Hiding out under a bridge, high on LSD, charging passersby a dollar to cross your path makes you many things.

Stupid? Yes.

Guilty of a brief but undoubtedly humorous sojourn into madness? Most definitely.

An actual bridge troll who can attack off-duty cops with golf clubs when they refuse to pony up the toll money you demand? Not so much.

Robert Hibbs was arrested in a park in Boulder, Colo., after he went medieval on an off-duty deputy who declined to pay him a dollar to cross a bridge, TheDenverChannel.com reports.

Witnesses told police that Hibbs and his buddy, Bradley Boville, were acting as bridge trolls in the park, charging unsuspecting joggers and bikers $1 to cross.

When an off-duty sheriff’s deputy was not amused by the pair’s hallucinogen-fueled shenanigans, Hibbs — as many a bad-tripping, putt-loving troll before him, no doubt — hauled off and whacked the cop with a golf club. The deputy told police he was able to remove the club from the troll and hit him back in self-defense.

Cops arrested both Hibbs and Boville after finding a large marijuana joint rolled in dollar bills at the scene of the troll tolling. Other drugs and paraphernalia turned up in a search of Boville’s apartment.

Thanks to Out There readers Matt "The Squid" S., C. Wiley and Angry Dave.

Nude Dude and Aptly-Named Dog Fight for Right to Sun Buns

CENTRAL ISLIP, N.Y. (AP) — A nude sunbather is suing for the right to bask "au naturel" with his rat terrier, Cheekies, at his side.

The plaintiff, former bodybuilder Mark DelCore, says he needs Cheekies with him because he suffers from post-traumatic stress disorder. He says sunbathing is a balm for a skin condition he developed after exposure to World Trade Center toxins while leaving a lower Manhattan gym.

Those are the arguments DelCore presents in his suit, filed in federal court in Central Islip.

DelCore of New York City favors a "clothing optional" beach on Fire Island, New York. But officials at the Fire Island National Seashore say Cheekies is not welcome.

The park allows only guide dogs on its swimming beaches. DelCore says his dog's healing presence qualifies him as a "service dog."

It's Like Stripping a Superhero of His Themed Skivvies

TAMARAC, Fla. (AP) — Joe Schreiber isn't mayor anymore. But he wants to wear the shirt.

Problem is, city commissioners have agreed to pass a resolution prohibiting former elected officials from using the city seal without permission.

Several weeks ago, Vice Mayor Ed Portner threatened to have Schreiber removed from a city meeting for wearing his red polo shirt emblazoned with the word "mayor" and the city seal, the South Florida Sun-Sentinel reported Tuesday.

"When someone gracefully leaves the office, they should remove the emblem from their clothing," Commissioner Marc Sultanof said.

Schreiber, 83, had been a commissioner for five years and mayor for nine.

He said he would not comply with the resolution until he gets legal advice. He argued that President Clinton doesn't call himself "Former President Clinton."

"It's understood," Schreiber said. "They are trying to stop me from being recognized. I think it's disgraceful. I'm Mayor Joe."

The resolution will also require ex-officials to make their requests to use the city seal in writing "provided that the word 'former' is used in conjunction with their title to signify their current status."

And Now This From the Crime Doesn't Pay Deptartment ...

SYLVESTER, Ga. (AP) — Three people accused of stealing checks in Worth County went to the wrong bank to cash them.

Joyce Powell is a clerk at the Sylvester Banking Company and was at work when a co-worker in the drive-through window told her someone was trying to cash one of her personal checks.

Investigators say the three suspects had just broken into four homes in rural Worth County.

The bank employee stalled the suspects, telling the one presenting the check that he must show some sort of identification. Meanwhile, Powell checked with authorities and learned someone had broken into her house. The suspects became suspicious and left.

But 27-year-old Calvin Barfield had left his driver's license and Social Security card at the bank. It didn't take authorities long to track him to a motel in Albany.

Authorities arrested the three late Monday near the Calhoun County line. They are being held in the Worth County Jail charged with burglary and forgery.

Thanks to Out There reader Chris W.

Nothing Says 'Thinking of You' Like a Car Full of Snakes

ASTORIA, Ore. (AP) — It could've been a prank or the work of Mother Nature — either way, Sherry Hart got a slithery surprise in her car.

Sherry Hart found a pair of garter snakes in the back seat of her car on a recent shopping trip to the grocery store, then found more under a floor mat.

"This lady was freaking out next to her car," says Will Brinkerhoff, 17, an employee at the North Coast Fred Meyer.

Eventually more than 20 of the harmless snakes were found inside the car, some pencil-thin and one the diameter of a quarter and 3 feet long.

Brinkerhoff, another employee and several customers helped clean out the car. One man dumped out his groceries and gave Hart the plastic carrying bags so she could fill them with snakes.

When Warrenton police Officer Jim Gaebel arrived he guessed that one snake must have gotten into the car and had babies. Gaebel later told Hart that in all his years in police work, this was his first snake call.

But Hart believes it was a prank.

"Who did it? We don't know," she said.

But she believes her car was chosen because a window stuck in the open position made it an easy target in the big parking lot.

Thanks to Out There readers Mike D and The Squid.

Compiled by FOXNews.com's Taylor Timmins.

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