New Diet Offers Pints of Beer, Daily Massages for Lucky Cows

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They may be living on borrowed time, but at least they're enjoying it.

A lucky group of cows is undergoing a new diet experiment featuring daily pints of beer and visits from a massage specialist, reports the BBC.

The cows are the product of an project by their owner, farmer Darren Pluess, who is spoiling his herd in order to produce a specialty form of Kobe beef.

The herd go through up to 40 pints a day of local brew, and Pluess says they're completely happy and enjoy their daily libations.

"Beer is basically, hops, water and barley which is consistent with their diet anyway," said Pleuss.

The regular massages the animals receive help encourage tenderness in the meat.

Pluess' wife Katy said the cows can get a bid rowdy when it comes to their favorite beverage.

"If they don't have enough and they run out, when we bring the beer in they get incredibly excited and run riot.

"I don't think they're alcoholics because they do have water as well if they want, but they certainly do enjoy it."

Urinetown Promises to Make a Splash

OMAHA, Neb. (AP) — The opening-night party for "Urinetown — The Musical" will take on a urological cast in Omaha.

Decorative yellow and white flowers will be arrayed in bedpans.

Dessert — something yellow — will be served in specimen cups.

It's what you might expect from the show's sponsor, The Urology Center of Omaha.

The 2002 Tony-award winning Broadway musical was previewed Thursday night at the Omaha Community Playhouse. Among the show's song titles: "It's a Privilege to Pee."

The show is about how a terrible drought makes private toilets unthinkable, so such private activities must be done — for a price — in public amenities controlled by a private corporation, Urine Good Co.

The theater approached the doctors about sponsoring the local amateur production.

Said Dr. Mike Kroeger of the Urology Center: "We thought it would be fun for our staff and would let people know we have a sense of humor."

I'm Sensing a Theme Here...

MANCHESTER, N.H. (AP) — Two men have been accused of breaking into a probation and parole office in an apparent attempt to retrieve drug-tainted urine samples.

Peter O'Neill, 33, who was on parole at the time of the Jan. 4 break-in, is accused of giving a friend dark clothes, a mask and tools and sending him off to burglarize the Manchester Office of Probation and Parole.

When the friend, Michael Neuner, 19, was unsuccessful, O'Neill returned with him to finish the job, court records show.

People on parole or probation routinely provide urine samples to prove they are not using alcohol or drugs. The samples are stored in freezers at parole offices until being sent to the State Police Laboratory for testing, said Jeff Lyons, spokesman for the Department of Corrections.

"I think they had an idea of whose samples were in there," Lyons said.

The burglars destroyed the keypad entry system on the building's front door, used a crowbar to try to pry it open and smashed a window to get in. More than a dozen samples were stolen.

O'Neill was arrested soon after. When he was searched, police found a letter written by Neuner to his sister in which he confessed to burglarizing the office, according to court records.

Neuner later told police he didn't want to burglarize the office but did it because he was afraid of O'Neill. He said O'Neill told him to smash the office's computers to make it look like juveniles broke in.

News Flash! Anyone Can Read What You Post Online!

FARMINGTON, W. Va. (AP) — It was bad enough that police say a man and his father illegally killed two bucks on the first day of hunting season, but what got them into trouble was bragging about it on the Internet.

Robert Daniel "Murphy" Kane II, 26, and his father were fined after the state Division of Natural Resources was tipped off Jan. 23 to the Internet posting, which included photos, on an outdoors-related message board.

In the posting, Kane bragged of killing two bucks on the first day of the 2006 buck season, even though the legal limit is one buck a day, said Sgt. Roy Cool of DNR's District 1 law enforcement section in Farmington.

"I guess you can say that Kane's boasting of his deer kills on the Web drew plenty of attention, but not the kind he wanted," Cool said in a news release.

Kane, of Bridgeport, was charged on Jan. 27 with five wildlife violations, including conspiring to violate wildlife laws.

Kane has pleaded no contest before Magistrate Gizzy Davis and paid $861.50 in fines and costs, including a $200 replacement fee for the illegally killed buck. Investigators also confiscated Kane's 10-point rack, which was waiting to be mounted at the taxidermist, the DNR said.

His father, Robert Daniel Kane I, 53, of Clarksburg was fined $381 on charges including conspiring with his son in game law violations.

Compiled by's Hannah Sentenac.

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