Powerball's now at $1.5 billion. The drawing is tonight. Yippee.
It's grown so fat because they lowered the odds to boost the size. It's like an all-you-can-eat joint that keeps extending its hours, and we're Michael Moore.
And people ignore odds when wishful thinking takes over.
Compare the odds to terror. You're 10 times more likely to die from that, but the government says, don't worry - even as terror methods change.
ISIS now seeks bioweapons to make their own kind of Powerball. But if you worry, you're stupid, says the government. So, go play the lotto instead, you dumb people.
Did I say people?
I mean poor people. People who play the lotto tend to belong to low income households. You could call that a tax on the poor, but it's not, since a tax is money taken, not spent.
But it is gambling. And it is hypocrisy. Our government pushes a numbers racket, but goes after fantasy football. Could their selective righteousness be profit driven? The lotto makes billions, which apparently goes to education. But if you've seen improvements on that end, please let us know.
Your kid has better odds winning the Mega Millions than a science fair.
Either way - a real lotto would offer not just a prize, but, for me, a consequence. Would you play it if there were a risk of death? What if you could buy a winning ticket, or a toxic one – a deadly one?
At least that's a cost we might understand - a cost that keeps us from feeding that beast at the buffet.
Greg Gutfeld currently serves as host of FOX News Channel's (FNC) The Greg Gutfeld Show (Sundays 10-11PM/ET) and co-host of The Five (weekdays 5-6PM/ET). He joined the network in 2007 as a contributor. Click here for more information on Greg Gutfeld.