Super-connectors know everyone and everyone knows them. These people build relationships very quickly and with a lot of people. Super-connectors are invaluable people. They match people with opportunities and, in doing so, they leave their connections with a positive opinion of them and their abilities.
One of the major misinterpretations people have about connectors is that is that it is easy to be a connector. It is not. In fact, it is very difficult to become a super-connector, because it requires the unique ability to understand a person's needs moments after meeting them.
How can we become super-connectors? Below are a few tips for anyone trying to become a super-connector. Not one tip is more important than another, but it is important to understand your personal strengths and weaknesses in each area so that you can focus on improving them one at a time.
“To strengthen your interpersonal influence, don’t win arguments. Instead, win hearts and minds.” - Mark Goulston, Real Influence: Persuade Without Pushing and Gain Without Giving In
Super-connectors know what we want.
One of the first questions a super-connector may ask you after you meet them is, “How can I help you?” This question is used to figure out exactly what it is a person wants so they can immediately create a lasting relationship with you by figuring out how to help you achieve your need. It is a brilliant tactic. uper-connectors like to stay in “in the know.” They will know what each of their connections are capable of, who is in their network, and what connections need or are looking for. This allows them to instantaneously connect people based on needs and abilities, while increasing their own value.
Super-connectors make time for their connections.
A key element in staying connected and remembered is face time. People who live the life of a connector do not eat lunch alone; they find someone to eat with. They do not wait in the airport during layovers; they call someone in that city and meet for coffee. Connector types are constantly updating their network of their travel plans and whereabouts so that they remain fresh in the minds of their network. Even if every person they know is unavailable to meet, they will remember that they were invited to meet. These face-to-face interactions go along way for connectors.
Super-connectors take notes.
When most people add a new contact to their Rolodex, they take down basic information, such as phone number, email, or the person’s job title. Connectors go a step further and take notes. A connector may write down their first impressions of the person, how they met, where they met, and any immediate information gathered from the person. A connector would also make note of anyone that they connected the person to and why. This allows connectors to make everyone they meet for a second time to feel important and remembered.
Super-connectors are not afraid to loop in everyone.
When a connector has a question about something or finds something suspicious, they are not afraid to add everyone involved on an email and ask. This is what makes connectors transparent and in control of their network. Connectors do not allow people to change their opinion of someone or a situation without a public questioning. This is what makes a connector trustworthy and why they can trust people in their network. Being trustworthy and trusting is a key for super-connectors.
Are you trying to be a super-connector? Start small and stop to think, do you know any super-connectors? Having a super-connector in your network will help you in expanding your network and give you someone to observe and you work to hone in on your skills.