Updated

Here's what everybody's buzzing about today:

Michael Douglas has signed on to appear in Marvel's upcoming "Ant-Man" adaptation, playing the original Ant-Man to Paul Rudd's more contemporary Ant-Man. Ant-Man, Ant-Man, Ant-Man!

Taylor Swift was seen chatting with Golden Globe-winner Jared Leto after the show, so the media immediately appointed him as her next romantic target. So get going on that, Taylor.

Ex-"Partridge Family" heartthrob David Cassidy earned his third DUI in just three years. Presumably, he assumes that once he accumulates 10 strikes on his record, he can earn a free fancy coffee drink of his choosing.

Some socialite named Lady Victoria Hervey wore possibly the most revealing dress of Golden Globes night to an after-party. But we still applaud Miranda Kerr for

Jerry Seinfeld and Jason Alexander gave onlookers a surreal sense of deja vu when they both strolled into Tom's Restaurant ("Seinfeld" fans might know it as Monk's Cafe) on Monday in NYC.

Ashlee Simpson got engaged to Diana Ross' son Evan Ross. This will be her second marriage, following her first to musician Pete Wentz of Fall Out Boy.

We're not exactly sure when, but Pamela Anderson got re-married to her ex-husband (and Paris Hiton sex-tape partner) Rick Salomon.

Despite retiring from all public life, Shia LaBeouf went on Twitter to attack Jim Carrey after the comedian took a jab at him at the Golden Globes on Sunday. He then apologized almost immediately.

Kanye West is under investigation for assault after he allegedly punching a guy who was threatening Kim and hurling racial slurs.

Kate Upton might be back with her old boyfriend Justin Verlander. The two were spotted at a hockey game in Philadelphia looking not repulsed by each other.

And finally, PepsiCo has debuted a new line of bottled water, simply called "Qua." Get it? It's like "aqua," but much dumber.