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Bank Robber Does Nearly Everything Wrong

How many mistakes can one bank robber make?

Let us count the ways the man who held up the Enterprise Bank (search) in Salley, S.C., on Christmas Eve got things wrong.

One: Disguise yourself. The buffoonish bandit did try to do so, the Augusta (Ga.) Chronicle reports — but he waited until after tellers had let him into a controlled area, placing him in full view of surveillance cameras.

"That's where he put his mask on," Police Chief Brian Epperson told the newspaper. "Smart, huh?"

Two: Use a real mask. Despite the chief's description, it really was just a scarf wrapped around the robber's face.

Three: Make sure the staff doesn't know you. One teller recognized the man as someone she went to high school with.

Four: Try to mean business. Another teller, being asked for cash, thought the man was kidding and said, "I don't have any."

Five: Don't rob a bank on a Friday afternoon. That's prime time for customers to withdraw money and cash checks, leaving the bank short on moolah — especially when it's also Christmas Eve.

Six: Wear gloves. This guy left a nice set of fingerprints on a counter as he jumped over it to grab a bag of cash.

Seven: Don't use a gun, or anything that looks like one. Many banks will give you the cash anyway if you ask nicely — but if you're packing, that's a charge of armed robbery, as this outlaw may soon find out.

Eight: Don't spill most of your ill-gotten gains on the lobby floor on the way out. The bandit managed to get out the door with only $1,232 in cash.

Despite all these errors — as well as a few points deducted for style when he tripped and fell as an angry citizen fired a warning shot in the street — the silly Salley stick-up man must be doing something right.

As of this past Friday, he was still at large.

— Thanks to Out There reader Edmond K.

At Least He's Not a Quitter

LAKE STATION, Ind. (AP) — A 26-year-old man locked his keys in his car while robbing a convenience store across the street from a police station, authorities said.

Dan L. Griggs, of Gary, stole three cartons of cigarettes about 1 a.m. Dec. 23 from a store across the street from the Lake Station (search) police department, and returned to his vehicle to find the doors locked, police Lt. Mike Stills said

The robber told a clerk, who followed him out of the store, that it was just a joke and that he didn't intend to steal the cigarettes. The clerk then called police officers.

Griggs returned to the store, ripped out the telephone cord and demanded money, opening the store's lottery machine to take about $50 and fled again, according to court documents filed Thursday in Lake Superior Court.

Griggs returned to the store again and grabbed a broom, Stills said. Dispatchers then watched from the police station in the city just east of Gary as Griggs used the broom to smash out a vehicle window.

An officer arrived as Griggs was driving away from the store. After a brief chase through snowy streets, Griggs struck an oncoming police cruiser and fled from the car.

He was arrested when he became stuck in a ditch.

"Unfortunately for him, that was the end of the line," Stills said.

Police officers found the money, lottery tickets and three cartons of cigarettes that investigators believe Griggs took from the store, he said.

Griggs was charged with a felony count of robbery and was being held without bond.

— Thanks to Out There readers Jennifer E., Greg M., Blake P. and Harley W.

Franks, Soda Pop and Much, Much More

BALDWIN, N.Y. (AP) — Two Long Island women who sold hot dogs and sodas from a truck were arrested on charges that their menu also featured sexual acts in exchange for money.

Catherina Scalia, 38, and Rose Skorge, 34, were arrested Wednesday afternoon after they "offered and agreed to engage in sexual conduct with others in return for a fee" at their hot dog stand, which was parked at Sunrise Highway (search) and Rockwood Avenue, Nassau County police said in a news release.

Scalia offered to expose her breasts to an undercover officer who was buying a hot dog and Skorge offered him oral sex in exchange for money, Deputy Inspector Rick Capece, commanding officer of the Narcotics/Vice Squad, told Newsday for its Thursday editions. The women also gave the officer a card for a stripper business, Capece said.

Police started watching the truck more than a week ago after receiving a tip, he said.

Scalia and Skorge were charged with prostitution and were released on desk appearance tickets. They were scheduled to return to court on Jan. 10.

A message left at a telephone number listed for Scalia was not immediately returned. There was no listing for a Rose Skorge.

— Thanks to Out There reader Greg M.

So Much Money, So Little Time

BOSTON (AP) — A judge denied a 94-year-old woman's attempt to force the Massachusetts Lottery Commission (search) to pay her entire $5.6 million winnings up front on grounds she otherwise won't live long enough to collect it all.

The ruling means the commission can pay Louise Outing, a retired waitress, in installments over 20 years worth about $200,000 annually after taxes.

"I expected that," Outing said Thursday following the ruling. "I'll make out some kind of way."

Superior Court Justice Barbara A. Dortch-Okara said Outing, of Everett, was not harmed by the commission's disbursement rules because she can obtain the lump sum elsewhere.

Lottery winners are allowed to "assign" their winnings to a state-approved financial company that makes the full payment — but only in return for a percentage of the total winnings.

Outing's lawyer, James Dilday, said that's an option if they decide not to appeal. He maintained the rules give lottery officials discretion to authorize a lump-sum payment.

Outing, who won a Megabucks drawing in September, has seven grandchildren, nine great-grandchildren, and six great-great-grandchildren.

"I'd like to get it and do what I want with it," she said. "I'm not going to live 20 years. I'll be 95 in March."

Lottery Executive Director Joseph Sullivan said all players are held to the same rules, which are printed on the back of Megabucks tickets.

After an initial gross payment of $283,770, Outing would be paid 19 annual gross checks of $280,000. That's about $197,000 after taxes.

Ads Replace Silhouettes of Naked Ladies on Mud Flaps

JACKSON, Wyo. (AP) — A Jackson man has found a niche selling advertising on truck mud flaps, an idea that sprung from many hours driving Wyoming's highways.

"There's not a lot you can do when you're driving," Jeff Heilbrun said, "except look at everything around you."

Heilbrun, who has a marketing background, saw a lot of trucks, with a lot of mud flaps, with a lot of writing.

And so, moving swiftly in the lanes of Interstate 80, FlapMedia (search) was born.

Trucking companies, which typically put company logos or other wording such as "Caution: Wide Turns" on their mud flaps, should welcome the idea, Heilbrun said.

"It's only positive for them," he said.

FlapMedia provides the mud flaps and labor to install them and gives the trucking company a portion of the advertising fees.

In exchange, the company agrees to keep the flaps on for a stipulated time and keep them as clean as possible.

The company also has discretion over what advertising to carry on its fleet.

It's a recipe that appealed to Rob Goats, chief financial officer of Central Refrigerated Service (search) out of Utah.

"It provides a service to us where we have to buy mud flaps regardless," he said. "If someone wants to put their message on there, it's a win-win for us. It's an added source of revenue we wouldn't have."

Heilbrun, 46, saw FlapMedia's pilot project affix Wyoming tourism ads to the back of 300 tractor-trailers for two months.

"People who travel are all over the map demographically," he said. "Our media right now is for the general masses."

"The idea," he said, "is to get the message across."

City Council Obstructed Over Colon Cleansing

LOGAN, Utah (AP) — The fight over a woman's desire to run a colon cleansing (search) service out of her home has gotten down and dirty.

Colette Yates says she has invested two years and roughly $40,000 on her home business, which focuses on removing waste from the large intestine by injecting water into the colon, where it loosens and softens waste.

But while colon hydrotherapy is a licensed procedure in other states, it is considered only a homeopathic method in Utah.

The Providence Planning Commission recently recommended denial of Yates' request for a permit. Commissioners said they wanted to avoid setting a precedent of allowing medically oriented businesses in residential neighborhoods.

Yates said last week that commissioners are wary because they're not familiar with the procedure, though she provided them with detailed videos and literature.

"It's world-renowned, and people are doing it everywhere," she told commissioners, "but it's relatively new to Cache Valley."

But commissioners questioned Yates on how she would safely monitor the water pressure and how she would dispose of waste.

"I haven't heard anything negative about it — and I've been asking — but I think it belongs in a chiropractic office," said Commissioner Kristina Lamborn, who voted to recommend denying the permit. "I feel very strongly about that."

Compiled by FOXNews.com's Paul Wagenseil.

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