If you think orgasm is the pinnacle of sex, think again.
Some people actually supersede the state of climax and reach a state of transcendent sex. Such lovemaking is said to involve a divine force, and is regarded as a path to a higher consciousness. It has been known to change one’s views on sex and spirituality. Yet this mystical, spiritual sexual experience is one of the best kept sex secrets around.
Why isn’t it well-known? Recognized by the likes of Deepak Chopra, such meaningful experiences are nothing new. Lovers have had them since ancient times. Still, people who have experienced them are afraid of being called crazy or getting mocked.
You can’t really blame them. Many would find it far-fetched to hear that their friend, brother or co-worker was transported to another realm during sex last night.
The closest I’ve ever come to such a spontaneous, divine experience involved my life-force energy shooting up from the base of my spine during an orgasm. It happened when I was with my ex-lover and I found myself blissfully lost in a purplish-turned-white light that went beyond my body.
The feelings were beyond description. Saying it was amazing doesn’t do it justice. But from what I understand, my story can be trumped by even more ecstatic experiences.
People who have been swept into transcendent ecstasy, according to developmental psychologist Dr. Jenny Wade, have reported:
— Seeing visions;
— Feeling heat, light and energy waves throughout the body;
— Reliving past lives;
— Seeing the face of God;
— Paranormal powers;
— Being visited by gods;
— Feeling possessed by spirits;
— Working with natural forces;
— Nothingness, whiteness, pure bliss;
— One with everything – there is no “me” or time;
— A lack of sensory channels;
— Time travel;
What invites transcendent sex? While many equate it to a religious experience, you don’t need to be a person of faith to experience the sacred, transformational power of sex. You don’t need to be a Tantric practitioner or be specially trained in sexuality or transcendent sex. You don’t need to be striving for orgasm. You don’t necessarily have to be making love.
It can happen to anyone at anytime. It does not involve drug use. It should be pointed out, though, that while people have had transcendent episodes during casual sexual liaisons, these intense events tend to be triggered in a more loving context. Wade estimates that as many as one in eight individuals has had a transcendent episode.
While this path to soulful realization seems too good to be true, experts in this area warn that there are hazards. Individuals have reported being overwhelmed by intimacy or seeking out dangerous liaisons in desiring more.
In being transported to this altered, super-dreamlike state, know that things may be nonsensical. You will likely lose all sense of reality. You may not recognize your lover or feel like yourself. The experience can be destabilizing. You may be sick afterward from the intensity.
Despite its potential drawbacks, the healing, profound impact of transcendent sex has the potential for long-term effects. It can result in releasing shame and guilt around sex. It can help one to heal from sexual trauma and abuse. It can lead to a healthier life.
If you’re interested in learning more, Wade’s "Transcendent Sex" promises cautious guidance on this spiritual awakening. I don’t know about you, but I plan to check it out.
In the Know Sex News . . .
— World Bank Comments on Population Control. In an effort to prevent millions of unwanted births in developing nations, the World Bank is encouraging access to birth control and education for women in poor countries. Fifty-one million unplanned pregnancies happen in developing countries every year from a lack of contraceptive use.
— Teen Girls Feel Pressured to Live Up to Sexual Ideals. A study by Girlguiding UK and Mental Health Foundation has found that girls as young as 10 suffer from stress and anxiety, stemming from the pressure to grow up too quickly. Teen girls reported feeling unhappy and vulnerable because of increased pressure from Web sites and magazines to live up to material and sexual ideals.
— Texas Debates Sex Education. Despite spending a nationwide high of $17 million on abstinence-only sex education last year, Texas has a higher rate of teen sex than any other state, the Houston Chronicle reported this week. Texas teens are less likely to use condoms when intimate. A change in Texas policy is unlikely, however, since Gov. Rick Perry supports abstinence programs.
Dr. Yvonne Kristín Fulbright is a sex educator, relationship expert, columnist and founder of Sexuality Source Inc. She is the author of several books including, "Touch Me There! A Hands-On Guide to Your Orgasmic Hot Spots."