Trump unveils 'America first' national security strategy

This is a rush transcript from "The Five," December 18, 2017. This copy may not be in its final form and may be updated.

KIMBERLY GUILFOYLE, CO-HOST: Hello, everyone. I'm Kimberly Guilfoyle along with Juan Williams, Jesse Watters, Dana Perino and Greg Gutfeld. It's 5 o'clock in New York City, and this is "The Five."

This is a Fox News alert: President Trump has unveiled his strategy for national security, one that enshrines his America First campaign approach as U.S. policy. In an address at the Ronald Reagan building in Washington, the president outlined a plan that includes defeating ISIS, protecting the U.S. from North Korea and securing our borders among other topics. The president also spoke about living a greater America to our children and our grandchildren. Watch.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

DONALD TRUMP, PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA: On top of everything else, our leaders drifted from American principles. They lost sight of America's destiny and they lost their belief in American greatness. On January 20, 2017, I stood on the steps of the capital. To herald the day the people became the rulers of their nation again. American success is not a foregone conclusion. It must be earned and it must be won. Together we will leave our children and grandchildren a nation that is stronger, better, freer, prouder and yes, an America that is greater than ever before.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

GUILFOYLE: Greg, I know what you're going to say so I can't call on you right now. Dana?

(LAUGHTER)

DANA PERINO, CO-HOST: Well, our national security strategy is something that is congressionally mandated, but a president could wait a couple, three years even before they do something. And I think that any president that puts out a plan, like that's the plan until breaking news changes everything.

GUILFOYLE: Right.

PERINO: . which is -- you never know what's going to pop up in the world. And every problem in the world ends up on the president's desk. There's two things that I really liked about it. In particular, you're going to see a push about this next year and we need to talk about it more, which is military readiness and the state of our military, repairs that are needed for our planes and new planes that are needed, the new equipment. And also, all the cybersecurity issues that we're dealing with. The president touched on that a little bit, and I think you'll see a push in the New Year, especially when it comes to funding. The other thing that I like to hearing him say was that as a force for good throughout its history, America will use influence -- it's influence to advance our interests and benefit humanity, and I think that really does keeps us separate from other countries in he world. That we are exceptional for a reason and that really is the main reason.

GUILFOYLE: All right. So you liked it? I mean, definitely seems you thought about American exceptionalism.

PERINO: I mean the thought of it made sense to me. Like, protecting the homeland.

GUILFOYLE: Sure.

PERINO: . I get it. American prosperity. If America is doing better economically, that means you have more money in the world and more influence and more money to pay for military readiness in order to protect the country, and also economic freedom is a part of that. Preserve peace through strength and advance American influence. If you're just reading it that way, you could say any president over the past 200 years could have had similar things.

(CROSSTALK)

PERINO: When he talked about it in -- you heard like the sort of first half of the speech was really going through the list of accomplishments that he thinks he's had over this past year, and then he got to the strategies. So, it all fitted together at the end, but for me the two things that stood out the most was military readiness, which we know we have a huge problem with and that has to get fix, and the second piece being this -- saying that we will continue to be a force for good in the world, which the world needs.

GUILFOYLE: OK, Greg, you heard some different things as well in there.

GREG GUTFELD, CO-HOST: No, I heard kind of the same things. I mean, I'm always tired of hearing it's always about the children.

GUILFOYLE: Right.

GUTFELD: But I'm OK with that. This is a central piece of his agenda. I called it the stool of security. So, it's a table with three legs. One of them is national security, dealing with our enemies and adversaries like ISIS north and North Korea. Then you have domestic security, which is basically reinvigorating the way the country feels and appreciate law enforcement because we've saw them disrespected for so long. And the third is the border, which is linked to the above. The border becomes more valuable in terms of national security when you have terrorism and you have technologies. Those are the three legs on this stool. But the big point here is, somewhere along the line is government grew we've lost the plot. What is government for, primarily? This. Without this, the stool of security, you don't have freedom or prosperity. Security and strength guarantees freedom and prosperity. The last thing, politically, is that if you don't like Trump or you just couldn't get -- you just couldn't accept him, this is a kind of agenda that makes you overlook the small stuff that bugs you. You know what I mean. I've said this before, if somebody is right on the big picture, you can forgive or overlook the smaller, more embarrassing Polaroids. You know, so what if he tweets and there's always this kind of underlying chaos and conflict. Somebody is right on the big picture, it doesn't matter. When we look back, we will realize that it didn't matter. No one will remember a lot of this stuff. But we will remember the strong military and enhanced security and no terrorism.

GUILFOYLE: All right. Well, great point. This immigration and border protection are also key components of President Trump's new national security strategy. Watch this.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

TRUMP: Leaders in Washington imposed on the country an immigration policy that Americans never voted for, never asked for, and never approved. A policy where the wrong people are allowed into our country, and the right people are rejected. American citizens as usual have been left to bear the cost and to pick up the tab. A nation without borders is not a nation.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

GUILFOYLE: OK, Jesse, your reaction to this.

JESSE WATTERS, CO-HOST: I think he was trying to strike a very clean break from past administrations by saying he's here to ignite a reawakening in American confidence, and usher in a rebirth of pride and patriotism and prosperity by putting America first and putting the people above the powerful, and American greatness has to be guarded vigilantly because our destiny is not assured. And he tried to inspire all the American people to be competitive in a new competitive world, and pointed out China and Russia as other great nations that are trying to see is what we have. And then he pointed to all the litany of failures from past administrations, taxpayers bailing out other alliances, jobs being fleeced by overseas out of country, spending a lot of blood and treasure on wars where we tied. And he went along that list but then like Greg said, pointed out to the four pillars. Protect the homeland, and you just heard him. Border security, and that's the wall. That's reinforcing our great border patrol agents, and that's getting rid of things like chain migration and the visa lottery.

Also, defeating ISIS and make sure they can't come over here. But then promoting peace and prosperity, and that's through cutting taxes and cutting regulations. And not signing bad trade deals where workers get hosed and big companies make out great, and then preserving peace through strength. Taking about a huge reinvestment in our military, but also focusing on modern threats like missile-defense and cyber. And then at the end, he kind of tweaked President Obama, he's trying to focus on realism, not idealism. We're not going to try to impose our way of life on other people, and we're not going to lead from behind, so we're going to champion our values, and I think he believes that's the best opportunity for us to maintain our number one posture.

GUILFOYLE: Loves being number one, Jesse. OK. So Juan, did you hear this through the same prism that Jesse did?

JUAN WILLIAMS, CO-HOST: Not at all. I certainly agree with Jesse that he was playing against, you know, grievance politics, going at all the presidents who came before, when in fact this -- I think, I think somebody else in the panel, maybe you, Dana, said it could be any other president. This is basically in keeping with our national security framework.

GUILFOYLE: Yes, she said that.

WILLIAMS: But where it differs, and to me he identified it. So you've got to give him credit for that. Is that China and Russia are exerting increasing evidence that they want to increase their profile in the world globally. So to me, if you look at Asia where we backed out of the Asian trade deal, I see China stepping up, and it's not only stepping up in terms of economics but militarily. Similarly, Russia in the Middle East, given what happened in Syria but also with Iran. You see Russia playing a bigger role. So Trump identifies that, but he then doesn't say exactly how we will respond. To the contrary, he says we're going to be more focused on our interests and our security. Well, of course, he's going to focus on our security, but I don't see that we are taking the necessary steps to fight back against Russia and China's growing influence in the world. I was out at that Reagan library the other day for the national defense forum, and this is what the defense experts are saying, is that there's a lot of talk from Trump, a lot of rhetoric, but no action in terms of saying here is what our Middle East policies is going to be.

GUTFELD: But this is -- he is reprioritizing. The number one threat isn't Russia, the number one threat isn't China, its existential terror. That's the ball that he sees. These other things are behind that ball and he will deal with them, and maybe they can help. Maybe Russia can help with terror. When you look at it from that angle, that's what happens.

WILLIAMS: I don't agree with you. And by the way, there was an interesting phone call over the weekend between Trump and Putin, where Putin thanked, apparently, Trump for intelligence that boarded attacks that would have taken place in St. Petersburg. But I don't think that terror is the number one issue here. If you're talking about our national security structure, I think you are talking about the possibility that terror would be generated in a place like the Middle East, especially after what he did with Jerusalem.

GUILFOYLE: Well, President Trump also addressed the strategic goal of the U.S., which was destroying ISIS.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

TRUMP: We have dealt ISIS one devastating defeat after another. The correlation to defeat ISIS has now recaptured almost 100 percent of the land once held by these terrorists in Iraq and in Syria. Great job.

(APPLAUSE)

TRUMP: We're now chasing them wherever they flee, and we will not let them into the United States.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

GUILFOYLE: OK. So focus now on our national security, obviously, on borders, a strong immigration policy, peace through strength. Echoes some of the comments you made earlier about former presidents, past presidents really focusing on this, kind of Reaganesque theme, and then here, using a specific example, talk extensive, ISIS.

PERINO: Right. I do think that technology has advanced so much in -- just in 16 years. And one of the things that you can do is shrink ISIS's territory. You can even prevent them from getting in here. But we have shown in just the last months that we continue to have a problem with online radicalization. So, ISIS is able still to put videos online to try to figure out a way to get to people. And the president is saying, OK, the first thing we have to do as a part of America first is figure out a way to use the tools that we have been in order to prevent that from happening. He doesn't spell it all out in here, and you can't in a national security document. A lot of these stuff has to be classified.

But I do think that he will have to have quite a strong push, and probably you'll see it in the state of the union, that military readiness which includes dealing with possibilities of biological terror, online terror attacks like cyberattacks. And then, you had somebody like China just to pull this all together, as that what Juan was talking about. This morning, China released a huge plan for its government to be the number one artificial intelligence creator and technology developer in the world. So they're like way ahead in terms of that type of planning, and we don't want to be playing second fiddle to that. So there's a lot that's going to happen. And I think this next year, in fact, you set the stage for how are you going to provide the resources to our military and intelligence forces in order to do that.

WATTERS: Those resources, $700 billion investment, that's a historic investment in the U.S. military. And to Juan's point, I mean, he's ripped up the rules of engagement which allowed us to destroy the caliphate over there. No artificial timelines in Afghanistan. The Iran revolutionary guard is now labeled as a terrorist organization. That bad deal is also in the cross hairs. And the North Korea situation, major sanctions slapped on them. So to say that the president isn't really doing anything or hasn't really spelled out how he's doing it. Juan, you want to remain unpredictable, but I think there's a lot of leather out there.

GUTFELD: I can't remember which Sunday show, yesterday. It was pretty funny. They're interviewing some dude, some expert, and he was talking about -- beginning about how Trump had a bad year. Trump had a bad year except for ISIS. Except for ISIS. The economy is doing pretty good. (INAUDIBLE) But he had a really bad year. Yeah, except for ISIS. It's like, if all he did was ISIS, that's a pretty damn great year. But the way, we had other news today -- I don't know how true it is, but what a difference from Obama who gave a pass to Hezbollah. I'm not sure if that's true, but it's something that maybe we should look into.

WILLIAMS: I think you guys should pick up a copy of a newspaper and in it would say, oh, my gosh. Look, President Bush, President Obama, all of these people were fighting terror all along.

(CROSSTALK)

WATTERS: That's what Politico said.

WILLIAMS: No, no. That's what you say.

(CROSSTALK)

GUTFELD: Was it Politico?

PERINO: Yeah.

GUTFELD: So it wasn't crazy.

WILLIAMS: It was crazy.

GUILFOYLE: No, no, no.

GUTFELD: Because you like Politico.

PERINO: And Bret Baier is going to have a big thing on it tonight, that very story.

GUILFOYLE: So there you go. That's deep tease. Coming up, President Trump says he's not happy with the way the Mueller investigation is being handled. You're going to hear his plans on dealing with the special counsel, next.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

WATTERS: It's a big week on Capitol Hill as key players in the FBI and Justice Department are testifying before lawmakers. Sources tell Fox News, Bruce Ohr, who the DOJ recently demoted is being questioned today in a closed-door hearing about Fusion GPS. And tomorrow, deputy FBI director Andrew McCabe is set to appear before the house intelligence committee. This weekend, President Trump doubled down on saying there is no collusion with Russia.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

TRUMP: Not looking good. Not looking good. It's quite sad to see that. My people were very upset about it. I can't imagine there's anything on him, frankly, because as we said, there's no collusion. There's no collusion whatsoever. But a lot of lawyers thought that was pretty sad.

(INAUDIBLE)

TRUMP: No, I'm not.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

WATTERS: All right. So Gutfeld, let's start with the Mueller firing. In the beginning of the weekend, it was -- he's going to fire Robert Mueller, and in the end, he wasn't. What was that all about?

GUTFELD: No, it's great. On twitter all these celebrities were threatening to take to the streets, blamed on a rumor that they probably started. They go, oh, my God. He's going to fire Mueller. Let's go to the street. Who told you that? Well, the other guy on twitter told me that. This is a real boring version of the Hatfield and the McCoy's. The media and the Democrats were the Hatfield's. They just never expected the McCoy's to show up. It's always been a one-sided fight. So now they have, like, OK, you've got collusion. We yell corruption. You yell Russia. We yelled deep state. It's a lot of energy. It's like a game of tic-tac-toe that always ends in cat. It allows two sides to dig in. And I really do think this cancels each other out. Both sides has got to go like that, it's a push.

WATTERS: And the first question he was asked by reporters when he was wearing that Amazing USA hat, Kimberly, was about all these Trump transition emails that were seized by Robert Mueller's investigators. People say, you know what, that was overly aggressive move by the investigators, and then Mueller's teams said, hey, this is fair game. What do you think?

GUILFOYLE: Well, it depends on what side of it you come down on to say, OK, wait, this looks like tremendous overreach in terms of a big document and information grab to get a swath of information about pre-campaign, and during the campaign, and transition officials. I mean, even had Don Jr. going and testifying. And then he saw leaks right after that coming out by shifts. The whole thing to me is not coming off a very good at all because it just seems like there's a specific intended purpose to undermine the president. We're going to see what Mueller has to say. I don't think he's going to remove him whatsoever. There's nothing to hide. There is no collusion. Everyone has cooperated and testified. You're getting to the bottom of what was going on in this investigation and the unclean hands that are there. So let the truth come out, to silence it once and for all that they didn't do anything wrong.

WATTERS: And the president's lawyers, Dana, say that they expect this investigation to be wrapping up fairly soon.

PERINO: I'm sure they hope so, and I think I hope so.

WATTERS: I think we all hope so, except Juan.

PERINO: I do think though -- if the Trump lawyers hadn't been surprised that these documents were obtained, then they would have actually been in a better position. I am surprised that they were surprised. When you work at a transition office and you are given a .gov email -- when you get the email you agree that all of those emails are subject to being able to search at any point. Just like an employer here, can come on and look at your Fox News account.

GUTFELD: No, they can't.

WATTERS: I hope not.

(CROSSTALK)

PERINO: And so, if -- I think that the Trump team lawyers were really concerned these were taken inappropriately that they would go to the judge, not to congress, and to the court of public opinion to try to undermine it.

WATTERS: And this seems to be a campaign in the court of public opinion, Juan, of trying to work the refs as they do in sports. You criticize and criticize, and hopefully it can have an effect.

WILLIAMS: Well, I don't think there's any question. I think that what this is. It's a whole propaganda campaign against Robert Mueller, against the Justice Department, against the FBI. Even as you have Trump officials like Jeff Sessions, the attorney general, like Christopher Wray, the FBI director, saying, no, these people are doing a good job. They're patriots and they're working hard to protect America. But just what we've heard last week, as the president was leaving was he said no collusion. He talks about himself, but he doesn't talk about all the aids that were involved in the campaign. And that's why I think a lot of people were, Greg, thinking, oh, something is being set up here that would allow him to justify going after Robert Mueller. But I think now we even have a spat between Fox and Friends and Hannity.

GUTFELD: No, don't say that. Don't say that. Not around the holidays.

WILLIAMS: Yes, I know, I know.

WATTERS: Juan, it seems like the more, more Democrats investigate this president, the more crimes they find that they committed. Coming up, days before Christmas, thousands of flights grounded. How will you be impacted? Next.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

PERINO: A Fox News alert. We are monitoring developments in a major train derailment in Washington State that left multiple people dead and injured. The Amtrak train jumped the tracks and part of it crashed down on to a highway. Dan Springer is on the scene with the latest. Dan?

DAN SPRINGER, FOX NEWS: Yeah. And Dana, that death toll stands at six, according to the Associated Press. A national transportation safety board go team is in route to Washington State from Washington, D.C., and we expect them to be here this afternoon and fully here by this evening. If I step out of the way, you can see that we now have a lot of large equipment, caterpillars and other equipment that will eventually be used to take those train cars off of interstate 5 here in DuPont, Washington, which is about 50 miles south of Seattle. Several of these cars jumped the tracks and fell onto vehicles that were southbound on I-5, killing six people. All those who were killed were in the train. Nobody on the ground, nobody in cars below were killed, but 77 people were taken to local hospitals. They have, obviously, various degrees of injuries.

This was an inaugural trip for this Amtrak train which connects Seattle to Portland. It was meant to be a high-speed train that would shave 15 minutes off of the travel between those two cities. It's a more direct route, but it also has a sharper curve here. So an NTSB investigators get on the scene, they will obviously be looking at the speed at which that train was traveling. There's also been an unconfirmed report of an obstruction on the track. Again, all the things the NTSB investigators will be looking out when they get here. In the meantime, we have a lot of equipment assembled here. The goal, once the investigators get here is to clean up this scene and get this interstate reopened as quickly as possible. This is a major artery that goes all the way from Canada to Mexico, and 60,000 vehicles passed through here southbound each day. So they want to get this open up as quickly as possible. Dana?

PERINO: All right, Dan, thank you so much. Meanwhile, on another story we're following, power is now finally restored in Hartsfield Jackson Atlanta International Airport after plunging into darkness yesterday, grounding over 1,000 fights and causing a holiday travel nightmare across the country.

Officials say a fire in an underground electrical facility is responsible for bringing the world's largest airport to a standstill.

So Kimberly, did you see this yesterday? The power goes out at 1 p.m. It's not restored fully until midnight. Everybody is trapped.

GUILFOYLE: Yes, and I saw the pictures of everybody at the airport. And they're, like, in darkness and just, like, piled up on, like, luggage. You couldn't tell the difference between Samsonite and humans. Very interesting to me.

But you know, it really sucks during the holidays when you have this kind of, like, you know, disaster happen when you're trying to get to see loved ones, and then get rerouted. And like, what are you going to do and what about your hotel? And are they going to care.

PERINO: Or finish out your last week at work before the holiday.

GUILFOYLE: The whole thing. And so it's very challenging, especially, I mean, Atlanta is a hugely busy -- busy, busy airport. I mean, it's unbelievable the amount of international flights and traffic coming in and out of there. So I mean, just think about it. It's like the equivalent of something happening...

PERINO: Well, even though apparently -- well, they don't know what happened, Greg. They don't think it was anything. Nobody...

GUILFOYLE: Cyber terror.

PERINO: ... messed with it or cyber terror. But I did think that it shows just how easily disrupted our lives are.

GUTFELD: It could be artificial intelligence pretending it's an accident...

GUILFOYLE: Robots, yes.

GUTFELD: ... already self-aware, are doing these little tests.

This actually is, like you said, it's a nice dry run on how an attack on our grid might look and feel, except if you enlarge it to entire states and extend the duration and differently.

Because you don't need to invade a country if you just have the humans in the country turn on themselves. Which I mean, if that went on another day, you know, people would be -- people would be eating each other, Dana.

No, it's like they would open up a -- get out free food. The one thing, though, is like, this is why I always do carry-on, and I always have booze and a book and an iPod.

GUILFOYLE: And pills.

GUTFELD: If stuff goes bad, I just leave. I just go, "You know what?"

PERINO: That's amazing. I think I would have left, too. Because Juan, I know a lot of people couldn't necessarily get out of the airport. They didn't have anywhere to go. But if you had an option, would you have left? Everybody looked very calm.

GUILFOYLE: And no chargers.

GUTFELD: No chargers.

WILLIAMS: It wasn't -- it wasn't, you know, pitch black. It was that they didn't have power. They had emergency generators. But the problem was, and especially, I relate to this with some intensity, that if you flew in during this period, they were told you can't get to the gate.

GUTFELD: Yes, that's the worst part.

WILLIAMS: You can't operate all the stuff that's...

PERINO: Yes.

GUTFELD: Yes.

WILLIAMS: ... necessary for you to get off the plane. So they had people just sitting on the plane for hours. It's terrible.

GUTFELD: Oh, God. Imagine that bathroom.

PERINO: No, no, no, the bathroom thing. I was thinking about that.

WILLIAMS: Forget about it.

PERINO: Jesse, did you know that...

GUTFELD: You can't.

PERINO: ... Chick-Fil-A is usually closed on Sundays. They opened, and they delivered food to stranded passengers after Atlanta's mayor called for assistance around 10 p.m. So they opened up and got the job done.

WATTERS: I would have just pretended I was stranded just to get free Chick-Fil-A.

GUILFOYLE: You've done worse.

WATTERS: Here are my travel tips.

PERINO: OK.

WATTERS: Travel insurance, buy it. There's a little box you can check whenever you buy a flight or a hotel.

PERINO: Yes. It's not that expensive.

WATTERS: It's only, like, ten or 15 or $20.

GUILFOYLE: I recommend that.

WATTERS: Yes. Greg and I were talking about Clear.

GUTFELD: Yes.

WATTERS: Clear is like TSA precheck on steroids. You don't have to do anything except put your irises on a little thing. It's like James Bond.

GUILFOYLE: Isn't that just, like, Washington?

WATTERS: You go right to the front.

GUILFOYLE: Like D.C. has it?

WATTERS: They've expanded it into other hubs.

And then the Delta Lounge, I know it's pricey, but you don't have to hang out with everybody else. And you can just eat all that free food.

GUILFOYLE: Elitist.

WATTERS: And drink free booze.

GUTFELD: The rabble. You don't want to be near the rabble, Jesse.

GUILFOYLE: By the way, now everyone's going to go.

WATTERS: I love this. And lastly, the whole thing that your parents tell you when you go for a flight.

GUTFELD: Fresh underwear?

WATTERS: Get there three hours before an international.

GUTFELD: Yes.

WATTERS: Two hours before domestic. No, one hour before domestic. 1.5 before international. Stop clogging the place up.

PERINO: I agree with that.

WATTERS: Right?

PERINO: They're clogging it up. That is the problem.

GUILFOYLE: They're clogging it up, but I have to strongly second the Delta Lounge.

WATTERS: Yes, that's fantastic.

GUTFELD: Oh, well, aren't we special?

PERINO: People go there...

GUTFELD: I have to second the fresh pair of underwear, wherever you go.

GUILFOYLE: ... trying to meet people.

WATTERS: They just go there to meet you.

PERINO: Absolutely. At all times. All right. Well, we're glad the power is back on.

When we return, this "Saturday Night Live" comedian is serious about showing his permanent love for Hillary Clinton. We'll explain.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

GUTFELD: Time for...

{BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: It's Just Too Easy!

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: It's Just Too Easy!

(END VIDEO CLIP)

GUTFELD: Great music, eh? Welcome to "It's Just Too Easy." It's when we do a story that's just too easy to ridicule, making it too hard to ignore.

So in this episode, Pete Davidson -- he's the nice kid from "Saturday Night Live" -- just got a tattoo of Hillary on his arm. When his friends asked him why, he said it was because Hillary was a badass. So now he has something in common with Hillary: They both have an ass on their arm. Hers was named Bill.

See, it's just too easy.

GUILFOYLE: Oh, my God.

GUTFELD: Now, I could say that this is the funniest thing Peter has ever done, but that's just too easy. I could say this is the funniest thing to come out of "SNL" this year, but that's just too easy. I could just laugh hysterically at this completely inaccurate likeness of Hillary. But that's just too easy.

So maybe it's better to ask why would you get a tattoo of Hillary when there are so many other more preferable options? Like a gorgeous dolphin. Look at that. Or maybe a delightful unicorn. That is so special. Or why not just me? Yes. Look at that. It's beautiful. Everyone should have me on their body -- tattoowise.

GUILFOYLE: Uh-oh. Someone might.

GUTFELD: Anyway, Pete, we get it. You care. You are morally superior, but woefully transparent in your appeasement. Tattoos like this illustrate that decisions based on feelings always end with something you really regret. Like choosing Hillary as your candidate, because it felt great to nominate a woman. She lost and yet tattoos are easier to disappear.

PERINO: That's funny.

GUTFELD: I just wanted to do this story so we could talk about tattoos. I'm going to start with you, Dana.

PERINO: OK.

GUTFELD: If you get a tattoo on your body, what tattoo would it be?

GUILFOYLE: I know.

PERINO: Well, I think, you know, I'm not for tattoos.

GUTFELD: Oh, no?

PERINO: But this is pretend.

GUTFELD: Yes.

PERINO: I would go with my main man, Jasper.

GUILFOYLE: I knew it!

GUTFELD: There you go.

PERINO: So cute.

GUTFELD: So you actually had this done this morning. That's great.

PERINO: That's not my arm.

GUTFELD: You have a very hairy arm.

PERINO: That's another reason I'm terrified of the tattoo. Doesn't it hurt terribly?

GUTFELD: Yes, it does. But that's why you get drunk. You do tons of shots and a couple pain pills. Everything is great, Kimberly.

GUILFOYLE: That's every day for you.

GUTFELD: Yes. Anyway, we won't get into that here.

Your tattoo, if you could.

GUILFOYLE: First of all, I have no tattoos on my body. Like Dana, I don't do them. Not going to happen.

However, to play along...

GUTFELD: Yes.

GUILFOYLE: ... or role-play, as they say.

GUTFELD: Yes, that's what they say.

GUILFOYLE: For this segment...

PERINO: Careful.

GUTFELD: Because you never role play.

GUILFOYLE: No. I would definitely get Ronan, my little munchkin, Ro-Dog. What a cutie.

WATTERS: There you go.

GUTFELD: You know the guy that -- the model we used for this, has tattoos all over his body. And then we kicked him out of the building. And we said, "Thanks." Paid him 50 bucks.

All right, Jesse.

GUILFOYLE: And that would be on my shoulder.

GUTFELD: Shoulder.

GUILFOYLE: I just want to make that clear to anyone who might be freaked out.

GUTFELD: Yes. Jesse, I'm dying to know what tattoo you would get.

WATTERS: I put a lot of thought into this, Greg.

GUTFELD: Yes.

WATTERS: And I came up with Dr. Sebastian Gorka.

WILLIAMS: Oh, my God.

GUILFOYLE: Gorka.

WATTERS: I think he'd look great on any appendage.

GUILFOYLE: Eww!

WATTERS: He's you know -- there's something terrifying about him but also really wholesome. He's, like, the most fascinating man. You know that commercial with the beer?

GUTFELD: Yes, yes, yes.

GUILFOYLE: Most interesting...

WATTERS: I mean, he's just fascinating on many levels.

GUILFOYLE: ... interesting man in the world.

WATTERS: I think it would be a nice conversation piece.

GUTFELD: Yes.

WATTERS: Women would like it. Men would like it. I mean, what's not to like?

GUTFELD: What if he gets arrested for some horrible crime?

GUILFOYLE: Even better.

WATTERS: That's like having the Hillary tattoo. You regret it.

GUTFELD: You regret it. All right.

GUILFOYLE: You can change it to Hillary.

GUTFELD: Juan, what is your tattoo?

WILLIAMS: Well, I don't think there's much doubt about it. If Pete's going to get Hillary, I've got to do something, you know, as a FOX News guy, what can I do?

GUTFELD: Yes.

WILLIAMS: I've got to get a triple. I've got to do everybody. There's Hannity. There's Laura Ingraham and Jeanine Pirro. In fact, I really wanted the girls on either side of Hannity, because I wanted, like, a propaganda special.

WATTERS: That is fair and balanced.

GUTFELD: That is absolutely incredible.

GUILFOYLE: I think it's actually quite attractive.

WILLIAMS: Did you like that one.

GUTFELD: I got a tattoo. Actually, this is actually on me. I got a tattoo of Tattoo from "Fantasy Island" hanging out from the Russian -- hanging out with the Russian pop star duo TaTu. There they are, all together, and they all have their hands up. Isn't it pleasant? You have Tattoo and Tatu, together.

GUILFOYLE: That was interesting.

GUTFELD: It is interesting.

PERINO: Congratulations to the guy who got all the tattoos.

GUTFELD: Yes, I'd like to thank Sean O'Rourke for -- I gave him an unusual mission on Monday.

You know Roger Stone has a tattoo of Nixon on his back.

WATTERS: Really?

WILLIAMS: Yes, yes.

GUTFELD: I won't tell you how I found out, but it's interesting.

GUILFOYLE: It was called your Saturday night.

GUTFELD: No. No, I watched -- it was some -- I watched a documentary.

GUILFOYLE: It is. You see it in a documentary.

GUTFELD: Yes.

WATTERS: Big weekend plans, huh, Gutfeld?

GUTFELD: You know it. All right. Up next, the real-life hunt for E.T. Glad they're going after that punk. New details about a $20 million top- secret military UFO program when we return.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

WILLIAMS: Oh, my gosh. I guess we're not alone after all. A stunning new revelation. The Pentagon reportedly set up a secret program ten years ago looking for UFOs deep in space. And newly-released video captured by U.S. Navy pilots offers an inside look at this secretive government program. Take a look.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: There's a whole fleet of them. Look.

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: My gosh.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

WILLIAMS: "My gosh" is right. I mean, who would believe? So the thing is, we don't know if this is a UFO. It could be, like, somebody's aircraft that wasn't reported. But this really gives a lot of credence to people who've been saying, "Hey, the government was hiding something from us." You're shaking your head?

GUTFELD: No, because we already know there's nothing out there because a couple of reasons. One, we have had this incredible revolution with digital cameras and smartphones. We spend all this time looking -- as a child, looking at these grainy photographs that we used to look at as kids and documentaries. Well, we don't get any more of that. And people -- everybody has a phone, and we don't see anymore.

The reason why there has been no contact is because they aren't -- they do not exist. And they don't exist, because we don't exist. We go out and we look at the lifeless orbs, these planets out there, that's what we look like to them, because this is is all a computer simulation that basically was created long ago. Those planets out there are already conquered and simulated, which is why there's only us.

WILLIAMS: Is he OK?

WATTERS: I just changed my mind. I think Greg is an alien. I think you're the alien.

WILLIAMS: Well...

GUTFELD: I am a shapeshifting lizard.

WILLIAMS: OK. Well, anyway...

GUILFOYLE: Now you're going to encourage people.

WILLIAMS: I was struck that in fact, you know, ten years, and they put 22 million bucks into this, Dana. So do you think this is a waste, or does this justify what the government was doing?

PERINO: In the scheme of things, for as much money as the government spends, I think that this is not money that was poorly spent.

I do think that it was -- it was Harry Reid, the senator from Nevada, who got this money earmarked into the DIA budget, which is a secret budget for the intelligence agencies and the Defense Department. But he had support from Senator Ted Stevens, who said, "I think we ought to look into this."

GUTFELD: Yes, why? Because he got hit by a UFO.

PERINO: No.

GUTFELD: It was an unidentified flying object.

PERINO: You mean Harry Reid?

GUTFELD: Yes.

PERINO: Yes, when he...

WATTERS: Hurt his eye.

PERINO: Yes. The exercise equipment?

GUILFOYLE: Wow.

GUTFELD: I liked that joke.

PERINO: I listened to an interview this morning with -- on "The Daily," the New York Times podcast. They interviewed the guy who just recently left his position. What was he, Ando (ph), I think his name was?

WILLIAMS: Right.

PERINO: And he says, like -- he's not saying there's for sure something out there but that it's definitely worth studying.

WILLIAMS: But Jesse, there was the video. It's not like we don't know. I mean, now you're looking at something just like the pilot, and you're saying what is that?

WATTERS: Yes, I can't identify what that is, Juan. I have no idea. But I've gone to these UFO conventions back in the day and shot "Watters' World," and people tell me stories about being abducted.

GUILFOYLE: They believe any of this?

WATTERS: They honestly believe they were abducted and things were done to them while aboard the spacecraft. And a lot of the stories share similar details. So there has to be something going on. I don't think everybody is hallucinating.

GUTFELD: No, they are. It's hypnogogic nightmares. Everybody, they're hypnogogic nightmares. When you're in sleep paralysis, and you think something is on top of you, that's a hypnogogic nightmare.

WATTERS: But I do think spending a lot of money on stuff like this has other benefits. You know? Like obviously, when the military industrial complex spends this amount of money on things, isn't that how they created the Internet? Not Al Gore.

WILLIAMS: Well, that's true.

PERINO: You never know what you might discover.

WILLIAMS: What you just said is absolutely true.

But Kimberly, I'm accustomed to sort of mocking these people as tin hat -- tinfoil hat brigade, I think they call them, or people who are just making -- you know, if you ever listen to Art Bell in the middle of the night on the radio. All these things, you think what? This guys is -- but he's entertaining. Now I'm thinking maybe there's something going on.

GUILFOYLE: Well, I mean, look, there's been enough discussion about it that it makes sense they're going to study it or figure it out. Even President Trump said he wants to know about, you know, Area 51 and the secrets of it. It was, like, a good reason to become president, right, get all the top-secret information. Just like with the JFK files.

I don't know. I mean, listen, I have an open mind about things. I also enjoy astrology.

WILLIAMS: Very nice. "One More Thing" is up next.

WATTERS: What's your sign?

GUILFOYLE: Pisces.

WATTERS: Ooh.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

GUILFOYLE: It's time now for "One More Thing" -- Greg.

GUTFELD: Thank you, Kimberly.

GUILFOYLE: You're welcome.

GUTFELD: Time for...

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

GRAPHIC: Greg's Talking Animal News

(END VIDEO CLIP)

GUTFELD: "Greg's Talking Animal News." You know, working at FOX, a lot of people send me some interesting things. I'll get something like leather socks one day, and then I'll get homemade meat the next, which I love to eat so keep sending it. And every now and then I get a talking animal. And somebody sent me a -- looks like I believe it might be a hamster. And it had an interesting message for us. Roll it.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: I'm Jesse Watters the hamster. I have 27 brothers and sisters. And my mom still hates me the most.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

GUTFELD: Yes.

WATTERS: Very good, Gutfeld.

GUTFELD: I wonder if it's somebody we know who sent that.

WATTERS: Jerry Pentacoli (ph).

GUTFELD: I don't get it. Whoever sent it is probably on some kind of power trip.

WATTERS: OK.

GUILFOYLE: It's pretty cute, though, right?

WATTERS: Very good.

GUILFOYLE: Jesse.

WATTERS: All right. So today marks the 20th anniversary of the death of one of our favorite comedians. Christopher Farley. That's right, died of a drug overdose in his apartment at age 33. You know, "SNL" guy, was along with Chris Rock, Adam Sandler, Rob Schneider, David Spade and one of my favorite movies, "Tommy Boy."

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

CHRISTOPHER FARLEY, COMEDIAN: Fat guy in a little coat. Fat guy in a little coat.

DAVID SPADE, COMEDIAN: I'm serious.

FARLEY: Richard, what's happening? Uh-oh.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

WATTERS: We all still miss him today. And he appeared in a lot of "Watters' Worlds." So thank you very much.

GUILFOYLE: Aww. Sweet, Jesse. You're touched.

WATTERS: Yes.

GUTFELD: Literally.

WATTERS: Careful.

GUILFOYLE: Juan.

WILLIAMS: You're waiting on me. All right. Visions of sugar plums dancing in your head for the holidays? Well, not so much for Luke Skywalker, a.k.a. actor Mark Hamill. He's still upset that the FCC voted last week to repeal net neutrality. He's particularly incensed that the FCC chairman, Ajit Pai, dressed up as a Jedi in a video to endorse the repeal.

Hamill tweeted at him, saying, "You are profoundly unworthy to wield a lightsaber. A Jedi you are not."

GUILFOYLE: Oh, my God.

WILLIAMS: Oh, my. The force is not with you, Mr. Chairman.

GUILFOYLE: How crazy is that?

GUTFELD: They really are picking on that guy.

WILLIAMS: They are.

GUTFELD: They're going after his family.

WILLIAMS: Remember, not only a Jedi; he dressed up as Santa.

GUTFELD: They guy -- they hate him more than they hate ISIS. It's ridiculous, these people.

GUILFOYLE: That's so nuts. OK, Dana.

PERINO: All right. So you know most babies start walking around the age of 1. But Cash Rally thought that was too easy. Check her out. So she started -- she's from Idaho. She started walking at nine months. And her parents are big outdoor enthusiasts, so they had her get on a snowboard and took it around the house, and then she hit the slopes. And she was able to do it at 1 years old.

GUTFELD: Nice.

PERINO: Check her out. Cash Rally. And they're going to try to go to Costa Rica in February and get her up on surfboard, too. So we look forward to those.

GUTFELD: No helmet?

PERINO: She's pretty good.

GUTFELD: No helmet? Oh, it's just a baby with a soft head. Yes, that's smart.

PERINO: She's pretty cute.

WATTERS: Helmets are for snowflakes.

GUTFELD: Nicely done.

GUILFOYLE: Oh, my gosh. These two, sensitivity training. OK, perfect.

So I have a book to promote. No, not one of my own, like Greg does. But one for Chris McKinley, former Navy SEAL, and Andy Simon. They have a new book out called "Enemy in the Wire." And it's perfect for anyone interested in military life, specifically. Andy grew up in a navy family. And then, as I said, Chris is one of our fearless warriors with the Navy SEALs. And it's a follow-up to Andy's first novel. "My Father's Son" is a behind-the-scenes look at the Special Ops community and what it takes to be part of that brotherhood and tells the story of one boy, of one family who has their world ripped apart by war. It's actually going to be preordered on Amazon, but it's out officially in March, just in time for my birthday. Congratulations.

WATTERS: Are we going to get some tattoos now, everybody?

GUTFELD: Yes.

PERINO: I'm in. I'm not in, no. I'll watch you guys get them, though.

WATTERS: Yes?

GUTFELD: Tattoo night. We should have a tattoo night.

GUILFOYLE: I actually think the one that makes the most sense is...

GUTFELD: Gorka?

GUILFOYLE: I think we should all get matching Gorka. Yes. Jesse, you go first.

WATTERS: OK. Where's the booze?

GUILFOYLE: Set your DVRs. Never miss an episode of "The Five." "Special Report" up next. Bret, take it away. You in?

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