TRANSCRIPT

'The Five' Fourth of July Facebook free-for-all

This is a rush transcript from "The Five," July 4, 2017. This copy may not be in its final form and may be updated.

DANA PERINO, CO-HOST: Hello everyone and Happy Birthday America.
I'm Dana Perino along with Kimberly Guilfoyle, Juan Williams, Jesse Watters, and Greg Gutfeld. It's 9 o'clock in New York City and this is "The Five."

Welcome to our July 4th Special. Thanks for joining us tonight. We have a very fun show in-store. So, make sure to stay with us throughout the hour.
Before we begin, we would like to give a very special salute to our troops and to our vets this Independence Day. We thank you for our freedom.

Tonight, we are doing something we have never done before. We are answering your questions for the entire hour. Some are serious. Some are silly. All of them are great. You posted most of them on our Facebook page and we've got them right here.

So, I am going to begin -- first question is going to go to Kimberly. This is from Robin K. She wants to know, which do you like better, watching a fireworks display, lighting your own fireworks, both, or none?

KIMBERLY GUILFOYLE, CO-HOST: How about watching a fireworks display.

PERINO: You're not like a pyromaniac.

GUILFOYLE: No. And when I was a camp fire girl, you know --

PERINO: Like me.

GUILFOYLE: Yes. Like yourself. Like yourself.

GREG GUTFELD, CO-HOST: And me.

(LAUGHTER)

I don't talk about it, though.

GUILFOYLE: We accept everyone. I didn't ever liked to light matches or do anything like that. I never did until I was in college.

GUTFELD: You never lit a match until college? That is insane! That is insane!

GUILFOYLE: But also --

GUTFELD: What is wrong with matches? Have you ever had a birthday cake?

JESSE WATTERS, CO-HOST: You don't play with as a child, Gutfeld.

GUTFELD: I don't call matches a toy.

GUILFOYLE: And I was also never a smoker. There was really no need.

GUTFELD: So, you had no need for one of the greatest inventions ever.

GUILFOYLE: Right. And I also catch on fire a lot, that is a problem.
Three times so far.

GUTFELD: Really?

PERINO: How?

GUILFOYLE: It must have been the hairspray. It leads to my hair catching on fire, literally, three times.

PERINO: Got to be careful then.

GUILFOYLE: Exactly. So, stay away from matches.

PERINO: What about -- would you, I know you live in the city so you probably watch fireworks, but would you prefer to like them if you could?

GUTFELD: I would prefer that I would like them because watching something with other people bores me. I don't want to share my pleasure with other people. I prefer to light my own --

WATTERS: The feeling is mutual.

GUTFELD: Yes.

(LAUGHTER)

GUTFELD: I prefer to be in a garage lighting these little snakes.

PERINO: Oh, I love snakes. We put them on bricks.

GUTFELD: Yes. Somehow, I identify with them.

PERINO: Do they still have those?

WATTERS: I probably wouldn't be allowed to play with you as a child.

(LAUGHTER)

WATTERS: Don't go over to Gutfeld's house. That kid is troubled.

GUILFOYLE: That still holds true.

PERINO: Do you light fireworks for your children?

WATTERS: Not for my children. I tried to keep them inside when I do the fireworks. Because again that is dangerous. But we used to have Roman candles back in the day, where you shoot the Roman candles at each other.

PERINO: That is not a good idea. Do not try this at home.

GUILFOYLE: Jesse still has the same common sense approach.

WATTERS: That is right.

PERINO: Juan, what is your tradition? Do you like to go to a fireworks display?

JUAN WILLIAMS, CO-HOST: Yes. I love fireworks. In fact, I made a big deal out of it. I mean, I don't know, I remember recently I was on the roof of the Canadian Embassy, right there on constitution, you know?

PERINO: Yes.

WILLIAMS: And watching the fireworks, I like now sometimes --

PERINO: How American of you. I'm just kidding. I mean, it's a great spot.

WILLIAMS: It is a great spot. But you know, if you go there by the capital, you can hear all the music. I have been in Boston for Boston pops on the Fourth of July, right there on the river, that is pretty cool. In fact, the nice thing about that as you get so many people on either side of the river bank, is spectacular celebration.

PERINO: When we were kids, mostly, we would be in New Castle, Wyoming at my grandpa's ranch for the Fourth of July, so my uncle would handle the fireworks, but often there was also a drought. So, we couldn't do much.

WILLIAMS: You know what's the difference --

PERINO: That would start a forest fire.

GUTFELD: Yes.

PERINO: I wouldn't be that person.

WILLIAMS: You know, it is such a difference between urban celebrations and rural celebrations. Like for example, I remember the first time I drove south and got to south of the border. Have you ever been there?

WATTERS: Oh, yes.

WILLIAMS: Holy smokes! They'll gave you anything --

WATTERS: No pun intended. I am telling you. Yes.

GUTFELD: That's actually a good point because the best memories about Fourth of July are trying to find a legal -- we would always go to Chinatown and San Francisco to buy our firecrackers and there's always some kid in school, some kid that was a little bit older, perhaps a little bit -
- anyway.

(LAUGHTER)

He would sell barrel bombs.

WILLIAMS: Yes. Yes.

GUTFELD: And then, the guy that stole the other stuff when you were in high school.

WILLIAMS: Oh!

GUTFELD: He was a capitalist in fifth grade.

WILLIAMS: Would you call them barrel bombs --

GUTFELD: Bombs. M80s.

WILLIAMS: So, in Brooklyn they would call them trash cans. And it would just -- boom!

GUTFELD: Cherry bombs.

WILLIAMS: Yes, man.

PERINO: I didn't like that. Kimberly and I didn't do that.

WATTERS: So, you can't light up fireworks in Brooklyn or because everyone is going to think it is not fireworks.

WILLIAMS: No, but these days --

GUILFOYLE: And also, to keep them after, the Fire Department will come to your house if you start the fireworks.

PERINO: I don't even like those things that snaps?

WILLIAMS: Yes. Yes. That is fake, Dana.

(LAUGHTER)

GUTFELD: You know, the party favors you get? You know what is the best thing about Fourth of July is the smell of wet fireworks in a bucket? It is -- or just smells great. If they can turn that into a pizza topping, I would eat it.

WILLIAMS: So, you know what comes to my mind? Is, if you are driving home, both in New York City, but also, Washington, D.C. where I live now, after the fireworks, you come to some neighborhoods and it looks like it is just smoke-filled. You think -- and you realize, there are people in the streets putting up so many fireworks.

GUTFELD: That is weed, Juan.

WILLIAMS: No, no, no. I can smell the difference between weed and fireworks. This is fireworks.

PERINO: Okay. So, this is a question that, Greg and I are not going to answer it because we do not have children. So, it's going to be these three, we'll start with you Jesse, from Rachel L, do you have any traditions that you have done since you were a child that you have passed down to your children?

WATTERS: Oh, God! That's a good one. Not fireworks. I think that is little too dangerous.

GUTFELD: Do they wear the collars up?

(LAUGHTER)

WATTERS: So, that is a tradition that everybody wants stopped.

(LAUGHTER)

WATTERS: We cut that out. Gosh, what do we do? What did I pass on? My sister, for Christmas, makes this really good cake. And I think she calls it.

PERINO: Cake.

(LAUGHTER)

WATTERS: What is it called? It's called -- I don't even think I can say it on TV. Icebox cake.

PERINO: Okay.

WATTERS: And yes, she makes that and it is very easy to make.

PERINO: On the Fourth of July?

GUILFOYLE: What's that like?

WATTERS: No, no, no, it's not on the Fourth of July.

PERINO: I've never heard of it.

WATTERS: I am assuming it's a Fourth of July.

WILLIAMS: Oh, my gosh! Wow!

PERINO: Jesse, Jesse, turn around, behind you.

WATTERS: What day is it?

PERINO: Fourth of July.

WATTERS: No, I don't have any fourth.

PERINO: Right. How about you, Juan?

(LAUGHTER)

WILLIAMS: You know, I think fireworks are pretty cool.

WATTERS: Yes.

WILLIAMS: And I really like making a big deal about where we're going to watch fireworks tonight. You try to get the best view in Washington because it is a spectacular display.

PERINO: Yes.

WILLIAMS: Also, New York City. Now, I have never seen this but everyone tells me, it is the biggest in the nation, right on the river here in New York.

PERINO: Always the big show. Kimberly, how about you?

GUILFOYLE: Two nights on Fourth of July parades out in the Hamptons like Sag Harbor in Southamptons are really nice, everybody loves to see.

WATTERS: Tough one, AG.

GUTFELD: Did we do the crosshair?

(LAUGHTER)

GUILFOYLE: And I believe I gave the same answer, wonderfully consistent.

GUTFELD: I want to weigh in here about something that I hate about July 4th. Why does it have to be on the fourth? Why not just designate the first Monday of July so we can have a three-day weekend instead, we all going to come back and work on Monday, and then we get Tuesday off. Why don't we do like they do with Thanksgiving which is always, what it is, Thursday?

PERINO: Yes. But the Fourth of July really isn't about you having a day off. It's about celebrating the founding of the nation.

GUTFELD: Yes, it is. No, that is how I celebrate the founding of a nation with a three-day weekend. But, you know, you have to go back to work on Monday. Just make it the first Monday of July, no matter what.

WATTERS: And while we are at it, can we do that Monday after the Super Bowl, also?

GUTFELD: Yes.

WILLIAMS: You know what? One of my favorites Fourth of July, was the night before Fourth of July, when my kids were pretty young, we went to see the movie "Independence Day." Have you ever seen that movie, where the aliens are attacking Americans, the jets, and we are fighting, and we are beating the aliens? And so, we, by the time the movie was over, it was after midnight, and the little guys are like, you know, bug-eyed because they are overtired. It was like, for me, one of the most spectacular independent states --

PERINO: I love how lovely and sentimental you are.

WATTERS: We had a tradition at my house growing up on July 3rd, it was called July 3rd eve. We would all wait for -- I think it was called fireworks clause to come down the chimney and deliver our fireworks.

GUILFOYLE: Is this made up?

PERINO: Kimberly, you're going to help us keep this going. Because question three is from Kat P. She wants to know for you preference, beach or mountain vacation? What do you prefer?

GUILFOYLE: Okay.

PERINO: Guys?

WATTERS: I mean, really? We have to answer this?

GUILFOYLE: Is a mountain camping?

PERINO: No, you could be in a hotel in the mountain?

GUILFOYLE: Where?

PERINO: Like Deer Valley.

WATTERS: Is there a spa in the mountain?

GUILFOYLE: Okay. It is definitely going to be beach.

PERINO: Okay.

GUILFOYLE: That is where I get engaged the most. Yes. Beaches.

PERINO: Okay. Are we looking for that this year?

GUILFOYLE: No.

PERINO: Beach vacation plan.

GUILFOYLE: Beach vacation. Yes.

PERINO: Okay. Okay. Good. Good. Juan, beach or mountains?

WILLIAMS: Oh my God!

PERINO: You're going to vote, right?

WILLIAMS: I do occasionally, but I mean, there is no question, the water just cools me, and I love water.

PERINO: You really do need to --

GUILFOYLE: You like tropical vacations.

WILLIAMS: I love tropical vacations.

WATTERS: Have you been camping, Juan, ever, in your life?

WILLIAMS: You know, this is a funny question, Jesse. Because after I got married and there's a point of contention with my wife to this day. She says we went to the Poconos. And I always think, why do you say that to people? It sounds like I'm such a, you know -- but anyway, we actually did go.

WATTERS: You honeymooned in the Poconos?

WILLIAMS: Well, we just got married and went to see my parents in Brooklyn. But the funny part of this is, so we made arrangements to go camping in the Poconos.

WATTERS: Yes.

WILLIAMS: So, I go up there and the guy says, well, where is your camping equipment? And I thought being a city boy, oh, don't you provide the equipment? I didn't think I was coming, a knapsack and equipment. So, we ended up --

GUILFOYLE: Knapsack.

(LAUGHTER)

WILLIAMS: We ended up in a hotel.

PERINO: We would vacation well together.

WILLIAMS: There you go.

PERINO: And I like it because bugs don't bother you.

WILLIAMS: Yes.

GUILFOYLE: Have you ever been on a vacation with like big bugs?

PERINO: How about you Greg, do you like beaches or mountains?

GUTFELD: I like to combine. I sometimes will camp on the beach.

PERINO: Oh!

GUTFELD: Sometimes, I'll go to the mountains wearing nothing but a speedo and I will crawl into a hollowed out log and cry silently until somebody sends help.

GUILFOYLE: Well, you do that on Sixth Avenue.

WATTERS: That is why I don't go camping.

(LAUGHTER)

GUTFELD: I just like to hike with very little on. I have a walking stick and a speedo and I search for tadpoles.

WATTERS: Let me know if you run into Hillary.

PERINO: Okay. This is going to be -- this is a tough question for me to answer. So, I'm not going to go first. We'll start with Jesse. Alan G wants to know, if you were stranded on a desert island and could choose one album or CD, what would it be?

WATTERS: Not country, Dana.

PERINO: Okay.

WATTERS: Sorry to disappoint.

PERINO: That's okay. That's okay.

WATTERS: Let's see. Let's see. Probably greatest hits from the '80s. Do they have something like that? 80s hits.

PERINO: Sure. Okay. 80s hit. Yes, of course you could.

WATTERS: All right.

PERINO: You can go with that.

WILLIAMS: Wait a minute. You're a young guy? 80s hits?

WATTERS: What do you want, 90s?

WILLIAMS: No, no, I just thought it would be like, you know, 2,000s.

GUILFOYLE: No, I think that matches his personality profile actually. Are you going to like Lionel Richie?

WILLIAMS: I like Lionel Richie but no, I think I would pick Bob Marley.

WATTERS: Hmm.

PERINO: On an island.

WATTERS: On an island, Juan.

WILLIAMS: Hey, hey, hey.

GUILFOYLE: All right. Abba.

PERINO: "Dancing Queen."

GUILFOYLE: Yes, fantastic.

PERINO: Obviously, you have a good answer for this.

GUTFELD: Well, I mean, basically, the question says, what is your favorite album? Every day does their desert island kind of thing, it's like, that weighs a lot of time, just say, what is your favorite album?

PERINO: Okay, what is your favorite album?

GUTFELD: I don't know. Yes. I would say "Songs the Lord Taught Us" by
The Cramps. One of the greatest albums of all time.

WILLIAMS: I got to go listen now because you really know music.

GUTFELD: Psycho rockabilly. It's fantastic.

WILLIAMS: But I think the heart of this question Greg is, something you wouldn't get tired of listening to.

GUTFELD: I play that album every day.

WILLIAMS: Come on!

GUTFELD: Yes.

WILLIAMS: You're making it up. Right?

PERINO: I don't know. Well, this has been a great start to our Facebook Friday holiday type of thing.

All right. Coming up, we'll answer the best political questions you guys sent in. There are some really good ones. So, stay with us.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

WILLIAMS: Welcome back to our Facebook Fourth of July special. We are answering your questions. And we will going to answer them throughout the hour. They came from you. So, stay with us.

Let's take a look at some of the best political questions that you sent.
Number one, if you could have been Vice President to any American president, who would you choose? KG.

GUILFOYLE: Oh, Ronald Reagan!

WILLIAMS: Oh, yes.

GUILFOYLE: Thank you for coming to me first. Juan has to make up another answer.

WILLIAMS: Oh, no.

(LAUGHTER)

GUILFOYLE: That would have been taken.

WILLIAMS: You know what, let me just tell you, so if you had been in a press conference with Ronald Reagan --

GUILFOYLE: Yes.

WILLIAMS: You would have been the first person called upon because you are in a red dress and he had a weakness for red dresses.

GUILFOYLE: Oh!

PERINO: There is your trivia for the night. If I had better timing I could go back in a time machine.

WILLIAMS: A time machine. Well, you know, he loved Nancy but I am sure he would have been fascinated. Jesse?

PERINO: Sure.

WATTERS: Thank you, Juan. I would be the vice president for Martin Van Buren.

GUTFELD: Nice.

WILLIAMS: Oh, yes. Explain.

WATTERS: I don't know.

(LAUGHTER)

WILLIAMS: Well, I'm sure you would have been quite a character in that period.

WATTERS: Yes. I'm quite a character now.

WILLIAMS: That is true. I didn't mean anything by it. Yes.

GUILFOYLE: Full time character.

WILLIAMS: What about you, Dana?

PERINO: I would have to say George Washington.

WILLIAMS: Now, why is that?

PERINO: Because I have always loved him. And I would have liked to have gotten to know him. I mean, history, perhaps, portrays him as something greater even than he was in person but I do think that he was quite a remarkable person. I would have loved to have helped.

WILLIAMS: Father of our nation. Gregory?

GUTFELD: Richard Nixon. Just because no one would --

PERINO: A chance of getting to be president?

(LAUGHTER)

GUTFELD: Yes. Exactly. And I'll tell you, he wouldn't expect much of me.
I would step in, kind of hang out.

WATTERS: Yes. He's not Nixon.

GUTFELD: Yes.

GUILFOYLE: Be there with a walking stick.

GUTFELD: Exactly. I would change the world and I would have prevented a President Carter.

WILLIAMS: Yes.

GUTFELD: From being re-elected. There would have been no Carter. The American rebirth would have happened sooner.

WATTERS: That is a shock.

GUTFELD: Then, there wouldn't have been a Ronald Reagan because I would have been so great. I would have been elected for a third term.

WILLIAMS: Wait, you could have been agno, you know?

GUTFELD: Yes.

WILLIAMS: Yes. You could have been agno and then you would have been gone.

GUTFELD: That is true.

WILLIAMS: That could have been the alternative.

PERINO: What about you, Juan?

WILLIAMS: You know, I think, I was thinking about this and for the Democrats, you know, I think FDR, obviously, is to my mind, the game changer in terms of presidents who, Democratic presidents who made history.
But I also think it would have been fun to be Bill Clinton or Barack Obama.

WATTERS: Yes. It would have been fun to be Bill.

WILLIAMS: Because Al Gore got so angry at him for his screw-ups. And Al Gore feels like he got ripped off by the President. So, if Al Gore had been able to prevent Bill Clinton, boy, what a different track we would have been as a country.

WATTERS: That is true.

WILLIAMS: Yes.

WATTERS: That is true.

WILLIAMS: All right. Question number two, we will going to go the other way this time. If the founding fathers came back today, Gregory, what do you think their opinion would be of our current government situation?

GUTFELD: I think they would say, hey, this is working out pretty well.

(LAUGHTER)

I mean, it's 241 years. I bet -- maybe it goes ten, 20 years.

(LAUGHTER)

Holy damn. And it's like, and then it will be like the Second Amendment, working out pretty well for everybody. We weren't sure that everybody but now this place is great because they can protect each other, and everybody respects each other, kind of, because of the Second Amendment. And the First Amendment is still around. They are going like, dude, we did pretty well! And they high five and they wouldn't even know how to high five but they feel the urge to high five just because they did such a great job.
And then, we would go out, we go bar hopping and I would pay for all their drinks.

WILLIAMS: No, that was a lot of drinking.

WATTERS: That's a lot of ale.

GUILFOYLE: A lot of stream of consciousness.

GUTFELD: I would give them powder for their legs. Among other things.

WILLIAMS: Introduce them to a couple of chicks in Times Square.

(LAUGHTER)

GUILFOYLE: This is an awesome segment.

WILLIAMS: Dana --

PERINO: Well, I think that the question kind of leads you to think, would they be disappointed because we are at each other's throats? But actually, way back when, they actually were at each other's throats.

GUTFELD: Yes.

PERINO: So, I think that they would think, wow, and I agree that 241 years, like you can't really conceive of that now.

WILLIAMS: Yes.

PERINO: What the world would look like. So, I think if they thought it was still standing, that we were the best country that the world that ever known --

GUTFELD: And it's because of them.

PERINO: Yes.

GUTFELD: It's because of them.

PERINO: That is brilliant.

GUTFELD: Yes.

PERINO: And they were very young. You look back and you think, because they had the powdered wigs, they looked older. But honestly at 35 or so, that they had such wisdom. I think that is amazing.

GUTFELD: You had that wisdom at 35 --

PERINO: You're going to die.

GUTFELD: Yes. Your lifespan was pretty short.

WATTERS: Jesse?

WATTERS: Yes. I don't have anything really that provocative didn't really say like Greg or that interesting like Dana. I mean, they probably watch TV.

(LAUGHTER)

They'd probably like to play video games. You know, I don't know. Maybe shoot an AR-15. I don't really think they would think about it too much.

WILLIAMS: You don't think they would think about it?

WATTERS: No, I think, you know, we did a nice job, the fake news media is still running wild. And that is about it.

GUILFOYLE: I would say, they'd be a little bit surprised to be honest about the way things are.

WILLIAMS: Yes.

GUILFOYLE: But I would think they would be quite excited that the constitution and everything has held up as it has.

WILLIAMS: I agree. And that is what Greg said too.

GUILFOYLE: Yes. I mean, I think that that would really be the headline of it. Probably surprises some of the things that have gone on in the world.

PERINO: But also because the idea of the country was founded on that God provides inalienable rights to all of us and that America has held true to that and that we have not gone after countries for, we've not started wars where we are trying to get other people's blood and treasure, we are actually just trying to provide liberty, and I think that they would be proud of that.

WILLIAMS: A beacon of democracy. I would agree. And this is going to be able to -- but I wrote a book on this very topic and I came to the same conclusion that Greg and Kimberly did, which is that they would be stunned that it still exists. There constitution that it has not been messed with.
We have amendments. But they built in. That structured allowing for some flexibility. But I gave a little talk in which I say, you know, if they showed up right here on Sixth Avenue, they say, hey, what is all these surveillance? What are these cameras on the street lights? How can you guys let the government --

PERINO: How about the IRS? They wouldn't be happy about the IRS.

WATTERS: I think that they're more worried about getting hit by a taxi.

WILLIAMS: Well, it might be on Sixth Avenue. They wouldn't be happy with the -- they would think that we have too much military. And, you know, why do we have troops overseas permanently? They would not be happy with that.
They have lots of gay marriage, a woman running for president?

PERINO: But you can't judge them about gay marriage back in the 1776.

GUILFOYLE: And developments over time and they would have to respond --

WILLIAMS: Yes. But that is the genius of the constitution of the founding fathers.

GUILFOYLE: Yes. Right.

WILLIAMS: Directly ahead, if you are not hungry now, baby, you will be soon. Kimberly is going to lead us through the best Fourth of July food
options. Stay tuned.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

MARIANNE RAFFERTY, FOX NEWS ANCHOR: This is a FOX News alert. I'm Marianne Rafferty in Los Angeles. A show of force by the U.S. and South Korea in direct response to that latest missile launch by North Korea. The U.S. Eighth Army in South Korean unit firing deep strikes precision missiles into South Korean territory on waters. The missile firings intended to demonstrate US/South Korean solidarity. The U.S. now confirming North Korea did launch an intercontinental ballistic missile earlier today, and that missile has a potential of hitting Alaska.

Secretary of State Rex Tillerson saying it represents a new escalation of the global threat posed by North Korea. Tillerson also saying, the U.S.
will never accept a new nuclear armed North Korea. U.S. ambassador to the United Nations Nikki Haley will raise U.S. concerns at an emergency meeting at the U.N. Security Council tomorrow.

I am Marianne Rafferty. Now, back to "The Five", Fourth of July Special.

GUILFOYLE: Welcome back. And Happy Fourth of July. The holiday best known for flag, fireworks and of course, food, my favorite. Let's take a look at the top food questions that we have received on Facebook.

PERINO: Hmm.

GUTFELD: Hmm.

PERINO: Good question.

GUILFOYLE: Greg, let me begin with you because this is the only food that you consume.

GUTFELD: Yes. It's true!

GUILFOYLE: What is your drink of choice? Meaning, alcohol.

GUTFELD: Well, first of all, you know, Fourth of July is everyday somewhere. So you should be able to eat like this every day. And that's what I do. I always have ribs. I always have barbecue and food. That's all I eat every day and I am pretty low cholesterol for now. My favorite drink is --

GUILFOYLE: Yes. I know what it is.

GUTFELD: Well, it's either a red wine, which is quite good --

GUILFOYLE: That's your number one.

GUTFELD: -- good for your heart. But when I'm feeling in a tropical mood I would have a Dark and Stormy --

GUILFOYLE: Those are good, aren't they?

GUTFELD: -- with Gosling rum, ginger beer, angostura bitters and just a slice of lime. I make an excellent version.

GUILFOYLE: I would love to try one of those. I recently just tried one --

GUTFELD: Well, I happen to be free later, Kimberly.

WILLIAMS: Oh my god.

(LAUGHTER)

GUTFELD: I'd love to make you a Dark and Stormy. We'll have a Dark and night.

GUILFOYLE: For me it would be.

(LAUGHTER)

PERINO: Call me if you need a rescue.

GUILFOYLE: Yes. Keep your phone on. OK, Dana, Linda's question. What's your great alcohol?

PERINO: Well, so in the summertime, my friend Ingrid has made me -- she drinks this concoction of ros,, like a sparkling water, ice, and she makes a really tall glass. And so, she calls it summer water.

GUILFOYLE: But wait, is it just straight up like a --

PERINO: It's just ros, and then water.

GUILFOYLE: She doesn't blend it like the --

PERINO: No. I am dying to try.

GUTFELD: It's called cheap wine.

(LAUGHTER)

PERINO: I'm trying to, well, it's not cheap really what she makes, you know, that

GUTFELD: But she's watering down ros,.

PERINO: Yes because that way you can drink --

GUTFELD: More.

PERINO: -- it looks like you're drinking more but you're not really drinking more alcohol.

GUTFELD: They do that in bars.

WATTERS: -- if you have a problem. It's illegal.

(LAUGHTER)

GUILFOYLE: Guys, that's the same thing as like a white wine spritzer.

PERINO: Yes, it's just like that.

GUILFOYLE: It's like a ros, spritzer.

PERINO: So, that's my drink of choice this summer. But I'm dying to try that fros,, so maybe one night we can go do that after the show.

GUTFELD: Summer water sounds like the name of a stripper.

(LAUGHTER)

PERINO: In the name of my drink. What a coincidence.

GUILFOYLE: Really? This is a family celebration. OK, Jesse, maybe you can
-- probably not. All right.

PERINO: Juan, no wait --

WATTERS: Favorite alcohol? I like it all. I really like Moscow Mule, that's my drink of choice. It has been my drink of choice for the last two years straight, but I'm still going strong.

PERINO: In the summer and winter?

WATTERS: Yes. I don't discriminate.

GUTFELD: I don't like that they put it in a solid --

GUILFOYLE: Copper cups.

GUTFELD: Copper cup.

WATTERS: See, I like that.

GUTFELD: I don't because I taste the copper.

GUILFOYLE: That's the whole point.

GUTFELD: To taste the copper?

PERINO: That's in your mind.

WATTERS: You might have to get a better cup.

(LAUGHTER)

GUTFELD: I need a clear glass for your drink. You don't put it in a solid
-- it's bad.

GUILFOYLE: But then it's not a Moscow Mule.

GUTFELD: You can do whatever you want.

GUILFOYLE: By the way, you would probably like it because it has like the ginger in it --

GUTFELD: Yes.

GUILFOYLE: -- it's got vodka, lime. So, one time on Amazon I saw they had those cups for sale, and I wanted to make this at home.

WATTERS: Yes.

GUILFOYLE: But then nothing else happens.

PERINO: So you buy them?

GUILFOYLE: Yes, I have to get the other ingredients.

(LAUGHTER)

PERINO: I like the idea.

(CROSSTALK)

GUTFELD: Kimberly, talk to William Devane. He can get you copper at a great price.

GUILFOYLE: I love him. Oh my god. He's the best, isn't he? OK, Juanito.

WILLIAMS: Well, I mean, I love tequila. I just drink tequila like when I know it's party time --

GUILFOYLE: What kind of tequila do you like?

WILLIAMS: Well, this, I mean Patr n is terrific.

GUILFOYLE: But silver you like, like the blanco?

WILLIAMS: Yes, and there are all kinds of reserves. There' like, well, I won't get into it because it is advertising, but they're just wonderful tequilas. But the thing about it, lately, if I'm going out to dinner, I'll have like a Martini, you know, and that's pretty good. I like Grey Goose, Belvedere and those kind of things.

PERINO: You also like really like beer.

WILLIAMS: Yes, but I today is Fourth of July show guys and beer is like the official alcohol of the Fourth of July. And everybody at a picnic is going over the cooler and grabbing a cold one.

GUILFOYLE: OK, I'm trying to see one more for this. I like tequila too.
Casamigos and (INAUDIBLE)

WILLIAMS: That Casamigos just made George Clooney a billion dollars.

GUILFOYLE: Call me George. All right, so how about this. From Matt T., Juan, if it is past supper -- because I know you like to eat like I do, well, three of us do --

WILLIAMS: Yes.

(LAUGHTER)

GUILFOYLE: What do you want to eat? What's your snack? If you're like, oh god, it's a little bit late?

PERINO: Like after the show because it's like late.

GUILFOYLE: Which are like now every day.

WILLIAMS: The problem is I like ice cream.

GUILFOYLE: You do like ice cream.

WATTERS: That's not a problem, Juan.

GUTFELD: It is for somebody.

GUILFOYLE: Right, Jesse, what do you eat? You eat everything. It's like garbage can metabolism.

(LAUGHTER)

WATTERS: You know what I like to eat late at night is cereal. I'll have cereal late at night --

WILLIAMS: Lots of Cap'n Crunch.

WATTERS: Yes, whatever I can get my hands on.

GUILFOYLE: What about DP?

PERINO: I'll have a ros, -- I don't usually eat after the show because --

(LAUGHTER)

PERINO: This one time we were at one of the conventions, I had to work really late and then afterwards one of our colleagues said, would you like to go for a drink afterwards? So I said, sure. But I had to wait so long to join her and then they were bringing alcohol and I thought, I really need to eat or else, you know, I'll get sick.

But when they brought the food over, the menu and a platter, she said, "Oh, no thanks. We work in television. We don't eat after midnight."

WILLIAMS: Oh no, she embarrassed --

PERINO: And I was like, oh, right, we don't eat after midnight, right. But I was so hungry.

GUILFOYLE: You were so hungry.

PERINO: Sometimes, I'll have a cup of yogurt before bed.

GUILFOYLE: Is that?

PERINO: Yes, I knew it.

GUILFOYLE: I'm so good. All right, secret.

GUTFELD: I go for the spiciest late-night food I can find because it gives you amazing dreams. Do you ever go to bed after eating spicy food? You can actually have lucid dreams that are mind-blowing. Just incredible. You don't even need VR with spicy food. It's a Thai food. That will do the trick.

WILLIAMS: VR?

PERINO: Virtual reality.

GUILFOYLE: Past summer, I like to make one of my highly acclaimed and delicious pepperoni quesadillas.

PERINO: Oh, wait.

GUILFOYLE: Yes, 20 seconds in the microwave. You put a little tortilla, a piece of cheddar cheese and then you make a little (INAUDIBLE) pepperoni and snack on it.

PERINO: Is that Ronan's favorite?

GUILFOYLE: People love it. Yes.

PERINO: I love it. I feel like one right now. When we return, it's a wild card round led by Greg. Stay with us.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

GUTFELD: Welcome back to our Fourth of July special where we're answering the questions you sent in on Facebook. The category for this round of questions, potpourri, a word I don't like because the T is silent.

PERINO: Why is that?

GUTFELD: Well, I have no idea, but it should be --.

PERINO: T's are -- they shouldn't be silent.

GUTFELD: There should be --

PERINO: -- because T is a strong letter.

GUTFELD: There has to be a pot dispensary called potpourri somewhere. I would imagine. All right, first question, let's start with you, Dana. From Edana F., "If you had to spend 100 days on an island without any technology and you take one person with you who is not a spouse or relative, who would it be and why?" And you can already take your pets, so don't worry about that.

PERINO: I would take my sister, Angie. She is a lot of good fun.

GUTFELD: But she's not -- she's not a relative?

PERINO: Oh, so no relatives? All right, I'll take Kimberly.

GUTFELD: OK.

GUILFOYLE: I'm not a company. (ph)

PERINO: She's great company. She's funny. She can make a pepperoni quesadilla.

GUTFELD: There's no microwave, no technology! Listen to the questions people!

WATTERS: She doesn't even know how to use a match s she's not making a fire.

(LAUGHTER)

GUTFELD: Look, let me give you the --

GUILFOYLE: I never knew how to open a bottle of wine either, but there seems to be people around that likes to help me.

GUTFELD: Let me give you the answer. It's Mike Rowe.

PERINO: OK, like if you mean --

GUTFELD: Could we just skip this question?

GUILFOYLE: Why are you so jealous? You don't like the cheap --

GUTFELD: No, it's Mike Rowe. He's somebody who could survive.

WILLIAMS: I guess if its survival is the thing, you want the Rock or somebody like that. You could really --

GUTFELD: He's an actor.

WILLIAMS: You don't think he's really strong?

(CROSSTALK)

PERINO: Who won "Survivor"? Pick that person.

GUILFOYLE: -- to do stuff. You think of rescue.

GUTFELD: Somebody's got to chop wood and then design --

PERINO: Oh, Elisabeth Hasselbeck. She was on "Survivor."

WATTERS: I'm going to go with that.

(LAUGHTER)

WATTERS: Kill two birds with one stone

GUTFELD: I don't even know what that means.

GUILFOYLE: And she's very sweet and she would pray for you too for safety.

PERINO: Yes.

GUTFELD: Yes. I guess I would choose like -- no, I'd have to choose somebody that -- because I have no technical --

PERINO: No skills.

GUTFELD: -- no labor skills.

(CROSSTALK)

PERINO: But you could really write a good essay about it.

GUTFELD: You know what, I would bring an optometrist. I'd bring an optometrist. If my glasses broke and I am on an island, I am screwed. So I would have an optometrist.

WILLIAMS: He doesn't have any machines.

GUTFELD: He would build one. If he's worth his salt, optometrist on an island.

WILLIAMS: You bring Ben Franklin. Ben Franklin, Fourth of July. Bring Ben Franklin.

GUILFOYLE: -- re-read the same book over and over again?

GUTFELD: Did you -- that would be fun. Did you pick somebody?

GUILFOYLE: You would be perfect like the Tom Hanks guy. Did I pick somebody?

GUTFELD: A volleyball head?

GUILFOYLE: I would probably -- I don't know exactly. I would probably pick an entertaining man.

(LAUGHTER)

GUTFELD: There you go. I know where you're going with it.

GUILFOYLE: No.

GUTFELD: Stop picking on me, Jesse.

WATTERS: I'm sorry.

GUTFELD: It's Fourth of July.

WATTERS: I can't help it.

GUILFOYLE: He's upset because he wanted someone to choose him. That's the thing. He's upset because Dana chose me.

WATTERS: I actually going to choose Gutfeld.

GUTFELD: This is an interesting question. I'm starting with you.

WATTERS: Yes.

GUTFELD: This is from Maureen T., "If you had the ability to perceive the future in one year, would you rather see your future or someone else's, and if it's someone else, who would that person be?

WATTERS: I mean, obviously my own future.

(LAUGHTER)

GUILFOYLE: Don't be so selfish.

WATTERS: I mean, come on, everybody is scared (ph), and it would help other people too to know what I'm doing.

GUTFELD: Yes, what if you're not there? Would that creep you out?

WATTERS: Yes, then that's the exact part. Thanks for that dark premonition. Are you planning anything?

(LAUGHTER)

WATTERS: That's why you're not coming on my island.

(LAUGHTER)

WATTERS: -- roast me.

GUILFOYLE: You could make a pepperoni quesadilla in the sun because it's warm enough and it would melt the cheese.

WATTERS: Are we still talking about the island?

GUTFELD: Juan?

GUILFOYLE: I know but I'm just thinking. It wouldn't have to be that hot.

GUTFELD: Juan, to see the future, you are somebody you know?

WILLIAMS: Well, can you change the future?

PERINO: No, you can just see it.

WATTERS: Let's not over think this Juan.

PERINO: (INAUDIBLE) said you can only see it.

WILLIAMS: You can only see it.

GUTFELD: Yes.

WILLIAMS: Well, obviously I have children, so, I'd love to know that they're OK.

GUTFELD: There you go. See, that's a nice answer. Kimberly?

WILLIAMS: I don't know if it was nice but it was honest.

(LAUGHTER)

WATTERS: Kimberly is busy.

GUTFELD: What would you --

GUILFOYLE: It's Fourth of July. You're supposed to be celebrating.

GUTFELD: Yes, who would you rather -- would you rather see your future or someone else's in a year?

GUILFOYLE: I probably like to see someone else's future.

GUTFELD: Yes. Anybody in particular?

GUILFOYLE: I don't know. No, I can already predict that.

(LAUGHTER)

GUILFOYLE: Maybe my sons. That will be nice to know, you know, you want to know if he'll be okay and everything.

PERINO: Like champion soccer player.

GUILFOYLE: Yes. Lacrosse or something.

GUTFELD: Dana?

PERINO: Did I not answer it earlier?

GUTFELD: I don't think, no, I went to Jesse.

PERINO: I don't want to see my future.

(LAUGHTER)

PERINO: I just trust.

GUTFELD: Yes?

PERINO: Yes.

GUTFELD: I don't want to see my future, you know --

PERINO: I'll tell you whose future I want to see, Bashar al-Assad. Does he stay or go?

WILLIAMS: That could be depressing if the answer is he's staying around.

GUTFELD: Yes.

PERINO: Well at least we'd know then what to do.

GUTFELD: I don't care with seeing my future. It probably wouldn't be very exciting. I'll just be sitting here doing Facebook questions.

(LAUGHTER)

GUTFELD: And on that note, and it was an upbeat note, America, because I'm here for you. Ahead, we select the next round of questions specifically for the randomness. Things will get interesting after this quick break.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

WATTERS: Welcome back. Happy Fourth of July. Continuing now with answers to the questions you sent in through Facebook. The next category, more random ones.

(LAUGHTER)

WATTERS: All right, my first question is from Scott w. and this goes to Dana Perino.

PERINO: OK.

WATTERS: "If you could put one person on a rocket to Mars, who would it be and why?

GUILFOYLE: Don't answer that --

PERINO: Jesse Watters.

WATTERS: And it can't be me. Oh, you beat me to it.

(LAUGHTER)

WATTERS: And it can't be Bashar al-Assad

PERINO: One person to Mars, well, I think I would send my brother-in-law, Ben, because he loves space so much and he is so into it and very interested. I'm assuming they get to go and look around and come back.

WATTERS: So you assumed that, that was not assumed.

GUTFELD: No, it's one way. Nice try.

GUILFOYLE: I didn't assume that. I think it's (INAUDIBLE).

WATTERS: Greg Gutfeld, who would you send?

GUTFELD: Somebody extremely old.

PERINO: Oh, how about the guy, no, what about the guy (INAUDIBLE)?

GUTFELD: Because if they --

(LAUGHTER)

GUTFELD: He's a lawyer. I would say, yes, somebody old in case they don't come back. So they've had a full life.

WATTERS: You are dark. There's a dark thing (ph) in you.

GUTFELD: No, no, no, because if you go to Mars right now, you're not coming back. So, it's some guy's who's had a full life.

WATTERS: I would send a baby. KG?

(LAUGHTER)

GUILFOYLE: I would send Kim.

GUTFELD: Who?

WATTERS: Kim Kardashian?

GUILFOYLE: No, Kim Jong-Un.

WATTERS: Oh, OK. Got it. Or Kim Kardashian, just kidding. I love you.
Juan, what do you got.

GUILFOYLE: Oh my god.

WILLIAMS: Who would I send to Mars?

WATTERS: Yes.

WILLIAMS: I have no idea. You think Trump's available?

(LAUGHTER)

WATTERS: You put a big (INAUDIBLE)

(CROSSTALK)

WATTERS: Martians, you all owe me $20. You're in big trouble.

(LAUGHTER)

(CROSSTALK)

GUILFOYLE: "Make Mars Great Again."

WILLIAMS: "Make Mars Great Aain."

WATTERS: OK, next question. From Susan N., Kimberly Guilfoyle, "What other professional worker would you like to shadow for a day or two to see another side of life? A nurse, a police officer, a factory worker or someone not in the media? What person would you shadow?

PERINO: I know, for her.

WATTERS: Just for a day or two.

GUILFOYLE: Who?

PERINO: I think you would like to go and be like with a surgeon because you love science.

GUILFOYLE: I do, I love medicine. That would be very good.

WATTERS: Juan, who would you shadow for a day?

WILLIAMS: So, you mean like, you know, just a fascination, I'd go watch like a baseball player or a pro basketball player and see how they do it, and how they stay in shape. It would be fascinating to me. But that's the fan part of me. But I think intellectually, I would love to see an architect at work because now they use these computers and they have all these --

GUILFOYLE: You have to do CADD drawing.

WILLIAMS: Yes, it's amazing stuff.

WATTERS: Fascinating, Juan. Sounds like a blast. Dana.

(LAUGHTER)

PERINO: I would go if they would let me, with an undercover CIA agent.

WATTERS: Do you think you're allowed to do that? Is that on the list?

PERINO: This is Facebook questions.

WATTERS: You can't announce that.

GUILFOYLE: Dana is like an "zero dark thirty" kind of --

WATTERS: You would stick out like a sore thumb on a CIA ops (INAUDIBLE).
Gutfeld, who would you shadow?

GUTFELD: I would shadow any kind of generic data processor because I would just sit there most of the time and I wouldn't have to really go anywhere.
I could probably just kind of like play with my phone until it's over.

GUILFOYLE: That is so weird, something like robot oriented.

WATTERS: I'm sure the person who would be thrilled to have you sit on your phone. Gutfeld comes through again. All right, Sherry C., this is going to go right back to Gutfeld, "If you were a contestant on Jeopardy -- have you been a contestant --

GUILFOYLE: Dana was.

GUTFELD: Never.

WATTERS: -- other than political, what would be your best category?"

GUTFELD: Music. I would think music. I would also say compassion. If they have a topic called compassion, I would probably get every question right.

WATTERS: Daily Double?

GUILFOYLE: Because you would pick the opposite of what you would do.

(LAUGHTER)

GUTFELD: There is love

WATTERS: OK, what do you think would be your best category?

PERINO: I did have -- I had an opportunity to be on it, I lost. It was the most --

WATTERS: You lost at Jeopardy?

PERINO: I did.

WATTERS: Who beat you?

PERINO: David Farber of CNBC --

WATTERS: You lost to CNBC?

PERINO: -- and Kareem Abdul-Jabbar and I were close. Yes.

WATTERS: Wait, wait, did Kareem beat you?

PERINO: I think so. I was leading going into the commercial break and I totally fell apart.

(CROSSTALK)

PERINO: It was the most nervous I have ever been in my entire life.

(CROSSTALK)

PERINO: I think the category I would do well in would be like country music, for one, or like if there's Garth Brooks category, I might get that.
Also, I would be pretty good on '80s movies.

WATTERS: Eighties movies, that's a great category.

GUILFOYLE: I think I'm good on that too. That's what we did very well in charades together.

PERINO: Yes, we did. That's true.

GUILFOYLE: Yes.

GUTFELD: That movie is for people in their 80s? Like "On Golden Pond"?

WATTERS: Close -- also a movie from the '80s.

GUTFELD: It is, wasn't it -- ladies for the 80's Jack.

WATTERS: KG, what would be our category at Jeopardy, not political? Food?

GUILFOYLE: Pepperoni?

WATTERS: I have a specialty in pepperoni.

WATTERS: That's all you need (ph).

GUILFOYLE: That frequently comes up on the show. Yes, food probably be pretty good. I'd say I would dominate --

PERINO: Fashion.

GUILFOYLE: Fashion I would be great at. American political history, but that kind of involves politics.

WATTERS: We got to play within the lines, KG.

GUILFOYLE: What else? Law? Well law, can I have that or is that just too obvious?

WATTERS: No, I think we're going to allow law. Judges, we're allowing law.
Juan, what would be yours? We can actually give you politics because let's be honest, you don't know that much.

(LAUGHTER)

WILLIAMS: The thing is, I know enough to get the answers. But I would say, historical figures, if you could do that, is that political?

WATTERS: No, that's good, historical figures.

WILLIAMS: Yes, you could do historical figures or you could do like --

GUILFOYLE: That involves politics, too.

WILLIAMS: You think that's politics?

WATTERS: Maybe.

(CROSSTALK)

GUTFELD: not all historical figures are political.

WATTERS: Judges, we're going to allow it.

WILLIAMS: All right.

WATTERS: I would like to compete in the, like the high school Jeopardy. I really want to beat those high school kids. I could compete on that level.

GUILFOYLE: That's how you are.

WATTERS: That makes me feel good. Stay right there. We're going to be back with our final July Fourth thoughts.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

PERINO: Now some final thoughts on this Independence Day. We had a lot of questions from our fans. I enjoyed it. Everybody?

GUTFELD: Yes.

WATTERS: Yes we did.

PERINO: OK. Are we ready to eat some of these ribs?

WATTERS: I am. Let's start eating.

(CROSSTALK)

GUILFOYLE: And thanks to Dinosaur Barbecue. It's delicious, absolutely.

PERINO: Yes, thank Dinosaur. That's it for us. We'll see you back here tomorrow. Have a great rest of your holiday. "Hannity" is up next.

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