NEW YORK – The studios keep releasing them on DVD and video so we keep basting the turkeys and warming over the winners in the warm e-z bake glow of The Foxlight.
This week Baltimore goes ka-boom, David Arquette needs a big can of Raid, and kids, don't try this at home.
Tom Clancy gets to bellyache that they changed his book. But he was the executive producer on The Sum of All Fears. His commentary is just one of the extras on the new video and DVD. And if you live in Baltimore, you can play the movie backwards and it has a happy ending. Otherwise, this cautionary tale with Ben Affleck as Jack Ryan Lite is mostly missable. But that didn't stop it from taking in around $120 million and being the most successful of the post-Sept. 11 terrorist movies.
On the flop side of the movie ledger, there's Eight Legged Freaks starring Arquette. This is what happens when you cross Arachnophobia with Honey, I Blew Up The Kid. Even the studio seems to be throwing in the towel on the cover of the DVD and video by boasting: 'From the producers of Godzilla." That's a compliment? I love the other boast: 'Let the squashing begin.' It only made $18 million in theaters. I think the squashing has already taken place.
Finally, it's every parents nightmare -- no, Michael Jackson didn't just move in next door. It's the first season of Malcolm in the Middle. This 'How Not To' primer on raising kids is like a living cartoon and one of the biggest break-out hits for Fox. So why buy or rent it? A lot of great deleted scenes and very funny narration from star Frankie Muniz.