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To summarize the Golden Globes, women wore black. Men wore pins. People used words like "intersectional gender parity."

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DEBRA MESSING, ACTRESS: We want intersectional gender parity.

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GUTFELD: Yes. Nothing like messing on the carpet.

This script was set: A show of unity condemning abuses most in Hollywood had ignored for decades. It's about time. I don't think I can take another standing ovation for a child rapist. But when everyone gets the memo it makes the memo less powerful, one form of lockstep becomes another. But Hollywood therapy is always projection: Lecturing us on us when what's really wrong is Hollywood. For example, Connie Britton's shirt that reads "poverty is sexist." While it's true at least 60 percent of our homeless are men, I'm not sure that what she meant. But my point is this: It makes no sense to inject identity politics into shared suffering, unless of course it looks good on a shirt.

"The Handmaid's Tale won -- it was a horror fantasy were women are routinely abused. Keep the handmaid's tale from becoming real, says the guy who won. Sadly he wasn't referring to Iran. I think he meant us, because Hollywood tends to miss the real abuses: Iran, Venezuela, the USSR, Cuba -- they're always the last to know or care.

Then came Oprah, a planned, strong speech designed to bring moral clarity to an immoral terrain:

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OPRAH WINFREY: For too long, women have not been heard or believed if they dared to speak their truth to the power of those men. But their time is up.

(APPLAUSE)

I want all the girls watching here now to know that a new day is on the horizon!

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GUTFELD: It went on. The "Time's Up" button didn't apply to her. But it was genius for having Oprah on. It made the night about her not and the scandals. Even NBC called her the next president. That sounds familiar:

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GUTFELD: What about Biden and Oprah?

DANA PERINO, CO-HOST: Oh, that's a ticket!

GUTFELD: Nominate Oprah, she wins. No, I'm not kidding. It's just like just skip it all, get to the point. Put Oprah up there. She wins. You don't even hold the election. It's over.

Oprah is an icon who, unlike traditional politicians, could match a wild card like Donald Trump. And if she won, she could give everyone a free car.

2020, Juan, Oprah versus Donald. Best, greatest election ever, correct?

Oprah-Franken

KIMBERLY GUILFOYLE, CO-HOST: And a woman ran for president of the United States and, if she wasn't such a bad candidate, maybe she would have won. Condoleezza Rice would have done better.

GUTFELD: Should have been Oprah

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Seriously, President Oprah is the best idea Hollywood has. Well, it's maybe the only one they have left.