French Toast

I remember reading this story years ago about a guy who was fired at work yet no one immediately around him knew it at the time. So he kept coming into work.

Every day at 9 a.m. sharp, he would take off his coat, neatly place it beside his desk, sit down and do his job -- making purchase orders, even attending meetings!

Every day, every week, every month, for close to a year. That's how long it took before higher-ups realized he was still there.

It got me thinking: That's one gutsy dude. He was out of work, but not out of moxie.

And I guess the message here is if you think you're still relevant, you are. At least for a while, or until someone catches you. It happens all the time. Just look at the French.

If you think about it, the United States all but fired them -- at least as a friend. And boy, did they deserve it.

They campaigned against a war they said could drag on for months. But didn't say squat about a war we wrapped up in weeks.

They called us an even bigger enemy to Iraqi civilians than Saddam. But didn't say a peep when those same Iraqis were cheering and tearing down statues of Saddam.

They claimed they had a duty to rebuild a new Iraq. But wouldn't lift a finger to overthrow the old Iraq.

Yet, they still merrily march into work on the global stage, thinking anyone cares what they have to say. News flash, Jacques, no one cares what you have to say, because you've been fired. Either you don't know it, or refuse to see it. So let me simply state it:

For being sneaky, you're fired.

For being arrogant, you're fired.

For giving lip service to peace, but trying to profit off a dictator, you're fired.

For claiming you want to help the little Iraqis, but preferring instead doing business with one big Iraqi, you're fired.

For trying to bribe African nations at the United Nations to vote your way, you're fired.

For threatening Eastern European countries they couldn't be in your club if they didn't vote your way, you're fired.

You're fired for your phoniness, your smarmy-ness, your back-stabbing-ness, your clueless-ness.

You're fired for thinking you still matter, when you don't. And for dismissing others, when they do.

Maybe you don't think the world will catch up with you. It's too late. Most countries are already onto you.

So let me be clear, Jacques. Effective now, the French... are toast.

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