Most people think of foods when they think of the word “aphrodisiacs.” And while certain foods might rev up your engines, it’s not necessarily because of their magical libido-boosting ingredients. Eating these foods can become a sensual experience in and of themselves.
But it’s an experience that can be hit or miss, depending on what mood you are in when you eat them. If you’d like more foolproof ways to turn yourself or your partner on, think outside the produce section.
1. A Bikini Wax. This is particularly a turn on for women, and not for the reasons you might think. The wax itself isn’t necessarily a turn on. Rather it’s the after effect—the ultra- smooth skin. The absence of pubic hair makes a woman’s vulva much more sensitive to touch. Suddenly just the subtle sensation of her pants shifting as she walks becomes a type of foreplay that drives her to the bedroom. Don’t have the budget or the pain tolerance for a wax? Then try a shave. First trim up with an electric razor designed to be used on intimate areas. Then follow up with a three-bladed razor and shaving cream. Shave daily to avoid re-growth itch.
2. Coconut Oil. Vaginal fluids dry up for many women as they age, and dryness doesn’t exactly beckon a woman to think, “Sex! Now!” Rather it allows her mind to ruminate on the unsexy items on the to-do list like sleep, toilet cleaning and grocery shopping. By slathering coconut oil on her skin and her privates after showering, a woman can go back in time and recreate that wet sensation that leads to friskiness. Extra virgin coconut oil feels silky and wet—just like the real thing. Plus it smells and tastes wonderful—unlike most over-the-counter lubricants. It’s also a natural anti-fungal. Just don’t use it with condoms, as the oil could degrade the latex.
3. Running Shoes. Studies have linked erectile dysfunction with sedentary lifestyles and obesity. Nearly a third of men who watched three hours of TV a day reported trouble getting an erection. Physical fitness, on the other hand, has been shown to boost self-esteem and body image, which in turn, has been linked to sexual desire.
4. A Hotel Room. Many men and women need to be relaxed in order for desire to surface, and they sometimes have quite a bit of trouble feeling relaxed at home—where bills are piled up on the table and where dishes are sitting in the sink. This is why so many people that they feel frisky on vacation, but have no sex drive at home. The simple change of location is calming, so they get turned on.
5. An Apron. Perhaps some chore play is in order. Exhaustion kills sex drive, particularly for women. If a man does some house cleaning and cooks a good dinner so she can relax, chances are she’ll want to thank him later on in a way that will make him very happy.
Alisa Bowman is the author of Project: Happily Ever After, the true-life story of how she saved her marriage and sex life. She is also the creator of ProjectHappilyEverAfter.com, a marriage improvement site.