Another “Duck Dynasty” book is hitting the shelves. In “A New Season,” the oldest (and beardless) Robertson brother Alan and his wife Lisa discuss their 30-year marriage. It’s a candid and honest look at their tribulations which include Lisa’s multiple affairs. The couple explain how they managed to rebuild their union and how they renewed their commitment. The book also delves into their earlier years, which for Lisa, meant opening up about being molested as a child and undergoing an abortion as a teenager. Alan’s wild past included having an affair with a married woman whose husband came after him. FOX411 spoke to the gregarious couple about the book.
FOX411: This must have been such a hard book to write.
Alan Robinson: It actually was. We’ve been doing our story for several years in front of audiences, kind of like a testimony but when we sat down to write our book with our ghost writer, that week of sort of pouring it out and working back through all of the emotions... you can tell it but when you tell it in a book form, you want the reader to understand what you were thinking and feeling every step of the way so Lisa and I were emotionally drained after that week of interviews.
FOX411: Lisa, were you nervous about having your affair and abortion in print?
Lisa Robertson: Yes, I actually was because then it’s out there in print and people can hold it against you if they so desire to and so that was a thought there for a second but in the end I thought, 'God’s going to protect me and that I’m doing this to help other people so I don’t have anything to worry about.'
FOX411: Lisa, you say that being molested as a young child made you want to please men.
Lisa: I think that took root in me when I was a young child and all that happened because so much of our life is made up from our younger years, our learning years. That was what I learned and we learn a lot of things that aren’t true. For a long time I thought that was my purpose.
FOX411: Have you gotten flack talking about your abortion?
Lisa: A little. I did an interview the other day and we were talking about choices and I was a little bit mixed up and said I was pro choice, but I’m pro choice in as far as God’s choice. I want everyone to make the right choice and I think that has to be a Godly thing.
FOX411: Lisa, you had an emotional affair before you’re other affair.
Lisa: Yes, I did. I think it was 10 years between them.
Alan: Yes, five years into our marriage and that’s what made it hard. We were very open in the book that my family had a hard time with me wanting to take Lisa back (after the 14 month sexual affair). Lisa had a pattern in our marriage. It was difficult. People begin to think this person is not going to change. That was part of the difficulty with moving past what happened - that it wasn’t the first time. That happens a lot in relationships unfortunately, things become a pattern.
FOX411: So how did you learn to trust Lisa again?
Alan: It is hard to trust again, that’s a true statement. We believe God was helping us. I believe there was something bigger than myself giving me assistance. Lisa was very humble, she came to the realization when that affair became knowledge to me that she needed to look inside and find out what she was missing and why she was so dishonest. So I watched her go through that process and it looked real to me. For a long time, to be honest, I was a little unsure. When she’s not with me is she thinking about being with someone else? I think what happened was over time of her being who she said she was going to be and Lisa bent over backwards to make sure I understood she was being honest. She makes it easy for me to trust her and that takes a lot of humility from a person especially when they’ve messed up. I think on my side, the way I helped it was I didn’t berate her, even if we had an argument about something else, I didn’t use what had happened against her as a battering ram. I think when you combine those two together we found healing, but it did take some time. We tell couples, 'You have to be patient especially in those early months and even years.'
FOX411: But surely there has to be cases when you counsel divorce like physical abuse?
Alan: Absolutely. There’s some cases like us where infidelity occurs and a person won’t change. Of course there are cases when a couple shouldn’t be together. Those are unfortunate and you hate it when it happens but it does. It’s back to a person to make a personal choice to what they’re bringing into the relationship. Unfortunately a lot of people chuck it in, in our opinion, way too early for things that can be fixed. It’s easy to make an excuse and move on. The problem is when they do it, they’re a lot of the problem and they take that same thing into a second relationship which is why divorce in second marriages is far higher and even higher in third marriages.
FOX411: Lisa, you say that until you gave yourself fully to Christ you were outwardly religious but not inwardly.
Lisa: There’s a difference between being religious and being spiritual. I think maybe I was acting religious but I did not have the spirit of God living within me. You can act that way for a long time but it comes back to bite you after a while and when difficulties come you fail. Satan’s always out there and he’s lurking. He’s like a lion on the prowl to devour someone. If you don’t have all your ducks in a row then he’s coming after you. I had to look within myself and see who I was and who I was becoming and deciding if that’s who I wanted to be. Whenever you’re living with something like being molested starting from about age 7, you hide that all your life and you learn to hide other things also. I decided who I wanted to be. I had to be totally transparent for Alan. That’s why he was able to start trusting me again. I think it’s important to know that for yourself and also in terms of what God wants for us. I think God wants us to be that way also.
FOX411: You also made your relationship with God more important than your relationship with Alan.
Lisa: Yes, if He’s at the core of everything I do then I’m only going to want to do things that help Alan and he’s only going to want to do things to help me. I think that’s one of the most important facets to the marriage - having your relationship with Christ first and he being King.
Alan: That’s what really changed us. Lisa worshipped me from a young age. It was unhealthy. Until she got her priorities right that Jesus was first and then I was second. It’s been amazing. It’s literally been two halves of a marriage. The first fifteen and then the second fifteen.
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