I remember my late, great Irish Aunt Molly, who used to tell me, "Neil, you're worth your weight in gold, and that's quite a bit of it."
Her subtle-as-a-sledgehammer point was that I was a big guy, but she always stressed, "a good guy too."
Unfortunately good guy doesn't cut it when you're running for president of the United States.
And fat guy definitely doesn't cut it.
Take a look at all the presidential candidates at the big debate tonight.
Not a one. Not a one...is fat.
Some used to be fat, or fatter. Not now.
Mike Huckabee — he has lost over a hundred pounds.
Tommy Thompson hasn't lost that much. But he has lost weight. And it shows.
So too Rudy Giuliani. He was never fat. But now he's not even, well, remotely fat.
And just to show you there's no pudgy party pedigree here, Dems too are dumping the donuts. Bill Richardson's lost a lot of weight.
Now so far Al Gore hasn't, which tells some he isn't running. But word is Al's got a trainer. So you never know.
I guess it makes sense that those who might demand we tighten our belts, literally tighten their own.
As the Washington Post's Richard Cohen puts it, "to be overweight, even pleasantly so, suggests a lack of self-discipline.
After all, if you can't push away an Almond Joy, how the heck are you going to push away an Ahmadinijad?
Never mind, Winston Churchill was fat. — And I thought he did pretty good.
Or that Helmut Kohl was really fat and he survived a pretty good long time as head of Germany.
Fat is not where it's at in our society, or in our candidates.
Don't believe me? I want you to look closely at the bunch debating tonight.
Now, I know they're dying to become president.
But you can't tell me more than a few are dying for something else.
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