This is a partial transcript from "Hannity & Colmes," September 18, 2006, that has been edited for clarity.
ALAN COLMES, CO-HOST: In her new book, "The Proper Care and Feeding of Marriage", set to be released this January, Dr. Laura Schlessinger reportedly refers to American women as unpaid whores and "sluttatious hussies". The comments set off a firestorm of controversy after they were reported last week, but tonight in a “Hannity & Colmes” exclusive, Dr. Laura is ready to set the record straight.
Joining us now, radio talk show host Dr. Laura Schlessinger.
Dr. Laura, welcome back to “Hannity & Colmes”.
DR. LAURA SCHLESSINGER, AUTHOR, "THE PROPER CARE AND FEEDING OF MARRIAGE": Hi, Alan.
COLMES: Are American women sluts and hussies?
SCHLESSINGER: Yes, that's just hilarious. You know, in "The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands" it was a firestorm because I was suggesting that women actually have sex with their husbands.
Now I'm doing "The Proper Care and Feeding of Marriage", and now the feminists are coming after me, because I'm saying they shouldn't be having sex with every Tom, Dick and Harry. You know, you can't please people.
COLMES: Who are the "unpaid whores" you referred to? I haven't seen the book; it's not out yet. What's the context for that?
SCHLESSINGER: Right. So I'm wondering where people are getting — this is stuff I've talked about on my show. Men see women as sex objects when they behave like unpaid whores. You know, barely knowing, hooking up, shacking up, no commitments.
You know, I think — I am the epitome of what a feminist ought to be, because I have utmost respect for what is women and what is female and what is feminine. And to keep our feminine dignity and modesty is so important when we want a real man to idolize us, cherish us, take care of us. That's what both of you would teach your daughters.
COLMES: Is it your view, though, that most women fall into the "sluttatious" category? I never heard that word before, or the slut category. Is that — do most women fall in that category?
SCHLESSINGER: I don't think so, and I never said they did.
COLMES: "Page Six"...
SCHLESSINGER: I guess it got people angry at me which is the intent.
COLMES: "Page Six" of the New York Post also said — and I want to give you a chance to respond to this — you talked about kindness and sensitivity to show to other families. They attacked you for being estranged from your now late mother and currently your sister.
You've come under a lot of attack for that kind of stuff. I want to give you a chance to respond to those charges.
SCHLESSINGER: Well, you know, I've responded to these so many times. It's — I think more the truth is they live for their personal attacks to eliminate the messenger, because they're unhappy with the message. Because I have discussed this innumerable times.
My mother abandoned both of her daughters. I had to go through the sudden death almost of my husband, that burning of my house, having a baby with no mom there to help me. That wasn't my choice. That wasn't my decision. Neither was it my sister's when it happened to her.
And I would have loved to have a mummy. But you know, you have two chances in this life to have a parent-child relationship. One as a kid. And you can't count on who you get as your mom and dad.
But the second one you can count on yourself to be a good mother, and that's something, A, that I have committed myself to being with my now — almost 21-year-old boy. And the campaign I am, and mission and my whole career to take care of children everywhere.
COLMES: What happened with your sister?
SCHLESSINGER: You know what? My sister is not a public figure. And she wants her privacy, and I'm respecting that.
COLMES: Do you think you have a special responsibility as someone who gives advice for a living? Do you see yourself as a role model? And do you have to ward off this — be careful about what you say, what you do and how you are perceived more than other people?
SCHLESSINGER: You know, I don't worry that much, frankly, personally about how somebody doesn't like how I worded something or they don't like my attitude about something. I'm not in a popularity contest.
I'm in the place I'm in, trying the best I can, to have men and women have beautiful, loving marital relationships and wonderful families and be the best people they can be. And I have like, three, minutes maybe between commercials to help somebody on my radio show do that.
So I don't worry too much about how somebody might perceive how I sound. I worry more about making sure that I can get by their defenses and give them something they can use.
HANNITY: Dr. Laura, welcome back. I like your straightforward, from the heart honesty, truth telling and a little — we all deserve a little bat on the head every once in a while, especially when there's some truth behind it. And that's how I view what you're doing.
I think these other things are just cheap shots against you because they don't like what you say.
Particularly, I want to talk about...
SCHLESSINGER: Yes. For some reason these folks don't like to discuss my issues with me. They only personally attack me. It's kind of obvious and it's a little boring.
HANNITY: When you were 21 years old — I mean, I wasn't a saint — maybe I was. I wasn't a saint at 19. Let me ask this, because what you're really describing here, when you use the term "unpaid whores", or "sluttatious hussies". And that females when they...
SCHLESSINGER: Wait a minute. I never said that other thing. But it's cute phrase, and I think I'll use it.
HANNITY: OK. OK, all right. But when they say, for example, that "females when they dress like babes, perform oral sex and intercourse without having been fed dinner", we — there are too many people that are far too promiscuous and do not value themselves. Isn't that the essence of what you're saying here?
SCHLESSINGER: When I was in college in the '60s and being a feminist meant at the time that we wanted respect for what we could do and who we are.
And here we are, all these years later, with guys hardly respecting us at all. And if a woman wants to be treated with — and cherished -- she's got to behave like a lady.
And you see "Desperate Housewives". You see how a lot of mothers these days are dressing their little daughters, and you both were young males. You remember what you thought about girls when you could see up there and down there. Come on, give me a break here. Anybody who thinks that's the way to raise a girl to feel good about herself.--
I've been on the air for 31 years, and I have never met a woman who felt better about herself, better about life, love, and marriage and self-esteem who was "loose" and had a lot of sex with a lot of guys and shacked up. It doesn't make a woman feel better about herself.
HANNITY: I think it actually hurts them in a lot of different ways. I think the...
SCHLESSINGER: Of course.
HANNITY: I think psychology and psychiatry forgets that there's a soulful aspect of the human experience. That we have a spiritual side. I think all of these things sort of have been cast aside. But you point out one thing, the differences between men and women. Beyond the obvious, but you say men see women as sex objects and there is a difference.
SCHLESSINGER: Wait a minute. Sean, wait a minute. Hang on.
SCHLESSINGER: When they behave like sex objects, men see them as sex objects. Men will see us the way we present ourselves.
HANNITY: But wait a minute...
SCHLESSINGER: I told a lady who called me today, who was — she's hard pressed to find a guy who wants to actually date and court for a wife, because they're mostly dating so they can get some. And I said on the first date explain, " am not an unpaid whore. If you want to pay for one, go for it."
HANNITY: All right.
SCHLESSINGER: I'm the kind of a woman a man will cherish as a wife and the mother of his children.
HANNITY: But that's my point. You're saying that they need to value themselves. But is it not true, based on that statement, when men see women that way or view them as an object, isn't it true that women sense today that that's what men want and I've got to, if I want to find a good guy, that that's the way I've got to act.
And I've got to dress more provocatively, and I've got to get the tan. And I've got to bleach the hair and do the nails because they're trying to get a guy. Isn't that true? And they think those of the things they have to do that are necessary.
SCHLESSINGER: You see, one of the things you said — one of the things you said a nice guy, a real man. Real men want a real lady. A guy will do anything available to him. My mother and father taught me that at a very young age.
My mother said one time "a guy's not going to throw many females out of bed if they're willing to be there." That's the reality of male sexuality.
But a male — a man does not want to marry that. He wants to marry somebody he can put on a pedestal, be in awe of, respect and admire. And my upcoming book in January, "The Proper Care and Feeding of Marriages", is a lovely book about the healthy, beautiful ballet between a man and a woman when they do it right.
COLMES: We're going to pick it up in — interesting place to pick it up — in just a moment with Dr. Laura Schlessinger.
HANNITY: As we continue now our exclusive interview with syndicated radio talk show host, our good friend, Dr. Laura, is back.
I want to get into this issue, because, you know, everything you say is controversial in the minds of a lot of people. But this got a lot of — yes, this created a lot of controversy.
When you talk about women who complain about the sex drive of their husbands and your answer is, "As if being desired were some kind of intrusion or insult. Get over yourselves. Get under your men." And then you say things I can't read. Explain.
SCHLESSINGER: Oh, yes you can. There's nothing rated "X".
HANNITY: I cannot. I don't have the courage to read it. Not because I can't. I don't have the courage.
SCHLESSINGER: Yes, but you like what I wrote, right?
HANNITY: I think it's — you know what? I have friends of mine. Let me be blunt here. Their wives never want to have sex with them, and I think that is insane. I don't understand it.
SCHLESSINGER: Well, I think there are a number of factors going into that, and they really start out with feminism. And I'm a recovered feminist. I've been there. I know the mindset. I understand.
And that is that, truly, women have been so brainwashed growing up in this culture since the feminist movement, which had wisdom in its beginning and then got totally off track, that men are oppressors and you have to work and just be frayed at the seams because you're working. You're coming home. You have the kid. You have all these responsibilities. You're tired. You're annoyed.
Anything he asks is an intrusion. And women sacrifice this beauty, this gift from God, their sensuality and their sexuality. I always tell them why would you turn down a good orgasm, my dear?
HANNITY: See, you put — my face is turning red.
SCHLESSINGER: I know I make you blush, Sean.
COLMES: How true.
HANNITY: But you pointed out something, too. And you said when their husbands are older and their kids are raised and the husbands no longer want anything to do with you, you're really telling them they have themselves to blame for the way they've treated their husbands. You're saying they're not nurturing, they're not loving, they're not kind. And it's rejection, isn't it?
SCHLESSINGER: Yes. It's rejection and abuse. And that's what I covered in "The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands". And I got letters from, probably friends of Alan's, because they were female CEO's of companies...
COLMES: And they're all my friends.
SCHLESSINGER: Yes and just thanking me, because now they're happy.
You see the problem, feminism is about being angry and always feeling — and being paranoid and always feeling hurt by something. And what I did is I gave them back the beauty and the joy of the husband-wife relationship and how each other becomes an oasis for the beauty of being alive. That kind of intimacy, being safe with that person...
COLMES: Dr. Laura...
SCHLESSINGER: ...and being able to be bare in heart and soul and body with that person.
COLMES: We only have a moment left. You're on the show tonight because you wanted to clear the air on some things and you've been attacked. And one of the attacks has been that you give tough advice but you haven't always lived up to the things you tell other people do. It's legendary what those things are.
HANNITY: All right. We've got about 30 seconds.
COLMES: Is that a fair criticism of you?
SCHLESSINGER: No, of course not. Hypocrisy means that I'm doing stupid things today but espousing something different.
But 30 years ago I did stupid things. I admit; I regret. I'm embarrassed, but I was a feminist and those were the values. And today I have something else to teach, but I understand where a lot of the people are coming from, because I was there. And now I'm not.
HANNITY: You know something? That's a great answer, and we all learn from stupid things we've done. We've all done stupid things.
Dr. Laura, we love having you on. Thanks for being with us. We look forward to seeing you when the book comes out in January.
SCHLESSINGER: Thank you.
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