• With: Greg Gutfeld, Bernard McGuirk


    GUTFELD: Well, OK. President Obama needs somebody like me, the married middle-aged dude who has unicorn pajamas. The guy that isn't interested in getting anything free.

    So, that means, President Obama enough with Fluke. Stop going on "The View." Stop by Monday Night Football.


    Vacations, no more beach vacations. Go fishing. Be a guy. We want a president. We don't want a camp counselor.

    O'REILLY: All right. So, you want then the President to come out in an L.L. Bean outfit with a hat and a rod. That's your advice to him on Wednesday night.

    GUTFELD: No. Because that would look goofy. I guess, I want him a, to disown all the wackos in this party --

    O'REILLY: He's not going --

    GUTFELD: You asked me what he should do.

    O'REILLY: I know. This isn't red eye at 3:00 in the morning where people have no idea what you are talking about. McGuirk, to his credit, took a realistic approach to this. All right --

    GUTFELD: No, you're asking me what he should do.

    O'REILLY: Yes, I'm asking you and, so far, you said he should go fishing and throw Sandra Fluke under a train.


    Neither of that is going to happen.

    GUTFELD: He should reject room-to-tomb, I mean womb-to-tomb benefits.

    O'REILLY: He's not going to do that. What's the matter with you.

    GUTFELD: You're asking me what he should do.

    O'REILLY: No. If he wants to win the debate, he's going to reject everything that he said for the past three and a half years.

    GUTFELD: That's a start. It's the start. Say, "I was just kidding. The last three years, I was just joking. I'm for free markets. I'm for free minds. I think America is awesome."

    "I think everything that I ever believed in was a mistake. Occupy Wall Street, that was me. That's not me anymore. I'm sorry, take me back, America."

    O'REILLY: Look, it's my fault, ladies and gentlemen, for actually giving Gutfeld a serious topic to think about. Now, --

    GUTFELD: I've had it with you.


    O'REILLY: I'm the Governor and I'm going to take McGuirk's advice, all right. I'm saying, "Hey, listen. With all due respect, Mr. President, you have no blanking idea what you're doing in the economy.

    And people are going to get hurt. They're getting hurt. Median income down 5,000. Hundred and six percent rise in gas prices and you don't know what to do. And you say to me.

    GUTFELD: He's going to do -- he's going to talk about these invisible but created jobs. He'll bring that up. And then he'll also bring up the auto industry. Because that's all that he's got.

    O'REILLY: So, you'd go right to saving the auto industry.

    GUTFELD: Yes, he's going to have to say --

    O'REILLY: Gas might be high but you wouldn't have a car if I didn't say, "That might be a good transition."

    GUTFELD: You see, I would say though to Mitt Romney, "Stay away from words and topics like see sequestration and Solyndra." Because we're trying to appeal to these independent common denominator nitwits.

    As I said, the dummy who wears the Darelle Reves with sucking down bud lights, he's got cheese doodle-stained fingers, he's going to slip into a coma.

    You are going to lose him. And by all accounts, this is the guy you're trying to reach.

    O'REILLY: You must use colorful language.

    MCGUIRK: Yes, you must use colorful and, yes, a couple of cheap shots. I'm not saying grab a prayer again and throw it at the President. But you got to get down to the gutter is what I'm saying.

    O'REILLY: That would be good.

    MCGUIRK: I'm not suggesting that. I'm not going out there.

    GUTFELD: I am. I'm suggesting that.

    O'REILLY: All right. We're going to take a break and bring in some kind of security.

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