Your Grrrs ...
Phoebe C. writes: I love your column and have never written in before, but when I read your last column I had to pipe in too. What's worse is when women have no bathroom etiquette. I work in a small office building in Park City, Utah. Also in the building is a Yoga studio and hair salon. I can't tell you how many times I will go into the bathroom and there is urine all over the toilet seat and since they don't provide toilet seat covers I am always forced to wipe it off. It's one thing when it belongs to you, but completely another when it is someone elses. Even worse, a lot of women here won't flush the toilet if they have only peed in it, I guess they feel they are conserving water and helping to save the planet. Here's a tip ladies, if you want to be your tree huggin' conservational selves at home, more power to ya. But do me a favor, when you're in a public place, flush the dang toilet. The worst thing of all is how many women use the bathroom and then leave without washing their hands. My 7-year-old daughter has better hygiene than these adult women. Her teacher taught her to sing the ABC song while washing her hands to make sure all the germs are gone. Sometimes I get weird looks when I am leaving the bathroom and I open the door using my paper towel, but hey, I can only guess what's on the door handle of that bathroom. Thanks and keep on grrring!
K.C. of Oceanside, Calif.: One Democrat is being attacked for novels that he has written (for an adult audience). Another for a phone call to a "hot fantasy" number from a hotel (a misdial one number away from some congressional office's number). Do Republicans have nothing else to fight with but random, exaggerated smut? Do they honestly have nothing good that they've accomplished they can tote? These are supposed to be the best educated men and women in our country? I call BS. If I wasn't a Democrat before, these ads just might convince me to reconsider. It's sad, sick, and in bad taste. GRRR on personal attack ads, and GRRR on the politicians who think we can't see right through them.
Dean J. on my last column: Amen, but seriously, would you pick up a paper that someone left in a stall?
BMG writes: My wife and I have a favorite restaurant near a park. It is located on the second story of a building, lakeside, with an elevator you have to use to get to the front door. Well, you guessed it ... full of pee odor, which is just what you want before and after a great meal.
Ryan in Austin, Texas: I have your answer to the mystery of whiz on the floor: Once, at an airport, as I was turning to leave the urinal that I carefully chose because it had the least amount of whiz on the floor in front of it, I was enlightened as to how that whiz gets there. I wasn't looking for it but for a flash of a moment, which was long enough, I saw a pot-bellied guy, in front of a urinal, tinkling on the floor. Apparently you can't aim at what you can't see. So there is your answer for how, in a bathroom, whiz gets on the floor. However, my No. 1 Grrr is when I see a guy leave the bathroom bypassing the sink in which I am washing my hands. This is filthy beyond words and because of the public hygiene factor my No. 1 Grrr and why I keep my paper towel to open the bathroom door and find the least used portion of the door handle for others, and if I shake a hand I sanitize my hands at my earliest convenience and I NEVER eat without washing. Now enjoy your lunch.
Zada writes: Oh my God, I can't stop laughing. Rogue urinators? Hahahahahaha!! Once again, they can hear me laughing like a loon from inside the bathroom at work (wiping tears from eyes). I hope you're happy, most of the staff here think I'm nuts. By the way ... my Mama would look people she considered uncouth right in the eye and ask in a sweet voice "What? Were you raised in a barn or something?" I still use that whenever I can.
Paul M. writes: Mike, I hope you never get a chance to grow old. That way you will never suffer from an enlarged prostate, prostate cancer or diabetes. An enlarged prostate causes a need for frequent urination. Diabetes does the same thing. If you get prostate cancer there will be surgery that will affect your ability to control your urination. It might cause you to have to go in some of the most inconvenient times and places. I know I have been through the type 2 diabetes thing and prostate removal. With this you do what you have to do.
There was once an experience before all of this. We were driving to a Dallas Cowboy game as we got near the stadium, I got a bad urge to pee. There was no way to get off the freeway. I held it 'til we got to the parking lot at the stadium. I found there were no facilities in the parking lot. The parking lot was a 15 minute walk from the entrance to the stadium. I had to find a place behind a truck that was fairly private and let go. You can’t always help but make do wherever you are but try to do it decently as possible