What’s it going to take to get her into bed?
Whether he’s just met a gal or has been dating a dame for a while, this is the million-dollar question that looms in the back of nearly every man’s mind when his focus becomes that of pleasure pursuits.
Between his options of playing games, point blank asking her, popping the question or begging her, getting a little bit — or a whole lot — of lovin’ can seem like a truly head-spinning endeavor, that is, unless you know the fine art of seduction.
When you wear a "sexpert" hat like me, men are always bashfully asking you to give them guidance on how to score more with women of interest or those they have been wooing for a while. Thankfully, there are some surefire techniques that will make her weak in the knees and game for intimacy.
All you need to do is brush up on your Casanova routine, create Eros-inducing moments and employ some warm-up seduction moves that would put Romeo to shame.
Do the following:
1. Know how to serve one helluva cocktail.
Every lady loves a yummy drink with a kick, so seduce her with a cocktail à la aphrodisiac (note: I didn’t say get her drunk). The Molotov cocktail is ideal for inducing passion play since it involves the spice saffron, which was used by the Knights of Arabia to seduce women.
Simply serve up dry champagne, such as Blanc de Blancs, with a few toasted saffron seeds nestled at the bottom of her flute glass for some take-me-now results. She’ll be impressed not only with your bartending skills but with the presentation and thought you put into serving it up with style.
2. Practice flower power.
Contrary to popular belief, a bigger bouquet is not necessarily better. The secret to sexual seduction is the simple, single red rose. But you don’t stop there: Add a card you’ve written professing a sweet nothing that will have her own Kama Sutra "lotus petals" in full bloom.
3. Show her what you can do with your hands and know how to cuddle.
As the body’s biggest organ, our skin is ignored all too often. So give her an incredible massage that will only invite more action. In the glow of candlelight, treat her to a rub-down with baby oil.
Pay special attention to her back, shoulders, neck and feet. Give her light kisses and tell her you can’t get enough of her, but then cuddle with her. Non-sexual touch and affection is not only fun and playful but establishes safe touch for hotter rewards.
If a woman feels good with you, she’s going to want more of you — and more touch everywhere. It’s that easy. She will be putty in your hands, trust me.
4. Go beyond the typical dinner date.
Most women are bored to tears with the let’s-do-dinner routine, so give her a date to remember, like hiking, a picnic or rock climbing. Only rule: Just make sure she knows how to dress for the occasion since something like the wrong shoes will get her, understandably, all bent out of shape. You want to blow her mind instead of blow your chances with her, so prep her, but surprise her.
5. Investigate what turns her on.
The more you and your partner know each other, the better your chances for sexual intimacy. This is partly because you’re going to be familiar with what turns her delirious with desire. So keep your eyes and ears open to anything in which your partner takes pleasure.
Sometimes a turn-on turns out to be what you least expect. For example, one friend of mine needs just a little bit of REM to get her going — no, not sleep. The band REM. Lead singer Michael Stipe’s voice totally turns her on, particularly when he sings "Stand." Hey, to each her own, no?
In the Know: The Latest Sex News …
— Penthouse to give back to the community — kind of. Three years after emerging from bankruptcy, Penthouse Media has purchased a social networking site for $500 million. Its acquisition, Adult FriendFinder, has labeled itself the "world’s largest sex and swingers personal community," and is seen as a natural fit for the company by its CEO. Kind of gives "Penthouse Forum" a whole new meaning, eh?
— Indian television to introduce first transgender talk show host. Ramesh Venkatesan, 28, who was born a man but identifies as a woman, is set to become the host of News Corporation’s private television network Star Vijay’s "Yours, Rose."
The irony is that Venkatesan, who still lives with her parents in Chennai, India, must leave her house dressed as a man, only to change into women’s clothes later, given that being transgendered is quite the taboo in India.
— Interactive videos and computer programs may make for the next wave of sex education. According to "Emerging Answers: Research Findings on Programs to Reduce Teen Pregnancy" by Douglas Kirby, sex education videos that are interactive and viewed many times can have a positive impact on the sexual behaviors of teens. Sure beats passing time with the 3D interactive sex game "Virtual Sex Jenna Jameson.
Dr. Yvonne Kristín Fulbright is a sex educator, relationship expert, columnist and founder of Sexuality Source Inc. She is the author of several books including, "Touch Me There! A Hands-On Guide to Your Orgasmic Hot Spots."