This is a rush transcript from "The Five," May 22, 2018. This copy may not be in its final form and may be updated.
DANA PERINO, CO-HOST: Hello, everyone. I'm Dana Perino along with Kimberly Guilfoyle, Juan Williams, Brian Kilmeade and Greg Gutfeld. It's 5 o'clock in New York City, and this is "The Five."
President Trump addressing two major issues today while meeting with the president of South Korea, including his summit with North Korean leader Kim Jong-un. We will get to his comments on that in a moment. But first, the president is commenting for the first time on camera about an FBI informant communicating with associates of his campaign.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
PRESIDENT DONALD TRUMP: A lot of people are saying they had spies in my campaign. I hope there weren't, frankly. But some man got paid based on what I read in the newspapers. And, I think the Department of Justice wants to get down to it, and I can tell you congress does. If they had spies in my campaign, during my campaign for political purposes, that would be unprecedented in the history of our country.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
PERINO: Senator Chuck Schumer is saying these moves to learn more about the FBI informant are an attempt to obstruct the special counsel Russia investigation.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
SEN. CHUCK SCHUMER, D-N.Y.: While an investigation is open and active, demands for oversight are tantamount to interference. Especially, when the folks demanding the information are the most biased, irresponsible actors, a man like Devin Nunes, who I hear privately for my Republican colleagues, they think he's off the deep end.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
KIMBERLY GUILFOYLE, CO-HOST: Oh, please.
PERINO: All right. Off the deep end? I don't know. There's all sorts of stuff going on. OK. So, here's a question, Kimberly.
PERINO: The president has the power as the chief executive officer, the President of the United States, commander-in-chief, to declassify all of these documents.
PERINO: Would just that be a good idea to get over it?
GUILFOYLE: I'm so glad I was the first question because I think it's fascinating and there are a lot of people calling for it, saying, you know what, let's just show complete transparency, declassify the documents and put it all out there. So, there isn't some of this leaking this and leaking that, putting bits and pieces out. It will actually show the whole framework, and exactly what happened, and who did what. And maybe that's what the American people need at this point instead of like a drip from the faucet coming down. Put it all out there, and then we'll know.
PERINO: What do you think, Brian?
BRIAN KILMEADE, GUEST CO-HOST: I think.
PERINO: Are you for that or you're not for that?
KILMEADE: A legal expert will say that that is a huge mistake because there might be somebody inside Russia that we're dealing with right now that are helping us today. I would say this, if you're doing a counterterror operation, why don't you stop with the people -- why don't you start with the people that are actually trying to infiltrate, the Russians. Show some guts. Go over to Russian and ask them what's going on, or use your contacts to find out what they have to say. Instead, you're going up to these ancillary people on the Trump campaign, and nobody says they're major players, and trying to find out what somebody might have whispered to them in a drunken conversation. And for people to say, like, Chuck Schumer, it's irresponsible to allow these people to find out who has infiltrated your campaign. That's because it's not your campaign.
KILMEADE: If someone infiltrated Chuck Schumer's campaign, they wouldn't say, oh, wait a second, the FBI is allowed to have their sources. I don't blame President Trump for being outraged, to find out what was going on in -- or not going on with this Cambridge attorney -- excuse me, the Cambridge professor. I don't blame him for finding out Carter Page, Cloves and Caputo, what was happening with these guys and the names that came out. Why wouldn't you be curious about that? It would be illogical for him not to be. The only thing at stake is his presidency and how long he stays.
PERINO: Well, OK, Juan, let me ask you then about -- the idea that if the deep state, if we're calling it that, was so determined to hurt President Trump, what about the Democrats feeling like they actually hurt Clinton more because they kept the FBI investigation into the Trump campaign under wraps, but were more forthcoming in the press about Clinton.
WILLIAMS: Well, I mean, that's -- you know, kind of contradicts the whole flow of what you're seeing now coming from the president and conservative media, that the campaign that was hurt by the FBI was the Clinton campaign. There was no damage done to President Trump's campaign. In fact, I mean, there's some people who are arguing that because they were conducting counterintelligence operations, as opposed to a criminal investigation, they were actually trying to protect and try to act as a buffer to keep the Russian influence out of all the campaign, including the Trump campaign. But I think what you're seeing now in response to your question, Dana, is an effort by the president, and I think it's unprecedented to sort of weaponized an investigation into the investigation into him.
PERINO: But isn't weaponising, Greg, if it's the Justice Department saying, OK, look, we have an inspector general that everyone seems to support, Michael Horowitz, because he's a fair guy, and he says he'll take a look at this as well. So, can we just let that play out? But it could be months.
GREG GUTFELD, CO-HOST: What is Russian for Mexican standoff? That's what we have right now.
GUTFELD: There you go. It's five versus five. Look, I actually see what -- the question that you just asked Juan. I see the opposite. Hillary's investigation was put in the press to help her. Remember what Comey said, got to get this out of the way because if she wins and this comes out, we look really bad, so let's help her. Trump was kept under wraps because they wanted to catch him.
GUTFELD: That's why you see -- why is this one known, why -- you can look at it anyway.
PERINO: Or because they thought he wasn't going to win.
GUTFELD: Yeah, that's true. But it is -- going back to the Laurel and the Yanny, which I will never give up, the fact is, which collusion story now is more persuasive, all right. So let's take the Yanny, which is the Trump collusion story, it's been going on for 18 months. We haven't found a damn thing. Then you look at the Laurel of collusion, FBI, Hillary, Democrats, the British spy, one informant, maybe two informants inserted in the campaign. If you compare these two sides, you've got one where there's a meeting with a woman about the Magnitsky Act, that's something like that, right? Oh, that's Earth shattering. Meanwhile, you've got a dossier paid for by Hillary. You've got an informant, maybe two, placed as a favor. You have the press playing it down. You have the dossier contents leaked. If we start comparing these things, one is making a hell a lot more sense as collusion than the other.
WILLIAMS: I think you're going down what I would call the rabbit hole, because there's a lot.
GUTFELD: We've been going down -- Juan, we've been going down this rabbit hole now for 18 months. Excuse me if I find another rabbit hole to go down.
KILMEADE: The Washington Post, the New York Times on Thursday.
KILMEADE: . they began to leak out information, maybe to get ahead.
KILMEADE: . to let us know that there's a rabbit hole out there that you're about to go down. So, let me give you an idea what at the bottom. Here's what I would say, I think Alan Dershowitz nailed it when he said I don't care of it's the '98 Clinton investigation, now the 2017-16 Clinton-Trump campaign. You will never get to the bottom of it as long as there's a -- it is this type of operation. We've got to go back to the 9/11 commission to get answers. Publish the results because it did not affect the election. You should just find out what's wrong to stop the next problem, because this horse is out of the barn and no one even saw the horse.
WILLIAMS: Well, I think there's a problem here. First of all, this latest effort to somehow say I hereby demand, like he is not president, but he's some authoritarian ruler. I hereby demand.
WILLIAMS: That to me -- well, what happened, Greg? Immediately, Rod Rosenstein, the deputy attorney general said OK, I'm going to do this. And the question becomes is he simply trying to appease the president or is he following orders?
GUTFELD: You're obsessing over words. I hereby -- OK, it sounds like King Arthur's castle.
WILLIAMS: It sure does. It sounds like a king, not the President of the United States. Because you are normalizing this kind of abuse of power while the president is under a special.
KILMEADE: But what I think everyone is missing is not who's right or wrong, it affected -- Trump is just trying to run an election. He hires his foreign policy council, then he got on the back of a Cheerios box. And they go out and they do their thing, and somehow they are targeted by this informant.
PERINO: But the government told the Trump campaign the Russians are going to try to do this.
PERINO: OK. They knew. And then -- whatever -- the people that are on the campaign. We know that they did have these contacts, Mickey Mouse, whatever, drunken things, but those weren't disclosed, Kimberly, so then you have this question. And I agree the Laurel and Yanny thing. But I just don't understand if we ask -- the house Republicans were asking -- 12 house Republicans are asking for a second special counsel. If you want to make this so much longer and lead this show every day for the next ten months on this issue, that will be a good way to.
GUTFELD: But it's still unfair because you're saying, oh, we'll keep going with this other investigation and we'll keep saying.
PERINO: No, I'm saying release all.
PERINO: . release all the documents tomorrow.
GUTFELD: But, you should also say, well, if they think this is just as important, then it's just as important.
GUILFOYLE: Then, it's just a finish. So, we concur on that, that they should just release all the documents, because I think then we're going to try -- you know, get another special counsel. Let's have the I.G. report come out. Let's have the documents released, it certainly within the power and authority of the President of the United States to do so. So, it's not like he's trying to hide something. He's saying let's put it all out there. And as it relates to any people that we have operating in the theater that can be compromise, you can redact their names. It's not like you just turn over there's nothing. There are protections in place. This legal expert.
GUTFELD: What about North Korea?
PERINO: Go for it.
PERINO: Knock yourself out. Here listen to the president on North Korea.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
TRUMP: There're certain conditions that we want, and I think we'll get those conditions, and if we don't come we don't have the meeting. North Korea has a chance to be a great country, and it can't be a great country under these circumstances that they're living right now. For a short period of time, we've been dealing with North Korea and it's been a, you know, good experience.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
PERINO: So, the president basically saying we're tapping the brakes on this thing, Kim Jong-un, and we are not just gonna come over there for a show.
GUTFELD: Yeah. No, this is purely negotiation tactics. Look, you know, he -- you know, if time is not in his favor, the deadline moves. He introduces and reintroduces key things that we've heard before, which is like you never know how it's going to go. You never know until the last minute. When you're buying an apartment or a car, you never know when somebody is gonna walk out, they might walk out once, twice, three times. And the one thing that's important was the tone, which is it's not the end of the world if it doesn't happen now because it's going to happen. There's a key thing in this. He's dangling the carrot while holding the stick, while remaining optimistic and promising, while also unloading flattery on everybody. This is his unique tool set.
KILMEADE: It's clear that it was China that turn things, I believe, that week before. Next thing you know, Kim Jong-un in his unitard shows up on that beach in China. And they're staring at the ocean and it comes back, and next thing you know he's got a brand new tone and he's upset about the military exercises. Clearly something happened a week before. Fine. But, I was surprised it didn't happen earlier, but they're on a one-way tractor coming toward some type of legitimate summit.
PERINO: Well, I guess it could still happen. But maybe June 12 is a little bit too soon.
GUILFOYLE: Yeah, that's probably a little bit, you know, aggressive. And so, the president is doing what he should do which is letting the American people know don't have your hopes up that perhaps it's not going to happen June 12, but it doesn't mean that it's not going to happen because that's coming up pretty quickly. And the point is to just rush to a summit, but to get to it in the right way and make sure that some of the terms and ideas are specified and there is some accord.
(CROSSTALK) WILLIAMS: I wonder, you know, gee, I don't know what's going to happen with that Nobel Prize.
GUTFELD: I saw that coming.
WILLIAMS: I don't know.
GUILFOYLE: Here we go.
GUTFELD: I saw that coming. Root against the president.
WILLIAMS: Let me just say, Kimberly, if he wasn't acting on the basis of impulse and I'm going to just prove that I'm the only president who can do this, George W. Bush, Bill Clinton, Barack -- they couldn't do it, but I'm going to do it. Maybe they would have thought, oh, maybe we should set the terms before we agree to a meeting. That's what most president.
GUILFOYLE: You're just too eager to criticize his efforts to try to get to a peaceful solution. My point is there're bumps along the way. China is playing a big part in it, so it's a very complex situation.
WILLIAMS: Correct. That's why you saw other president say giving this guy a meeting is a reward for him. He wants that international stature. We don't give that unless you are very clear you're going to do away with your nuclear weapons. Clearly, that has become the point of contention.
GUILFOYLE: That approach in the past has not garnered favorable results, has it?
KILMEADE: I do think the pressure in this is one issue -- he's never even been in a rally without saying maybe it will happen. Maybe it won't.
GUTFELD: He never lied about this.
KILMEADE: Last week he didn't tweet out anything derogatory.
KILMEADE: . inflammatory, derogatory. He went after Brennan.
GUILFOYLE: This is behind the scenes. This is China that's involved in -- yeah.
PERINO: And North Korea has some nerve. They asked one of their new demands is that the South Koreans have to return 13 defectors that worked in a restaurant in China back to North Korea. Please, I hope that doesn't happen.
PERINO: OK. Next, Democratic hysteria over President Trump's animals remark intensifies, details next.
GUILFOYLE: All right. You like that, Greg?
GUILFOYLE: It's been almost a week since some media took President Trump's animals comment on the murderous MS-13 out of context, but some Democrats still can't get over it. Among those railing against the president is the Oakland, California, mayor who you recall tipped off illegals to help them escape ICE raids.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
LIBBY SCHAAF, MAYOR OF OAKLAND, CALIFORNIA: I believe that this president's language is racist. It is fearmongering and it is trying to distract the American people from the job that elected officials are supposed to do, and that's to improve the lives of the people that we represent, instead of casting blame and dispersion against a very vulnerable population.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
GUILFOYLE: Well, as liberals criticize Trump for his language, a Harvard law professor was forced to apologize for this comment he made about the president.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
LAURENCE TRIBE, HARVARD LAW PROFESSOR: You can't be the boy who cried wolf and expect to have a viable impeachment power. You can't use it over and over again against the same president.
UNINDENTIFIED MALE: Right.
TRIBE: If you're going to shoot him, you've got to shoot to kill.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
GUILFOYLE: OK. Greg, so a lot of incendiary, inflammatory comments, in particular the comment about the president being racist it's just totally out of line.
GUTFELD: These are both examples of metaphors, and if you're not going to take the word -- if you're going to take the word animal literally, then you have to take shoot to kill literally. I don't take either literally. It was an unfortunate choice of words. And I'm very pro-metaphor, and I think journalists should be pro-metaphor.
KILMEADE: You ran on that platform.
GUTFELD: I did. But I love this.
GUILFOYLE: He's still running.
GUTFELD: Right now, an MS-13 member just got a 40-year prison sentence for conspiracy, which included the murder of a 15-year-old boy. You know what his name was? Ten bucks, I'll give you ten bucks. What was his nickname?
KILMEADE: The animal.
GUTFELD: Animal. So, I think Trump is right. His nickname was animal and he killed a kid. The thing is I think any time the Democrats are standing up for a murderous drug gang, it's a bad day for the Democrats. It really is.
WILLIAMS: Do you think this is about somebody standing up for MS-13?
WILLIAMS: That just proves how off you are on this, because what we're talking about.
GUTFELD: Not evidence.
WILLIAMS: . is the president who is referring to people as animals.
GUTFELD: Gang members, Juan.
WILLIAMS: No, no, no, he has -- he has managed.
GUILFOYLE: I mean, look, they're so friendly and innocent. Look at the pictures.
WILLIAMS: . most immigrants, especially illegal immigrants.
GUTFELD: So they're all gang members. So you're saying all immigrants are gang members?
WILLIAMS: Wait, let me finish.
GUTFELD: Go for it. You're digging your own hole.
WILLIAMS: Most immigrants are not bad. They're hardworking people who come to this country with great dreams, willing to make tremendous sacrifices in order to.
GUTFELD: I agree.
WILLIAMS: . American family.
GUILFOYLE: No one disagrees with that.
GUTFELD: You're conflating that with gang members.
WILLIAMS: President Trump, at the campaign level and now as president, has continually made the case that, oh, you know, these illegal -- they come in here, rapists, thieves, and now animals? No wonder people are upset.
KILMEADE: There are times the president makes mistakes. This was not one of them.
KILMEADE: This -- I was clear, I've watched it. He clearly was talking about the gang members. He was not talking about anyone who crosses the border. And, in particular, these guys cut out the body organs of people when they're still alive. There's about 10,000 in the United States that prefer instead of shooting you, to use a machete, because they want the blood.
WILLIAMS: Is that typical of most immigrants?
GUTFELD: That's the point. He was calling them animals. My goodness.
KILMEADE: Juan, there are times the president is does not say what he means. This was not one of those times.
WILLIAMS: Well, the thing is that having long engaged in demonizing, if not dehumanizing immigrants, when he said this, it struck people as, my God, it's a wink and a nod again to his base. Oh, let's hate on immigrants.
GUTFELD: No, no, no, no. So, basically, because he was right there, he must have been wrong another time. That's how they justify hoaxes.
GUILFOYLE: OK, Dana.
KILMEADE: Here's Dana.
PERINO: I just think that people need to pick their battles a little bit more. Be more strategic and smart about picking your battles. This is not one that I would -- in fact, I think the Democrats could have gone a step further, like outflank the president and be tougher on MS-13 that he is. Like, try that maneuver next time because this one didn't work.
WILLIAMS: There's an interesting column today in the Wall Street Journal by Gerry Seib about immigration, and what he said was we have declining birthrates, we have needs and so many industries for workers right now, but we're not having a discussion about how immigrants, in fact, could add to our economic activity, to the vibrancy.
PERINO: That's a great discussion.
WILLIAMS: When somebody is calling immigrants animals.
GUTFELD: No, it's not if you misidentify that is calling immigrants animals. He was calling gang members animals.
WILLIAMS: Don't call anybody animals.
GUTFELD: Oh, what about Hitler? Hitler is not an animal?
GUTFELD: Answer this question, Juan, is Hitler an animal?
WILLIAMS: No, no, how about the worst criminal in the United States? Is he an animal? No, he's a human being.
GUTFELD: Well, you evaded the question.
WILLIAMS: Well, you're trying to playing games. I'm just trying to be.
GUILFOYLE: No, we're not. We're not playing games. I'm a product of immigrants.
GUTFELD: His nickname was animal.
GUILFOYLE: Listen, the president and Americans, we appreciate the value and work of immigrants and families that come over here to be part of a productive, law-abiding society.
KILMEADE: Dana, you stop me if I'm wrong here. Two-thirds of the immigration debate, we can actually agree on.
KILMEADE: It's the one-third we can't get past.
GUTFELD: I want you deported, Kilmeade.
GUILFOYLE: Back to "Fox & Friends."
PERINO: If everybody could agree on MS-13 being the bad actors.
PERINO: Actually, we're not agreeing on that because that's what this whole thing has turned into because people chose.
PERINO: . to go after the president on one particular thing.
WILLIAMS: No, so.
PERINO: You're never going to get an immigration.
WILLIAMS: I agree. I don't think you're going to find too many defenders of MS-13.
GUTFELD: They're called the Democrats.
WILLIAMS: Do you really want to call human beings animals?
GUTFELD: Yeah, why not.
GUILFOYLE: If the shoe fits -- by the way, that's the nicest thing I've heard gang members and MS-13 called. Come in to one of my courtrooms and you'll see what they do. They're called savages and everything else.
GUTFELD: He nickname himself animal.
GUILFOYLE: Right. And one of them self identifies named animal. OK. So, let's not get caught up in this little vanilla biscuit, oh, you know, semantic gymnastics. You know what he meant. He said it. He wasn't talking about hardworking immigrants and that's that.
PERINO: But that other debate is a good one to have if we could actually.
GUTFELD: We do have. We've done it on The Five many times.
GUILFOYLE: All right. Ahead of midterms, Democrats are now mimicking President Trump's winning campaign strategy. Are they a party out of ideas? Next.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
TRUMP: We are going to drain the swamp. We need to drain the swamp and we're going to do it and we are doing it. Drain the swamp.
(CROWD CHANTING DRAIN THE SWAMP)
(END VIDEO CLIP)
KILMEADE: Hey, it worked for President Trump in 2016. Remember drain the swamp. Now, it appears Democratic leaders are trying to hijack one of his signature phrases, his slogan, for example.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIPS)
REP. NANCY PELOSI, D-CALIF.: The American people are confronted when the most compromise, corrupt administration in history. Instead of delivering on its promise to drain the swamp, President Trump has become the swamp.
SCHUMER: The swamp has never been more foul or more fetid than under this president.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
KILMEADE: As a tribute to Senator Schumer, I'm going to move my tie.
GUILFOYLE: And looked down at your paper, so we only see the top of your head.
KILMEADE: Meanwhile, deputy DNC chairperson, Keith Ellison -- OK, I'll call him a chairman, debuts a bizarre new anti-Trump song over the weekend.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
UNINDENTIFIED MALE: I want to be called a stable genius. I just call my best friend, Vladimir Putin. Vladimir Putin. My buddy, Vladimir Putin. You can stop asking about covfefe, that's just Russian for porn. Stormy Daniels. I miss you, Stormy Daniels.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
KILMEADE: Democrats may want to rethink these type of tactics, or they may want to embrace them, because a new CBS poll shows the midterm, generic ballot advantage for them, that was in double digits, is now down to single digits, under five in most polls.
Joining us now is Dana Perino, ignored in the last block because I believe you're undervalued.
PERINO: Thank you.
GUILFOYLE: Because you, Chatty Cathy, are talking too much. And this one, and this one.
KILMEADE: Can I finish?
KILMEADE: Dana -- Dana, what do you think about this, these two instances of extreme behavior?
PERINO: It is a strange thing. The Laurel and Yanny thing might get old, but I feel like it's been really instructive over the past week to understand how people can see things so differently.
So when Keith Ellison does that performance in front of that crowd, they love it. OK? They love it. When President Trump is at his rallies, his people love it. And either -- if you look at it from the other side, like, "I can't stand it. I can't stand it."
I do think that the Democrats are a little bit in trouble. Just today, four of the House seats removed from -- from the Democrat position to either solid Republican or lean Republican or to toss-up, where it had been in the Democratic camp.
If we're talking razor-thin margins for who's going to control the majorities in the fall, I think that the Republicans are definitely on the right track.
KILMEADE: It's interesting, because you know, it's so far away. We didn't have the generic ballot. It's almost giving the House away to the Democrats already. Can they hold the Senate? But now things have changed a bit.
But what they're pointing to, Juan, is Scott Pruitt has had some problems.
KILMEADE: Ben Carson has had really nice furniture. Tom Price made some bad travel decisions, lost his job. I don't know if that's a swamp.
WILLIAMS: How about Mick Mulvaney saying he'll meet with people who are donors? How about --
KILMEADE: That was taken out of context.
WILLIAMS: How about Michael Cohen --
PERINO: I think Broidy, that story today was big.
WILLIAMS: Yes. How about -- how about Michael Cohen just doing business with companies in order to buy the pay-for-play access to the president. I think he's the president's lawyer.
WILLIAMS: How about less taxes, less regulations for the big corporations and for the rich, not for the working people? How about payments to a porn star and then lying about it? Hmm. Swamp-like behavior, seems to me.
KILMEADE: Do you like -- you like the phrase?
WILLIAMS: Yes, drain the swamp.
KILMEADE: Even though it was taken right from Donald Trump?
WILLIAMS: I think --
KILMEADE: Why not use MAGA?
WILLIAMS: Donald Trump made it a hit. Drain the swamp.
KILMEADE: So do you -- don't you think in terms of labeling and in terms of branding, don't you think that that ship has sailed?
WILLIAMS: Don't you think this is like Jiu-Jitsu, where you use your opponent's energy against him?
KILMEADE: "Karate Kid" is coming back, Greg.
GUTFELD: I know. That's the only thing --
KILMEADE: We do not know if Ralph Macchio's still got it.
GUTFELD: I know. He's only 70.
GUTFELD: So I think he can come back.
The blue wave might be a blue grave the way they're headed. They've got no originality.
I came up with some planks for them, the top Democratic ideas. Gang members are people, too. I think that should be -- Hamas are just victims of Zionism. Coffee shops make great homeless shelters. We're going to do that.
KILMEADE: Coming up later, yes.
GUTFELD: You can spy on campaigns. And we liked it better when North Korea wanted us dead.
See? Every time there's progress, the Democrats lose.
GUILFOYLE: ISIS flourishing.
GUTFELD: The more there is progress, the Dems lose.
By the way, I have to defend Keith Ellison. I think he had a good -- he has a good voice.
GUTFELD: That was a talent show. I've see some Republicans in talent shows. Oh, man, pretty bad.
But ridicule does feel good. It soothes your friends, but it's not a plank. Right now, the Democrats prefer to be the hecklers in the stands rather than being on the field. They're like the drunk guy screaming at the third base coach.
PERINO: And it's been 18 months.
KILMEADE: Kimberly, they had --
GUTFELD: They've got nothing.
KILMEADE: That was very good.
GUTFELD: Thanks, Brian.
KILMEADE: They had a slogan, "Better Deal."
KILMEADE: It wasn't going anywhere, because Russia and impeachment took and swamped it.
GUILFOYLE: Yes, no, absolutely. I mean, the Democrats are just guilty of plagiarism. They're trying to steal from President Trump.
GUTFELD: Just like Joe Biden.
GUILFOYLE: And they have no new ideas, and they're repeating it, trying to see if it can work for themselves. That just goes to show you, that's a party in disarray. They are completely disconnected from the voters once again. It didn't work with Hillary Clinton.
And by the way, that wig looked more like Hillary Clinton. That's why I was confused. I was like --
KILMEADE: Right. It was confusing.
GUILFOYLE: And fine. So he can sing and dance, whatever. OK. That's perfect, because he might be needing to do that going forward, because I don't know if it's going to work out with lack of ideas for the DNC.
KILMEADE: Well, and we're still in but two in three are happy with the economy. And overall, consumer confidence is up to a 17-year high. So these are positives. But as you know, if we were doing the show in January, we were wearing coats and he a little slow to get on, then it looked as though it was double digits.
WILLIAMS: Yes, you should check out retirements and fund-raising on the Democratic side. Looking good. But you know, Republicans.
GUILFOYLE: Republicans have a ton of money. Yes.
KILMEADE: All right. Twenty-six minutes before the top of the hour. Controversy is --
GUTFELD: Who are you?
KILMEADE: -- brewing over the Starbucks, over the change, "no purchase necessary" story.
GUTFELD: What are you, on radio?
GUTFELD: All right. Starbucks just announced a new policy that lets people hang out and use the bathroom without ever having to buy anything. This was their PR response to that big screw-up when two black men were arrested for hanging around in one cafe in Philly.
Now, Starbucks, realizing they just sent an open invite to the nation's homeless, now says sleeping, drug or alcohol use will not be tolerated.
So how will this work? Well, like panicky responses, the consequences won't be borne by the execs. The CEO won't be on the front lines. He'll be too busy monitoring his company's Twitter feed. Instead, baristas, people making far less money than the consultants, will be forced to ask other patrons if someone's behavior bothers them before taking action.
So this whole thing is going to end up looking like a rerun from "COPS." And it puts pressure on employees and later the police will be blamed by both the unruly patrons and social justice warriors now present at these overpriced coffee temples.
As you know, 8,000-plus locations will shut next Tuesday for unconscious bias training. I call it a 'woke-uccino.' Unconscious bias training. You see the trick there? If this is unconscious, how can you deny your bias? It's automatic and invisible, so you can't know you're a bigot. Only in today's PC's America could a coffeeshop decide that it's the moral conscience of the nation.
So Starbucks, keep the new $7 Virtue Signal Vente. We drink coffee to be awake, not woke.
GUILFOYLE: That was a good one.
GUTFELD: Thank you.
GUILFOYLE: That should be in your next book, Volume Two.
GUTFELD: Thank you. I have a book coming out now of monologues I'd like to share with society.
KILMEADE: Get the full screen.
GUTFELD: OK, Juan, this puts the responsibility on the baristas, who just want to sell coffee. And they're going to end up being mental health professionals. In New York, there are people that are unstable who come into these places, and it can be pretty ugly. You can't put that kind of pressure on people.
WILLIAMS: You are -- you're cranky today, so I'm going to forgive a lot.
GUILFOYLE: Well, he's got a sore throat.
WILLIAMS: He's got a sore throat?
WILLIAMS: We love you, but you're cranky today.
So anyway, I just want to say, this is a rare moment when I agree with you, because I'm a regular Starbucks customer. And but the thing is, Greg, I go in and I get upset if I can't use the bathroom because it's occupied.
WILLIAMS: Or someone is in there for hours. But I also get upset when I can't find a place to sit or even stand, because guess what? It's not homeless people. But it's oftentimes young people. They've got their computers. They've got this and that.
Now, I will say that -- So I get upset. But then I feel like, you know what? I am a privileged little snot, because my wife said to me and other people have said to me that Starbucks intentionally created a culture where they're a coffee shop. They are the so-called third place where you can meet your friends, where you can have debates, where you can work.
And then all of a sudden, you say, "Well, but that guy looks kind of threatening or that guy looks like he's poor, and he can't be in here." Well, that's a contradiction. And then all of a sudden, you do get involved in, are those two guys who are asking to use the bathroom just bums or are they just two businessmen?
GUILFOYLE: Hello, hello, hello. Two words. Dunkin' Donuts.
PERINO: All right.
GUILFOYLE: There goes the sources (ph). Let me tell you, if they're going to act like this with the nonsense, so no one's trying to discriminate. Are you buying something in there? Do you have something you would like to purchase to stimulate the economy, or do you just want to come in and clogged the toilet and take all the tables? I've had it.
GUTFELD: By the way, it's -- Brian, you can't -- imagine doing this at any restaurant, where you walk in and go, "I'm just going to hang out." You can't. You go to a Greek diner in midtown, they'll throw you out out.
KILMEADE: In another language.
GUTFELD: But it's a restaurant.
GUTFELD: I will say this. This one, is this your best block in a long time. You're down three different roads, and I'm totally in -- I can't beat this. But I would say I -- fundamentally, I cannot use somebody's bathroom or get changed to pay a -- to pay a toll unless I buy something from that store. I just know that that's it.
PERINO: Your parents taught you that.
KILMEADE: you just know it --
GUILFOYLE: Isn't it courteous? Right? If you go in to use the 7-Eleven bathroom, and you know, buy a Snickers.
KILMEADE: By the way, the Starbucks -- the Starbucks and the Dunkin' Donuts have something in common. Their bathrooms are way too big. You can land a helicopter in them. You just need a small bathroom.
GUTFELD: I like the big bathrooms.
KILMEADE: You do?
GUTFELD: Oh, yes.
GUILFOYLE: There is going to be a lawsuit, just like, you know, somebody is going to be injured or stabbed and then that's it for this.
KILMEADE: Or you woke up. Or you're going to have to make our own coffee.
GUTFELD: You know, Brian, there's somebody over here. This ain't no "FOX & Friends." All right?
Dana, this is actually a failure of society and a way to figure out what to do with the homeless. This is, like, our Band-Aid.
PERINO: Well, a couple things. One, this falls into my P.R. law that every overreaction will cause an equal or greater overreaction.
GUTFELD: That should be in your book.
PERINO: And this was going to -- I'll write a new book, maybe. Put this back in there. I am for better and more public restrooms. OK? It doesn't have to be at somebody's private business. But if this private business decides that this is what it wants to do this, OK, knock yourselves out. But I would rather go to Dunkin'.
GUTFELD: Yes. There you go. I think we solved one of the world's greatest problems. Like Dunkin' Donuts. Maybe they will send us some stuff.
KILMEADE: Before the show is over.
GUTFELD: Yes, yes, yes.
GUILFOYLE: I would like to make a suggestion for some Febreze in the bathroom.
GUTFELD: It just covers it up, Kimberly.
Should bosses crack down on employees' obsessive cell phone use? Let's debate next.
WILLIAMS: New studies are revealing some shocking information about just how addicted we all are to our cell phones. A recent one finds that the average person touches, pokes, pinches and swipes their phone --
PERINO: What do you mean, pinches?
WILLIAMS: -- over 2,600 times a day. It's unbelievable. Because of this, one CEO is banning them in meetings, and others are trying to limit their employees' phone use.
Now, we sit here at this desk. And there are four cell phones on the desk. Let me just tell you --
GUILFOYLE: And an iPad.
WILLIAMS: So what do you think, Kimberly? It's a good idea to ban him?
GUILFOYLE: Well, I mean, it makes sense. Right?
KILMEADE: It does.
GUILFOYLE: Because then you just can't reach out. You can't touch them. You can't, you know, resist the temptation. I don't know. I just like to get things done, organize, make lists, like always updating things. So I'm always trying to get something done. I don't like downtime too much.
But yes, I think if you're in a meeting and pay attention, et cetera, then maybe it's like a good little line in a meeting.
WILLIAMS: Brian, in fact, picking up on what Kimberly said, according to the studies, you have a lower level of cognitive performance if your mobile phone is on the desk.
KILMEADE: This is the biggest issue in America today, because everyone has a phone. No matter how rich or poor you are, everyone's got a phone, and it's distracting. It's like, hey, you guys are OK, but the people here are more important.
KILMEADE: And I think this boss is doing a great thing in all of them, he or she is, by allowing us -- making us put this away, so I have no choice. I will get in trouble if I put it away.
GUILFOYLE: By the way, you have two, all the time. On "FOX & Friends." All the time when I used to fill in for you.
KILMEADE: Can I just be a commentator and not my personal life?
GUILFOYLE: Your personal ---
KILMEADE: But it is -- but it is a problem, Kimberly.
GUILFOYLE: I know.
KILMEADE: I'll telling you, I would just wonder how many times I would use it, any of us would use it if we weren't in the news.
WILLIAMS: So Dana, so I learned a new word today. Nomo-phobia. Which means no mobile phones make you afraid.
PERINO: They like their --
WILLIAMS: You want your phone. You want to know what's going on.
PERINO: I would say, if you're a recent graduate and you've just got a new job in the great new economy, if you want to get promoted, start today on the first job, do not take your cell phone to any meetings. Don't take it out. And you will be noticed, and it will be recognized.
GUILFOYLE: This is a very good tip for a minute.
KILMEADE: This is just going great, this block.
PERINO: I'll put that in my yew book, too.
WILLIAMS: Greg, do you disagree?
GUTFELD: No. I -- there's research that shows, like, the brain's function is to be attentive. And you can try this anytime you want. Try to pay attention to more than one thing. It's impossible. It's why we get obsessed over things. If somebody introduces a thought into your head, you will think about it and you will not be able to think about anything else.
You can say you're listening to your spouse while you're watching a game, but you're actually switching. It's imperceptible. But you're actually switching, and so you're actually missing out on important things.
And this is actually pretty deadly. If you look at the -- as the stuff has come out with driving and texting, it's probably one of the most dangerous combinations you're going to find. And I don't know what -- what the numbers, but it's pretty close to --
GUILFOYLE: What about you, show hosting and on Twitter?
GUTFELD: What do you mean?
GUILFOYLE: Freaking out.
GUTFELD: I do it during break so I don't have to talk to you people.
WILLIAMS: Now we know how you really feel.
GUILFOYLE: Can we stay on commercial break?
WILLIAMS: So, we have "One More Thing" to make you laugh. That's next om "The Five."
PERINO: Time now for "One More Thing." We're going to skip Brian until the last one. You get to go first.
WILLIAMS: Oh, thanks.
WILLIAMS: Anyway --
WILLIAMS: You know what? Life is full of surprises, and yesterday I got a happy one. It was a very proud moment when I learned that my biography of former Supreme Court justice Thurgood Marshall was named one of the 40 best biographies of all time --
WILLIAMS: -- by BookClub.com.
WILLIAMS: So take a look at this classic C-SPAN interview I did 20 years ago, in 1998, when the book came out.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
WILLIAMS: I had a real privilege, Brian. I got to interview Marshall for a six-month period in 1989. This was at the end of his career, end of his life. It was a rich time, and one in which he was willing to talk. I felt -- you know, it's been a great gift for me.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
WILLIAMS: So the book has continued to steadily sell and was reissued for the 50th anniversary of Brown v. Board. So for me, just on a personal basis, let me just say thank you and it's a thrill to be among America's greatest biographers. I can't believe it.
GUTFELD: I'm glad I could help you with that book.
GUILFOYLE: The book's in the White House.
WILLIAMS: There you go.
PERINO: That's really impressive, Juan. Congratulations.
PERINO: All right. I've got one. Too bad Jesse isn't here, because he would have been impressed with this one.
All right. Mary Sedgwick, she's been legally blind since 2003, and she recently got the chance to see her guide dog for the first time, thanks to a pair of high-tech glasses.
PERINO: And she shared the video of her very emotional moment. Watch this.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
MARU SEDGWICK, LEGALLY BLIND: Lucy! Look at your eyes, Lucy! Oh!
(END VIDEO CLIP)
PERINO: Well, those of us who are animal lovers -- and I don't mean MS-13 -- animal lovers will love that. She put in an online post that "There are no words to describe how I felt when I saw the face of my beloved family and friends and the beautiful soulful eyes of Lucy for the first time."
She was a medical student, and she was -- she had dreams of being a doctor. In her fourth year at school, that was when her blindness began. But she says now, with these new glasses she hopes to return to work in the medical field. And we wish her a lot of luck.
GUILFOYLE: This is excellent.
GUILFOYLE: That's a very moving moment. Very happy for her.
So I have a very cute "One More Thing." And it's about seven Glenpool firefighters. And they welcomed new babies all within one year. Seven of Oklahoma's bravest not only battle the blazes but also change diapers and make bottles.
GUILFOYLE: In less than a year, seven out of the 20 from this Glenpool Fire Department in Glenpool, Oklahoma, as it turns out, became new dads. And so they decided to commemorate the special occasion with group photos that came from one of the firefighters' wives. So they waited for the last child to be born. So they go -- oldest is 15 months, youngest is four weeks. Obviously, was probably pretty difficult to get all those babies to be looking in the same direction at the same time.
So congratulations to them. And God bless their families.
PERINO: That's a great story.
GUILFOYLE: So cute, right?
GUTFELD: All right. Now for actual news.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
GRAPHIC: Greg's Cable News
(END VIDEO CLIP)
GUTFELD: "Greg's Cable News."
All right, as you know, CNN has been in a lot, a lot of ratings trouble. God knows what's going to happen to them. So they've decided -- they've decided -- CNN has decided to bring back "Crossfire" for the third time. And here's a clip. I've got a preview.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
(TWO ANIMALS HOWLING AT EACH OTHER)
(END VIDEO CLIP)
KILMEADE: Which one's Tucker?
GUTFELD: Here we go. Here we go. I'm telling you, you put this on at 8 p.m., CNN, you're going to get huge ratings. So don't keep it at 5. Put it at 8.
GUILFOYLE: Oh, my goodness.
PERINO: All right.
GUILFOYLE: It's not going to work, because they don't have Tucker Carlson.
KILMEADE: Well, let's talk greatness. Let's talk soccer. First off, Cristiano Rinaldo, he is the best player, maybe, in the world today. Everyone laughed when they looked at his bust. They said, "What are you doing? Are you mocking him? And I thought that was as lowest they can go. And now comes -- now comes Brandi Chastain. Remember Brandi Chastain, one of the finest women soccer players ever? Eight-eight caps. Excuse me, 192 caps, on the national team from '88 to 2004.
GUTFELD: We don't know what that means.
KILMEADE: That means playing in the national -- in the national game.
Well, she's so great, they put her into the Bay Area Sports Hall of Fame. That's the good news.
GUILFOYLE: Oh, my God.
KILMEADE: But look at the picture.
GUTFELD: No, that's not her.
KILMEADE: That is her. Sometimes it's better not to be great if that's how you're going to be depicted for all time.
PERINO: Like, you could draw her better on the back of your folder. Than that.
KILMEADE: People say that might be Babe Ruth on a bad day.
KILMEADE: Brandi Chastain is a beautiful woman.
GUILFOYLE: That's not very nice.
KILMEADE: She demands better.
GUILFOYLE: That's not very nice.
PERINO: They should redo that.
KILMEADE: It's so great not to be great because no one will ever do that for me.
PERINO: All right. Set your DVRs. Never miss an episode of "The Five." "Special Report" is up next.
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