Did you ever see someone do or say something so illogical you physically want shake some sense into them? That feeling came to mind a few times while watching “The Hills” this week, but even a good shaking might not help any of these people.

Audrina Patridge, the popular pushover and new “Hills” hussy is now over her apparent dry spell and drenched in dudes that want to date her. Having already determined that JustinBobby’s too mean, and Collin’s too nice, you’d think Goldilocks would find that Cory Bohan, the good looking, edgy, tattoo-clad Australian BMXer who actually makes eye contact on occasion (which, if you’ve seen Audrina, is easier said than done) is just right. But of course things can’t be that simple.

Just as Audrina invites Cory to join her and her friends on their upcoming trip to Cabo, Frankie Delgado breaks the news that JBob’s one of the “homies” now, and hangs out with them “like everyday” so Brody Jenner went ahead and invited HIM on the Cabo trip. So just like that, Cory’s dis-invited and Audrina’s naked in a pool with Justin as he explains that he’s blatantly going to hook up with other people while they’re away together.

Justin clearly deserves a shake and even good kick in the teeth for just about everything he says to Audrina, and she deserves the same for putting her melons in his face rather than her fist. But the guys were surprisingly more aggravating than either of them.

It’s weird enough that Frankie and Brody befriended Lauren’s former flame Doug Reinhardt and insist on bringing him around everywhere, but now Justin’s part of their "bromance" too? I think it’s time the girls sit the boys down for a little find-your-own-friends-you-desperate-losers chat (also, stop saying “homies,” tools.)

Though I suppose it’s probably pretty easy to embrace new buds when you have Spencer Pratt to compare them too.

Since disowning Brody because he didn’t want to share him with Lauren, Spencer is now ready to ditch girlfriend Heidi Montag because he doesn’t want to share her, or their apartment with her sister. But for all the reasons he’s deserved a beat-down, I can’t say this is one of them.

It’s bad enough that Holly Montag just showed up in L.A.—no place, no job and no prospects for either— and that she seems to sit around Heidi and Spencer's place ALL the time, as well as accompany them to every meal. But despite her claims that crashing with them is a temporary fix, Spencer’s theory that her plan was actually to break him and Heidi up and stay there indefinitely seems to be right on the money.

This couldn’t be more apparent than when Holly can’t seem to understand Heidi’s suggestion that they start looking for a new place for her to live.

“Why?” she asks incredulously.

Maybe because that’s what you were supposed to be doing all along!

So Spencer not only has a tenant who doesn’t pay rent, eats his food and gives him no privacy, but she also is openly trying to sabotage his relationship and get him ejected from his own home. Regardless of whether you think Holly’s plan sounds fantastic, you can’t blame Spencer for wanting her out.

For Heidi’s part it seems she’s finally realizes that their warped version of “Three’s Company” isn’t working, and that her mooch of a sister might be taking advantage of her generosity (cough:::stupidity:::cough).

Now maybe if she starts spending less time making herself look like a drag queen every morning she’ll have more time to realize that she wouldn’t have this problem if she didn’t date a complete jerk who treats her family like dirt. But that is an issue for another day.

For now the issue at hand is where No-job-no-talent-no-friends Holly is going to live. With rumors flying that Audrina’s moving out of Lauren’s guesthouse, it seems like it could be the perfect spot for Holly to keep the coattail train riding.

Then again, if she moves in with Lauren she might not be able to keep Heidi from actually shaking the life out of her.