This is a RUSH transcript from "The O'Reilly Factor," September 10, 2014. This copy may not be in its final form and may be updated.
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O'REILLY: Thanks for staying with us, I'm Bill O'Reilly in "The Miller Time" segment tonight. Let's get right to the sage of southern California who joins us from Santa Barbara. All right, Miller, the president's speech coming up momentarily. What say you?
DENNIS MILLER, RADIO TALK SHOW HOST: Well, the first thing I would do is make sure that Joe-Joe Biden was put down for the night. Somebody has got to pump a sedative dart into his haunch so he doesn't run on live in the middle of the speech and start doing the crazy anything, second ...
MILLER: As far as the president goes, I would tell him like I would tell a young comedian preparing television appearance live. That he shouldn't tip all the punch lines. I think he's going to give details. I think what we have with ISIS and, you know, the other terror groups is a premise problem. I don't think it's about the details. I think it's a premise problem. If I was him, the best thing he could say is as of tonight, we're at war with jihad. Say those two words and the rest of it is all gravy. But you know, as I was watching Megyn Kelly interview, the tenured Tonto the other night, I remember thinking, you know, the world does look at us as Church Chilean now, unfortunately it's not Winston it's Ward Churchill.
O'REILLY: More Churchill, right.
MILLER: We need to dream more Ville Chamberlain. And less Neville Chamberlain, because at this point, I think Jihad looks at us and ironically, I think they think Barack Obama is the jayvee. So, if I was him I would say the word war against jihad. That's it.
O'REILLY: I would too, I agree 100 percent. You know, we have been underestimated by Nikita Khrushchev and the communists. You know, they were going to bury us. The jihadists underestimating us now. I mean taunting us by beheading our citizens on the video. And I think Obama has got to just bring it. But whether he can bring it or not, that is the question. Whether he has ...
O'REILLY: You know. All right. Now Miller and I fly around the country and we know that the seats are getting smaller as Americans are getting larger.
O'REILLY: And when you put the seat back down, you can dislocate your jaw. I mean it's crazy, and there are fights, literally fights breaking out. Miller on the planes when the little seat back goes down. What say you?
MILLER: Last time you and I were on coach Gary Powers was flying, all right?
O'REILLY: Some airlines don't have firsts and they don't have business. Like Southwest. I fly them once in a while. You have got to sit there.
MILLER: Oh, sure. Yeah, I know.
You know, Billy, I was surprised that you installed one of those knee protectors on our private jet when we left Rapid City, South Dakota last year. I went to lean back and usually you read me a bedtime story to put me to sleep on "The Bolder Fresher" tour. And I was leaning back thinking OK, Billy is going to pick up the story of Johnny Stossel's magic stash turning into a caterpillar and I found the knee protector there and I thought wow this is really getting invasive. Folks, don't fly coach. If you have to go from New York to L.A. You are better off walking than flying coach, OK?
O'REILLY: Riding a bike.
MILLER: Because you are going to sit down and coach. They are going to chain you to the oar and tell you to pay attention to the guy working the drum up at the front of the cab.
O'REILLY: I mean how did it happen? How did it get this bad? My father once forced me to take a Greyhound bus from Long Island to Fort Lauderdale, Florida. I mean I thought that was the worse. You couldn't get any worse than that even getting off at south of the border. And eating those greasy omelets. But now it's worse as you say flying and taking the Greyhound down to Lauderdale.
O'REILLY: Listen, stretch. You couldn't even fit in coach anymore. Let's face facts. You know, you have got those extendo legs.
MILLER: The fact is be lucky you're flushing hosting "THE FACTOR" because you don't have to go back into hosting that freak show.
O'REILLY: It's true. It's true.
All right. Jay Carney, Miller and I have been on a camping trip with him. He left the White House and now is going to sign with CNN. And what do you think about that?
MILLER: Well, I think Jay Carney in the job we see on the screen has spent the last six years becoming very comfortable in front of a small group of 70, 80 people who completely agree with him. That's perfect for CNN. Nothing about the audience he is going to have over there, baby.
O'REILLY: You don't see him as a threat to the power of the Fox News channel?
MILLER: No. Listen, Wolf Blitzer stays ever vigilant over there. He might not be paying attention to the world. But trust me he has got Carney on the 24 hour lipstick spy cam in his dressing room. He knows what's up over there.
O'REILLY: You know, the other guy and his name escapes me. The guy who was before Carney, he works for CNN, too. Or at least he used to. He took some shots at Obama. What's his name? Does anybody remember? Can you tell me in the ear?
MILLER: Ron Ziegler (ph)?
O'REILLY: No, that was Nixon. All right. What, tell me? Tell me.
O'REILLY: Robert Gibbs. Robert Gibbs. You know, it's like a pipeline of CNN from the White House. But Gibbs on - he was tough on Obama. Do you think Carney is going to do that?
MILLER: No, the White House press corps - The White House press secretary is CNN's intern program, all right?
MILLER: They work a lot better and bring them up to the mother ship.
O'REILLY: Very good line. You will become a White House spokesperson, next stop CNN. Dennis Miller, Everybody.
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