I've asked it before, and I'll ask it again: Would you take dietary advice from me?
Of course not and nor would I offer it.
Yet some in Washington have no problem throwing stones from a very big glass house.
Take this clarion call among many in our nation's capitol to protect our financial capital.
"It's time we police your books," they say. "It's time we do your job because you clearly can't do it yourself."
Just one question: who the hell are you to judge?
You have no problem year in and year out churning out budgets that are a sham. Now you're going to judge corporate budgets?
You have no problem losing tens of billions of dollars in pork barrel programs that have no real value. Now you're going to add some value to corporate books?
And you have no problem sticking it to taxpayers for largesse that benefits your own coiffures. Now you're going to judge the largesse of CEOs you claim are benefiting their coiffures?
Four words: I don't think so.
Believe me, much of corporate America needs fixing, but you're not the ones to fix it. It galls me to see you guys grabbing microphones in DC, as if you're newborn market Mother Theresas.
Well, just like I'm no Jack LaLanne, you're no stock Saint Francis of Assisi. You fudge. You lie. You make up numbers. And you take money.
You say you're the only ones who can fix the mess we're in. Well, first take a fix at your image in the mirror.
I'd sooner believe you if you said we're going to attack our own chicanery and corporate America's. But no, you choose to conveniently forget your own sins in a publicity-grabbing move to highlight others.
Well, the spreadsheet has hit the fan. What amazes me is you're the ones throwing it. I wouldn't lecture you on eating your vegetables. Don't try lecturing us on swallowing your crap.
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