Billie Eilish recalls 'horrible body relationship' that led to her signature baggy clothes style

The Grammy winner reveals she used to starve herself years before fame

Hitmaker Billie Eilish is opening up about her signature baggy clothes style, which has been both celebrated and critiqued by fans in her ascent to superstardom.

The 19-year-old "Therefore I Am" singer has long battled body shamers and has even stopped to defend herself on social media more than once. Last year, Eilish went viral after photographers snapped paparazzi shots of her wearing a tank top outdoors which sent her fans into a frenzy because it was a form-fitting article of clothing her fans know she'd never be caught in onstage or in a music video.

In a new cover story for Vanity Fair which she conducted ahead of the release of the Apple TV Plus documentary about her life, "The World's a Little Blurry," Eilish said she approached the now-viral moment rather calmy.

"I think that the people around me were more worried about it than I was, because the reason I used to cut myself was because of my body. To be quite honest with you, I only started wearing baggy clothes because of my body," Eilish said.

BILLIE EILISH SHUTS DOWN BODY-SHAMERS WHO PREVIOUSLY CALLED HER 'FAT': 'THIS IS HOW I LOOK'

Billie Eilish poses at the 62nd Annual GRAMMY Awards at Staples Center on January 26, 2020 in Los Angeles, California. In a new cover story for Vanity Fair, the 19-year-old reflects on her past struggles with her body.

Billie Eilish poses at the 62nd Annual GRAMMY Awards at Staples Center on January 26, 2020 in Los Angeles, California. In a new cover story for Vanity Fair, the 19-year-old reflects on her past struggles with her body. (Steve Granitz/WireImage)

Eilish said the trending photos actually resulted in her being proud of herself for how far she's come today in terms of her dealing with body insecurities.

"I was really, really glad though, mainly, that I’m in this place in my life, because if that had happened three years ago, when I was in the midst of my horrible body relationship—or dancing a ton, five years ago, I wasn’t really eating," she said.

Eilish revealed that she used to take diet pills as a pre-teen. Prior to her chart-topping career in music, she was a dancer.

"I was, like, starving myself. I remember taking a pill that told me that it would make me lose weight and it only made me pee the bed—when I was 12. It’s just crazy. I can’t even believe, like I—wow. Yeah. I thought that I would be the only one dealing with my hatred for my body, but I guess the internet also hates my body. So that’s great," she said.

BILLIE EILISH SAYS SHE HAS A TATTOO THAT FANS 'WON’T EVER SEE'

Eilish went on to declare, "The internet hates women."

Of course, when those viral photos of her in a tank top became a topic online, the Grammy winner defended herself. She uploaded a screenshot from a video she had filmed months prior that discussed why she prefers to hide the shape of her body.

"Do you really wanna go back in time?" she captioned the pic, referencing the video titled "NOT MY RESPONSIBILITY." In the video, the hitmaker states that other people's opinions of her are not in her control. 

Fans rallied around Eilish and defended the musician. 

The platinum-selling artist has previously addressed body confidence issues and explained why she wears oversized clothes on red carpets and during performances. 

BILLIE EILISH DEBUTS NEW SINGLE 'THEREFORE I AM' AND MUSIC VIDEO

She told Forbes, "It kind of gives nobody the opportunity to judge what your body looks like. I want layers and layers and layers and I want to be mysterious."

Billie Eilish has defended her decision to wear baggy clothes in public and during onstage appearances.

Billie Eilish has defended her decision to wear baggy clothes in public and during onstage appearances. (AP)

Eilish echoed her statements in British GQ for its July/August 2020 cover story, saying that she's learning to love her body as she gets older and her decision to not show it off is her realization of her power.

While the world weighing in on her looks continues to be something she discusses -- she recently admitted she has a tattoo fans "won't ever see" -- the 19-year-old said being in front of the camera is something she's always enjoyed.

"I just have always loved cameras," she continued to Vanity Fair, adding she's particularly fond of "watching videos of myself, since I was a little kid."

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.The Grammy winner revealed that she used to take diet pills at age 12

.The Grammy winner revealed that she used to take diet pills at age 12 (AP Photo/John Loche)

"I remember being 10 and being like, ‘Mom, can I watch home movies?’" she recalled.

She's also appreciative of her ability to make her own decisions, she acknowledged. Eilish recalled growing up with peers who "would all be drinking and smoking and doing drugs and whatever."

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"I think because of the way that my personality is—I’m a very strong-willed person, and I think at the time I was very alpha—I’m coming to realize that I may have felt a feeling of superiority," she said.

"The World's a Little Blurry" is set to be released on Apple TV Plus on Feb. 26.