Today is the most miserable day of the entire year – January 22nd.
So if you’re feeling a little down, don’t worry about it because the experts say you’re supposed to feel that way. Yes, today is Blue Monday. The official perennial celebration of doom and gloom… Having fun?
For starters, it’s not even a holiday. It is a scientifically calculated date that has been determined to deliver the highest degree of melancholy. Dr. Cliff Arnall of the University of Cardiff in England created the formula to determine this day by considering seven variables: the weather, debt, monthly salary, time since Christmas, time since failed New Year’s resolutions, low motivational levels and the need to take action.
In short, today is the day when the weather sucks, you’re broke, you gave up exercising, eating right, and the thought of you sitting on a Caribbean beach somewhere sipping fruity drinks at sunset with little purple umbrellas in them is about as foreign to your thoughts right now as building an Ark for the great flood. (Note: if the Global Warming folks are correct, this might actually take place and you will have to build a sufficient ark.)
Actually, I suppose one might argue that it is indeed the most depressing day of the year for President George W. Bush – since a poll came out today with his lowest approval rating of his presidency – a whopping 33%!
But for some reason, I’m just not feeling the wretchedness of today. Heck, I’m having a great day! Dr. Despair was correct that the weather is cold, dark and rainy in the case of Washington, DC. He also correctly surmised that I am broke under a mountain of Christmas debt. And I’ll confess to delivering sub par results on my New Year’s resolutions so far… I said SO FAR!
Someone really ought to ask wise Dr. Cliff Arnall, “What is the happiest day of the year?” I’m looking forward to that day even more than today. I wonder if it’ll be called Chartreuse Thursday?
There’s a website dedicated to “Beating” Blue Monday with 10 ways to overcome the depression. One of the suggestions was “Be nice to a stranger.” What a shocker! God forbid we should treat others as we would have them treat us. Although some of the suggestions did catch my attention like “Go to a beach.”
So I’ve decided to put optimism, opportunity, the challenge of a new day with good health and a wonderful family aside and play along just this once and be a good lemming…
Follow my one-step simple solution: Go buy yourself a tropical paradise getaway. You can’t afford it, you don’t deserve it and your out-of-shape, undisciplined body won’t appreciate it… but at least you can say you did something about it in combating this evil day of agony.
Happy Blue Monday!
I can be reached for questions or comments at Griffsnotes@foxnews.com.