Did you know we're in Vegas? So here's a thought: Why not do a monologue on the safest bet to make this election?
I know! Talk about unpredictable!
Now, when it comes to gambling if the game is easy to play, it will usually cost you more. Slots and video poker are easy but fast, so you'll run out of cash pulling that lever and pushing those buttons.
If you do some homework and learn a table game, you'll still lose, but you'll lose slower.
The point: Easy is deceptive, effort reaps reward.
Meaning: This election, resist the platitudes, promises and gimmickry that sounds too good to be true. If it's too fast and easy, then you're being duped.
Now, of Trump and Hillary which one is the safer bet?
Although the election feels like a one-time bet -- which is better because the house edge works on your stake just once -- the payout lasts four years. That's scary, but not the end of the world. There's still 2020.
So, do you put it all on black -- i.e. Hillary? Or all on orange -- Donald?
My advice to the undecided: Go slow; do the homework, block out the emotion and media hysteria and think about the one issue that matters most to you. Is it terror? Immigration? Competence? Experience? Character?
Think about that. Then bury everything in a can in your backyard. That's the safest bet in the world.
Greg Gutfeld currently serves as host of FOX News Channel's (FNC) The Greg Gutfeld Show (Saturdays 10-11PM/ET) and co-host of The Five (weekdays 5-6PM/ET). He joined the network in 2007 as a contributor. Click here for more information on Greg Gutfeld.