Men's Health

Pursuing Successful Women

Portrait of a female executive


Success is clearly intimidating—why it’s intimidating is much less clear. The idea that somebody else (mainly somebody else of the fairer sex) got things figured out better than we did seems to scare us. What should really scare us is that our fear can keep us from some great experiences.

Success in a woman can mean many things: Many women define their success as a product of their home life or their ability to counsel their friends. The success this article addresses is of the career variety: the type of driven, smart and able women that thrive in the business world. Successful career women may be partners-in-training at their law firms, CEOs of a company or editors of popular magazines. However, they all know how to take charge and get things done. This seems to be the most intimidating of all.

Instead of being afraid of pursuing successful women, embrace their success as part of what makes them so attractive. Whether you have hooked a top woman and don’t know how to handle her or you’re a guy who’s interested in finding one, don’t be threatened, instead take it as a challenge to get such capable women interested in becoming involved with you. Use the following tips to bolster your ability to woo while pursuing successful women.

Know Where to Find Them

Women who are go-getters want to spend their time in valuable ways, since they likely have precious little of it. They won’t be hanging out just waiting for Prince Charming. This means when you're pursuing successful women you may have to show a bit of ingenuity when seeking them out.

One of the most popular places to find powerful people these days is the gym. Women who have control of their careers tend to also be ones who have control of their lives and bodies, and like to stay fit and healthy. So if you're pursuing successful women make sure you prowl the weight rooms, but be careful: There are a few pitfalls to this plan. Women don’t want to feel stalked while they’re trying to do their morning workout. Approach successful women carefully so as to seem casual, and don’t be too pushy.

You could also look in the places that a business woman is apt to go in the course of her day. Check bars and restaurants in the business district and hit the dinner hour — just as the work day ends. Try the line at the coffee bar early in the morning or the streetcar during rush hour. The trick with these busy times is to find successful women when they're idle, and strike up a conversation. This way you’re more confident, and you’re not holding her up as she rushes about.

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Court Her

Although you may see successful women as powerhouses, they're still women and want to be treated as such. Whether you’re just trying to get a date when you're pursuing successful women or you’ve been out a few times, don’t be afraid to offer her your jacket, hold a door or pick her up for a date.

Successful women are fully capable of doing these things for themselves, but everybody likes to be taken care of sometimes. She likely works in a hard-nosed, male-dominated and stressful workplace. So when you're pursing successful women take the opportunity to make them feel pretty and special. You've dated women before, you know what they want — just relax and have fun.

Respect Her Career

Successful women don’t get to where they are by being overly compromising about their careers. Her career matters to her, and if you make her choose between you or her career when pursing successful women, you may just lose. If you’re trying to win a date, show some interest in what she does. Listen and ask questions — this rule stands even if you’ve been dating for a while. Successful women spend a great deal of their time at work, so to know their career is, in large part, to know them. Don’t start whining or pouting about her working late. She will make time for you in her own way, and making her feel guilty about working late will put more stress on her, and the relationship you're trying to build.

Don’t Show Intimidation

Even if you have no idea what to say when pursuing successful women, be cool. Not many people want to date somebody who’s afraid of them, and even fewer want to date somebody who lacks confidence. No matter how formidable she may seem, take the reins and talk to her. Be sure in who you are and what you say. Speak your mind, be honest and engage her in great conversation about things that matter to you: books, movies, sports or even politics. Successful women don't want to be seen as business moguls when they're on dates; they want to be seen as attractive women.

Take Charge

Don’t be afraid to make a decision when pursing successful women. Just because she knows what she wants, that doesn’t mean she wants to decide how the entire date will go. Chances are she’s in control all day long. Take a load off by being the one to decide what you’ll be doing for the evening. Feel free to suggest a restaurant for your outing. This doesn’t mean that you should disregard her opinion. Just don’t be wishy-washy and indecisive.

Rise to the Top

Women have fought for more influence in the workplace over the past several decades. Some of them have fought hard. So it must be awfully discouraging to fight tooth-and-nail to become more successful in a career, only to find out that doing so will make romantic life a complete failure. It's time we men proved that successful women not only have a place in the workforce, they also fit quite nicely in our personal lives too.