"Congratulations, you're 30," she can handle.
"Congratulations, you're 30 and you're still not getting any action," was more than she could stand.
An impending birthday has caused many a rational person to do something a little out of the ordinary. Some people buy a sports car. Others get themselves a significantly younger significant other. Sarah DiMuro decided she needs to get it on — for the first time ever.
DiMuro, a self-proclaimed 29-year-old virgin, says she wants to lose her virginity before her 30th birthday on Nov. 7, and she's enlisted Jane magazine to aid her in her quest to get busy, the New York Daily News reports.
"I'm a little bit anxious about all of this," DiMuro said. "I guess this is why my stomach hurts so much. I never went all the way before because I didn't feel right — I just didn't."
Once DiMuro, who says she didn't have her first kiss until she was 23, decided what needed to be … uh … done, she arranged to have her blog detailing her blind dating quest to snag Mr. Right Now published in Jane.
But her mission to do the deed attracted the attention of more than just the magazine and its readers.
"The Insider" had arranged to have a camera crew at her first blind date, and rumor has it that "Today" expressed interest in her spicy story.
"Me, I haven't done so much with my life in terms of social stuff. So this is my adventure — with a kind of scientific method," DiMuro said.
And Now This From the Comically Bad Idea Department:
CHICAGO (AP) — Prosecutors say a 29-year-old man traveling with his mother desperately did not want her to know he had packed a sexual aid for their trip to Turkey.
So he told security it was a bomb, officials said.
Madin Azad Amin was stopped by officials on Aug. 16 after guards found an object in his baggage that resembled a grenade, prosecutors said.
When officers asked him to identify it, Amin said it was a bomb, said Cook County Assistant State's Attorney Lorraine Scaduto.
He later told officials he lied about the item because his mother was nearby and he did not want her to hear that it was part of a penis pump, Scaduto said.
Amin has been charged with felony disorderly conduct, said Andrew Conklin, a spokesman with the Cook County state's attorney's office.
Amin faces up to three years in prison if convicted.
Thanks to Out There reader Becky.
Speak Softly but Carry a Cardboard Tube Covered in Tape
WATERLOO, Iowa (AP) — Employees of a fast food restaurant had other ideas for a man armed with a long cardboard tube covered in black tape who climbed through the drive-up window demanding money, police said.
Jacob Mason Choi Koelling, 24, of Waterloo, was arrested early Thursday morning after he was restrained by employees at a Hardee's restaurant, police said.
The dining area of the restaurant was closed, so Koelling placed his order for a bacon, egg and cheese combo at the drive-up window, police said.
They said he told employees he couldn't open his door to pay, so he parked his car and walked to the drive-up window. He then crawled through the window and demanded money, said Thane Soderstrom, 19, a restaurant employee.
Another employee wrestled with Koelling while Soderstrom called for help, police said. Koelling was charged with first-degree robbery and burglary.
MONTICELLO, N.Y. (AP) — It's not uncommon for developers in the Catskills to ask local firefighters to burn down old summer bungalows, remnants from the days when the region was a popular vacation destination.
But when the Monticello Fire Department burned down a pair of bungalows earlier this year, they destroyed the wrong buildings.
The bungalows were owned by a New York City couple who had stayed at the property last summer. They drove up to Monticello last week to check on the bungalows and found they had been torched.
Fire department officials say an employee of Concord Associates, a local developer, thought the bungalows were on the company's land and asked that they be burned down. The company says it was just a mistake.
But the couple who owned the bungalows aren't happy. They have reported the incident to the Sullivan County Sheriff's Department.
Thou Shalt Not Mess With the Transportation Department
NEW YORK (AP) — A mission of mercy at a hospital turned costly for a priest who violated a city commandment: Thou shalt not park illegally.
The Rev. Cletus Forson, of St. Andrew the Apostle Church in Brooklyn, was ticketed last month when he responded to an emergency call from a parishioner afraid her mother would die without receiving the sacrament of the sick.
Forson is now protesting the $115 parking ticket, although city officials seem unlikely to absolve him.
"On humanitarian grounds, the law should not be interpreted and applied so stringently that it will prohibit a religious leader from doing his work," the priest said.
Forson said he knew the spot was illegal but he didn't have time to look for a legal spot. He placed his clergy parking permit on the dashboard and went in.
"I couldn't get any parking," Forson said. "It is my obligation to get there and administer to the needs of the sick."
Compiled by FOXNews.com's Taylor Timmins.
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