This is a rush transcript from "The Five," November 15, 2013. This copy may not be in its final form and may be updated.
GREG GUTFELD, CO-HOST: Hello, everyone. I'm Greg Gutfeld, along with Andrea Tantaros, Bob Beckel, Eric Bolling, and she sleeps on a bed of stuffed kittens, it's Dana Perino.
It's 5 o'clock somewhere.
GUTFELD: Remember way back when, when you noted failures, the media called you a racist? Apology accepted.
Remember when you were curious about Fast and Furious, the media called you a racist? Apology accepted.
Remember when you questioned the health care bill at town halls, that meant that you hated black people? Apology accepted.
Remember the Tea Parties uniting over small government? They were called bigots, too? Apology accepted.
Remember your anger that the IRS targeted Obama critics, that meant your hated a black president? Apology accepted.
Remember as you fretted over the economy, MSNBC called you racist for expecting better. Apology accepted.
Remember Benghazi, just saying that made you racist? Apology accepted.
And remember when voting for Obama once but not twice meant you were racist from the start? Apology accepted.
Yes, I'm a forgiving type. It's time to retire this racialism, the engine that enabled the ObamaCare disaster. A disaster that in its present state causes much suffering to Americans, minorities included.
If you disagree with me, you're racist. Because why else would you defend this abject failure? It's the bigotry of low standards. You just don't expect competence from a black leader. And by smearing helpful critics, your prejudice slip by, you weren't hiding under a hood but you didn't have to. You had the false armor of political correctness as cover.
But as everyone is finally admitting, our emperor in the White House has no clothes. Hell, even Obama admits ObamaCare's a disaster. I guess he's racist, too.
Hopefully, this whole thing is ending, A.T., because race-baiting in my feeling has provided a shield that allowed Obama to fail, because everybody was scared.
ANDREA TANTAROS, CO-HOST: Yes, so no one focused on what was actually in the bill.
TANTAROS: They were too busy focusing on who is criticizing him and are there racial undertones to that racism?
By the way, you said he has no clothes, I think you're anti-nudist now, too, Greg. So, there's another thing that we can add to that list, the prejudices.
GUTFELD: That is so true. I should be encouraging it, although I've seen, if you look at his -- for people that work for him, I don't want him to be nude.
Bob, is it a problem obvious here that if all criticism is deemed racist, that no one will criticize?
BOB BECKEL, CO-HOST: Yes. But I don't agree with the premise. I mean, I know we're going to pick out some -- we've got some sound on tape here about some liberals who have made comments about people being racist.
But the lion's share, massive majority of people on the left do not believe that people are racist because they disagree with Barack Obama. I don't believe that gives people cover for anything.
I don't know we seem to make these things up as they come along, because some liberal opens his mouth and says the wrong thing.
GUTFELD: I had to disagree with you, because being here for 2 1/2 years -- Eric, how many stories have we done on this very topic?
ERIC BOLLING, CO-HOST: And it's usually the Michael Moore or Bill Maher who claims, you know, if you disagree with Barack Obama, clearly, you don't get it, you must be a racist. I got to disagree.
Also, a lot of Democrats now are jumping ship on ObamaCare. Are they racist? Thirty-nine House members voted in favor of upholding Congressman Upton's bill. That if you want to keep your insurance, you can. Are they racist?
BECKEL: This is where it's getting a little confusing already here.
I don't understand. We're try to make the connection with ObamaCare. When you talk about Michael Moore, Michael Moore does not represent a vast majority of the Democratic Party or liberals or anything else.
BOLLING: OK, Oprah says because he's a black president, Joe Wilson yelled out -- I know we're playing it. They're yelling in my ear we're going to play it.
But let's do it then. Otherwise, Bob says you guys are making stuff up. No, the people on left, a lot of the Barack Obama supporters --
BECKEL: A lot of?
BOLLING: His money people in Hollywood say if you don't agree with him it's likely because you're racist.
GUTFELD: You know what, let's play that SOT. This is Oprah on the BBC. I don't know what the BBC is. I think it's a type of candy.
She says criticism --
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Ever crossed your mind some of the treatment Obama and the challenges he's faced and some of the reporting he's received is because he's an African-American?
OPRAH WINFREY, TALK SHOW HOST: Probably it's crossed my mind more times than it's crossed your mind. Think there's a level of disrespect for the office that occurs and that occurs in some cases and maybe even many cases because he's African-American.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
GUTFELD: Dana, you're a huge Oprah fan. Do you agree or disagree?
DANA PERINO, CO-HOST: I disagree with her on this. I think from a communications standpoint and reality is she believes it. There's a lot of people that believe this. And it did not necessarily start with the Tea Party or anybody that was conservative or Republican. Remember in 2000, during the Clinton -- during the Clinton/Obama primary, in South Carolina, the word went out that Bill Clinton was a racist.
PERINO: And the Obama people, hands off, it's all right, we don't know who did it. But they know exactly who did it.
They've been using this as political wedge for a long time. How do we get beyond it? That's something I've been thinking about today.
I really think you need a person who is going to -- a leader who can be like a Ronald regular type and bring people together, because we're not going to see it in the next three years.
GUTFELD: Yes. And it was the Hillary campaign that had pushed the whole --
TANTAROS: Birth certificate issue.
TANTAROS: That's where it started, on the Democratic side. That's where you see some of the worst kinds of racism, but they hide it. So, if Hillary Clinton gets elected, then are we all anti-women or woman? Is that
going to be the --
GUTFELD: That will be the strategy.
TANTAROS: I just have a point on Oprah. Let me ask Oprah -- I'd love to ask her this question. If somebody like President Obama was working at her company, Harpo, and had done something the equivalent of ObamaCare at Harpo, do we think for one second Obama would keep him employed, white, black or anything?
The beauty of Oprah was she didn't play the race card in her career.
She created a product that everybody wanted to buy. President Obama has created a mess that nobody wanted to own including himself.
BECKEL: Oprah here is talking about specifically Joe Wilson, the congressman from South Carolina, who yelled out to Obama "you lie."
GUTFELD: Cherry picking, Bob.
GUTFELD: Cherry picking like you say.
BECKEL: Yes, she's picking one person and making that -- same thing this segment is doing. But does anybody believe -- I have to say this, I wonder whether Joe Wilson would have said the same thing to Clinton.
BOLLING: You remember what he said "you lie" about?
BECKEL: Yes, it was about ObamaCare. If Bill Clinton had said the same thing, I just don't -- I don't believe --
TANTAROS: Plenty of Republicans said Bill Clinton lied, Bob. Does that make them what then?
BECKEL: Stand up to the House of Representatives --
TANTAROS: They did it all the --
BECKEL: Depraved --
TANTAROS: Because Bill Clinton did lie. All of a sudden we're racist because we disagree with the Democratic president?
BECKEL: No, you don't stand up in the middle of the House of Representatives and call the president and say "you lie" to the president of the United States.
BOLLING: Honestly, we believe this and people on the right believe that this that Obama care is a major drastic change, violating the Constitution. But changed the way we've done business in the country for
BECKEL: What does that have to do with racist?
BOLLING: No, it doesn't. It wasn't racist. It was Joe Wilson yelling "you lie" because President Obama was talking about changing the way -- he completely changed. He took something that was a product, that was not a fine or a fee or a tax, and mandated something, mandated the American people to buy a product.
It's never been done before. It's against the Constitution. And people on the right, including Joe Wilson at the time were ticked off.
BECKEL: Do you think that bum should have been allowed to say that on the floor of the House of Representatives?
BOLLING: No, I don't --
BOLLING: Although in England, you know, parliament --
GUTFELD: By the way, speaking of which, if disrespect means racism, then how can you explain George W. Bush? Who I think was the beneficiary of more disrespect than Obama ever encountered as president. I mean, the vitriol directed at him --
PERINO: Well, especially, the war in Iraq had everybody's emotions very raw. So it's the comparison to today is probably not exact.
But when the speaker of the House and the leader of the Senate started calling the president a liar and a loser, that basically I think broke the dam on civility. So, I don't think Joe Wilson was the first. I think that started with the top.
GUTFELD: Yes. Let's go to a nutbag by a he name of Oliver Stone.
This is what he has to say about what the Republicans are doing to the United States.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
OLIVER STONE, FILMMAKER: I don't know why these Republican white people frankly, the McConnells and the -- they're strange to me. They -- it's almost as if we're in an apartheid state and they're still fighting for the rights of whites in South Africa. It's like they're still scared.
I would think that they're very scared that this country is going to
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: That's what I was getting at. They're threatened by something. It may not be the he's doing anything, but they are threatened by something.
STONE: He's threatened by the fact he is black and that's enough.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
GUTFELD: Andrea, it seems like Oliver Stone is living in one of his movies from 1975, like he has not seen progress. He hasn't left his house.
TANTAROS: He hasn't left L.A. or wherever he lives in his bubble.
So, yes, just like we talked about earlier in the week with Richard Cohen from "The Washington Post."
Greg, an example of racism worse than we've seen on the right. Oliver Stone, Republican white people? But there's no outrage about that? He can just label white people as being bad and Republicans and racist and get away with it.
You know, President Obama was elected with a tremendous amount of goodwill. And the first thing he did with the Democratic Congress and the will of the people -- a lot of people were on his side to reform health care. He got a total pass on that. He did. They let him do it.
People questioned that was going to be his first legislative accomplishment, why not the economy? No, he did health care.
And now, look, what we're getting. I mean, people went out of their way to not criticize him and give him that pass and let him do what he wanted.
BECKEL: Don't you think this is a huge reach we're playing here?
Oliver Stone? Is he supposed to represent the Democratic Party, the left?
I mean, come on. This guy, we don't pay attention to this guy.
BOLLING: He's saying that, no matter who it is --
BECKEL: I dint even know he was still alive to be honest with you.
BOLLING: We'll roll a sound bite of a lefty saying something as ridiculous as Oliver Stone says or Oprah says or Bill Maher says, or it just goes on and on.
BECKEL: -- right wingers -- I mean, if I had all the editors available to me to pick out the --
GUTFELD: They're easy. These are everywhere. Every week, there's at least 5 percent --
BECKEL: And you don't think we had enough people looking for what conservative right wingers say, we couldn't come up with a package like this?
GUTFELD: I think there are a number of wackos on both sides, there's just more on your side.
PERINO: Also, I think that there is a difference in terms -- when it comes from Hollywood, and you talked about this in terms of the culture and popular media. When you have someone as big a star as Oprah who says -- when she says it, I think she's being sincere. She really believes that.
Then you have Oliver Stone who basically -- these are the leaders of most of the ways people get information in the United States. I do think that is different than finding some two-bit congressman or state representative in North Carolina who might have said something at some point in his career. To me, there's a big difference.
GUTFELD: There's no impact on pop culture. That's a good point.
"New York Times" made this comparison to ObamaCare, to hurricane Katrina. Can I read this very long quote?
"The disastrous rollout not only threatened the rest of his agenda but also raises questions about his competence, in the same way that the Bush administration botched response to Hurricane Katrina undermined any semblance of Republican efficiency."
Eric, so, there is a difference here. President Bush did not create Katrina.
BOLLING: Right, right. One is a natural disaster. One is a self- inflicted mortal wound.
GUTFELD: He's an oil man so he actually caused it.
PERINO: There were people that said that.
BECKEL: There's a connection there.
BOLLING: I think the end result's going to be the same though. This is going to be a lasting impression on the Obama legacy. It's hard for him to ever get over.
BECKEL: -- ask your political analysis, I tell you that.
TANTAROS: Except Katrina affected one region --
BECKEL: Obviously, it's going to be a negative on him. I mean, how are you going to reverse something?
TANTAROS: You can't.
BOLLING: Let's talk about this. He'll never reverse this. This will go with him for the rest of his entire life. When you look back 30 or 40 years from now, remember Barack Obama, oh, yes, he's the guy who blew ObamaCare.
TANTAROS: Katrina was one region. This is across the country.
Bob, how do you think he actually overcomes this? Honestly.
BECKEL: I don't think he does overcome it in the short term. I don't think -- for three years, he does. But I'm not ready to say this doesn't -
- I mean, I go back for single payer. But if you have to leave with something, I'd much prefer to live with this than live with the insurance company and the free market trying to decide who's going to be healthy and who's not.
BOLLING: There it is --
BECKEL: Talk about pick and choose. They'll pick and choose wealthy people over poor people.
PERINO: No, what they're talking (ph) today is corporate welfare.
GUTFELD: Yes, and also the middle class didn't fare too well either.
But the great thing is, even in this catastrophe for ObamaCare, "New York Times" has to bring Bush into this.
TANTAROS: They can't help themselves.
PERINO: I was a spokesperson for the press secretary that was in charge of the Department of Homeland Security for the Katrina issue. We all dealt with that at the White House. It was all hands on deck. It was a horrible, period.
If I'm being charitable to "The New York Times", if they're talking about the political aftermath, and I don't think the two issues are at all comparable, but the political aftermath in disarray with the White House and how that had to get fixed, and it did, several months later, that's what I think they're talking about.
BOLLING: Can I also just throw this last thought in here? The right warned about ObamaCare.
BOLLING: There was no Katrina warning --
PERINO: Actually, President Bush did tell them to evacuate.
GUTFELD: All right. We must evacuate but only for a little bit.
Hours after President Obama told you he wants to win back your trust, he vowed to push back against those who don't trust his health care plan.
Plus, the wait is over. You know it's my favorite thing of the week, Facebook Friday. Yes, that was my nickname in high school.
Anyway, your chance to ask us all sorts stuff. Log on at Facebook.com/TheFiveFNC. That's really easy, you know? We'll answer some of the questions later.
TANTAROS: Yesterday, President Obama played humble and contrite in a desperate attempt to win back the trust of the American people.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
BARACK OBAMA, PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES: Problems of the Web site have prevented too many Americans from completing the enrollment process. And that's on us. It's legitimate to expect me to have to win back some credibility.
That's on me. That's on us. That's on me. It's not on them, it's on us. This one's deserved, right? It's on us.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
TANTAROS: But just a couple hours later, the real president emerged again with a warning for those who dare not support ObamaCare.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
OBAMA: We are not going to gut this law. We will fix what needs to be fixed, but we're going to make the Affordable Care Act work and those who say they're opposed to it and can't offer a solution, we'll push back.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
TANTAROS: He's already pushing back after 261 lawmakers in the House, including 39 Democrats, voted today on a measure to let insurance companies sell health coverage to anyone regardless of whether the plans meet the president's own standards.
Now, the White House says the bill was designed to undermine ObamaCare and the president will veto it if it gets to his desk.
Eric, I can't even follow this. Just a week ago, Jay Carney was standing at the podium calling these plans substandard. And our friend Bob here was saying, oh, these they were terrible anyway, they shouldn't worry about keeping them. Now, he wants people to keep them?
Aren't these plans illegal, by the way, by definition? Aren't they in violation of his law?
BOLLING: With the law that he created? By going around Congress and then change and now wants to change back?
I'm not sure where he is. He used the executive pen more than I do when I make my notes here.
So he golfed through Fast and Furious. He went to Vegas while Benghazi was still burning. Hours after his big fix to ObamaCare, he's fund-raising again, going backtracking -- I think it's really, it's disingenuous.
Really, yesterday, I said, if this was CEO Obama and ObamaCare was ObamaCare Inc, those shareholders would carry him out. American people unfortunately have stuck with this guy. I just hope in 2014, everyone who is running against a Democrat who supported this bill through law makes everyone realize exactly what they supported and pay for it.
TANTAROS: And, Dana, this effort in the House, this Upton bill, it's similar to what the president a saying, right, if you can keep your plan.
The White House is saying we're going to veto this if this ends up on his desk.
Now, you know, Harry Reid has no intention of taking up these bills in the Senate. What did that say when the White House -- does it just reek of politics when they're looking at the House going, oh, we'll veto it if you try and do it?
PERINO: This is like the 39 bills the House Republicans have passed that would help on the economy, they go nowhere in the Senate? That happens when you have a split Congress. Either way, you can choose to bring it up or not. I think the fact that Harry Reid and the Senate doesn't intend to do anything about this actually might -- he might get bigger pushback from some of the red state Democrats because as you had zero Republicans vote for ObamaCare in 2010, you had 39 Democrats.
So, obviously, a vote today, they know they have a political problem.
And the White House probably looked at those 39 and said we understand you got to do what you got to do in order to try to win re-election. We'll let you go on this one.
But the problem is no one believes that either the president's fix or the Upton fix in the long run is going to solve anything. Pretty much an exercise in futility. And someone is going to ruin Thanksgiving and it will be the Democrats.
TANTAROS: Yes, I don't -- this isn't -- I don't see how this does anything. I don't see how insurance companies go back to their old plans.
I don't see how people can keep their plans interminably.
So, what happens then? Then, he gets blamed? The insurers? I mean, this is just putting off absolute destruction.
GUTFELD: Yes. The thing is I wonder if President Obama really cares about the consequences of this, because in a way, he's like D.B. Cooper, he's already pulled off this amazing height. It's made history with one of the greatest wealth transfers ever.
And now that you've got all these bodies in all this mess, it doesn't matter, because it's historical. The only upside to this is that I really do believe he's helped the Republican Party, because the Republican Party needed a good churn. And he helped rebuild the right by inflating the perniciousness of the left.
I mean, this has created such a convulsion in America that perhaps you're creating new leaders.
One point I got out of reason, Cuccinelli in Virginia, he lost but he won the youth vote. He won the youth vote handily, which means the time is right to target the youth who have been betrayed by Obama's wealth removal machine. And Republicans have to explain why they're better than that.
TANTAROS: Bob, Democrats running for the tall grass on this one. But how can they escape? A lot of these Democrats, the footage of them try to push for this bill, trying to say that this was a good plan, this was a fair deal. Now, all a sudden, they're trying to save people from the plan.
How big of a task is that?
BECKEL: First of all, these 39, as I look down in, about 34 of them are in districts questionable for Democrats, so I can understand why they're playing politics the way they are. If I was there consultant, I would say the same thing. Line up on this one. It's a vote you have to make.
Is it going anywhere? No. You're right, it's split government -- it's split legislatures. We didn't want the 39 bills from the House because we didn't believe they were going to do anything. Except disastrous.
Now, that's the prerogative of being in the majority, right? Now, in this case, I don't know whether you can accept the fact it was only 12 months ago the people of the United States re-elected this president. Now, whether you like that or not, the fact of the matter is, he is here.
Something needs to get done.
It seems to be just once -- just once the Republicans can lean back and say, you know, you've gotten kicked enough. You deserved what you got here, Mr. President. So let's sit down and see what we can work down.
Like the Democrats did with George Bush on his prescription drug deal.
PERINO: Is that -- is that in rules for radicals, is there some chapter I didn't see, you let up on your opposition?
TANTAROS: Why should Republicans sit back and say let's see what we can work out? I think Republicans should say you deal with it. It has your name.
BECKEL: Because you have 40 million people who are uninsured in this country. That's why the Republicans should do it. There are poor people uninsured because the Republicans don't want to deal with it.
TANTAROS: Bob, more people are uninsured now than before. It didn't work.
BOLLING: Ten years down the road, guess how many --
BECKEL: I don't think the Republican Party cares much about people getting insured.
GUTFELD: We're awful people, all of us.
PERINO: We hate people, and we're racist.
GUTFELD: I hate babies and old people. I only like myself.
TANTAROS: I'm an awful person because I have to cut everyone off.
We've got to go to break.
Our Facebook free for all is coming up on "The Five". Yes, that's right. Log on to our page right now, post any questions you have for us, Facebook.com/TheFiveFNC. And we'll answer a bunch of them, ahead.
And up next, the muscles from Brussels wows the world again with a new sensational split show. The question is, though, is it real?
PERINO: All right. In today's society, capitalism has become somewhat of a dirty word. A lot of kids are being taught in America's schools that it's a bad thing to profit from success.
Same thing is true in Britain and the country's prime minister wants to change that. Here's David Cameron.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
DAVID CAMERAON, BRITISH PRIME MINISTER: We need to support reward and celebrate enterprise. That requires a fundamental change of culture in our country -- a culture that's on the side of those who work hard, that values typically British entrepreneurial, buccaneering spirit, and that rewards people with the ambition to make things, sell things and create jobs for others up and down the country.
I want to make sure it is boosted everywhere, promoted in schools, taught in colleges, celebrated in communities.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
PERINO: No, Bob, he said buccaneering spirit. So don't worry. He doesn't have to put any money into the swear jar.
Greg, that was very "Downton Abbey."
GUTFELD: Smashing speech by that young fellow.
PERINO: But the Millennium Development Goals basically said that 1 billion people have been taken out of extreme poverty in 20 years, largely due to capital ideas.
So, what he's saying he wants to bring capitalistic ideas and teaching back in schools. Good idea?
GUTFELD: Yes, don't accept the principles of your losers which is what's happening in the United States. We're moving towards countries that we vanquished.
Kids, their idea of an economy stops at their dad's wallet. They don't connect costs to consequences. You got to treat capitalism in school like it's a sport. But it's a sport any kid can play, including little guys like me. You can compete. You can play stocks.
You could have -- you could have socialism for a day, where you imagine government mandating that everybody has a right to an iPhone but the iPhone must have an air bag so the iPhone must be the size of a baby's head and weigh 40 bounds because that's how government works. And then, the next day you have capitalism for a day. Fair and balanced.
PERINO: And your iPhone has no baby head.
PERINO: I love it.
Eric, we talked before that your favorite class that you ever took was your economics class that you --
BOLLING: Loved it. Yes.
PERINO: You think this is a good idea?
BOLLING: I think it's a great idea, but I think they get socialism every other day so they at least get one day of capitalism, all the redistribution. It's refreshing to hear Cameron say that. It's refreshing to hear a leader stand up and say, we need more capitalism.
The truth is, you're right, it brings people out of poverty, grew this nation into the powerhouse it is, even though President Obama wants to push away from it to more -- don't laugh. A man, a redistributive, progressive socialist in person --
BECKEL: Yes, you're a hyper-capitalist, Wall Street --
BOLLING: I am, and I'm proud of it, Bob. And I'm darn proud of it.
BOLLING: I've been called a narco capitalist. Let me tell you something, it's about time --
BOLLING: A narco capitalist.
BECKEL: I think it's drugs.
BOLLING: It's about time you stand up for the system that works.
PERINO: Let me mention something, Andrea. You grew up living capitalism. You were working for your dad's business. The people of Britain are a very generous people. But you need to have a growing economy and have money in your pocket in order to be generous. Maybe that would be a different way of looking at this if you're in Britain.
TANTAROS: Also, I think Cameron's trying to stem the trend of Europe.
He's got the French very close by. He's got the Greeks. He sees what's happening in these cultures.
I think the British are a little bit more advanced. I mean that because they hit rock bottom first. And the country pivoted towards David Cameron, towards conservative.
We pivoted towards Barack Obama, and more liberalism. I think it's a great lesson for kids. And the easiest one is the one that You take a little kid, the little kid gets an "A" and you say, the guy who sits next to you got an "F", so you're both going to get C's. That's called redistribution. That's the easiest lesson for kids to learn.
PERINO: Hey, Bob. You know, the president of France, Hollande, guess what his approval rating was today.
PERINO: Fifteen percent.
BECKEL: There you go.
PERINO: By comparison, President Obama is doing great.
BECKEL: Socialism is dying everywhere. I guess we'll have to meet in a phone booth.
Listen, I don't agree with the idea that everybody in the whole American education system is teaching socialism and is against capitalism.
But I would say this, I will say just teach them how to make out a check, how to put a budget together, some simple things about how to deal with your money. That to me is something -- instead of turning me into an ATM.
That's what my kids are, they go to me and they go --
GUTFELD: It's a metaphor for the government --
BOLLING: Who is going to teach Obama how to put a budget together?
That would be a great idea.
BECKEL: -- American public schools, teach them how to do some simple things --
GUTFELD: A debt limit is smart.
PERINO: We've been having so much fun that we run of time.
Stay right there. Our Facebook free for all is coming up and we've got a big surprise for you that you're not going to want to miss. Don't go away.
BOLLING: Facebook Friday. We've got a stack of questions in this hermetically sealed envelope in a moment. But, first, before, we want to wish our dear friend Bob here a happy birthday, Robert Beckel.
BOLLING: We were hiding this the whole time.
So let's get -- I have a hunch maybe some of these questions --
BECKEL: Moving right along.
GUTFELD: Moving right along.
BOLLING: No, because the questions are going to have to do maybe -- all right.
First question, what will be Bob's birthday wish if he knew it would come true?
TANTAROS: It's a family show, Bob.
BECKEL: I appreciate you asked me that question, pal, but I'd get myself in a whole lot of trouble if I answered it. Let me just put it this way, it would be at night. It would not be alone. It would be a lot of fun. But yes --
TANTAROS: A midnight movie.
BECKEL: That's right.
And a good meal and a good --
BECKEL: Bolling, yes, sure.
BOLLING: I was thinking --
GUTFELD: You want to hang out with Eric Bolling?
TANTAROS: Eric Bolling's your birthday wish?
BOLLING: All right. We're moving right along.
Number two, Monica D. asked, do you have a hot date for your birthday?
If I weren't married, I would love to go on a date with you, Bob. I'd even pay.
PERINO: That would be different.
BECKEL: Yes, I do. It's very nice of you to say that. I do have --
BECKEL: Monica, right? Monica Lewinsky.
BOLLING: Yes, like that.
PERINO: Or Crowley.
BECKEL: Or Crowley. Right. Yes, I do.
Thank you very much for saying that. It's nice of you.
BOLLING: Number three. Happy birthday, Bob, by the way.
Number three for Greg. Christian R., "Greg, do you choose some of the music that lines up for your breaks? What is your favorite music genre?"
GUTFELD: I choose all of the music for my break, which is why it's so awesome. And why everybody here doesn't like it.
I like electronica. My favorite is Boards of Canada. Their new album I heartily recommend.
I also like a band called Fuzz, which is out of San Francisco. A great band. And, of course, the Melvins has a new record out which is excellent.
PERINO: You're Boards OF Canada --
BECKEL: I haven't heard of one of those groups.
GUTFELD: Boards of Canada is -- they're Scottish. They're obviously bigoted.
BOLLING: Dana is eating a cupcake.
All right, number four, this one's for you, Dana. Bette H. says, "Does Dana ever say a bad word?" If you only knew what goes on to the breaks, Bette.
PERINO: I have a few lined up in the cue.
TANTAROS: She has a trucker mouth.
PERINO: Nothing like my really good friend from North Carolina, though, whose mom doesn't know she cusses. You know whom I talking about.
BECKEL: Dana once said her mother wanted to wash my mouth out with soap. Let me tell you something, Dana's mom, if I were you, I'd get a crateful for her now because she's turned into an absolute --
PERINO: New York.
BOLLING: It might.
PERINO: I think New York.
BOLLING: Proximity to Mr. Gutfeld, perhaps. I don't know.
All right. For Eric, I'm going to read this, Kathryn W. asked, "How did you meet your wife and what advice do you give to your son about women?"
I won't go into the second part.
GUTFELD: Oh, you got to!
BECKEL: Come on.
BOLLING: All right. I met my wife at Elle Macpherson's birthday
party. A friend of mine said he had --
PERINO: Name dropper.
BOLLING: No, no, I know her. My friend said, would you like to come?
I'm like, yes, I'd love to go to a super model's birthday party. So I show up. And my wife's across the --
GUTFELD: Do you have a mustache?
BOLLING: I did. I had a goatee.
She was across the bar and I was leaving and some guy was hitting on her. I literally said to her, you're not going to fall for that line, are you? She said maybe not.
We ended up, make a long story short --
BECKEL: What a sweet little romance story.
BOLLING: Advice about women to my son, I really don't go there other than, perfectly honest with you -- be safe, buddy. Just be safe.
BECKEL: You can't live with them, you can't live without them and you can't shoot them.
BOLLING: To Andrea, from Robert B. --
TANTAROS: Wow, that's really sweet, Bob.
PERINO: Very romantic.
BOLLING: Not our Robert B. I assume.
What's your absolute favorite food?
TANTAROS: Oh, Asian.
TANTAROS: Yes, I like Asian food. I like Chinese food.
PERINO: What a traitor to your country.
TANTAROS: Oh, I'm sorry. Greek food.
PERINO: I'm for Velveeta.
TANTAROS: I like Chinese.
BOLLING: You pick up the phone and order what would it be?
TANTAROS: Chinese food.
TANTAROS: Or Thai food. I like Thai.
BOLLING: Thai's amazing.
All right. This for everyone --
TANTAROS: What a boring question.
BOLLING: What's your number one guilty pleasure? Ooh. Let's do a round of this, Greg. You got a guilty pressure?
GUTFELD: My guilty pleasure is I don't have any guilty pleasures. In fact, I hate guilty pleasures. I like everything that I do.
I drink. I do drugs. I sleep in streets. I don't care.
BOLLING: You're not guilty about any of it?
GUTFELD: I'm not guilty about nothing.
BOLLING: Do you have a guilty pleasure?
PERINO: Red wine and online shopping.
PERINO: Yes, if you do it together, you could end up with 27 tubes of toothpaste that you thought were travel sized but they're real sized. So, if you need any, let me know because I have 27 --
GUTFELD: You are nuts. You do it when you do Ambien, too, don't you?
PERINO: What are you talking about Ambien?
BOLLING: My guilty pleasure honestly is "The Walking Dead." I just love the zombie stuff. Crazy, I know. I'm sorry.
BECKEL: High-stakes poker game.
BOLLING: Why would you be guilty about that?
BECKEL: Because you can lose a whole lot of money.
PERINO: It's a sin.
BOLLING: Chinese food?
TANTAROS: Yes, more food please? No, dancing.
BECKEL: You're dancing? Why are you guilty about that? Is that a pole dance?
TANTAROS: I like to dance in my apartment. No, by myself, with or without vodka sometimes, and with my friends downtown when I don't know anyone in the establishment.
BOLLING: We got to go. We didn't get to this one. What are your middle names? Snooze (ph), and where will each of you be spending --
PERINO: What is your middle name, Bob?
BOLLING: We've got to go.
Still to come, John Claude van Damme in a new Volvo ad. Watch.
(VIDEO CLIP PLAYS)
BOLLING: Which fiver do you think could pull off that stunt? Here's my guess.
BECKEL: A good song. I don't know what it is. But it's a good song.
Have you seen this new Volvo ad starring the muscle from Brussel, also known as actor Jean Claude van Damme. He does this while suspended between two 18-wheelers. Watch this.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
JEAN CLAUDE VAN DAMME, ACTOR: I've been here before you. What you see is a body crafted to perfection. A pair of legs engineered to defy the laws of physics and a mindset to master the most epic of strengths.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
BECKEL: Man, that's got to hurt.
It's got over 10 million views on YouTube and a Volvo spokesperson says it's real. Are you buying that, Eric?
BOLLING: I get to go first on that one?
BOLLING: No. Because if he falls right there, he's done.
BECKEL: Do you think that's real that he did that?
TANTAROS: They're saying that it's real. You know what would make that video so much better if they were not playing Enya and played AC/DC "Highway to Hell." That would make it so much more badass.
TANTAROS: I used to be able to do a split like that in my gymnastics days. If I did that now, I'd be in a wheelchair.
BECKEL: Can you -- you can't do a split?
TANTAROS: Not anymore, I used to.
BECKEL: Can you still do a split?
PERINO: Not that way. The other way.
BECKEL: Can you do a real split really seriously?
GUTFELD: The other way?
PERINO: Not laterally but this way.
TANTAROS: Is that right leg or left leg first?
BECKEL: You can still do that?
BECKEL: You think this guy really did this really?
PERINO: No. I don't. I don't. No.
BECKEL: Is that all you have to say? No, I don't.
PERINO: It's really boring and the music is horrendous. If he was playing AC/DC it would be more believable.
TANTAROS: I agree.
BECKEL: Greg, what do you think?
GUTFELD: I think number one he's an inspiration to millions of young men who want to do splits.
PERINO: (INAUDIBLE) buy that this weekend.
GUTFELD: But you know the real point here is: you got to have a point
-- you got to have a plan B in life. My life is nothing but plan B's.
This is a man who did not diversify his life.
So when all the options ran out, he's doing splits between trucks. So I tell young people, don't just do a TV gig, write. Don't just write, do something else. Have three things in case one doesn't work out because then you're going to be doing that. Diversify.
TANTAROS: I think using splits in between trucks just in a different way.
GUTFELD: I go to a lot of truck stops, I make some extra money. I'm called captain lizard.
PERINO: I hope everyone tries that this weekend.
BECKEL: What? Tries that split?
BECKEL: Eric, were you ever able to do a split?
BECKEL: No? Did you ever come close to doing a split?
BOLLING: No. I'm really not that limber.
BECKEL: You should try it. It's really invigorating.
GUTFELD: I don't trust people that limber quite frankly.
BECKEL: Have you tried to do a split lately?
TANTAROS: You know what, it's the first thing I'm going to do after this show tonight. I'm serious. I'm going to see if I can still do it.
BECKEL: You should do that. And get the paramedics around when you do it.
All right. "One More Thing" is up next.
GUTFELD: The lotion's working. Thanks for asking.
It's time for "One More Thing". Roll the nexio (ph).
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
GUTFELD: I hate these people!
(END VIDEO CLIP)
GUTFELD: All right. There's been an outbreak of measles, an outbreak of whooping cough in adults, mumps. Why is this happening?
Because there are parents who are listening to quacks and celebrities telling them not to get their kids vaccinated. The consequence of this is that their kids are infecting other kids and there are kids actually dying and there are adults actually getting diseases that have been eradicated for decades.
So, get your kids vaccinated. And please do not listen to celebrities for health advice. I'm not a celebrity at all, so you can listen to me because I'm an expert. I was an editor of "Men's Health." That makes me almost a doctor.
All right. Where am I? Dana?
PERINO: OK. So, you know, it's Bob's birthday today. And we have a big annual date on Sunday. He's coming over for chili and some taco dip.
I thought it was pretty funny today. My husband had to go to Long Island where he's taking pilot lessons to learn to fly and I asked if he could stop by Wal-Mart to get Velveeta cheese to put in the crock pot to make the famous dip.
He calls me and tells me they're out of Velveeta. I was like, really, wow, Wal-Mart's out of Velveeta, that's kind of strange. And then he says "I'll stop by Whole Foods on my way home and try to get it."
Well, it turns out he didn't realize Velveeta is not real cheese and he wasn't asking for the right place, the location in the store for the store for the Velveeta. There's not a shortage of Velveeta. It's processed cheese product or something like that. But it's delicious.
GUTFELD: This is a great story.
PERINO: Is it better than Jean Claude Van Damme?
PERINO: Oh, that's not fair.
GUTFELD: Well, if you're going to have --
PERINO: Anyway, there was going to be a picture.
GUTFELD: If you're going to have taco chili, you might want medicated wipes as well.
PERINO: For who? Bob?
TANTAROS: Can we move on from that visual?
TANTAROS: OK, this is a better visual. A San Francisco teen had his wish come true by the Make a Wish Foundation. They transformed the entire city for a young leukemia patient, Miles Scott. He's 5 years old, he's in remission.
But the entire city pitched in the mayor's office and the San Francisco Giants, they turned the city into Gotham for this little boy.
They made his dream come true. He even has a Batmobile. You have Lamborghinis and all these other cars. It's so cool. What a neat thing to do for a little boy.
BECKEL: That's wonderful.
TANTAROS: Isn't that cool?
GUTFELD: How far could you push and make a wish? I want to be able to kill the villain.
I don't think you can do that. No, it's make a wish, right?
PERINO: Right. You can't make a wish come true.
GUTFELD: Exactly. Anyway.
Where am I? Eric?
BOLLING: Yes, it's me. Bob, you have one more thing, right?
BOLLING: All right. We're going to run out of time. I'll forego my time to Mr. Beckel.
Just me give me a favor. Just watch "Cashin' In" tomorrow. We'd deconstruct the ObamaCare from top to bottom.
BECKEL: Gee, that's nothing brand new. The deconstruction of ObamaCare?
Listen, we put up the fact that I had my 49th birthday today on the web page. And I want to tell you that there were thousands and thousands of people who left wonderful messages. I know I drive you crazy and I want to drive you crazy. That's probably one of my goals in life of you conservatives out there, although you're not all conservative conservatives.
But thank you very much. You've been kind to me and I appreciate that and I appreciate the well wishes and back at you. Thank you.
PERINO: Wait, now you have time for your one more thing.
BOLLING: All right. Real quickly. We deconstruct ObamaCare.
Tomorrow, we also highlight who's the worst president in modern American history? Is it Barack Obama?
BECKEL: Gee, there's a -- oh, wow. Oh, I see.
TANTAROS: I wonder who will win.
BOLLING: Tune in tomorrow at 11:30.
TANTAROS: Going to be a nail-biter.
GUTFELD: They both have great teeth. They have the best teeth. They have the greatest presidential teeth.
TANTAROS: The next president should have knocked out grill.
PERINO: No George Washington.
GUTFELD: George Washington had wooden teeth.
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