This is a rush transcript from "The Five," February 24, 2017. This copy may not be in its final form and may be updated.
KIMBERLY GUILFOYLE, CO-HOST: Hello, everyone, we have got a big surprise announcement, so don't move away from your TV. I'm Kimberly Guilfoyle along with Juan Williams, Eric Bolling, Greg Gutfeld, and Dana Perino. It's 5 o'clock in New York City. And this is "The Five."
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
DONALD TRUMP, PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES: I have been with CPAC for a long time, all of these years, we've been together. And now you finally have a president, finally. It took you a long time.
TRUMP: Took you a long time. And it is patriots like you that made it happen, believe me, believe me. They all underestimated the power of the people, you, and the people proved them totally wrong.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
GUILFOYLE: The 45th president of the United States firing up the crowd at CPAC today, the annual gathering of conservatives. He received a very warm welcome, and here are more words of optimism from the president to its energized party earlier.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
TRUMP: But I am here to tell you what this movement means for the future of the Republican Party and for the future of America. The core conviction of our movement is that we are a nation that put and will put its own citizens first. Now is the time for action. We will cut wasteful spending. We will promote our values. We will rebuild our inner cities. We will bring back our jobs and our dreams. The GOP will be, from now on, the party also of the American worker. We have an amazing, strong, powerful party that truly does want to see America be great again, and it will see it, and it's going to see it a lot sooner than you think.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
GUILFOYLE: All right. So a lot more red meat today offered up from the president of the United States, and people were hungry. They have an appetite for it. Eric, it went over very well with his base, much like we saw yesterday.
ERIC BOLLING, CO-HOST: I couldn't believe he didn't get a standing ovation though. I'm kidding, they stood, and they sit down, and they stood up again, he said sit down. But the media wasn't going to report the standing ovation.
DANA PERINO, CO-HOST: It was standing room only.
BOLLING: It was very crowded. Dana is right. It was very crowded. I'll give you that. I didn't hear any new policy. It was firing up the people that loved him. That is what CPAC is. I thought it was interesting he said, I will be back as often as I can next year and the year after. It was promising. You know, we touched on it a little bit yesterday, the CPAC crowd has been historically or had been recently very libertarian-leaning.
BOLLING: I don't know that there is a lot of libertarianism in Donald Trump's presidency, but this crowd loved him, they were engaged, clapping, they stood up, they yelled, they hooted. It was a hometown crowd.
GUILFOYLE: All right, Dana, what did you make of it compared to years past?
PERINO: Well, he didn't go last year, remember.
GUTFELD: Yeah, but in terms of the crowd.
PERINO: I think parties change and politics change, and some people are excited about it and others are sort of reluctant, but may be excited. I thought it was interesting today that one of the best things that he has done so far, in my opinion, has been his nomination of Neil Gorsuch for Supreme Court nominee. He didn't even mention it today, but I think he would have gotten more applause had he done so. I think that nomination is assured to be confirmed. I think we would even hear whisperings from other Supreme Court justices--
PERINO: He is a good guy, he is qualified, so I think that was something he could have done. The other thing, I think this is sort of one of the last times, at least in a forum like this, where the president will give a speech in terms of looking backwards to the campaign because starting Tuesday night, when he will give a primetime address or joint session of Congress, this is where he starts to put some meat on the bones. The policies he's been talking about. And so, the speech next year that he gives, he is hoping, and I think maybe the people that support them hope, that maybe he will be able to take off a few things that say -- that shows the accomplishments that he was able to make in that first year. So next year's speech will be very different to this one.
GUILFOYLE: All right, Greg, any highlights for you and something that perhaps he should have brought up or left out?
GREG GUTFELD, CO-HOST: I thought his speech was the best speech since the Gettysburg address.
GUTFELD: It was better, it was better. He makes Abe Lincoln sound Abe Vigoda. That's how good he is.
GUILFOYLE: Perfect. So you would have been standing.
GUTFELD: Actually, the one thing I find refreshing--
GUTFELD: It's a first, a first that conservative gatherings aren't miserable. Generally, the audience, it is a good audience but they have people who are very dead serious. And to his credit, Trump brings humor and excitement to the group. What he does, it's like The Five. It's like what we do for a living. We take really boring crap and we boil it down like entertaining nuggets.
GUTFELD: That is what he does. He takes the stuff that has normally been presented as dry and he boils down to these little sharp funny nuggets where Obama has the story rhetoric, Trump has like these raw punch-lines that you just kind of laugh and you go, and you start looking at the people around you. Everybody seems to be having a good time. And I also thought there was an evolution in this speech where he mixed talking points and riffing off the script, which he is doing better. He is now playing rhythm and lead guitar as he plays all of his big hits like the wall, Obamacare, fair trade, those are the classic ones that he does, you know, it's a medley.
PERINO: Everybody knows the words.
GUTFELD: Everybody knows the words and they clap.
BOLLING: I like it when he goes lead though.
GUTFELD: Abe Lincoln couldn't do that.
BOLLING: In this speech today, maybe in others as well, the way he delivers a line, not a policy line, not a written line, just the way he delivers it, it's the way everyone in that audience would be talking to a friend over a cup of coffee or over dinner. I think that's why the billionaire from Madison or Fifth Avenue is the people's choice, the populous choice. How is that possible? Because he speaks the way we speak, the way we speak, not the way politicians speak.
GUILFOYLE: Juan, does it work for you?
JUAN WILLIAMS, CO-HOST: Wow, he's the populous choice. Let me just say, I don't think most Americans didn't vote for him. And if you look at the polls these days, wow, he is clattering, you know it is just not good.
WILLIAMS: No, you look at the real clear politics average. They can have it, 38, 39, 40, something like that.
WILLIAMS: Hang on. Let me just speak for a second. I know you don't like it, but, come on. It seems to need today, more campaigning, it was another campaign speech. I wonder how many campaign speeches he is going to give.
GUILFOYLE: A lot.
WILLIAMS: It just goes on and on. It is stream of consciousness. You know, at some point, I would expecting he would be presidential, he would start to act like the president.
BOLLING: When we expect that?
BOLLING: Everyone told you he was going to be Donald Trump.
WILLIAMS: He said, I'm going to be so presidential.
BOLLING: He can't win the general election, unless he pivots and becomes more presidential.
WILLIAMS: He won and he said to all of us, and I believe he said and you heard it, I am going to be so presidential, you will not believe it.
WILLIAMS: But he has not presidential.
GUTFELD: These speeches, they create two competing realities. You can have two groups of people who see two completely different things.
GUTFELD: Somebody says, this is fun, it is great. And the other person says, that is a load of crap. Somewhere, it is in the middle. Life is in the middle of both extremes. We've got to quit saying he is the worst guy in the world and he's the greatest guy in the world because you're actually just canceling each other out.
BOLLING: People who don't like him say he has got to pivot, he has to change.
WILLIAMS: If he wants to speak directly and off-the-cup and go after everybody, right, right, and say things that really aren't true, OK. But at least know that I want to have confidence in the president that he is governing, that he has got control of the country, and when he does stuff like today, oh, I was right about Sweden and the nasty press was wrong.
GUILFOYLE: This is CPAC, not the State of the Union.
GUTFELD: He is talking about what is happening there, the immigrant crisis he was referring to. It turned out he was right.
GUTFELD: All the mockery went away the next day.
WILLIAMS: You're kidding me.
GUTFELD: Swedish politicians backed him up, two leading Democrats did.
GUTFELD: Maybe we should give you an article from the Wall Street Journal.
WILLIAMS: No, no, I saw what you're talking about, but I don't like anybody backed him up on this.
GUILFOYLE: All right, light it up here, Juan. The president picked another opportunity to share his feelings about the mainstream media. Here is that.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
TRUMP: I want to also know we are fighting the fake news. It's fake, phony, fake. A few days ago, I called the fake news the enemy of the people. And they are. They are the enemy of the people. Because they have no sources, they just make them up when there are none. But I am only against the fake news, media or press, fake, fake.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
GUILFOYLE: All right. A few hours later, more tensions unfolded with the press after CNN, the New York Times, and other news outlets were kept out of the White House gaggle today. So, Dana, this is kind of big breaking news throughout the day, a lot of people talking about it. What do you think happened here and did you ever do that?
PERINO: Well, I'm not exactly sure what happened. I sort of read the reports about it. I agree with Bret Baier, who is the White House -- I'm sorry, chief political correspondent here and the anchor of Special Report that a gaggle is open for everybody. A gaggle basically, yes, it is a press briefing without a camera.
PERINO: You can have different meetings for different people. I think one of the problems is, a couple, one, they said it would be a gaggle today and everyone would be invited, then they changed that and only called certain news outlets to say that you are invited. Then some reporters got in, they're like, why are these other people here? It becomes a whole thing, a whole story and it steps on the message for the weekend. Even though they might think that it makes them look strong, because they're punching back against the mainstream media, I actually think that it was a stumble. I don't think it will happen again. I could be wrong. I think they should feel confident in their answers and be able to answer them. Because now, what you have is other reporters saying, I wouldn't do that. In 2009, President Obama tried to get Fox News blocked.
GUILFOYLE: That is what Bret Baier is referring to.
PERINO: And other outlets there said, (ph) no, you're not going to be able to do that. We know you don't like Fox News or what they say, but that is not going to stand with us. And so, I think it won't happen again.
GUILFOYLE: You didn't retweet that.
PERINO: Can I say one other thing? A former press secretary said you can't have -- there are instances where you have briefings where you might just invite a few reporters. Way back when the news weeklies were actually weeklies, I remember the White House communications director would meet with them, I think that's every Thursday, so that we could try to shape the message for those newsmagazines that came out on Sundays. As soon as the 24/7 news cycle took hold, that went away, it wasn't necessary anymore. So I don't think that reasoning or excuse actually holds up.
BOLLING: Look, I do not see the big deal. I'm not allowed in the women's locker room at Gold's gym. It's not that I'm uninvited or barred, I'm just not allowed in there. I don't see the point in this.
PERINO: That makes absolutely no sense.
GUTFELD: Imagine the guys, the women, and other reporters, already in there, and wondering where the other people are. It is like when somebody invites them and having a bunch of people over and you show up, and you're the only person, have you ever done that?
GUILFOYLE: Or the time you were just invited from Dana's Thanksgiving soiree?
GUTFELD: Oh, yeah, but I'm used to that.
GUTFELD: I honestly think there is not a lot here. So what?
BOLLING: I'm going to disagree with that. Let me put it this way. I doubt this came from President Trump. This feels like it is a comms departmental call, for whatever reason, there may be trial balloon, to see how this is going over. I have to side with the media, with the press, saying they should have access, every single credentialed media should have had access to that briefing, whatever it was.
PERINO: Or don't call it a gaggle.
BOLLING: Have a briefing. Don't call on certain groups you don't like--
WILLIAMS: I think there is another element which is this happened right after Trump gives a speech in which he goes after the press very aggressively, right. He says, you guys have sources, I don't believe the sources.
WILLIAMS: He says basically repeats Bannon's argument that the press is a corporate media and the corporate media got the campaign wrong. And now, corporate media, shut up.
WILLIAMS: Shut up. To me, this is beyond like normally, I could be adversarial with Dana and Dana is the press secretary.
PERINO: You wouldn't dare.
WILLIAMS: No, not with you.
WILLIAMS: But I got to tell you, this is really threatening.
GUTFELD: Is it really threatening? We're talking about it. No one is being silenced. We're making a huge deal out of it.
GUILFOYLE: All right, good.
GUTFELD: The hypocrisy of these stupid stories about him complaining about the press, no one ever shuts up about it.
WILLIAMS: Here is the thing. The opposition party, and today you have stories that, again, no sources, even by the way the Trump White House has briefings and says, we want this off the record or whatever. But guess what, stories about Reince Priebus asking the FBI, hey, can you knock down these stories about Russia and intelligence?
GUILFOYLE: Juan jumping the shark again.
GUILFOYLE: All right. So bottom-line, obviously have a good day, yesterday, today at CPAC. The president also got the crowd going when he mentioned Obamacare and what he is going to do to fix the disaster that he inherited. Hear that next.
And later, a big, huge announcement coming your way. Plus, Facebook Friday, post your questions on facebook.com/thefivefnc.
BOLLING: Back now to President Trump's electrifying address at CPAC today. The president follows through on his promises and he vowed to a room filled with conservatives earlier, there will be a repeal and replacement of Obamacare.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
TRUMP: I inherited a mess, believe me. We also inherited a failed healthcare law that threatens our medical system with absolute and total catastrophe. We're changing it. We're going to make it much better, we're going to make it less expensive. Two years, don't do anything. The Democrats will come to us and beg for help, they'll beg and it's their problem. But it's not the right thing to do for the American people. It's not the right thing to do.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
BOLLING: But not all Republicans are as confident as the president that Obamacare will get a full overhaul. Former house speaker John Boehner drew some shade at the party's effort yesterday.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
JOHN BOEHNER, FORMER HOUSE SPEAKER: They will fix Obamacare. I shouldn't call it repeal and replace because that's not what is going to happen. Trying to fix the flaws and put a more conservative box around it.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
BOLLING: OK. Dana, your thoughts, who is going to get this one right?
PERINO: Well, I read a quote from Jim McDermott, who is a big-time Democrat, he said the joke around Washington is that the Republicans are going to repeal Obamacare and they will place it with the Affordable Care Act.
BOLLING: Very nice.
PERINO: And it is super complicated. I think they are going to do something. And then the details of that will be revealed. And then you also have the sequencing of tax reform. March is going to be one heck of a month for these guys.
BOLLING: Oh, it is. Think about how they're going to get Obamacare repealed and replaced and tax reform all done.
BOLLING: Some of the things he recommended here at this table would be, let's just kill the mandate portion of Obamacare.
BOLLING: Eliminate the must do and the penalty phase. The question is, how do you pay for it?
GUILFOYLE: Oh, how do you pay for it, that is the problem. You have a certain segment of the population. You need these services, then you're penalizing those that are healthy, that say, let me do cost benefit analysis here. This mass does not work out. I'm being penalized. I would rather take this share of money and allocate it to other areas of my life that I might be able to use it, that are more necessary for me. So it is flawed in the sense that it is structured to begin with. Now, there is one school of thought, just let it fail. Then millions of Americans will be out of healthcare. They won't have insurance. So that is the problem right there. Because ultimately, this is not sustainable long-term because they do not have the money to be able to keep this going. And that is the problem.
WILLIAMS: Well, I think the reason they don't have the money is because Republicans have taken away a lot of the substance that was going to be given to the health insurance companies intentionally to protect them in case they didn't have enough healthy people signing up. And, by the way, I was shocked today, Eric Bolling, when I looked at what Paul Ryan was proposing, there were leaks of his draft proposal, and in it he said, oh, my gosh, I hope Eric Bolling saw this, he's going to penalize people who don't have coverage. Oh, my gosh, Eric, we are back to the mandate.
BOLLING: Back to the mandate.
WILLIAMS: Back to the mandate that you so hate. Let me finish on that.
BOLLING: I would push back against the penalty.
BOLLING: But there are other ways to do it. You don't need the penalty, which should be to provide competition to drop prices.
WILLIAMS: That's fine. The other thing, I just want to mention, as we move along, the town halls this week. I think Republican saw there is real theory on the street about if you take this away, you are going to hurt, and the polls are the first time are showing it.
GUTFELD: It is the genius of social programs. They're like getting gum in your hair, it is intractable, unless you have peanut butter, then you cut it out.
GUILFOYLE: Good thing you have lots of that.
GUTFELD: The thing is, too, the Republicans, you got what he wished for, it's an opportunity. Now, you are there, you can shoot the lion, it is in your scope, you have a clean shot, and now, you don't have the stomach for it, because it may be, like Boehner suggested, maybe you really didn't want it. Nobody wants to be Reverse Santa. That is why it is so easy to be a liberal, because you are Santa, and Republicans are always the Reverse Santa. We got to take away the present, we got to find a better present because now we are addicted to the present.
BOLLING: OK, let's do this. Lets save some time. We have some really cool blocks coming up. Next, the White House is signaling, it could be cracking down eventually on marijuana use.
BOLLING: -- even in states that have legalized the drug for recreational purposes. That is coming up on The Five.
WILLIAMS: President Trump wants to make all kinds of sweeping changes, the great disruptor, but will he soon be altering the federal government's current position on marijuana? Yesterday, the White House indicated the president may seek to prosecute recreational marijuana usage and sales under federal law. The Obama administration didn't interfere after eight states and the District of Columbia enacted laws to about non-medicinal pot use. If the Trump administration does intervene, it would be an interesting move considering they are now trying to send transgender rights back to the state. Greg, what do you think of this?
GUTFELD: It is stupid. I'm not a pot smoker. I find it actually annoying. But this is a huge mistake. It is a product of old, destructive thinking, and it directs a huge amount of human energy to a non-solution. You are criminalizing a desire for oblivion, which we all have, and we find it either in alcohol, dope, golf, pets--
PERINO: Or cable news.
GUTFELD: Or cable news, exactly. And criminalizing a desire for it does not reduce the use. It only criminalizes people and helps create the criminalizing machinery like drug gangs. So this is a bad idea. And we all know that he wasn't a libertarian but, come on, man.
WILLIAMS: Well, in fact though, he said in 2013, it would be a state's rate issue. It seems to have changed. Dana, Sean Spicer, the White House press secretary said today, it could be linked to the rise in opioid abuse, something I know you care deeply about. But the statistics don't back that up. What do you think?
PERINO: Well, I don't disagree with everything that Greg said, also not a pot smoker, never was.
GUTFELD: Oh, yeah.
PERINO: I know that there are some states that voted for it. I'm not there yet. This is where I am. I think it is--
PERINO: And where if congress doesn't like it, they should pass a law against it. So the attorney general, when he went through his confirmation hearings, was asked, will you prosecute the laws of the United States faithfully. And he said, yes, I will. The question about this is that Congress has never taken marijuana off the illegal substance books. So if Congress doesn't want the administration to prosecute this as a crime, then it should pass a law to do so. Otherwise, I think General Sessions is absolutely within his rights.
PERINO: And doing what he said he would do.
WILLIAMS: I think a number of Republicans from California said they asked him, are you going to leave alone the states. And he apparently indicated he would. But, Eric, now, it looks like a lot of this is coming from Attorney General Sessions.
BOLLING: Yeah. He has been anti-marijuana for a long time. I have been out there saying again, I don't smoke pot either.
BOLLING: But I am in favor of decriminalizing it and legalizing it. I think we are in a day and age where it is time to do that. I don't understand why the feds--
GUILFOYLE: Well, you the money aspect of it too.
BOLLING: Why the feds -- the what?
GUILFOYLE: You like the money aspect of it if you that, put it into the revenue stream.
BOLLING: This is why this is bad idea right now. Yeah, I think it should be all about states rights. I get that also. But now what are you going to do? You have some -- you have Colorado and Washington who have been doing business in marijuana for years. You have eight are or so other states that are involved. How many jobs are associated with the legalized pot industry?
PERINO: How much cost is the hospital?
BOLLING: Are you going to cut all those jobs? Look, I think this is -- the Department of Justice, I'm not sure Donald Trump is one came down and said, "This is what I want to enforce: But remember, what President Obama did, we didn't pull the laws of the books. He said, "We will review defer to later date whether or not we're going to enforce it." Basically telling the DOJ, we're not going to enforce this.
WILLIAMS: Right. But I think what the Obama people did, Kimberly, was --
WILLIAMS: -- stop the gangs, no distribution across state lines, no sale to minors. So it was kind of saying, you know what, it's up to the states. But we're going to enforce the federal across state and sales to minor issues and try to break the criminal --
GUILFOYLE: Limited enforcement.
WILLIAMS: -- the criminal conspiracy.
GUILFOYLE: Sure, I understand. But them, you know, that becomes a little bit challenging and it's complicated. And so there was a bit of a limited enforcement, because this was not something that they really wanted to do. They do not like prosecute and uphold the rules, the laws that were on the books. What you're seeing here is consistent with Sessions' policy, I believe what Dana said. So he is going to do what he feels is right which is uphold the law. That's the oath that he took. And he's actually going to follow it. In my opinion, that's refreshing because that's not what you saw Eric Holder do. He politicized, you know, the DOJ. And, you know, everyone was huffing and puffing about it. And now, you see someone saying, "Hey, listen, we are not going to arbitrarily enforce laws, whether we like them politically or not."
WILLIAMS: One last more question for you, though.
WILLIAMS: The public opinion polls on this are pretty clear. Even Republicans don't want it. They're saying, leave it alone.
GUILFOYLE: Yeah, no, I understand. It's a mixed bag. I also speak, you know, from personal experience as a former prosecutor and seeing just the tie in and this nexus between people who started smoking pot leading to other drugs. I know there's a lot of research and different opinions on that. But I know what I saw in Los Angeles, I know what I saw in San Francisco. And, you know, it's not just like dabble in one and --
BOLLING: Are we going to expect lots of people up for that production? I mean we are already going --
GUILFOYLE: I'm not saying production, but for drug trafficking?
GUTFELD: That's right. This is a moral stand.
GUILFOYLE: That people that are distributing --
GUTFELD: Arresting people for putting something in their bodies is immoral? It's immoral across the board?
WILLIAMS: All right.
GUILFOYLE: What about people -- I mean drug trafficking --
GUTFELD: And that's the largest question here.
GUILFOYLE: -- and is included with heroine and methamphetamine.
GUTFELD: You lose the drug trafficking once it's legal.
WILLIAMS: Well, yeah.
GUTFELD: Don't you get it? Prohibition, people. Read your books.
WILLIAMS: Wow. OK. Thank you, guys.
GUILFOYLE: Maybe somebody ought to --
WILLIAMS: Don't go anywhere. Facebook Friday is up next. Plus, don't forget, we have a huge, big surprise for you at home. It's an announcement you won't want to miss.
GUTFELD: Yeah, it's Facebook --
WILLIAMS: "Family Feud."
GUTFELD: Facebook Friday.
GUILFOYLE: Remember we wanted to be on there? Why aren't we?
GUTFELD: Kimberly, don't try to derail this segment. It hasn't even started yet.
All right. First question from Karen K. If you could wake up tomorrow having gained one quality or ability, what would it be? Let's go this way. Dana?
PERINO: I'd like to be fluent in a couple of different languages.
GUTFELD: So you'd like to have the skill without actually having to learn it?
GUTFELD: Oh, very good.
PERINO: Instant skill.
GUTFELD: Instant skill.
PERINO: Just add water.
GUTFELD: That's going to happen, you know, they'll going to be able to download that into your brain.
PERINO: I think it is.
BOLLING: Does it have to be a real quality?
GUTFELD: No, it could be fake.
BOLLING: Read minds.
GUTFELD: Could you imagine? You wouldn't stop.
BOLLING: Maybe not in this table.
GUTFELD: You wouldn't stop. And then you just jump off. You can hear it. You couldn't be able to turn it off. You'll hear everybody.
GUILFOYLE: By the way, that's what you deal with all the time.
GUTFELD: What do you mean?
GUILFOYLE: Well, because, I know, you tell me about your dreams and the weird dreams you have on me and become a robot and then your voices in your head.
GUTFELD: Which happens every night, by the way. Juan? Juan?
WILLIAMS: That was awkward. So I just, you know, it's like when you're looking in the back of a comic book, they have the X-ray vision?
GUTFELD: Oh, jeez. Oh, boy.
GUILFOYLE: Oh, yeah.
WILLIAMS: But, you know, I think --
GUILFOYLE: Charming, Juan.
WILLIAMS: But I think that --
GUTFELD: I wanted that when I was 12.
WILLIAMS: That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying.
GUILFOYLE: It's must be that chair.
WILLIAMS: But I think, you know that whole joke about dance like no one is looking? I'm such a bad dancer. I would like to dance and just do dance without always being self-conscious.
GUILFOYLE: Wait, Juan, what happened?
WILLIAMS: What happened?
WILLIAMS: I don't know. I see a --
GUILFOYLE: I mean, come on.
GUILFOYLE. I got the Latina dance thing. All right, well, you know, I'm still really all about the invisible thing. Remember one time on Facebook Friday and it was like, if you are invisible, what could you do? I said I wanted to be like dropped in the center of Raqqa and take out ISIS
GUILFOYLE: Be invisible.
GUTFELD: You can't use the same answer.
GUILFOYLE: But I still really want to that. So what do you want me to tell you?
GUTFELD: Yes. Or just repetitive.
GUILFOYLE: No, I think it's a good one.
GUTFELD: I'd like to get --
GUILFOYLE: I'm a crowd pleaser.
GUTFELD: I'd like to get things down from a high shelf. That would be something. You don't know how often that happens.
GUILFOYLE: You can climb on Dana's shoulder.
GUTFELD: How often that happens. I'd like to less --
PERINO: You know that I hadn't put the plates in our new apartment in the cupboards below?
GUILFOYLE: Remember Peter put everything up really high?
PERINO: Yeah. Then he hadn't put it down below.
GUTFELD: When you are a short person, people think that your apartment is messy. No, you just can put things away.
GUILFOYLE: You can't reach it.
GUTFELD: So you've got all the stuff all over because, you know, if you're in a hurry, you just grab stuff.
GUTFELD: The floor is my crotch.
All right. Well, that's --
GUTFELD: All right. We're going to start with you, Kimberly. From Rosanna B. Oh, this is a great question, Rosanna. Do still number in the name of your first boyfriend or girlfriend? Kimberly, we'll go around.
GUILFOYLE: Oh, boy. OK. So let me think.
PERINO: Break a heart. There's a broken heart.
GUILFOYLE: I know. I'm trying to think. The first -- I don't know. Let me take a pass on the boyfriend. Let me see. Girlfriend, I would say one of my first like best friends --.
GUTFELD: No, I don't think they meant it that way.
WILLIAMS: Yeah, yeah.
GUTFELD: I don't think they meant it that way.
PERINO: Oh, boyfriend, boyfriend, boyfriend. But do go on.
GUILFOYLE: No, like, in kindergarten, you had seven boyfriends. Like, "Would you be my boyfriend?" I don't remember the exact order.
GUTFELD: All right.
GUILFOYLE: That -- I know one was named like Ted or something.
GUTFELD: Ted. There you go. Ted, Ted is watching at home.
PERINO: Poor Ted.
GUTFELD: Ted just left his wife. He is on a plane. He's coming here.
GUILFOYLE: Ted's a great. Not -- yeah.
WILLIAMS: Oh, there are more than one Ted.
GUTFELD: Juan, do remember the name of your first girlfriend?
WILLIAMS: Do they mean your first lover?
GUTFELD: I don't know. I think it's -- I only read the question.
GUILFOYLE: What are you talking?
GUTFELD: My goodness.
GUILFOYLE: No, I obviously answered about kindergarten not like --
WILLIAMS: Kindergarten. Oh, no.
GUILFOYLE: Actually, Jason came before Ted.
GUTFELD: You're like Fred Willard of Best In Show.
WILLIAMS: Well, I think -- you know, I mean, I don't know. You have a girlfriend -- you have a crush on a girl like in sixth grade or something?
BOLLING: Yeah. Maybe.
GUTFELD: Her name was sure?
BOLLING: Oh, yeah.
GUTFELD: All right. Let's move on, Eric?
BOLLING: Martha Klein (ph) in fifth or sixth grade. I actually --
PERINO: Oh, Martha Klein (ph)?
BOLLING: Wait, you know her?
GUILFOYLE: But she sounds sensible like Dana.
BOLLING: She moved schools, and I begged my parents to move schools and she moved schools.
GUILFOYLE: Now that is --
GUILFOYLE: That is you Bolling.
PERINO: And how long did that last?
BOLLING: It didn't work. It's never worked out.
PERINO: Did you leave school?
BOLLING: No, we just went -- you know, we --
PERINO: I don't remember.
GUTFELD: You don't remember?
BOLLING: Oh, stop, you do.
PERIDO: I don't.
GUTFELD: She won't say.
GUILFOYLE: No, we were too busty getting straight A's and perfect attendance and behaving.
GUTFELD: I can't remember, but I remember how devastating everything is back then. It was like when there was a breakup, it as like the end of the world because your brain cells aren't mature yet enough to handle that crap. So when it happens, you go like, oh my god, the whole world is going to end and it's awful. And it really isn't. It's the best thing. Anyway.
PERINO: All right, whatever.
GUTFELD: You going to want to stick around for what's coming.
GUILFOYLE: Is that it?
WILLIAMS: No more?
GUILFOYLE: What happens?
GUTFELD: They just told me that was enough.
GUILFOYLE: You don't do a good job.
GUTFELD: What are you talking about, because I don't get --
GUILFOYLE: What are the other questions?
GUTFELD: What event in history would you go back in time to change if you could?
GUILFOYLE: 9/11. Yeah, sure. 9/211, yeah, Holocaust.
WILLIAMS: That would be good.
GUTFELD: Yeah. Well, we ended that one in a note.
WILLIAMS: How about the Trump election?
GUTFELD: All right. Coming up, we got a big announcement so stick around. It's going to blow your mind.
PERINO: Welcome back.
GUILFOYLE: And I don't know.
PERINO: Now time to reveal our big announcement. It is our last day in this studio, Studio D, our last time sitting at this table. On Monday, we move into a new studio. We are really growing up. By the way, we can't wait for you to see it. It's brand new, lots of bells and whistles, but still "The Five."
We made a ton of memories over the last 5.5 years in this room together and we put together a little package of our most memorable ones. Take a look.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
GUILFOYLE: At 5:00 in New York City, and this is "The Five." We had our own little toxic spill, that is up here on "The Five". It is still going.
PERINO: This is a beauty of live television, you never know what is going to happen, especially on this show.
WILLIAMS: I actually liked them. You don't like them. Look at you.
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: They're all the same.
GUTFELD: Oh, dramatic music! I am singing.
BOB BECKEL, THE FIVE HOST: Whoever is in charge of the heat in this place, could you please turn it up, I don't ever get cold but today I'm cold.
PERINO: We waited for him for a long time. He is the tardiest dog you've ever met.
BOLLING: Oh. Boy.
PERINO: And he is a real shaky. You want to hold him?
GUILFOYLE: All right. Don't pee on him. I meant you on him.
PERINO: Why did you have to show to get them beads?
GUILFOYLE: Yeah. Everyone feeling themselves a little bit Irish today. Corned beef and cabbage with potatoes.
GUTFELD: Not Irish.
GUILFOYLE: We have a hater at the table.
GUTFELD: You know, that's a fact.
WILLIAMS: Thanks, Kimberly, and I'll see you after the show.
BOLLING: Can we just take a month or two to contemplate him the way we might contemplate a painting by Vermeer?
GUILFOYLE: Security isn't letting him in?
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: You got to open the door.
GUILFOYLE: All right, forget it. Let's start without him. Would you look over there? Eric Bolling, you made it in! Yeah, what happened?
BOLLING: I bribed them. And look who it is?
GUTFELD: Liquidating Twinkies. Why haven't I thought of that? This looks delicious. That's amazing. Well that brilliant.
WILLIAMS: Stay right there. Oh, no. Oh, no. You got me.
GUTFELD: I'm a unicorn. I've been trapped in Greg's body for quite some time.
PERINO: All right, anything else you want to say?
PERINO: OK, good. What does a nosy pepper do?
GUILFOYLE: Ring the bell?
GUILFOYLE: What? Jalapeno business?
WILLIAMS: I like that.
GUILFOYLE: Like all up in your business? That's what you have to say? Oh, Lord have mercy on us.
WILLIAMS: You have no idea what's going on.
BOLLING: Can we say?
GUTFELD: Can we start over again?
BOLLING: No, of course.
BECKEL: You know why I am wearing this? For ratings. That's why I'm wearing this. Same reason you wear that silly hat you wear.
GUTFELD: I thought I was Captain Stupid.
GUILFOYLE: Cooperate. It's going to well. Merry Christmas!
GUTFELD: I'll sit down when I want to sit down. You guys put me through this crap. I'm going to take my time.
WILLIAMS: Just something fit for a --
WILLIAMS: You got it.
GUILFOYLE: Oh! All right.
WILLIAMS: There you go. There you go.
GUILFOYLE: I've always wanted.
GUILFOYLE: Not kidding around, this is really stupid.
GUTFELD: Well, that's it for us. Hope you enjoyed the "The Five" and see you next week.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
GUILFOYLE: How cute.
PERINO: So great Amanda (ph) for showing. But that's together for us. Thank you so much. We've got a few more minutes left in Studio D. One More Thing is up next
GUILFOYLE: All right. It's time now for One More Thing. We sure did enjoy that little flashback video, too, very fun.
Eric, what did you got?
BOLLING: Yeah, that was a good time.
BOLLING: So I'm back on Instagram. After a two-year hiatus, I decided to come back on it.
GUILFOYLE: I noticed that.
BOLLING: And I posted videos and some of the other stuff. I put them up there. And so I took a bunch of pictures, behinds the scenes, pictures of last day in the studio, I'll post them on Instagram only. So come on over. Follow me, I think it is Eric Bolling.
GUILFOYLE: Because you've been on Snapchat a lot.
BOLLING: Yeah, I've been on everything else. And for some reason, I got away from Instagram, but I'm -- I headed back.
GUILFOYLE: It's good to have you back.
WILLIAMS: By the way, I was on a business channel today and they asked me for investment advice, should I invest in Snapchat, because they have an initial public offer.
PERINO: Oh, yeah.
GUILFOYLE: They asked you?
WILLIAMS: Why are you asking me? I'm asking Bolling.
BOLLING: They're lowering evaluation, so if they get it a little bit lower, it's fine, not a bad idea.
GUILFOYLE: Yeah, I think it is a good idea.
GUTFELD: You do.
BOLLING: Snaps are good.
GUILFOYLE: I won't say why.
GUILFOYLE: That's ti. I'll call on myself next. Kimberly, your turn.
All right. At 7:45 or maybe a little bit earlier or maybe a little odd or no, I'm going to be Lou Dobbs tonight. So that's going to be fun and I'm also going to be in --
GUTFELD: The show?
GUTFELD: It's clear or fun.
GUILFOYLE: That's also going to be fun. He was great at CPAC today.
GUTFELD: I heard he just killed. I mean that metaphorically. He didn't anybody.
GUILFOYLE: Exactly. All right. So you're jealous, right? All right. So then I'm going to be on "Hannity" tonight. And for a good fit --
GUTFELD: The show.
GUILFOYLE: -- I'm on the show "Hannity" tonight.
BOLLING: That was busy day.
GUILFOYLE: Getting worse by the minute. Which is going to be great. We've got a lot of special guest tonight, Boris Epshteyn, special guest to president, we've got Herman Cain, much laughs. So then give us all the insights scoops, he was with the president today, Charlie Kirk, from Turning Point USA, Todd, Starnes, one of our famous here at Fox News, and the one and only Geraldo Rivera, so my Puerto Rican brother from another mother. So that should be really good.
PERINO: You're going to argument with him about marijuana?
GUILFOYLE: Exactly. I'm bringing Bolling for backup, because, you know, Bolling he'd like to mix that up with Geraldo.
BOLLING: Yeah. But I think --
PERINO: Yeah, but they are on the same side.
BOLLING: -- we are on the same side on this one.
PERINO: Yeah. That's the thing.
GUILFOYLE: You know, he's very close to Cheech and Chong.
WILLIAMS: You are kidding (ph)?
GUILFOYLE: Geraldo is. No, I'm not kidding you. No, he really is. You know they're like best friends.
BOLLING: But one's dead.
GUILFOYLE: Well, the one is alive.
GUTFELD: They're both alive. Oh, that's good they're both alive.
GUILFOYLE: Oh, OK.
BOLLING: You just don't see the other that often.
GUILFOYLE: Yeah, because he's smoking too much pot when he leaves the house.
GUILFOYLE: All right. Greg, unicorn boy.
GUTFIELD: All right. Tomorrow night, The G.G. Show, 10:00, Saturday, we got Rob O'Neill known for doing something. Can you guess what it is? It runs with, "Yeah, like they got it (ph)," and Jack Gillian Turner and we've got Tyrus and we've got Kat Timpf. It should be a fun, fun show, 10:00, check it out.
GUILFOYLE: Oh, that's going to make it?
GUTFIELD: Yes, they'd better make it.
GUILFOYLE: Okay, fantastic.
GUTFELD: It's time for "I hate these people!"
You know what I hate, when people keep telling you, "Oh, we've got a big surprise for you. We've got a big surprise for you."
GUILFOYLE: We did that.
GUTFELD: And then you find out, we're moving to studio. I mean, are you thinking you were in home going, "Are they kidding? It's a big news. The Five going to two hours? Are they adding a six show?"
GUILFOYLE: Oh, my god.
GUFELD: Are they adding a sixth member and it's a panda? No, we're just moving studios.
BOLLING: You know what's cool about the new studio though?
BOLLING: Look at the table. Can we take a wide shot in the table? Just take note of the table and chairs, not the same.
GUILFOYLE: But it's the same.
GUTFELD: It's the same.
GUILFOYLE: Can I tell you why I actually really like that table? Because I can put my legs under it, otherwise I get all these bruises right here in my left knee from this one.
WILLIAMS: I'm sure the boys are very sensitive to that.
GUILFOYLE: I can tell. Just like aching all over.
GUTFELD: I have bruises on my knee.
WILLIAMS: Is that right? Well, I'm not so sensitive, darling.
GUILFOYLE: Why? Stops. All right.
WILLIAMS: It's going to be a business.
GUILFOYLE: They're not happy with us --
PERINO: And my turn. OK. I got a little note today that I love from a little girl. Her name -- well, the mother. I think I'm saying this right, Sonnia, S-O-N-N-I-A --
PERINO: -- Sonnia Grosen (ph). Well, it should be Sonnia but it's just like S-O-N-N-I-A, Sonnia.
PERINO: I think it's Sonnia. OK, we'll just go with that.
PERINO: She sent a note that her daughter for her 3rd Grade assignment had to choose a famous American to talk about. Well, she chose Jasper and me. Well, really me and jasper. So she did this whole report, and she said, the famous former press secretary that I'm on the "The Five" and I wrote a book. That was it. And then this is the great thing. She was able to get the vizsla of her dreams. He has a new dog. This is Resti Ramon (ph) and she said that he's the best dog ever. Guess what, KG?
GUILFOYLE: What baby (ph)?
PERINO: She got 100 percent.
GUILFOYLE: Oh, my god.
PERINO: -- children out there when you have a report --
GUTFELD: I think it's fair that you get to bring a dog. All the other kids, they're going like, "Well, I don't have a dog to bring."
WILLIAMS: Yeah. They think durables (ph).
GUILFOYLE: You can bring here like --
WILLIAMS: It's a little Dana Perino. She got an A. OK. So Ellen DeGeneres invited the entire senior class of Brooklyn Summit Academy Charter School to come see her show yesterday. The students were thrilled to just be there, but they ended up with the thrill of a lifetime.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
ELLEN DEGENERES, HOST, "THE ELLEN DEGENERES SHOW": We reached out to the people of Walmart and they want to give each one of you a four-year scholarship.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
WILLIAMS: All those kids are going get to go to college and they come from a community in Brooklyn where only 4 percent of the adult have a college degree. Ellen DeGeneres, Walmart --
GUILFOYLE: That's amazing.
GUTFELD: That's generous.
GUILFOYLE: Yeah, that was amazing.
GUTFELD: A DeGeneres.
GUILFOYLE: So you never miss an episode of "The Five". That's it for us. New studio next week. Have a great weekend. Bye, studio D!
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