The "Montauk Monster" is toast.
The unbecoming beast reappeared on Thursday in an Oklahoma kitchen, popping up on a piece of breakfast bread.
An eBay seller is claiming to have toast bearing the likeness of the creature that spurred a frenzy after beachgoers in New York's Hamptons discovered what they described as a stinking carcass that had washed ashore.
The Moore, Okla., seller ekrecords recounts on eBay how it happened during preparations for an antioxident-rich breakfast of pomegranate juice, fresh grapefruit, raisin bran, buttered toast and coffee:
"I was stopped in my tracks the moment I saw the ghostly impression of none other than the unbelievable 'Montauk Monster' laying peacefully in the slightly charred surface of my morning toast. A wave of both horror and wonderment washed over me as I quickly understood what the bystanders that found the actual beast must have felt during those fateful seconds on the beach."
The crispy creature was up to $2.75 and had attracted 14 bidders as of noon on Friday, yet it was not the only "Montauk Monster" item to wash up on eBay.
Other listings included a 99-cent oil-on-canvas portrait of the beast, which had no bids as of Friday afternoon, as well as a "custom-made prop" created from a sculpture and cast from latex. The prop was selling for $48.99 from a seller in Canada and by midday it had 11 bids.
On Thursday the Web site for a movie production crew claimed to have the actual "kidnapped" carcass.
The Web site montauk-monster.com reported Thursday that the crew of "Splinterheads," a movie about carnival life being filmed in Patchogue, N.Y. — not far from where the "monster" reportedly was found — posted the claim and a photo of the carcass on its Web site, splinterheadsmovie.com.
"We have the 'Montauk Monster,'" the site proclaims, along with a photo of the beast.
Curious as the situation may be, some of the questions from prospective eBay buyers seemed even more peculiar.
"Hello, what is the shipping for this etched piece of toast? Will it be hot with butter on it? And does it come with jam?" one inquirer wrote in a question-and-answer section.
But, alas, this interested individual might have better luck at a diner after reading the seller's response: "Shipping is a dollar and it was not etched. This is the way it came outta the toaster as seen in the picture. No butter or jam. Sorry."