'Miller Time' State of the Union

Dennis Miller responds to the president's recent State of the Union address


This is a RUSH transcript from "The O'Reilly Factor," January 25, 2012. This copy may not be in its final form and may be updated.

Watch "The O'Reilly Factor" weeknights at 8 p.m. and 11 p.m. ET!

BILL O'REILLY, HOST: Thanks for staying with us. I'm Bill O'Reilly.

In the "Miller Time" segment tonight, let's bring in the sage of southern California who is in Los Angeles this evening. He has a take on the State of the Union last night.

What say you, Miller?

DENNIS MILLER, FOX NEWS CONTRIBUTOR: I say how hot was Shelly Fabares in "Clambake?" That's what I say.

O'REILLY: At least, somebody recognizes the beauty of that film.

MILLER: Jesus, I watched that two weeks ago.

Let's see. Last night, I didn't watch the State of the Union because I was in the mood for something a little less contentious and preachy about class warfare, so I watched a Blu Ray of "Les Mis." That's what I watched last night.

O'REILLY: OK, which, of course, is about the French revolution and ...

MILLER: Well, listen, I know what Obama -- Obama doesn't like guys like me. I didn't have much to start. I busted my hump. I made a buck. And I'm now I'm an imperious overlord. I get that, so I don't watch him anymore.

Until he gets contextual about all this stuff and stops being simplistic, I'm not going to watch him.

O'REILLY: All right, you know what? I don't blame you. I don't blame you.

I had a hard time sitting through it and they're paying me an enormous amount of money and I'm not paying my fair share in taxes of that salary, but that's why I watched it.

And I remember and I'm saying to myself, "Gee, he gives a good speech," and he does. The guy's excellent. Excellent.

MILLER: Yeah, great. Let him sell ShamWows. We've got a country to save.

O'REILLY: But I didn't want to watch it. I wanted to watch Gene Wilder in "Young Frankenstein." That kept going through my mind. That's what I really want to watch and I didn't want to watch that.

MILLER: Well, Frankenstein, a little less clunky about policy and let me say this about -- here's where the junction box in America.

On the one side, you've got a president. You take guys like Romney. Romney, who pays 35 on his original salary then 14 on his dividends from his stocks that he buys, and then the moment he croaks -- mix estate tax in there, by the way -- the moment he croaks they take another 55 and he's given $7 million over two years to charity. He's the problem.

Meanwhile, the "Time" Person of the Year is the guy who takes the dump on the squad car down in Wall Street at the Occupy movement. That's where we're at in America right now. I'm on the one side. He likes the other side. Let's have this election in November and get it on because we're not going to agree.

O'REILLY: OK and I think that's -- the lines are clearly drawn.

Now, Newt Gingrich, left for dead two weeks ago, roars back with his Howard Beale imitation. Roll the tape.


HOWARD BEALE, "NETWORK": I want you to get up right now and go to the window, open it, and stick your head out and yell, "I'm as mad as hell and I'm not going to take this anymore."


O'REILLY: Now, wasn't Gingrich brilliant? Wasn't he brilliant how he used the media and how -- and I write my newspaper column about that. You'll be able to see it on bill o' this evening -- tomorrow, I think I should say.

He just was brilliant. And he knew that King at CNN would just play right into his hands and then the hammer came out and, bang, and the whole campaign turns around. You've got to admire it.

MILLER: Well, listen, it was savvy. And, by the way, why did you just show the Glenn Beck clip? What was that all about?

O'REILLY: That wasn't Glenn Beck.

MILLER: Oh, I'm sorry.

O'REILLY: No, that was humor, Paddy Chayefsky's.

MILLER: Listen, Gingrich went to South Carolina and he mustered up his courage and he asked the Palmetto State to participate in an open primary and they answered his prayers.

And I have no problem with the four guys we have left in it. I hope they stay in because this is going to turn into an Antietam-like blood bath the moment we pick whoever we pick

I look at it as a stagecoach, Billy, and Mitt Romney's the leading man. Handsome, he's got the reins in his hand and he's driving through the desert.

Then I look at Gingrich. He's the cranky, chunky guy up there, Pappy. You know, the Chill Wills guy? He's got the shotgun. He's picking off Indians.

Then inside, we've got the preacher who's moving him and his wife out to the prairie, Santorum and his wife.

And then we've got Ron Paul. He's the gambler who's telling you don't worry about the Indians as they put an arrow right through his head.

That's what we have got right now. I like the stagecoach. I'd keep all four of them on until later in the year.

O'REILLY: Now, that was a John Ford film with John Wayne, right? Correct?

And then they did a horrible remake and I think you starred in it, didn't you? Or did you have a small part?

MILLER: I was in something called "Bordello of Stagecoach."

O'REILLY: That's right.

Now, if people haven't seen "Stagecoach," the original with John Wayne ...

MILLER: It's a classic.

O'REILLY: ... they should get it.

MILLER: It's absolutely great. It's absolutely classic.

O'REILLY: And another classic was me stamping you down about the playoff game. Roll the tape.


O'REILLY: You're picking Baltimore over New England?

MILLER: Ah, just because I don't know. Ray Lewis and Ed Reed are warriors. They (inaudible) ...

O'REILLY: I'm going to take some of that action there, Miller. Are you ready to go for that on a dinner?

MILLER: Sure, I'll bet a dinner for you.

O'REILLY: All right. Excellent.

MILLER: If you can ever get a free night from taking all your Dick Morris dinners, yeah, I'll buy you a dinner.

O'REILLY: I know. But Morris never pays, I'll make you pay.


O'REILLY: All right, I got a very expensive restaurant picked out, Miller, when you come to town here.

MILLER: Well, listen, Billy, here's my theory on that. I didn't want to say it before the game, but Brady threw six touchdowns against Denver.

Now, Brady and Aaron Rodgers are my favorite players. Brady always likes to advance the ball and move it ahead. He wants to do better each week.

I remember thinking this is like when I was on "Saturday Night Live" and I do a good dress rehearsal at "Weekend Update" and I always sucked on the air.

Conversely, if I didn't have a good dress, I'd get all animated and fearful and I'd do great on the air.

I thought, Brady, where's he going to go from six touchdowns. It kind of played out that way. But can I tell you this? Out of all the people I met when I was in the NFL for two years, Robert Kraft, by far, the classiest ...

O'REILLY: Very good guy.

MILLER: ... nicest man.

Oh, but, you know, Baltimore almost won. I was just picking the game, not my likes and dislikes.

O'REILLY: Pay me dinner and I have got this big expensive place.

MILLER: I would love to take you, Billy. Good chat with you at dinner.

O'REILLY: All right, now, do you have an early Super Bowl pick?

MILLER: Well, I don't know. You've got to go back to the Patriots. I just feel like Brady's staged now. It all revolves around Brady to me and I think now he's had a bad game. I think he's opened up to have a good game.

O'REILLY: Yeah, I'm afraid of Brady, too. I mean, I'm obviously a New Yorker. I've got to go with the Giants, but, if Brady's hot, it's over. That's for sure.

MILLER: But I love Eli, too. It's a tough pick. Tom Coughlin's a good man. I remember him from "Monday Night." But I guess I'd have to go with Mr. Kraft.

O'REILLY: Well, we'll talk again next week and we'll get it all firmed up.

Content and Programming Copyright 2012 Fox News Network, Inc. Copyright 2012 Roll Call, Inc. All materials herein are protected by United States copyright law and may not be reproduced, distributed, transmitted, displayed, published or broadcast without the prior written permission of Roll Call. You may not alter or remove any trademark, copyright or other notice from copies of the content.