If you want to learn how to do something well, ask someone who’s already doing it well. That goes for everything from building a tree house to, you guessed it, sex.
So, this week I'd like to bring you some words from the wise. I put the call out to anyone and everyone I know — What’s the key to great sex? Here are the top seven tips.
From a Health and Wellness Coach: Andy L.
If you really want to have great sex, you have to have the mindset that you want to unleash the sex kitten in your partner. You want to put yourself into her body and imagine what you would like someone to do to you.
From a PR Pro: Justin Y.
Read Cosmopolitan magazine. Maybe even read it with your partner. Some of the tips and tricks in the magazine have had a tremendous impact on our intimacy and arousal, and our ability to please each other in ways we never have before. Plus, when you do something new to please your partner and she asks you how you learned to do it, she will be impressed when you tell her you read it in Cosmo!
From a fitness fanatic at Crossfitgenius.com: Tony Y.
Not only is it sexier to "do it" with a fit person, it's more fun, too. Strength and stamina improve performance and satisfaction for both parties. Sex lasts longer and the orgasms are more intense. You've heard about those couples who go all night; this is why! Join them.
From a relationship expert: Noah S.
Breathe her in. My girlfriend goes absolutely bananas when I do this: Have her lie on her stomach. Put your face and lips less than an inch away from her bare back. Breathe in, breathe out. Let her feel your breath on her skin. Slowly explore her body just by breathing her in. Gently caress her with your lips and your breath. By the time she turns over, she'll have melted.
From the President and CEO of Beingaman.com: Dr. Dennis N.
Guys work very differently from girls sexually. Guys are more like light switches that go directly from off to on. Women are more like pots of water on the stove that slowly build up to a boil. That’s why it’s so important to take some time to build things up. Starting at the front door [when you pick a woman up for a date] with the right kiss: bold, passionate and hinting at more is like turning on the gas—as long as the flame doesn’t go out. You also need to keep these little “suggestions” going throughout the date—right up to the point of hitting the bedroom. Taking a little initiative here will mean she’s ready even before the first shoe hits the ground.
From a Sex and Relationship contributor for eHow.com: Ian Kerner
Turn her off to turn her on: studies show that the key to getting a woman turned on and to the heights of orgasmic bliss is a deep sense of relaxation and a lack of anxiety. The parts of the female brain responsible for processing fear, anxiety and emotion slow down the more aroused a woman becomes, producing a trance-like state at orgasm. From washing the dishes and engaging in a little "choreplay," to giving a woman a full-body massage, help stimulate her biggest sex organ: her mind.
From a Social Media Consultant: Martin H.
Tip for co-habitating couples—do not have a TV in your bedroom. A comedian once defined middle age as the point where you have to decide between having sex and watching Law & Order (for us it was South Park). Television and other distractions should be banished from the bedroom.If a certain sexual position is of interest to one or both members of a couple in theory, but it doesn’t seem quite right in practice, try adjusting things using pillows. A slight change in angle might make all the difference. Trying things out on furniture of varying heights can also result in some pleasant surprises.
Jenny Block is a freelance writer based in Dallas. She is the author of "Open: Love, Sex, and Life in an Open Marriage." Her work appears in "One Big Happy Family," edited by Rebecca Walker and "It’s a Girl: Women Writers on Raising Daughters," edited by Andrea Buchanan. Visit her Web site at www.jennyonthepage.com.