Hendrick’s Gin selling a $2,500 penny farthing exercise bike

Because what other bike style says you’re pretentious and mildly interested in fitness?

What do you get when you combine alcohol, exercise and thousands of dollars and then take away the exercise? Why, Hendrick’s Gin’s giant stationary penny farthing exercise bike, of course.

The Hendrick’s High Wheel brands itself as a “genuinely effective and fascinating fitness contraption with a charming lack of convenience.” The $2,493 exercise-themed velocipede offers a similar price tag to other stationary exercise bikes, like the Peloton, but with much less body-toning functionality.

Though Hendrick’s bills the bike as offering an improvement to “cardiorespiratory capabilities, tone the thighs and buttock,” it does concede that the big wheel bike is more for the user to “pedal away at your own leisure” than for cycling to your best beach bod.

Ah, yes, what any fitness fanatic would wear before a jaunt on an exercise bike.

Ah, yes, what any fitness fanatic would wear before a jaunt on an exercise bike. (Hendrick's Gin)

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The bike, which requires neither electricity nor wifi like the penny farthings of yore, boasts an ergonomic seating set-up, a “proof of effort” bulb (which lights up from your pedaling), “an incredibly convenient hydration holder,” as well as a built-in-bookstand and a grassy patch lined with “beautiful fallen rose petals” to remind you of fields of South Scotland, of course.

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If you are lucky enough to have space enough in your home for the “utterly proper pedaling device,” they are available on the Hendrick’s Gin website.

And if you really want to double-down on ostentatiously showcasing your love of alcohol-themed products, Jameson Whiskey is offering fans the opportunity to win a $5,000 “Whiskey Tree” in time for the holidays.

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