A California woman, caught in a strange legal limbo, has been living in a hospital even though she was discharged more than a year ago.

"I've been here more than a year, never had any medication, never had any treatment, never had a fever, have a perfect heart, blood pressure is like a teenager," Sarah Nome, 82, said in a telephone interview from the San Rafael Medical Center (search) north of San Francisco. "It isn't that I'm not ready to go. I just have nowhere to go."

After several leg operations in 2002, Nome was unable to walk or care for herself and moved into the first of several nursing homes.

The last one sent her to the hospital for a psychiatric evaluation, but she was discharged when nothing wrong was found with her.

The problem is that Nome has sued every nursing home she's ever lived in — meaning that none in the area want to take her.

Now Kaiser Permanente (search), which runs the hospital, is suing her for the over $1 million she's racked up in costs.

"We're really not interested in her money," Kaiser attorney Stanley Watson said. "We just want her cooperation."

Watson said hospital officials have tried to find a suitable home for Nome, but Nome and her daughter insist on staying in Marin County.

"I can assure you that we don't plan on having the sheriff come in and physically remove her and put her on the street," Watson said.

Nome's television privileges have been taken away, and she said she spends most of her time reading and looking out the window.

— Thanks to Out There reader Jodi E. The Associated Press contributed to this report.

Man Tries to Break Into Jail, Gets In Anyway

UNION SPRINGS, Ala. (AP) — A man who tried to break in to Bullock County Jail (search) achieved his goal when police arrested him on charges of criminal trespassing and locked him up, authorities said.

Officers found Jimmy Tolliver, 40, hiding behind an air conditioning unit in a secured area around 3 a.m. Feb. 2, police told the Union Springs Herald.

"He had crawled under the fence," said Union Springs Police Chief Jake Wheeler. "We assume he was trying to smuggle something into the jail."

Wheeler said Tolliver told officers he was trying to borrow $5 from an inmate.

Officers searched the area and found a bag of marijuana stuffed in a ventilation duct, the police report stated.

Tolliver was charged with second-degree criminal trespassing and taken to a city holding area. He was later transported to the same county jail to which he had tried to gain entry.

Bullock County District Judge Mike Emfinger charged Tolliver with time served and released him, warning him to "stay away from the jail."

— Thanks to Out There reader Scott S.

Fake Cops Drive Real Cruisers

GULF BREEZE, Fla. (AP) — To slow traffic and deter reckless driving, a Pensacola suburb is putting homemakers, business people and retirees behind the wheel of police cars to serve as decoys.

The volunteers can't write tickets or make arrests, but the program, begun last week with 10 volunteers, lets police increase visibility without expanding the 19-member department.

Gulf Breeze, a city of 6,000, saw a 30 percent increase in crashes during 2003, Police Chief Peter Paulding said. He cited aggressive driving as the leading cause of accidents.

Volunteer Pat Reynolds said the presence of police cars driving at the speed limit slows down lead-footed drivers who hit the brakes when they see a police car.

"It's probably the first time many of them have driven the speed limit through Gulf Breeze," Reynolds said.

The volunteers carry no firearms, but they can radio for a police officer for serious violations, jot down license numbers of traffic offenders and aid crash victims. The volunteers were given eight hours of training, including first aid and the use of radios.

The International Association of Chiefs of Police (search) is looking at the inexpensive program, whose cost is mostly limited to fuel, as a possible national model, Paulding said.

— Thanks to Out There reader Harley W.

Boy Calls 911 Hundreds of Times

ST. LOUIS (AP) — A teenager has been accused of swamping dispatchers with hundreds of bogus 911 calls over a matter of weeks, at times talking of killing responding officers.

The 15-year-old boy was such a nuisance he called in new emergencies at the same address where officers already were standing, St. Louis County police spokesman Mason Keller said.

He finally was tracked down last Sunday after dispatchers got 25 bogus calls within 75 minutes.

The boy was charged with two counts of harassment and one count of making a false police report, all misdemeanors.

"Any time the 911 system is abused, it takes valuable time away from actual emergencies," Keller said.

Keller said the teen used a stolen, deactivated cell phone that could still call 911.

On Sunday night, someone using a cell phone made a bogus report of a man with a knife, then called again while an officer was at the scene. The caller said he could see the officer's car and could kill him, Keller said.

Investigators found the last known owner of the cell phone — a teenager who said it was stolen or lost at school — and compared a list of his classmates to addresses in Black Jack, the St. Louis suburb where most of the 911 calls were received.

The suspect, a classmate of the cell phone's owner, was arrested last Monday after police learned he lived in the neighborhood.

Valentine Candy Packs Powerful Kick

AMARILLO, Texas (AP) — Authorities doubt Cupid had any part in the 9 pounds of heart-shaped candies discovered during a traffic stop.

The candies, found Feb. 7 by Texas Department of Public Safety (search) troopers, tested positive for psilocybin, a psychedelic drug extracted from a mushroom of the same name.

The estimated value of the faux Valentine's Day chocolate was more than $408,000, DPS officials said in a news release.

The troopers found the candy in a plastic bag after stopping a San Francisco man's 2005 Toyota Corolla on Interstate 40 about three miles west of Amarillo.

Craig Allen Moreland, 30, was arrested and taken to the Potter County Detention Center on drug charges, the release said.

Cock-a-Doodle Don't

BERLIN (AP) — A couple in northern Germany terrorized their neighbors by playing sounds of a rooster crowing in the middle of the night, police said last Tuesday.

Sleep-deprived, the neighboring couple reported to police in the town of Wacken three times over the past week, saying the pair in the other half of their semidetached house seemed to have left a rooster in their home while on vacation.

The animal crowed "at an enormous volume" for 20 minutes between 2 a.m. and 4 a.m., the couple told police.

Police entered the home Monday and discovered a recording set on a timer to play daily, with the speaker placed directly against the neighbors' wall.

The 55-year-old man and his 50-year-old wife, still on vacation, were cited for causing bodily harm and disturbing the peace, police said.

Investigators said the motive was unclear because there was no known strife between the neighbors.

Kangaroos Literally Poop Paper

CANBERRA, Australia (AP) — An environmentally friendly paper manufacturer has stumbled upon an unlikely way to put an unwanted natural resource to good use.

The company has created its first batch of paper from marsupial manure.

Landowners around the Tasmania state town of Burnie helped scrape together 55 pounds of kangaroo and wallaby dung for the local business, Creative Paper Tasmania (search), to make the unique paper pulp, manager Joanne Gair said.

"It's a great product for tourists, but it's also something that gets our eco-friendly message home to a lot of people," said Gair, whose paper products contain no wood.

The sand-colored sheets will be embossed with the words "Genuine Kangaroo Poo," she said. Roughly 400 sheets can be made from 55 pounds of the fibrous droppings.

"We've got enough to make our first batch, but if we're going to get into serious production, we're going to need a bit of assistance," she said.

Compiled by FOXNews.com's Paul Wagenseil.

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