By Greg Gutfeld, ,
Published May 18, 2015
Experts in artificial intelligence say that if you're younger than 35, you'll live long enough to have sex with a robot.
The Japanese have already created "partner robots" — sexy machines that do chores, while possessing physical dexterity similar to humans. But is this a good thing? Add robot sex to Internet porn and we continue to divorce sex from both emotion and responsibility.
But is that so bad? If you're in a monogamous human relationship for example, artificial love might help quench the desire for sexual novelty that fuels infidelity. A robot's parts can be changed daily: Creating new lovers with different eyes, smaller breasts, a third arm. But in the end, it's still a hold in a box.
I know: Humans are messier than machines. And robots are clean — especially after a wipe down with Windex. I know it's easier to deal with something new and shiny, than something old and wrinkly.
But what if you fall in love? And then your robot cheats on you with your Hoover Wind Tunnel 2 — you know, the bag-less one? I can't risk that.
So for now I'm sticking to real people — figuratively and literally.
And, if you disagree with me, you're worse than Hitler.
And that’s my gut feeling!