but we're confident she can beat the rap by just blaming it all on Pennsatucky.
• And finally, just five days after giving birth to her newborn daughter Chanel, reality star Coco Austin shared a post-pregnancy photo on Instagram looking like she's never even incubated a sandwich in her belly, let alone a growing human fetus (below). Naturally, we have to assume she somehow gestated this child in her chest.