Hail to the Chiefs

If Saddam Hussein knows what's good for him he'll keep his head very low on Saturday.

That's because while your kids or grandkids are watching the Saturday morning cartoons, President Bush will be under going a colonoscopy and President Cheney will be in charge.

I know, he's Vice President Cheney. But for a couple hours, for all practical purposes, if you are Saddam or Al Qaeda, it's going to be President Cheney and it would be a very bad time for Al Qaeda or Saddam to even think about picking a fight.

Not that President Bush isn't up for a fight -- he is and he should be taken seriously.

But with a two-hour President Cheney, it might only take a couple hours to clear up the unfinished business from that Gulf War mistake of letting Saddam off the hook, or any lingering sense that more could be done to even the 9/11 score.

Am I saying a President Cheney would be reckless in disregard for the lives and welfare of innocents that might happen to find themselves standing in between our bombs and certain bad guys?

No, no, no.

I'm sure President Cheney would be more responsible than any living superpower leader with the possible exception of President Bush.

However, let's just say "if" Saddam Hussein were to decide that tomorrow morning -- while President Bush is under a local anesthetic while they're looking for colon polyps -- that this would be a good time to launch some sort of attack against the U.S., or U.S. interests and if "President for two hours Dick Cheney" were to find himself with the obligation of defending America and Americans to the best of his ability and with the full force of the mighty United States military industrial complex...

Well, to update Randy Newmans' classic political science, Boom Goes Baghdad, Boom Goes Damascus... more room for you and more room for me.

Never mind. It was just a thought. I'm sure Bush will be fine. It will just be President Cheney for a very short time and even terrorists are not completely stupid.

It was just a thought. I'm sure everything will be nice and quiet Saturday during the brief, but strong Cheney administration. Hail to the chiefs.

That's My Word.

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