This is a rush transcript from "The Five," April 2, 2014. This copy may not be in its final form and may be updated.
ANDREA TANTAROS, CO-HOST: Hello, everyone. I'm Andrea Tantaros, along with Bob Beckel, Eric Bolling, Dana Perino, and Greg Gutfeld.
It's 5 o'clock in New York City and this is "The Five."
(MUSIC)
TANTAROS: We want to tell you about a real war on women. A shocking new documentary called "Honor Diaries" follows nine Muslim women who were abused and victimized by men in an archaic Muslim society.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: Anything from wearing short sleeves, using head scarves, being seen talking to a men.
UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: These things can be seen dishonorable.
UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: Thousands of women have been detained for dressing un-Islamically. Like this woman screaming as she's pushed into a police car.
UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: The honor system in Muslim majority societies is really the basis of a lot of harm that is perpetuated against women.
UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: It's systematic institutionalized misogyny.
UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: When you do dissent with what is portrayed as mainstream beliefs, you are ostracized. There are threats of murder.
There are threats of rape, physical mutilation.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
TANTAROS: If you think so called moderate Muslim rights groups in America would be supportive of this film -- well, you would be wrong. The cancel on American Islamic relations is boycotting it. They claim the producers of the film promote Islamophobia.
Here's a member of CAIR Chicago chapter talking to Megyn Kelly last night.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
AGNIESZKA KAROLUK, CAIR CHICAGO CHAPTER: We don't have a problem with the context of the film. I understand that there are women who participate in this film who are Muslim women who work on these very serious issues.
What I'm personally disgusted by as a Muslim woman, as a feminist, is that someone like the Clarion Project would take this film and use it to promote their own hate-filled agenda. That's my problem with this movie.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
TANTAROS: OK. So, Dana, CAIR is not saying that this film is not true. They're basically going after people who are --
DANA PERINO, CO-HOST: Hateful. They're calling other people hateful.
TANTAROS: They're calling them hateful for voicing the truth, basically. But CAIR says, don't worry about the truth. Let's just focus on smearing the filmmaker.
PERINO: I want to commend Megyn Kelly who was the first in primetime to air this debate, and she did well by it, winning the night last night because I think this is something that in some ways we dance around the issue. We talk about a war on women in this country, understand some people are coming from on the other side on that one, from where I stand.
But this is just the reality in many, many countries around the world.
Not all Muslim women. Remember last week, I talked about the women's initiative that the Bush Center runs where you have all the women from Egypt and Tunisia who have come over and are involved in all sorts of different sectors of the economy.
They are, however, the exception. They will be leaders in their country, but one of the things they're going to have to fight against and fight back is something we strive to do in a couple of countries and encourage moderation. But moderation on a scale to this, this is almost unfathomable in America that this is actually still happening in 2014 around the world.
TANTAROS: Greg, wouldn't CAIR be better served putting out a statement condemning these violent acts against women and really focusing on that issue instead of again, going back to smearing a filmmaker who is simply airing the truth?
GREG GUTFELD, CO-HOST: No. But, see, that would be Islamophobic. So, even if you actually point out some horrible misdeeds, you are actually the bigot by exposing their atrocities. I think they should arrest the filmmaker. They have done it before. Why not arrest this guy?
Illustrates two things, two quick points -- the folly of the American feminist who is obsessed with demonizing Hobby Lobby or people who use gender -- don't use gender free pronouns on campus. Those are evil, while ignoring truly barbaric actions.
Where the fluke is Fluke? You know what? Wherever there's a camera, she will be there. But because there are no cameras here, you can't build your career on this stuff. This is how tolerance is used as a Trojan horse to allow pernicious disgusting behavior to thrive. So, if you come out against it, you're the Islamophobe.
This woman who calls herself a feminist is disgusting.
TANTAROS: Bob, you've taking on radical Islam. It actually is an issue where I think the five of us have come together on this show. Why don't more Democrats, especially women, speak out against these terrible attacks against women which are documented? There was a "Time" magazine piece with a woman, you remember her face was cut off by the Taliban. Why aren't more Democrats speaking about this and joining with Republicans on an issue they can unite on?
BOB BECKEL, CO-HOST: Well, they should -- I mean, they all should.
So should Barack Obama.
And for some reason, I think Greg is right. You take these people on what is fact. This is not something they're making up out of whole cloth.
These are facts. You can call it Islamophobia all you want. It is true.
To me, the amazing thing is CAIR got the University of Michigan in Dearborn to shut this film down. I mean, what are we talking about here?
PERINO: Right.
BECKEL: This is a classic case of what happens in Muslim countries and we turn our back on it and we shouldn't.
TANTAROS: Even the U.N. actually Nations likes this film, Eric.
ERIC BOLLING, CO-HOST: Let me say -- it's not a film. It's a documentary. That's where the line should be drawn. CAIR should stop with this.
I'm going to pick up on something Greg said. It's really -- it's the intolerance of the Muslim religion. On one end of the tolerant spectrum, you have Christianity, Judaism. On the very opposite end of the spectrum, you have Muslim and maybe even some hateful groups.
CAIR says, now, they linked on their Web site, this Richard Silverstein is a progressive blogger, Silverstein says a Jew can't be profiled in human rights abuses against Muslim woman, he writes it, then CAIR puts it up on their Web site. So, they're basically are saying -- taking that point. So, if you're Jewish, you can't profile human rights offenses of Muslim people. This is absolutely ridiculous.
TANTAROS: Isn't that anti-Semitic?
BOLLING: There's more intolerance. Yes --
TANTAROS: It's anti-Semitic as I see it.
BOLLING: Another form of intolerance.
Probably Muslims could be the most intolerant group in America.
GUTFELD: But you know what's funny? Remember, they believe that non- Muslims have no right to criticize Muslim behavior. It seems to me -- I remember a Muslim writing a book on Jesus in which the media defended it and said he was a Muslim scholar writing a critical view of Jesus, saying he's not the savior, that's OK.
My feeling is, it is our job as an exceptional culture to pull the weirdoes of the world into the 21st century. If we don't do that, they pull us back into the 17th century or the 7th century. The only way we can do that is to be proud of our culture as an exceptional culture or we let the crazies take over.
TANTAROS: But from the White House, Dana, you remember the president's speech in Cairo, that infamous address. He didn't address honor killings, or genital mutilation, or how women, according to the Koran, are treated worse than men -- I mean, legal rights in the courts. I mean, you go down the list, there's a number of things.
Instead, the president boasted a, quote, "shared history of tolerance."
Should he had caged it a different way than that? Because that's pretty different from that.
PERINO: I don't know what they were thinking. I mean, it was almost six years ago now that he said he gave the speech, and there's always more that a president can do or that you would like to be able to do, but he certainly had other things, I think, that have gotten in the way of that, including a domestic agenda he has had to basically muscle through bought of the problems he had with that.
I do think it is incumbent upon us, however, to watch a film like "Honor Diaries" or read more about what we're discussing.
I was remembering earlier, I read about four years ago a book called "Girls of Riyadh" and it was billed as sort of a sex in the city of Saudi Arabia. It was very interesting about five young women who were good friends and growing up in various different degrees of what we're talking about here, and she had to write it anonymously at first in order to get it out, but it was very helpful to see how different they approached the world, but young people are young people everywhere, and they -- you go through puberty and hormones and all of that and a lot is repressed and it comes out later with a massive amount of intolerance.
I want to ask about what Bob mentioned about the University of Michigan not airing the film, banning it, banning a video. Where in the world would they get the idea it's OK to say that you can't air a video?
Or that a video will cause riots or a video might cause a terrorist attack?
Our own government is standing by that story and that excuse.
TANTAROS: I was going to say it's a perfect transition into our next topic. So, today, former CIA director Mike Morell was on Capitol Hill, finally testifying about the fateful night in Benghazi. Here's his admission, maybe we know why now more people are scared to actually call out radical Islam because of what Morell said.
Listen to this.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
MIKE MORELL, FORMER ACTING CIA DIRECTOR: I took out the word "Islamic" in front of "extremist." I took it out because we were dealing with protests and demonstrations across much of the Muslim world as a result of the video. And the last thing I wanted to do was to do anything to further inflame those passions. The second reason I took it out is because what other kind of extremists are there in Libya?
(END VIDEO CLIP)
TANTAROS: Greg, from this testimony, we heard numerous times that they knew it was al Qaeda from the get-go. Morrell admitted that. So, hid he really think that good editing was going to stop them from killing American citizens? Is that their mentality in the White House? Just edit it out and it will make it go away?
GUTFELD: Yes, and the other thing, and it goes back to me as a broken record about pushing the video. Why did they take their word for it that it was a spontaneous conflict? Because that was their assumption about the world that they wanted validated about the fact that it's always going to be the western idea, freedom of expression that is at fault, and if you blame it on somebody else, you go back to this thing. It's Islamophobic.
So, you have to ask yourself, who pushed the video? It will always be President Obama and Valerie Jarrett because it's their nature, that America is always at fault. The other guys -- they are the victims.
TANTAROS: And they admitted, Eric, Morell admitted, that even though people on the ground said it was al Qaeda, they got reports it was al Qaeda, they decided to listen to people in the United States instead of people on the ground.
BOLLING: Yes, but the operative thing he said was "I took it out."
GUTFELD: Yes.
BOLLING: What do you mean you took it out? It was the information that was handed to you. You took out the talking points so they can skew what Susan Rice and what Hillary Clinton -- Hillary Clinton was originally going to deliver the talking points and then she couldn't. You took it out not because you wanted to get to the truth. You took it out because you wanted to be PC. You didn't want to inflame passions.
By the way, how about getting to the truth? How about we leave the stuff in, the information in, and let the American people decide what the truth is, since you're going to be taking --
GUTFELD: We can't be trusted. We're going to do something bad.
BOLLING: We're kids -- let's tell them that, they might get really mad.
BECKEL: One thing to keep in mind here, they function well, the Islamists, in silence. That's what they like. They like us not to say anything about it.
The other thing Morell said I thought was more damaging was that he took the advice of his analysts back at Langley over people on the ground, the station chief and other CIA operatives. Now, if he did that, taking advice of an analyst, and I know a lot about analysts at the CIA, they're about the last people I would go to for an on the ground breaking situation like this, but somehow, he decided to give their advice and not the station chief.
TANTAROS: Don't you think it's a bunch of nonsense, Dana? He also said at the same time he thought it was a demonstration, he thought it was a terrorist attack, too. How could it be a calculated attack where we knew that they followed the ambassador from Tripoli back to the consulate, back to the state house? How could it be both if you have that intelligence?
PERINO: And that's the 40,000 foot view I tried to take, pull back out of all this and think about the character that you have to have. It's a deep sense of judgment and character when you are responsible for so many people and the livelihoods of your men and women that are in the military and in the civil service, to actually believe that a video could have done that.
Like don't you ask a critical question, is that true? Are you sure?
Can we check that? Can you prove it to me?
That's what I think -- the lack of asking questions is a problem across the government, in big corporations. Whenever there's a problem like G.M., it's a problem because people weren't asking questions and they were afraid to ask questions, just like it seems like we're trying to soft pedal who the extremists really were.
BOLLING: Can I just throw this out? We have to go, but this is CYA.
This is Morell walking back on it. I'm going to cover this up because there's no way. Does anyone at this table or watching honestly think that the CIA at one point wasn't sure if it was either an attack or in response to a video?
They must have had all the intel together saying this is what we're going with. This is what we think. The CIA doesn't operate -- might be this, might be that. Let's got to air with, it could be either one. They don't do that.
He's saying that, covers everyone's butt.
TANTAROS: But they had 33 CIA agents on the ground that night. They decided to ignore them, I suppose, and trust people on the ground. It's like having a carjacking here in New York, but listening to people in L.A.
PERINO: Something Bob has asked from the beginning, why were there 33 CIA agents on the ground?
TANTAROS: That's an even bigger question, and maybe the real answer to why they covered this up.
Directly ahead, do we have "Hangover" star Bradley Cooper for Obamacare reaching its 7 million goal? We've got the back story of President Obama's infamous "Between Two Ferns" interview that so-called led to the Galifianakis effect.
We'll tell you about that next on "The Five."
(COMMERCIAL BREAK)
BOLLING: President Obama sounded very confident yesterday when he delivered his mission accomplished Obamacare speech. But the administration wasn't always so sure about meeting their 7 million enrollee goal. There are reports today that President Obama can thank these fellows for saving Obamacare.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Do not go in the bathroom.
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Will you put on pants?
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: There's a tiger in the bathroom.
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: What's going on?
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: There's a juggle cat in the bathroom.
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: OK, I'll check it out.
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: How does a tiger get in the bathroom? He almost killed me.
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Hey, bro, you mind putting on some pants? I find it a little weird I have to ask twice.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
BOLLING: Evidently, it all started after a visit to the White House by Bradley Cooper. He was brainstorming with Valerie Jarrett and told her if you really want to reach young people and people, have President O do a "Funny or Die" skit with his pal, Zach Galifianakis. The rest is satirical and political history.
So, Bob, we can thank the guys.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
BARACK OBAMA, PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES: I wouldn't be with you here today if I didn't have something to plug. Have you heard of the Affordable Care Act?
ZACH GALIFIANAKIS, FUNNY OR DIE: Oh, yes, I heard about that. That's the thing that doesn't work. Why would you get the guy who created the Zune to make your Web site?
OBAMA: Healthcare.gov works great now, and millions of Americans have already gotten health insurance plans and what we want is for people to know that you can get affordable health care, and most young Americans right now, they're not covered. And the truth is that they can get coverage, all for what it costs you to pay your cell phone bill.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
BOLLING: OK, Bob, so guys from "Hangover" saved Obamacare for --
BECKEL: Well, one thing you've got to give this whole thing credit for is when he did do the thing with the Galifianakis, the Web site did have a surge of people coming in, and signing up.
So to an extent, we thought it was a bad idea, anybody who thought it was a bad idea, apparently it worked pretty well.
BOLLING: Ands, what do you think?
TANTAROS: It reminds me of an afterschool special, right? So, dorky Obama needs some help, so he called up Bradley Cooper, so he calls up the popular kid, Bradley Cooper and they get the funny familiar Zach Galifianakis, (INAUDIBLE) to be able to say it, to help out, to get him to be liked. Because, Eric, if you read the "Politico" story, they actually tell how when the president learned that Brad and Zach were going to help him, he said, they would really do that for me? There's a skit, all we need is music and you have Obamacare, the afterschool special.
BOLLING: What was Bradley Cooper and ultimately Zach Galifianakis, what were they doing at the White House?
GUTFELD: I'll tell you what, they're tools. That's all they are.
Literally and figuratively, they are predictable tools selling a product they don't use, that's -- which is nothing new. Celebrities sell things that they don't use all the time, except this product happens to be coercive. They're actually selling a burden they're immune from.
Could you imagine if they supported the troops in this manner? Troops in conflict, if they supported -- if they supported troops the way they supported government programs, imagine that in Hollywood. But this begins the orchestrated media portrayal of Obama's vindication.
They spent months saying this was a disaster, an ugly, ugly caterpillar, but now it's blossomed into a butterfly. This plot was already written. The media knew this was going to go up like this. It was all set.
BECKEL: Well, how come you guys who were against it didn't say anything?
GUTFELD: I did.
BECKEL: You did?
BOLLING: Dana, you want to take that aspect of it, that they're using Bradley Cooper, turning it into a butterfly, or the issue that our young people listening to Bradley Cooper, LeBron James, buying this and realizing they bought a thing they don't like or can't use?
PERINO: Well, one thing we still don't know is, so, they did get a bump out of the web traffic after that two ferns thing. OK, so that's good. Maybe the ends justify the means. OK, so I wouldn't have done it.
But now I look at it and I think, OK, so what are the liberals, what do the left know that I don't know about communications that works. So, the ends justify the means for them at this point.
However, what we still don't know is out of those people that went to the Web site, how many signed up? How many paid? How many had insurance before?
All of those questions that we have been asking, that continues. The other thing I think is interesting is I have admired some of the best speechwriters and communicators and PR people. They never tell the secret of how the president had come up with that great line or that great event.
They just let the president have that great event.
Maybe years later, you could read about it in a book. This is two weeks later, they're basically bragging that Hollywood came in and gave them the best answer. I like when the president gets to be the one who says the great line.
BOLLING: And now, we know Bradley Cooper talked Valerie Jarrett into it.
BECKEL: Well, but -- I'm glad he did. You know, we do now have a lot of information and statistics coming in. We know the people who signed up,
23 percent did not have insurance before. They're beginning --
PERINO: Where do you see that? I respect your number, but where do you get it?
BECKEL: I read it, I assume the research we did was right and it says here that 23 percent of the people, Rand Corporation, which is a fairly conservative but pretty good --
TANTAROS: We don't know that.
PERINO: They don't know that because the administration hasn't released the numbers.
BECKEL: Suggested 23 percent enrollees had no insurance previously.
BOLLING: Hold on, hold on, hold on --
PERINO: How many were on Medicaid?
BOLLING: I would love to remember who it was who said under 900,000 of those people that you are saying only 900,000, not 6 million or 7 million of people who didn't --
BECKEL: Well, you're talking about a report you can't remember. This is the Rand Corporation. They're pretty accurate.
(CROSSTALK)
BOLLING: Some of this -- there's a big report that was circulating today by a major corporation saying less than a million people that were thrown off their insurance rolls before were the ones counted in the 7 million.
TANTAROS: What about the CBO report, Bob, that came out after the bill was passed and said this would cover 19 million? Still we have not heard the White House address this. We don't know how many people have enrolled in Medicaid.
Let's say that these young people watched "Between Two Ferns", and decided to get the plans. They haven't paid yet. They haven't gotten the bill.
And here's another point. Jay Carney said yesterday, they made the point about this is private insurance. This is not the federal -- this is not the marketplace. This is the federal government telling insurance companies what to offer, how to offer it, and who to offer it to, period, end of story.
BECKEL: I said this yesterday. You guys keep denying all these other groups that are doing it, but Rand and McKinsey are pretty good barometers and have a long history. They say 85 percent of people have paid. I'll take their word for it.
BOLLING: Previously uninsured respondents account for 27 percent. At least 73 percent who are still looking for insurance.
GUTFELD: We've got to know, it was always going to be painted as a success. The numbers both arbitrary and fudged -- government, the media, and academia joined forces to pretend the emperor still has new clothes.
BOLLING: All right. Mina is yelling at me.
PERINO: Even Mina.
BOLLING: Even Mina.
Coming up, Dana gave Greg an exclusive tour of the George W. Bush Presidential Center last week in Dallas. Have you ever seen President Bush's cowboy boots? Here's a peek.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
PERINO: So the president was head of the Texas Rangers. He's part owner of the Texas Rangers, and those are his boots.
GUTFELD: Football team?
PERINO: Yes, football. Look, it has a baseball in it.
GUTFELD: Oh, I thought it was a big round thing.
PERINO: You're going to disappoint Eric.
GUTFELD: I'm sorry.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
BOLLING: All right. More of Dana and Greg's Texas adventure after the break. Don't go away.
(COMMERCIAL BREAK)
GUTFELD: You may have noticed I haven't been here for a few days, but I'm back and better than ever. I have been on tour to promote my new book, "Not Cool." I kicked it off at the Bush Presidential Center in Dallas.
And on Thursday, and, of course, I brought America's press secretary along.
Actually, she asked to come and I said, what was I going to do?
Dana interviewed me there, but beforehand, she gave me a tour of the Bush museum and some of our cameras went along. Check it out.
(BEGIN VIDEOTAPE)
(MUSIC)
PERINO: Here's Greg and I at the Bush Library. We're two tiny people at this really big place.
GUTFELD: By the way, I hate fountains.
PERINO: You do?
GUTFELD: They give me the urge.
PERINO: To what?
So, Greg, these are sculptures of obviously President Bush and his dad.
GUTFELD: I think they're incredibly realistic. This is my size, right?
PERINO: And so are we.
Well, good morning, Mr. President.
GUTFELD: Hello.
PERINO: President Gutfeld. How are you doing this morning?
GUTFELD: I'm perturbed.
PERINO: What's that accent?
GUTFELD: This is my presidential voice. I feel incredibly powerful today. And I feel like it's time to send a message to the world. Get me secretary of state, Palin.
Yes. Now, stat. I think that's the word. Yes, I have decided we're bombing Narnia.
Also, a pizza. I want a pizza, extra large with everything except pineapple. People who put pineapple on pizza, that's un-American.
PERINO: Mr. President, you can't ask the secretary to order you a pizza.
GUTFELD: If I'm the president, I can get whatever I want, according to the phone.
PERINO: And if you want, we can pretend you're the president, you can sit in that chair. He always sits here, and then the vice president, you know, sometimes he would sit here.
GUTFELD: Your feet aren't dangling.
PERINO: Well, I'm not sitting all the way back.
GUTFELD: There you go.
PERINO: So, in these meetings, where you're sitting now, in the policy meetings, I sat over there. And the president and I had eye contact and usually Vice President Cheney, he would be over here and rest his eyes for a minute.
GUTFELD: These are, of course, pictures of the president, doing presidential things.
PERINO: Here's the president and Mrs. Bush with the Dalai Lama.
GUTFELD: Yes. You know what he's doing there?
PERINO: What?
GUTFELD: He's telling them a dirty joke.
PERINO: So the president was head of the Texas Rangers. You remember, he was part owner of the Texas Rangers. And those are his boots.
GUTFELD: Yes, football team?
PERINO: It wasn't football. Look, even has a baseball in it.
He was a president who had taken risks, had a business, and it was successful.
GUTFELD: Nowadays, if you own a business, you're more of a target than you are an inspiration.
PERINO: That is from one of the towers. It was at the very top, and they donated it to the library so that President Bush could help tell the story about what happened that day.
The president throughout the first pitch at the Yankees game and also remember the big megaphone when he was -- this is the megaphone.
GUTFELD: Wow.
PERINO: Yes. So, on the pile on that day.
GEORGE W. BUSH, FORMER PRESIDENT: I can hear you. The rest of the world hears you.
GUTFELD: It was an incredible moment. It doesn't seem like it's, what, 13 years ago, at all.
Why is the lion here?
PERINO: The lion was a gift to President Bush from the president of Tanzania.
GUTFELD: How do you give somebody a stuffed lion, and how do you return it?
PERINO: Well, it's better than giving someone a live lion.
GUTFELD: I would rather have a live lion.
PERINO: What would you do with it?
GUTFELD: Would you ever think of bronzing Jasper while he was alive?
PERINO: Not while he was alive. But it wouldn't be a bad idea.
They've got spot here, and then, of course, Barney. This is when Barney tried to take my job.
GUTFELD: Uh-huh.
PERINO: At the podium.
GUTFELD: He has a more commanding presence.
Who -- in a fight between Barney and Jasper, who would win?
PERINO: Barney.
GUTFELD: Oh, really?
PERINO: He was a mean little pup. But a good one. He was loved by the president. He was an acquired taste.
GUTFELD: Oh, there you go. So you ate the dog. Oh, well.
PERINO: Here we are at the end of your tour of the Bush Library. Did you love it?
GUTFELD: I thought it was great. You're a great tour guide. It's almost like you work at the White House. I thought you were kind of a groupie.
I appreciate you doing it because it must bring back lots of memories.
It's kind of weird to go to a place that basically documents a period of your life, that everybody else can see.
PERINO: It's like a giant scrapbook.
GUTFELD: It is. It's a giant scrapbook. We're inside your scrapbook.
PERINO: Thanks for coming.
GUTFELD: My pleasure. Thanks for having me here.
(END VIDEOTAPE)
GUTFELD: I notice that you look a lot -- you look a lot more alive than you did back then. You always looked exhausted in those pictures, was like --
BECKEL: What was that hairstyle, by the way, that you had?
(LAUGHTER)
PERINO: Look, I set the hairstyle for Washington, D.C. in that era.
BECKEL: Oh, you did?
PERINO: Yes, people would ask for the Dana Perino haircut. No, I'm kidding. I don't know. I could have done better with my personal appearance.
GUTFELD: I didn't mean it that way.
TANTAROS: You probably had other things on your mind. I'm sensing
(ph) the lip gloss and blush.
PERINO: We had fun, though. That was fun, right?
GUTFELD: Yes, it was a good time. It's pretty -- Eric, you would have liked the 9/11 part of it. It's like -- when you're in there, it's kind -- it reminds you of September 10th, how different it was September 10th.
BOLLING: You know, the megaphone is so iconic. To me, I would probably stop and start bawling at that point.
What did it feel like? What was it like? Were you proud? Are you --
GUTFELD: You know, I'm not a museum guy, but I liked the museum.
It's interesting stuff. The part of like going through and reliving all of that.
BOLLING: That right there?
GUTFELD: That was great. That was great.
TANTAROS: Greg, I have to say, seeing you at the desk, it made me think that you were the president, and I got a tingle.
(LAUGHTER)
GUTFELD: I turned you into Chris Matthews.
BECKEL: My thought was sheer terror.
GUTFELD: Exactly.
No, they do have a height requirement. That would make me the shortest president ever.
PERINO: No, actually, I don't think so, because when we were there, we were Googling it. Remember?
GUTFELD: Oh, that's right. I have no memory.
PERINO: You have him by an inch or so
GUTFELD: Excellent. Thank God for that.
PERINO: And tomorrow, there's going to be a height contest between you and me.
GUTFELD: That's right. We finally figure out who is taller, or test anyway in front of actual judges.
PERINO: Yes.
GUTFELD: All right. Dana and I, of course, we did a Q&A with a bunch of FIVE fans down in Dallas. We're going to show you some of that tomorrow night. There we are. It's like a diorama.
A week after winning a landmark case declaring they could form unions, college athletes hit Capitol Hill urging lawmakers to continue their fight.
The latest on the unionization battle after the break.
(COMMERCIAL BREAK)
BECKEL: Just last week, a landmark ruling for the National Labor Relations Board gave Northwestern players the right to unionize. Today, the face of that fight, former Northwestern quarterback Kain Colter was on Capitol Hill to further his case.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
KAIN COLTER, FORMER QUARTERBACK: It's our viewpoint that all athletes, despite your gender, despite what sport you play, whether you're Division I, II, or III, you deserve basic protection and you deserve basic rights. Now, there's a process we have to go through to getting the goals achieved and, right now, this is just the start.
You know, a lot of people want to make this the end game. But this is just the start and we're going to branch out and hopefully reach everybody.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
BECKEL: Many lawmakers including Senator Harry Reid support the ruling.
Some like Lamar Alexander, former education secretary and university president, say the ruling could destroy collegiate athletics as we know it.
Do you buy that, Eric?
BOLLING: I'm not -- probably. I mean, probably, because it's all about collective bargaining.
But let's dig deep on what's really going on. In 1990, the unions represented around 17 percent of the workforce. Now, it's under 10 percent. Union membership is sliding.
Otherwise, why would the United Steelworkers be the group behind bringing this lawsuit, getting the NLRB behind them? Of course, liberals like Harry Reid are going to jump onboard because they're in bed with the unions. Unions say we need this, we need some other forms of revenue because we're dying here. People aren't joining unions.
Sol, they look to college athletes. Will it destroy college athletes, athletics? Yes, anytime you introduce this kind of stuff in there, you're going to get bull's eye.
Yes, college athletes are going to say, look, I deserve more, I want more, and I don't want to work as hard.
BECKEL: He said something interesting, now they're going to reach out to other sports and women in sports. A friend of mine was talking to me about Title 9, the impact this might have on Title 9. And, by the way, I support this.
But the question is, what about other sports in university? The fact is the football team does underwrite virtually all of those costs.
TANTAROS: Yes, it does. And I don't know if unionizing is the answer. However, I'm actually with you on this one, and surprisingly with the Democrats on this one.
I do think that the NCAA has become a huge money-making scheme. It was originally designed to enforce safety regulations. It has become anything but that. They're colluding with the players union.
Look, take away the eligibility requirements. Let these guys, if they want to go pro out of high school, let them do that. But right now, it's a fact -- the NLRB is right on this. These guys devote 40 to 50 hours a week on athletics beyond what most people do. They're considered like employees of the school. They're treated that way.
And everyone says, oh, they get scholarships, they get scholarships -- oh, come on. That -- what they could make, a lot of these guys in the pro, it pales in comparison. They're not primarily students.
The fact -- the word "student athlete" is an oxymoron in my estimate.
Something has to be done.
BECKEL: Greg, in big time college football, Division I, these schools are making a fortune. And not just one television --
TANTAROS: The coaches, too.
BECKEL: And the coaches are making obscene amount of money, and these players' names are begin used in advertising. They're being used to sell jerseys and other things. Shouldn't they get a cut of that?
GUTFELD: I don't think they're going far enough. I want to see unionization in high school sports, grade school, AYSO, Pop Warner. I think we should unionize children and their families because everybody needs to have a voice.
This is baloney. You are just adding more ego to a student athlete.
Student athletes already have more rights than a student. They take the easiest classes. They get the best-looking girls. They have the best food.
And now, you want to give them more power?
Look, they should spend less time pretending to be students. That's it, because they're not really going to class anyway. So just, college is
-- a lobotomy that costs you $50,000 a year. Turn them into employees. I just changed my mind.
BECKEL: OK, you just changed your mind. You're right. I mean, they in fact are employees. As Andrea points out, they're working 40 to 50 hours a week, Dana, and they're not getting afterschool jobs like other kids to get. They have to be on the football field.
PERINO: Where are the people waging the battle against the war on women? Isn't this a war on women? What about women athletes? Are they going to get unionized? Are they going to get --
(CROSSTALK)
PERINO: Yes, it's a field hockey.
BOLLING: Can I just -- since everyone seems to be in favor.
PERINO: No, I'm not necessarily in favor.
BOLLING: Since the other three co-hosts are. What about cheerleaders?
PERINO: Yes, why not?
BOLLING: What about the thespians? What about the people --
GUTFELD: What about the drama club? What about the glee club?
BOLLING: What about the band? The band --
TANTAROS: Look at the eligibility requirements. Let these guys -- if they want to go pro, let them go pro. The cheerleaders aren't the ones making the money. If Johnny Manziel wants to get paid for an autograph, let --
BOLLING: I bet you there's some people that love the band.
TANTAROS: Let Johnny Manziel get paid for his autograph and he can fund his own way through school instead of being at the taxpayers --
(CROSSTALK)
BECKEL: But the band doesn't make any money.
Now, the cheerleaders may make some money --
PERINO: No, they don't.
GUTFELD: I know what you're thinking.
BECKEL: No, I wasn't thinking that.
PERINO: I have to say -- union tactics on campus, what could possibly go wrong?
GUTFELD: It's going to be awesome.
(CROSSTALK)
BECKEL: Represent them, they ought to be able to collectively bargain. I mean, what's wrong with that? That's what it's about.
PERINO: Tom Cruise is thinking up his new movie.
BOLLING: The Ohio State University football team go on strike and put up "The Big Red" in front of the football stadium.
BECKEL: That would be a good idea. They should -- they should go on strike.
GUTFELD: They get everything anyway. By the way, if there was no student union, students would still want to play. It's not necessary.
PERINO: I think the minor leagues still is a good idea even though Brian Kilmeade pooped all over it.
TANTAROS: Think about all the kids that could play if some of these players could go right to the NFL. A lot of them are getting injured in college, and they never get the chance.
BECKEL: I like that point.
All right. Directly ahead, who are the worst people to sit near in a restaurant, besides Greg? Is it the loud talker or the PDA couple? I guess I can say what that means. We reveal the list of the most annoying next on "The Five."
(COMMERCIAL BREAK)
PERINO: So have you ever looked forward to going to a restaurant, only to have your dining experience spoiled by someone at another table annoying the heck out of you?
Well, the Daily Meal Web site has an amusing list of the ten worst people to sit near in a restaurant. And they are these: Loud talkers, complainers, PDA couples, absentee parents, the guy who talks with his mouth full, obnoxious kids, sprawlers, glad-handlers, drunks and jerks.
All right. Andrea, you worked in restaurants. And you know a lot about the restaurant scene. What do you think is the worse one for you?
TANTAROS: The loud talker, but the loud laugher. The girl with the loud laugh. And then you -- it's jarring. Or the loud guy that just busts out, and you want to glare at them. They have no self-awareness.
PERINO: There's also -- there's a lady -- a table over here at Lannigan's (ph) where there's always, like, guys and gals after work, and there's always one girl trying to impress the guy and laughing at all the jokes way too loudly.
GUTFELD: You mean Gretchen?
PERINO: If you're watching, please stop it.
Bob, what about you?
BECKEL: Well, I think it could on this list, but what I can't stand are people with babies sitting right next to you. And the baby is starting to howl and being really loud. The parents are not paying any attention to it. And then when the baby has got to go to the bathroom, I mean, I've literally been driven out of a restaurant from smells. And they carry across the entire restaurant.
PERINO: You must have a very sensitive nose.
BECKEL: I do. Well, you...
PERINO: I don't have babies. I don't.
BECKEL: It's -- that and -- well, I don't know, obnoxiously loud people, but I include myself in that. So...
PERINO: I don't think you're loud. What about you?
BOLLING: I'm not sure if I saw it on the list, was the sender backer.
That is really -- I live in a town where everyone sends stuff back.
PERINO: Really?
BOLLING: It's incredible. I don't care how bad my food is, I will never send something back. I won't eat it or I'll order something else, but I will never send -- it's just my thing. And in my town, I can almost guarantee, every time I go out to dinner, someone sends something back.
PERINO: I agree with you. That should be on the list. How about you? Do you have any?
GUTFELD: Foreigners.
PERINO: Foreigners?
GUTFELD: No, I'm kidding. Anyone guilty of excessive conversation that holds up your drink. Like if the waiter is talking to somebody, and you're like, you just need to get my drink, and they're right in front of you.
The fake cough from anybody when you're smoking an e-cigarette.
Somebody's like "Cough, cough, cough." Shut up.
And last but not least, the silent married couple who are sitting and not saying a single word to each other. And you're sitting there and you're going, "Oh, my God, don't let that happen to me. Don't let that happen to me."
BECKEL: And some of them are really young. Old people, you can understand. The old people are done talking to each other.
PERINO: I'm with you on the customer etiquette. I don't like it when people switch tables all the time, like, "Oh, can I have that table. Oh, wait, can we have this table?"
GUTFELD: What about the bathroom hogs?
TANTAROS: We talked about this during the break, the booth by the window. When I used to hostess, they would come in. Everyone wanted the booth by the window. Or when you give them their check and they say, "Oh, can we have separate checks," for a party of 17?
BECKEL: You know, that bathroom party is exactly right. During the '80s, you couldn't get in there to do a line of cocaine.
PERINO: All right, all right, all right.
GUTFELD: That's why you freebase.
BECKEL: OK.
PERINO: Welcome back, Greg.
All right. "One More Thing" is up next.
(COMMERCIAL BREAK)
TANTAROS: It's time now for "One More Thing." And I will kick it off. So the Australian cast of "The Lion King" decided to break out in an impromptu performance on a flight to Sydney. Look at this. Greg's worst nightmare.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
(MUSIC)
(END VIDEO CLIP)
GUTFELD: That is the worst. That's terror. That's an act of terror.
TANTAROS: The only reason I did this was because I knew Greg would react this way. I'm imagining you on a 17-hour flight. I'm imagining myself, because I'm a sleeper, how angry I would get.
GUTFELD: Oh, my God.
TANTAROS: People think this is great.
GUTFELD: The things I'm thinking right now cannot be -- I cannot say.
I would be arrested.
TANTAROS: You hate those people.
GUTFELD: I hate those people.
TANTAROS: Dana, you're up.
PERINO: OK. I want to take a moment to show you somebody that you should know about. You know his father, Juan Williams. You need to know Raffi Williams. He's a young man who has done amazing work so far in his career. He's actually a Republican, unlike his dad, Juan.
And last week, "Ebony" magazine, there was a commentator who dismissed him in his comments and said he's just some white guy. Of course, he's not. He's an African-American black guy.
And he went on Sean Hannity last night, and what I want to point out to you is just how poised, gracious and dignified Raffi Williams is, and that's just his instinct. He's not coached. Watch.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
SEAN WILLIAMS, HOST, "HANNITY": It seems that black conservatives can be called the worst names, and there seems to be little if no repercussions. Why do you think that is?
RAFFI WILLIAMS, DEPUTY PRESS SECRETARY, RNC: Well, we're pushing back against that now. And I think that for so long, we have been quiet because we're respectful people. We want to go about doing our business diligently.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
PERINO: Be still my heart. I love him.
TANTAROS: He has a Republican brother, as well.
PERINO: Yes.
TANTAROS: Juan Williams has done something right.
PERINO: He sure has.
BECKEL: I beg your pardon.
TANTAROS: Eric.
BOLLING: OK, so O'Reilly and I had a little debate last night on the merits of the Tesla financing, the Tesla car. And it's based on "60 Minutes" did a big piece on it this last Sunday night. They touted all the virtues of the Tesla: no exhaust pipe, no tail pipe. Here's a little piece of it.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: So what is the future like?
(voice-over): Apparently, it's fast and smoke-free. The Tesla Model S is powered by 7,000 battery cells linked to an electric motor. No engine, no transmission, no tail pipe.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
BOLLING: No engine, no transmission, no tail pipe, and guess what?
No sound either. CBS added that sound. You can't make that up.
PERINO: They could have had a little music.
TANTAROS: Greg Gutfeld.
GUTFELD: Yes. I was out -- went out and saw my mother for a couple days. I just want to let everybody know. She's doing a five, even though it doesn't look like she's doing a five. It looks like something else.
PERINO: It looks like the "Star Trek" symbol.
GUTFELD: But anyway, she's doing all right, and she wanted to say hello everybody and thanks for all the cards and stuff she got that people gave me.
PERINO: Hi, Mrs. Gutfeld.
GUTFELD: I'll be in Michigan this weekend, Ohio, Kentucky, and Tennessee. Go to GGutfeld.com. You'll find it.
PERINO: You're going to Nashville?
GUTFELD: Yes.
TANTAROS: We'll keep her in our prayers.
BECKEL: Speaking about books, my old friend Cal Thomas, who is a conservative, and he and I actually speak together. One's a liberal and one's a conservative. He's written a new book, "What Works" with the -- by the way, the foreword is done by Sean Hannity. Another good friend of mine.
But Cal's contention is that there's a lot of solutions already done that government keeps trying to come up with new ideas for things that have already been resolved. If we just went back and looked at what worked and not try to come up with policy and wonk ideas...
GUTFELD: What's on his shoulder?
BECKEL: That is a groundhog.
PERINO: Groundhog.
BOLLING: We know who wrote the forward. Did you write the backward?
BECKEL: Actually -- that's very funny.
TANTAROS: Don't forget to set your DVR so you never miss an episode of "The Five." We'll see you right back here tomorrow.
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