The Rolling Stones Lose Their Magic

The Rolling Stones stink.

Who am I to say the emperor has no clothes? Okay, I won't. But I will say that I saw that live concert from Madison Square Garden Saturday night, and the old Stones were just awful.

In my previous incarnations in this life, I have been to half-a-dozen Rolling Stones concerts — at least. I have never been disappointed.

But this thing...

If you didn't see it, you might tune in if they're going to air any more shows and figure out if I'm wrong.

It isn't just that they are old (and they certainly are that). It isn't just that more than one guy my age has said to me, "Gee, I never imagined a world in which half The Beatles would be dead and all of the Rolling Stones still alive" — though that is also a breathtaking observation...

It's just that they were bad in a way they've never been bad before. They didn't seem to be playing together. It was all strained and trying too hard, like a guy who takes two Viagra pills.

Jagger — the sainted Mick — looked like an X-Box caricature, like he was nothing more than a video game version of himself... all choreographed, strutty — an emaciated stick figure huffing and puffing himself up.

It was strangely awful.

I know. I know. There are thousands of you out there who love the Stones and who can't believe it's true. Look for yourself.

12x5 was almost forty years ago. Same with Satisfaction. There ya go... it's over. Sorry.

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