This is a rush transcript from "The Five," March 3, 2014. This copy may not be in its final form and may be updated.
DANA PERINO, CO-HOST: Hello, everyone. I'm Dana Perino, along with Kimberly Guilfoyle, Bob Beckel, Eric Bolling and Greg Gutfeld.
It's 5 o'clock in New York City. And this is "The Five."
PERINO: As Russia tightens its grip on the Crimea region of the Ukraine, the United States and Europe are weighing their options to isolate the country. Secretary of State John Kerry is heading to Kiev tonight.
Russia has reportedly given a deadline of 10:00 p.m. Eastern for two warships to surrender or be seized. But Moscow is denying that ultimatum.
President Putin made his first public appearance in nearly a week today to watch military maneuvers in western Russia, and then, earlier today, President Obama offered this warning.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
PRESIDENT BARACK OBAMA: I think the strong condemnation that it's received from countries around the world indicates the degree to which Russia is on the wrong side of history on this. If, in fact, they continue on the current trajectory that they're on, that we are examining a whole series of steps, economic, diplomatic, that will isolate Russia. This will be a costly proposition.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
PERINO: Tomorrow, NATO's council will hold an emergency meeting at the request of Poland that invoked the clause that indicates the country feels its security is threatened.
So, Bob, I want to go to you first because in any White House, you can just be going along, you got your agenda, you got your State of the Union and your budget, and all of a sudden, something happens overseas and lands on the president's desk. What do you think about all the developments over the weekend?
BOB BECKEL, CO-HOST: Well, it lands on his desk at a time when his biggest negative is he's not a very strong president. So, here you have this major foreign policy issue, which is a significant issue. Let's not understate this.
The Kiev -- the whole Ukrainian issue for Eastern Europe and for NATO is very, very important. For the polls, I understand that. I watched today when the U.N. ambassador from Russia, Security Council empowered our ambassador, who is very good, the Russian guy said we're in there for human rights. I mean, it was so obviously typical old school Russian, and she said -- she was very good at outlining what they had done wrong.
I think that they're not going to give up the Crimea. I think they're going to try to annex it. And then, the question is, what do we do about it? What are the options to the president? I think everybody agrees there's no military options, so it's economic sanctions.
First thing that ought to be done is thrown out of the G-8. That would hurt the Russians. They would probably cut off their oil and gas to Europe, but I think that's a price they may have to pay.
PERINO: Do you think, Eric, that any of the options that the president outlined today, both financial sanctions, also possible travel -- the bans for some of the Russian government, do you think that would have -
- how much pressure would we have to bring to bear to actually make a difference?
ERIC BOLLING, CO-HOST: Well, I'm sure President Obama right now is wording a strongly worded tweet that he's going to deliver to Vladimir Putin and that might scare him.
I agree with Bob on a lot of this. However, I think we need to wait.
KIMBERLY GUILFOYLE, CO-HOST: Oh, it was the tweet thing with (INAUDIBLE).
But what we really need to do is wait for the European Union. The European Union has to do this first. It's not us. Look, they have -- they're most at risk. There's half a trillion in trade going back and forth between the E.U. and Russia. We have about $38 billion in trade.
It's big, but it's certainly nowhere near the E.U. is.
The E.U. needs Russian gas and oil. About a third of all their energy products come from Russia. A lot of it goes through the Ukraine. So, they need that -- they are kind of afraid to fire a shot at Russia, economic shot.
And Russia, they need to realize -- Russia needs those petrol dollars.
They can't just cut off the European Union and stop shipping them gas and oil. Russia would buckle under. Their ruble will fall apart. They would buckle under.
So, they need each other. This has got to come from the E.U., and we should join the E.U. with economic sanctions, at least the threat of them, and I think that would be enough for Putin to get the heck out of Crimea.
PERINO: The E.U.'s position on this has not always been that strong.
There are lots of other opinions. I'm going to go to this sound on tape and then get Kimberly and Greg's thoughts. Let's go to that tape.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIPS)
SECRETARY OF STATE JOHN KERRY: It's an incredible act of aggression.
It is really a stunning willful choice by President Putin to invade another country. Russia is in violation of the sovereignty of Ukraine.
SECRETARY OF DEFENSE CHUCK HAGEL: This is a time for careful, wise, steady leadership.
SEN. MARCO RUBIO, R-FLA.: We know that the Russians have basically violated every major treaty they ever entered into. We see how they basically lied. I mean, let's call it what it is. They are lying, and this government is a government of liars.
REP. MIKE ROGERS, R-MICH.: I think Putin is playing chess and I think we're playing marbles.
SEN. LINDSEY GRAHAM, R-S.C.: Every time the president goes on national television and threatens Putin or anyone like Putin, everybody's eyes roll, including mine. We have a weak and indecisive president that invites aggression.
(END VIDEO CLIPS)
PERINO: All right. Bob, I know you have signed but you started off your comment saying it is perceived that President Obama is weak.
BECKEL: I just don't like to watch these politicians take advantages of this.
PERINO: Well, they have a right to make their point.
Let's give Greg the right to make his point about your thoughts over the weekend.
GREG GUTFELD, CO-HOST: I just think it's funny two weeks ago John Kerry was saying climate change was the biggest enemy in the world, and what happened? He forgot about hurricane Vlad.
Saying to a tyrant that you're on the wrong side of history means nothing. That's like telling a bank robber he doesn't have an account at the bank. They know.
I have a weird prediction, and I don't know if it's good or if it's bad, but I think that there's going to be an emergence of a modern American nationalism out of necessity, just because there's no --
PERINO: What do you mean by that?
GUTFELD: There's going to be something, probably a little bit scarier
-- 1979, what we saw was the emergence of a new leader, a strong leader, a pro-American leader in Ronald Reagan because you sensed the country needed it. There's nowhere else to go for America. You can't get any less ambivalent than we are right now about the world. It's a combination of isolationism on the left and right. That we decided that we want to turn out the lights and pretend we're not home.
And I think right now, we're in a state where we actually might have to see a resurgence of a very nationalistic leader out of necessity because no one seems to listen to us. And I don't know if that's good or bad. I think it might be good.
PERINO: What are your thoughts on that, Kimberly?
GUILFOYLE: I don't know. I think this is a very bad situation. I think this is a tipping point in many respects because this is just more of Putin asserting himself. I mean, he is the bad guy. He is the bully here.
He's the one that's in violation, but unfortunately, I'm not very optimistic about a kind of any of, you know, sanctions that we might put forward or, you know, removal from the G-8, because I think Russia and Putin in particular will find a way to go around it. He's been very successful at doing that.
Look, I want to be optimistic -- glass half full and all that, but a little sprinkle of reality in there.
BECKEL: I think Eric is exactly right about the E.U. They're the ones with most at stake. And I think they have to make the decision.
Here's another thing that's going to happen. There will be a move at the Security Council to put enforcements on -- put sanctions on Russia.
The question is, where is China going to be on that?
GUILFOYLE: I'll tell you.
PERINO: Well, there was news today on that. There was a lot of confusion today on that because world leaders have phone calls and then their PR people rush to the microphones to try to shape those phone calls.
So, Putin and the Chinese president had a meeting today by phone.
Afterwards, Russia said, oh, the Chinese agreed with us, that we're in the right. Then the Chinese had to come out and say, no, no, not necessarily.
However, I think that is the concern, Eric, right? That China would say, well, we have permission now to do what we want to do with those islands.
BECKEL: Whatever, Russia has got a veto there, so they can't -- nothing can get through, but I'm curious about the Chinese.
BOLLING: Don't forget, the Chinese are adjacent to Russia and they get a lot of oil from Russia. Oil and gas goes to not only European countries. It also goes to China. They're very -- they have the same situation that the European Union has.
GUILFOYLE: And Ukrainian agricultural products as well.
BOLLING: -- dependent on oil and gas --
BOLLING: Here's how dependent they are. They produce around 10 million barrels of oil, forget gas, just oil, per day. They only use about
4 million. So, 5 million barrels per day, $105, $106 a barrel. That's a ton of money.
Their economy is based on the petrol dollars. They're entirely in need of oil prices to be high.
By the way, this conflict is shooting oil prices up -- up $4 a barrel in Europe, $2 here.
BECKEL: That's what they've got to rely on this, the petrol dollars.
BOLLING: Can I just throw something very quickly? Lindsey Graham mentioned this, I think he's completely off base on this. A couple other senators mentioned it, that we should look at our banking system and maybe freeze some assets of Russia. Individual Russians, not only --
PERINO: That's what they did to the Iranians.
BOLLING: But this is very dangerous. You're going to start making our banking system, you know, the ruler, the stick you're going to start hitting people that you don't agree with over the hand with, you're going to -- you're going to take the legs out of our own financial banking system.
PERINO: That's what we did with Osama bin Laden's lieutenants. I mean, that's one of the ways the Treasury Department was able to track people down, and to choke up their money.
BECKEL: Because they were holding American prisoners.
PERINO: I want to get to something else, bob, you said about the Russians and how they're trying to shape this. They have their own PR needs.
Greg, let's get your take on it. When Russia says they're doing this out of respect of rule of law and out of human rights and the ability for people to live the way that they want to live, if you're in Russia and you hear that, you're probably more sympathetic to Russia than you are to the Ukrainians.
GUTFELD: Well, that's all Russians hear is propaganda. They don't have a free press. So, they have no idea what's going on.
The big concern to me is that Putin has one thought in his mind. And one thought only. And that is power.
We have a president right now that's preoccupied with a plethora of issues in which none of them are prioritized. They're all of equal fitting and equal setting. I mean, it could be a gay athlete, it could be climate fluctuations, it could be an angry professor. All these things are swirling around in Obama's head.
Meanwhile, you've got a guy who only thinks about one thing and one thing only. And that's power.
PERINO: What do you think, Kimberly, about --
GUILFOYLE: You've got one guy OCD on power and the other guy ADD on liberal ideology. Where do I go? My head --
PERINO: There was an interesting piece that was written today in "U.S. News." And it's quoting a lot of intel world people about how America and Putin, the way that we see him is not necessarily how he sees himself. So, when Secretary Kerry says Putin is acting from a position of weakness, a lot of people say, obviously, he's acting from a position of strength. Do you think there's maybe some truth to the fact Putin feels threatened which is why he's trying to amass more power?
GUILFOYLE: I think Putin feels awesome. I think he's a classic narcissist, but I think he thinks he's acting in the best interests, the total dictator mentality, the people don't know what's good for them, I do know. I'll make sure it happens.
I don't think he sees it any other way, or honestly that he feels insecure in his position. I think he feels like this is his destiny, that he's entitled, that this is his course of action and that he's not uncertain about it and he'll do whatever it takes to get and achieve what he wants.
PERINO: What do you think, Bob?
GUILFOYLE: No matter who he crushes.
BECKEL: The question is, what can he achieve? This is the current situation. The interim government which called an election for May 25th, including the former government, the people in there equivalent of legislature, they have agreed they would leave the Russians alone and let them have their port in the Crimea. They have agreed that they would abide by the accords in place when Ukraine established the relationship with Europe.
From Putin's standpoint, Ukraine going to the European Union is a deadly thing because it's the end of his goal of trying to put the old USSR together.
The last thing I'll say, how in the world, if they're agreeing to let the Russians have the Crimean ports and they elect a president, what's Russia's argument going to be then?
BOLLING: This is the point I was hoping to be able to make also. OK, so, the Crimean region is a semiautonomous region. They have their own parliament set up. Also, the Crimean region is very friendly to the Russians. More so than they are the Ukrainian people.
This is going to be unpopular. Would it be the worst thing in the world if the Crimean region went to Russia? Ukraine stayed whole, and all of the trade that went through Ukrainians from Russia into Eastern Europe and the rest of Europe stays the same?
PERINO: But then you have all those Baltic States who are feeling pressure as well, and they don't feel secure in their democracy.
GUILFOYLE: They feel like they're next.
PERINO: So many people have given their lives to have a strong democracy there. I think that -- I see your point, and I thing that's the one that Russia will make to Moldova and other places in the region, and then Putin is actually then able to amass more power.
BECKEL: Except that I think Eric is right on a point here. It does sound like we're weak and the rest (INAUDIBLE) Crimea. What if we did it in exchange for the Ukraine being part of NATO?
PERINO: So, then, are you willing to do it everywhere else? I mean -
BECKEL: Bring Ukraine officially into the E.U.
PERINO: That goes back to something that you said --
BECKEL: It's not a bad chess game.
BOLLING: That's a great trade. Is there anyone who would be --
PERINO: I'm not willing to trade people.
GUILFOYLE: Dana is like, no.
PERINO: I think the E.U. has got to step up to the plate. They were the ones who denied expansion to NATO, to both Georgia and Ukraine when they had the opportunity in April of 2008.
GUILFOYLE: This is sort of their moment, don't you think, Dana, to exercise some diplomacy, to show some -- otherwise, I think it's kind of an ineffectual group. What do they do?
GUTFELD: The Ukrainian dream was inspired by our own pursuit for freedom. And now in a weird way, we're saying you're on your own because we got ours.
We used to embrace countries that we inspired. I'm not so sure we're that way anymore because we don't inspire our own president.
PERINO: The other thing is how weak the Ukrainian government is, that they have been running deficits, they have almost no money in their treasury. So what do you need to be strong? You need a good economy, right?
GUILFOYLE: We solved it all.
PERINO: OK. Next, Mitt Romney and Sarah Palin warned years ago about what is happening in Russia today. But they were mocked by President Obama and others on the whole left. We've got the tape.
And later, stars, selfies, and slices at the Academy Awards last night. Stay tuned for our thoughts on the big show coming up on this big show, "The Five."
GUILFOYLE: Look at Bob --
GUTFELD: So, Tina Fey was right. Sarah Palin could see Russia from her house, or rather Putin's threats. She warned us way back in 2008 if Barack Obama wins, his indecision and moral equivalence may spur Putin to invade Ukraine. She was mocked for it because as you know, she talks funny and stuff.
And who could forget the debate that Obama had a lame joke that poked fun at Mitt for calling him a foe?
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
FORMER REPUBLICAN PRESIDENTIAL NOMINEE MITT ROMNEY: Russia is a geopolitical foe. Excuse me, it's a geopolitical foe, and I said in the same paragraph, I said, and Iran is the greatest national security threat we face. Russia does continue to battle us in the U.N. time and time again. I have clear eyes on this. I'm not going to wear rose colored glasses when it comes to Russia or Mr. Putin.
OBAMA: The 1980s are now calling to ask for their foreign policy back because the Cold War has been over for 20 years.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
GUTFELD: Now, I tell the president to keep his day job, but that's the problem, he kept it. There's nothing gained from screaming I told you so to a giggling moronic media. In fact, it's a selfish act predicated on things going badly for America. We should want to be proven wrong because that means the country is OK.
But there's a lesson in Palin and Mitt's validation. If they were right then, what else are they right about?
Let's dredge up that phrase, drill, baby drill. Drill keystone, undercut the price Russia charges for Europe and we'll win the new Cold War the way we won the last one, by bankrupting Russia without firing a shot.
We'll also kiss off the crazies in the Middle East while we're at it.
But Obama doesn't feel compelled to take on Putin. Maybe he might stand up to the far left environmentalists in his own party, which makes me wonder. How do you stand up to yourself?
Hey, I want to play this. This is my favorite SOT. This is John Berry bashing Sarah Palin and Mitt Romney over their short sightedness with Russia.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
KERRY: He's even blurted out the preposterous notion that Russia is our number one political, geopolitical foe. Folks, Sarah Palin said she could see Russia from Alaska. Mitt, Mitt Romney talks like he's only seen Russia by watching "Rocky IV."
(END VIDEO CLIP)
GUILFOYLE: Oh, my gosh.
GUTFELD: Bob, that -- that's disgusting. Sarah Palin is a better secretary of state than John Kerry.
BECKEL: Let's try to put this into perspective. Back during that period, Ukraine was always a centerpiece of the right's argument about how Russia was always going to be, that was going to be the first place they were going to go, Georgia and Ukraine.
I'm not surprised he said it. A lot of people were saying, she was not alone.
Having said that, I still wonder today if this were today and Ronald Reagan were in office today, what would he do? Stand on the border of Ukraine and say, go back home, Russia? What would he do?
GUTFELD: I don't know. To be fair --
GUILFOYLE: We're interested in what our president is going to do and how to handle --
BECKEL: We talked about this. Does the E.U. --
GUTFELD: Reagan was in power, let's face it.
PERINO: Also, it's the mocking. It's the mocking from the left in the media from someone from the right that had said anything about foreign policy.
Interestingly, you never know what the issue is going to be. In the year 2000, neither Bush nor Gore was asked about al Qaeda by anybody in the media, about anybody, any of the debate. You never know what's going to happen.
The Ukraine and Georgia, that was, the signs were there. The Bush administration will admit on Georgia, it missed a lot of the signs.
PERINO: So, why can't they just admit it and be gracious. They're so mean to her.
GUILFOYLE: Very mean.
BOLLING: A lot of people were saying that. Can you name some?
BECKEL: Oh, sure.
BOLLING: Not putting you on the spot. I will tell you who was made fun of. Sarah Palin and Mitt Romney were made fun of them, and there's no apologies being issued right now by the lefties idiots on MSNBC going, who just trashed her after --
BECKEL: I think the answer --
BOLLING: They should be walking all that back, saying, you know what, she may have said it, but we trashed her --
BECKEL: I don't know about Mitt Romney, but I have very serious questions about whether Sarah Palin really understood the geopolitical ramifications of what she was saying.
GUILFOYLE: Now, you're undermining it and can't be gracious and say that she got right.
BOLLING: Did you hear her speech? Go back to her speech and listen to it. She outlined that Russians will move and the likely target is Ukraine.
BECKEL: And the likely target, the Russians were going to move back the last 15 years has been to Ukraine.
GUTFELD: Can I bring Kimberly into this? My other issue is the danger of embracing a messenger at the expense of the message. People like Obama because he was cooler and the squares which were basically Palin and Mitt, were mocked even if they were right.
GUILFOYLE: Yes, because it came down to a popularity contest. OK, let's tally up the votes who wins for prom queen and king. That's not what life is about.
As you see, we became very ill-equipped and unprepared for a situation like this. And they can laugh and say all the stupid things they want about Mitt and about Sarah Palin, but you know what? At least they haven't been humiliated internationally and domestically how many times by Russia?
Whether it was about the Syria complex, whether it was about Snowden, the Ukraine, all of this, look at the mess we have to deal with right now.
PERINO: There's also a strange thing that happened yesterday on the Sunday shows, with Secretary of State John Kerry talking to David Gregory on "Meet the Press." And David Gregory asked him about the Russian reset and how that factors into all this. And Kerry says I don't know what you're talking about. He said, no, wait, the whole thing you based President Obama's foreign policy on.
And they just get a pass. Nobody is making fun of Secretary Kerry today.
GUILFOYLE: No one follows up with a question.
BECKEL: That answer of his was absolutely ridiculous.
Let me say this in defense of what Mitt Romney did and Sarah Palin.
We have been so consumed with Islamic terrorists --
BECKEL: -- that we have not looked at potential -- the big geopolitical picture which is Russia and China.
BECKEL: I've been saying this to China for a long time.
So if the Obama administration missed it, a lot of people missed it.
That while we're focusing on these terrorists that I think we're over- focused on, in the meantime, we have left alone some of the big players in the world.
GUTFELD: To be fair, I think you're right. I still believe terror is number one. I always feel terrorist number one. But I always thought Russia was a second-tier issue.
GUILFOYLE: Of course.
GUTFELD: I always felt that way because I wanted to believe it. I wanted to believe that the Russians were so much in love with the West, but I conflated Russia with Putin.
PERINO: But the Russians have been helpful to the United States when it came to fighting radical Islamic terrorism because they have the same problem with --
GUILFOYLE: Because it's in their own self interest.
PERINO: Putin is the president of a sovereign nation. He should not be allowed to invade other sovereign nations. But when you're fighting an ideological war, you have to work with people like Putin.
BOLLING: Can I point out the difference between China and Russia and the war on terror?
BOLLING: The national interest. Where is the threat to the national interest of Russia going into Crimea of Ukraine? There's very little to --
BECKEL: The national security is the United States commitment to our European allies by treaty.
GUILFOYLE: You have to see who has skin in the game.
BECKEL: We do have skin in the game.
BOLLING: Talk about whether there's a national interest of Americans abroad who are being blown to smithereens in certain areas or being blown up here in America.
GUTFELD: All right. We've got to go.
"The Five"'s Oscar breakdown is next.
BOLLING: Welcome back, everybody.
Time for the fastest seven, three stories with gravity, seven American minutes that hustle one former wolf for a host.
First up, Academy Award acceptance speeches can go in many different directions. Here's a montage of some memorable moments. Jared was long winded. Lupita was emotional, and Matthew was spot on.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIPS)
JARED LETO, ACTOR: In 1971, Bossier City, Louisiana, there was a teenage girl who was pregnant with her second child. She was a high school dropout, and a single mom. But somehow, she managed to make a better life for herself and her children. That girl is my mother, and she's here tonight.
LUPITA NYONG'O, ACTRESS: When I look down at this golden statue, may it remind me and every little child that no matter where you're from, your dreams are valid.
MATTHEW MCCONAUGHEY, ACTOR: First off, I want to thank God because that's who I look up to. He has graced my life with opportunities that I know are not of my hand or any other human hand.
(END VIDEO CLIPS)
BOLLING: Dana, let me go to you. Surprising Matthew McConaughey, right on the box, not the last thought, right out of the box he thanked God.
PERINO: Well, what I wrote down here is, when did it become news and surprising for people to thank God?
PERINO: And it really does seem like it's so brave and courageous. I guess it is in front of a crowd like that. That's the movie I want to see.
That's on my list of the ones.
BOLLING: Great movie, a great flick.
GUILFOYLE: But I gave it to you.
PERINO: I know. I haven't had time. I'm going to watch it.
GUILFOYLE: No, for our popcorn party.
GUTFELD: You're assuming when he said God, he meant God. He was talking about Harvey Weinstein.
The best line of the Oscars was Ellen saying there were two possibilities at the end of the night, possibility one, "12 Years a Slave"
wins. Possibility two, you're all racist.
That was like a brave and very funny, and it summed up the whole Oscars.
GUILFOYLE: Didn't you say that some time? Because I know people tell (INAUDIBLE).
GUTFELD: It was a good show.
BOLLING: K.G., talk to me about, did you like Lupita? She was so happy?
GUILFOYLE: Yes, so sweet, so genuine. She hasn't been compromised or tainted by any of the Hollywood, you know, vices. She was like purity, right? Someone who was so happy to be there. I loved her, I loved McConaughey. He looked thin. He needs some Perino pot roast.
But, yes, other than that, I thought it was good. Ellen did a good job.
BOLLING: She did a nice job.
How about Jared Leto, huh?
BECKEL: The lead guy, you mean?
BOLLING: Yes, the first guy.
BECKEL: I never heard of the guy before. I saw the movie, and I said, that really can't be the same person who played that woman. It was not only a remarkable acting job. I thought what he said there about raising the issue about his mother, but more importantly, what everybody associated with that movie did was to educate people once again about the scourge of AIDS that was very prevalent in the '80s and '90s and a lot of people have lost track of it. I'm glad to see it come back. And I also think Ellen DeGeneres was -- this is the first Oscars I watched, honestly.
And I think she was funny, good, moved it along. And I think you're exactly right. That took a lot of nerve.
And the last point, to say God is the first in front of the crowd, courage.
BOLLING: That took guts, right?
Right. Up next, check out the star selfie. Ellen got the first few rows of stars to pose for an impromptu selfie. It lit up the Internet, crashed Twitter and broke the record for most retweets in history, almost 3 million so far.
I could -- that was -- think it was impromptu?
GUTFELD: I think it was planned. But you know what drives me nuts, the worst gag was Jimmy Kimmel did the skit where he enters someone's house to admonish them for doing mean tweets. So, they portrayed the viewer as fat, stupid slobs and they tweet this and get all this retweeting. It's like social media is driving your ratings right now, and you just insulted your whole audience. You called them losers.
I would have turned off the TV but I had to talk about it today. They called all of us fat pigs.
GUTFELD: This thing.
BOLLING: The mean ones we get, you know them.
GUTFELD: Yes, the media does the mean twee tweeting. And Kimmel is a mean comic. He did the man show. The man show was Twitter before there was Twitter.
GUILFOYLE: I think Jimmy Kimmel is so funny.
BECKEL: I have to say one thing. My daughter made me watch the red carpet coming in. This is the most inane, ridiculous, self-absorbed, everything about American culture is caught up on that red -- including the people who do the interviews and the sweet people in the booths who did the interview.
PERINO: Can I make a comment about social media? The Oscars. Maybe it works for them to have a five-hour long show. I didn't watch it, except on Twitter. I watched Maureen Walsh, makeup at FOX. She has great tweets about fashion and makeup during the show.
Your tweets were very funny. I was retweeting.
I was kind of like watching it that way while I watched the programs I wanted to watch on Netflix.
GUILFOYLE: You wouldn't watch it if it started at 6:00 in the morning, Dana, you would watch --
BOLLING: I want to get that in. By the way, the retweet, almost 3 million retweets, the prior record was President Obama's about 775,000.
So, they've really -- by the way, a lot of people yelling at us for doing Oscar people, but a lot of other people like to hear about it and talk about it.
All right. Leave it to "Huff Po" to screw up a really good time.
Check out their editorial director, Howard Fineman's tweet comparing an awards show to a bloody conflict playing out in Russia.
Hey, "Huff Po," it's Hollywood. Illusion, fantasy, story telling.
Not bloody foreign policy.
Bob, you can kick back and watch a little Hollywood, can't you?
BECKEL: I know Howard quite well, and I'm, frankly, not all that surprised. I mean, he gets somewhat enamored by that crowd. There's too much of an incestuousness between New York and Washington, and they think they're the only two people who can discuss anything important when most of them are so vacuous, they can't discuss anything.
GUILFOYLE: Yes, but they think nobody is good or funny or talented or smart, or like evolved. Can I just say something?
BECKEL: And who cares about what they wear? God, I can't --
GUILFOYLE: Can I go back to number two? I wore the stretch pants and the little kind of pajama outfit and ate the leftover five popcorn to watch the Oscar. So I am like the Jimmy Kimmel thing.
GUTFELD: I didn't know Howard Fineman was the editorial director of "The Huffington Post." That's like being the editorial director of feces.
BOLLING: That's --
GUTFELD: I just want to make a point. He's a media expert. How could you be so clueless about your own media? I don't get it.
BOLLING: This is terrible, I didn't read the tweet yet.
Very quickly, "Academy Awards show shows diversity, tolerance, cultural creativity of he U.S. in Obama era. Hard power matter, per Putin, but Oscars are as powerful."
Quick thought, Dana?
PERINO: The Oscars are so powerful. I mean, I'm on my knees --
GUILFOYLE: -- very euphoric.
PERINO: I think he married the right woman. His wife apparently told him, he tweets this afterwards, "Before I tweeted that earlier thing out, my wife said it was the most vapid observation ever. I guess she was right." He married Ms. Right.
GUTFELD: I think that's fake. I think he made that up.
PERINO: You think he made that up, too?
BOLLING: Olympic Blade Runner Oscar Pistorius started today in South Africa. He's accused of murdering his model girlfriend on Valentine's Day last year. One of his neighbors was first up on the witness stand and told what she heard that night. Very dramatic coming up next.
GUILFOYLE: He made history in 2012 by becoming the first double amputee to compete in the Olympics. Today, Oscar Pistorius made a plea at the opening of his murder trial in South Africa.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: The accused did unlawfully and intentionally kill a person, to wit, Reeva Steenkamp.
UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: How do you plead?
OSCAR PISTORIUS, OLYMPIC SPRINTER: Not guilty, my lady.
UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: Thank you.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
GUILFOYLE: Pistorius is accused of killing his girlfriend, Reeva Steenkamp, in his home last year. He says it was an accident. Mistaking her for an intruder, but prosecutors say he shot her intentionally after a fight.
Well, the first witness in the case took the stand today, a neighbor named Michelle Burger. Here's her telling the court what she heard that night.
(BEGIN AUDIO CLIP)
MICHELLE BURGER, WITNESS (through translator): She screamed terribly and yelled for help. Then I also heard a man screaming for help. Three times he yelled for help, just after her scream, your -- my lady, I heard four shots. It was four shots, gunshots I heard. It was very traumatic for me. You could hear that it was blood-curdling screams.
(END AUDIO CLIP)
GUILFOYLE: That is very important testimony because you have somebody who was, you know, a near witness at the time that this is going down to tell the sequence of events, which is very important to tell if this was something intentional, if it was an accident, did he mistake her for an intruder. But what you heard there, is you heard her saying that she heard her yelling. Perhaps, you think you will realize, OK, that's a female voice. I'm living with my girlfriend. Maybe I shouldn't shoot.
BOLLING: So, can I quickly throw this in here? So, the way it works, it's not a jury, it's a judge, right? The judge --
GUILFOYLE: They're referring to as "my lady."
BOLLING: Right, right, my lady.
But the problem is the defense, Pistorius' lawyer is saying it was him yelling. Yet, when he yells, he has a very high voice that sounds like a woman yelling. You really --
GUILFOYLE: The witness said she heard two different people yelling, a man and woman.
BOLLING: They're actually claiming --
GUILFOYLE: It's all him, right.
BOLLING: It's him yelling. And so, you run the risk of a judge who probably has a lot -- she has a lot more going on than they're giving her credit for, saying you must be kidding me. You are going to tell me Oscar Pistorius is yelling and his voice is so high, your witness thought it was someone else? But it's so ridiculous, so condescending. This guy --
GUILFOYLE: It might work in front of a jury, but maybe not in front of a seasoned judge.
BECKEL: Did she not say she heard two people who cried for help, she heard a woman and she heard a man?
GUILFOYLE: Yes, but --
BECKEL: Now, if you're Oscar Pistorius people, why would you just say as a lawyer, yes, he went in, he was crying for help, too, because he found her --
BOLLING: Why did he shot her?
GUILFOYLE: No, but look at the sequence of events.
BECKEL: Because he was scared of her, I don't know.
GUILFOYLE: Dana, you heard something else that was important.
PERINO: That to me was the first time I heard that an ear witness, which I never knew that was -- that was called, that there had been two -- she heard two -- the witness said two distinct voices. So, to me, that was new information.
GUILFOYLE: But then you also brought up a point, why was he yelling for help? If you heard the male voice before the shots were fired, is he yelling because it's an intruder, he doesn't realize that that's her yelling?
PERINO: I guess. She doesn't look -- I don't know, I don't see how behind a door she could be that ferocious.
BECKEL: He thought there was somebody coming into the house.
Anyway, Greg, would you go to the house? Were you there?
GUTFELD: No, I wasn't. I think the interesting fact of this is that
Oscar Pistorius has a new girlfriend, 22-year-old paramedic. You've always got to wonder what she says to her friends and family about her new boyfriend when they ask. "Oh, he's single. Yes, he killed his ex- girlfriend."
Their first thought is, you cannot be that lonely. There are so many men out there. Why do you have to go and choose a man who just killed his ex-girlfriend? It's like, now we know why he's back on the market. By the way, this is why we don't need Greek tragedies anymore. Because we have something that unfolds every day.
GUILFOYLE: She'll be looking for love on South African Match.com and not with him.
Still ahead, could America become a nation of potheads if more states legalize marijuana like Colorado and Washington? A warning from California's liberal governor about reefer madness next.
BECKEL: California and Washington have legalized marijuana, but it doesn't seem like California is going to be following suit anytime soon.
Liberal Governor Jerry Brown has concerns about America turning into a nation of stoners. Here's Jerry.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
GOV. JERRY BROWN (D), CALIFORNIA: The problem with anything, a certain amount is OK, but there is a tendency to go to extremes. And all of a sudden, if there's advertising and legitimacy, how many people can get stoned and still have a great state or a great nation? The world is pretty dangerous, very competitive. I think we need to stay alert, if not 24 hours a day, more than some of the potheads might be able to put together.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
BECKEL: Let me just add a little personal note. I've monitored, anchored a debate in 1988 between presidential candidates where Jerry Brown was one, and he was then pushing out his 800-number to get money. And I talked to him afterwards. I said what do you think about the legalization of marijuana? You've got a lot of them in your state?
He said, "I think everybody's -- it's all overblown about what marijuana does to you. They would just be fine."
Now I will understand this, as governor, given the state, if I thought one state where the population would be more stoned than any other state, it probably would be California. And he's worried about it. But let's keep him behind the -- Jerry has changed his opinion about this.
BOLLING: It's interesting. Partially probably because the medicinal, there are a lot of pot dispensaries in California. It's like there's one...
GUILFOYLE: Go to San Francisco.
BOLLING: ... every corner like a Starbucks. They're still getting the revenue, so it's not -- maybe they don't see the issue that they need more. However, you look at Denver, $134 million of tax and seed revenue coming into the state of Colorado.
PERINO: And I'm sure it's being used very wisely.
BOLLING: If anyone is more broke than California...
GUILFOYLE: Right. Give the government more money.
BOLLING: ... the second most broke state in the union besides Illinois, if I'm not mistaken. So maybe they'll do it.
PERINO: I agree with him that he should -- I don't see anything wrong with letting Colorado and Washington experiment, play out for a little bit longer before he commits California to it. I think that that's fine. Let them see how it goes. I don't think that everybody needs to be in such a hurry.
BECKEL: Greg, you think what he was referring to there was the -- a lot of people are going to be so stoned, they aren't going to be able to do their jobs? Is that what he was...
GUTFELD: Yes. Perhaps. As you know, I mean, I -- as you know, I'm pro-legalization of just about every drug on the planet, but I'm aware of the concern that pot diminishes one's ambition. Everybody has a friend that they knew that was very smart and bright who just kind of faded away.
But having said that, you can't legislate everybody because of that.
And pot did not fly planes into our buildings. I'm always thinking that maybe one answer to a death cult is feeling good. Suicide rates are dropping in states where there's medical marijuana. And that's because of an increased psychological well-being. Maybe it wouldn't be a bad thing if a bunch of angry men started getting high.
BECKEL: Kimberly, you lived in California. You were a pothead.
GUILFOYLE: No, I wasn't.
BECKEL: Do you think...
GUILFOYLE: I was a prosecutor.
BECKEL: Oh, I'm sorry. What do you think about what Brown is saying here? Do you think it really...
GUILFOYLE: I like his measured approach. I think he's doing the right thing. Like why not wait and see? Let the other states test it out.
They're already getting some revenue stream in California. So maybe he thinks this is not the right time to go, you know, overboard on it. And God knows, yes, that California has some serious financial concerns. You know, he's a smart guy, like I said before during the break, Jesuit- educated, really bright.
GUTFELD: Legalization should not be based on taxation.
PERINO: I agree. I agree.
GUTFELD: It should be based on legalization and making money, not making money for the man.
BECKEL: Jerry, just keep that doobie available for yourself, will you?
"One More Thing" is up next.
GUILFOYLE: Thank you for the nice...
PERINO: OK, I told Greg it's time for "One More Thing."
GUTFELD: Oh, my gosh. I can't believe it. Awesome.
Anyway, this is why I never work outside. I prefer to do everything inside a warm studio. Hey, thanks -- thanks for giving me the time to explain it. Anyway, that's what happened.
PERINO: When does that happen to you, Greg? You would still be digging.
GUTFELD: That is so true. So true. I'm taller than you, Dana.
PERINO: I told people that this weekend when I was in California.
Kimberly, you're next.
GUILFOYLE: Oh, hi. Thanks so much. A lot of people on Twitter were saying poor Leo, poor Leo, because this guy's been nominated. He hasn't won yet.
PERINO: Leo who?
The best performance of his lifetime in "Wolf of Wall Street." He lost out to this guy, Matthew McConaughey. He gave a great speech, was also very deserving, sort of the critics' favorite for this year.
But, you know, Leo also lost out, he got nominated for "Blood Diamond," and you remember "The Last King of Scotland"? Forest Whitaker got it for that one, and he was very good.
GUTFELD: So I guess...
PERINO: You're like our own personal Oscar historian.
Get it? Oscar historian, not Pistorius? Eric, you're next.
GUTFELD: A really bad pun.
PERINO: A Monday pun. It's a Monday pun. Eric, you're next.
BOLLING: OK, I have no "One More Thing," so I just decided to relate my weekend for you. Here's -- picture this: 12 episodes of "House of Cards," one episode of "Walking Dead" and one hour of the Oscars. Maybe an hour and a half of the Oscars. But Dana has turned me onto "House of Cards," and I'm going to tell you, it's the best show.
GUILFOYLE: I'm going to do it, too, so we can talk about it.
BOLLING: Here's the weird thing: You binge watch this. So there's now 26 episodes available on Netflix.
GUILFOYLE: You did 12, you said?
BOLLING: I did 12 in a day and a half.
GUILFOYLE: OK. Did you also watch "Scandal"? Because we watch "Scandal."
PERINO: I'm iffy on that one. I've watched it a couple times. It's pretty good.
GUILFOYLE: Greg and I like it.
PERINO: Bob, you're next.
BECKEL: The -- the oldest woman in the world, Misao Okawa, died at
116 years of age. She bridged three centuries. Her husband died, believe it or not, 83 years ago.
GUILFOYLE: Why are you laughing?
BECKEL: I just -- 83 years is a long time for your husband to have died, to live that long. But she said her secret was sushi and sleep.
PERINO: In that order?
GUILFOYLE: I love it.
BECKEL: Did she die?
BECKEL: She's still alive? Sorry, I thought you said she was dead.
It's her birthday. I'm sorry.
GUILFOYLE: Oh, my gosh! The worst "One More Thing" ever.
BECKEL: I buried her.
GUILFOYLE: What's wrong with you?
BECKEL: I'm sorry.
GUILFOYLE: What is wrong with you?
BECKEL: Happy birthday, sweetheart.
GUILFOYLE: Bob, it says right here, 116th birthday.
BECKEL: I thought she died at 116. I'm sorry, babe. I'm glad you're still alive and all that.
BOLLING: Joe Biden -- Biden did the same thing.
PERINO: Glad to hear you're single.
GUILFOYLE: Oh, my gosh, Bob.
PERINO: I have 20 seconds. OK, in the category of what will they think of next, I saw that Oral B has figured out a way to hook up your toothbrush to your phone. So you can be brushing your teeth and on your phone at the same time to see if you're brushing your teeth correctly.
GUILFOYLE: Oh, my God. You're not going to do that, are you? Are you going to do that?
PERINO: How did we do it without this, right? Don't forget to set your DVRs. Never miss an episode of "The Five." And "Special Report" is next.
GUILFOYLE: What is going on with you?
Content and Programming Copyright 2014 Fox News Network, LLC. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. Copyright 2014 CQ-Roll Call, Inc. All materials herein are protected by United States copyright law and may not be reproduced, distributed, transmitted, displayed, published or broadcast without the prior written permission of CQ-Roll Call. You may not alter or remove any trademark, copyright or other notice from copies of the content.