The Osbournes, The Ring, Weight of Water and Half Past Dead

The Osbournes, The Ring, The Weight of Water and Half Past Dead in The Foxlight.

Didn't think The Osbournes could get any more raucous or raunchy? That's the beauty of DVD. This first season's set has more bleepin' bonuses and outtakes than you can shake a 55-gallon drum of mascara at. Best of all, there are subtitles. We can finally understand Ozzy. Well, you know, to the extent that that's possible.

Next, plan your week carefully after watching The Ring because seven days later you're dead, according to the premise of the film. This was sort of the Blair Witch of 2002 and plenty creepy. Want to see where it all came from? The Japanese original Ringu is also out.

If you're not a fan of Sean Penn here's something more embarrassing than his trip to Baghdad. It's called The Weight of Water and it couldn't hold the weight of a theater ticket for audiences. Liz Hurley makes the pain a little pleasurable, otherwise this is a muddled murder without the mystery.

Finally, Half Past Dead pretty much describes Steven Seagal's career. I know that seems like a cheap shot, but name three good Steven Seagal movies. Thank you. Case closed.