It's got to be one of the shortest marriages on record, and probably one of the most violent.

Scott McKie, 23, and Victoria Anderson, 39, wed at the city register's office in Stockport (search), England, in June 2003. Following the ceremony, they met up with friends and family at an upscale pub outside town.

That's where McKie began by toasting the bridesmaids, a court in Manchester, England, was told Dec. 1.

Nothing wrong with that, except that McKie, in top hat and tails, was standing on a table, shouting at the 50 guests and "sozzled on gallons of ale," as one witness said, reports the London Sun.

Anderson stormed in, got him off the table and took him outside.

She bashed him over the head with an ashtray, and he ran back into the pub with blood pouring from his head. He later received seven stitches.

When pub staffers refused to serve him any more alcohol, McKie picked up a hat stand and threw it "like a javelin" at the bar, according to the prosecutor.

Police quickly responded, only to be met by McKie, who told them, "You don't know who you're messing with. I'll [expletive] kill you."

He head-butted one police officer to the floor, then lunged at him with a piece of broken glass, reported the Daily Mirror.

Ninety long minutes after the couple had taken their lifetime vows, the cops finally managed to drag McKie, kicking and screaming, off to jail, where he proceeded to punch another policeman in the eye and smeared his blood over his cell walls.

The briefly happy couple haven't seen each other since. Their honeymoon on the Greek island of Corfu (search) was hastily canceled, and divorce proceedings are going through.

McKie, a manual laborer, pleaded guilty to attempted grievous bodily harm (search), affray and assault. He was sentenced to 60 hours of community service and placed on an 8 a.m.-7 p.m. curfew for three months.

Outside the courthouse, McKie was defiant.

"I'm glad to be rid of that woman," he said of his 16-years-older bride. "I should never have married her in the first place. My wedding day was a nightmare.”

"They had only been together for two or three months before they married," commented McKie's father Ian. "It was a big mistake. We hear she's ripped up all the wedding photos, but we don't want any reminders of that day either."

McKie's lawyer summed up the ordeal: "All concerned were very drunk."

Assault With a Deadly Dental Instrument

HOPE, Ark. (AP) — A Hempstead County prisoner returning from a dentist's appointment Monday morning used a stolen dental pick to commandeer a jail transport vehicle and escape.

Myron Price, 27, put the dentist's tool to the neck of a jailer as he was driving them back to the jail, authorities said. He forced the jailer out of the vehicle and sped away.

Hempstead County deputies also said Price used an ink cartridge from a ballpoint pen to pick the lock on his shackles so he could work the vehicle's pedals.

Price didn't get far, however. He was caught a short time later near Hope.

— Thanks to Out There Suzanne W.

Clean Your Room or We'll Go on Strike

DELTONA, Florida (AP) — Even though the dishes, garbage and dirty laundry were piling up, homeowners Cat and Harlan Barnard were getting no help from their two children.

After begging and pleading with their 17-year-old son and 12-year-old daughter to help out around the house, the Barnards decided they were fed up. So they went on strike — and moved out to the front yard.

"This was our last-ditch effort," Cat Barnard said.

Since Monday morning, the Barnards have lived in a tent in their front yard, going inside the house only to use the restroom or shower. The couple sits on lawn chairs and roasts marshmallows over a hibachi.

Their children were confused on the first day when they came home from school.

"It's extremely inconvenient," said their son, Ben Barnard. "Every time the phone rings, we have to run outside to give it to them."

Whether the couple's actions could be regarded as abandonment depends on how much guidance the parents are still providing and "if the children are suffering as a result," said Carrie Hoeppner, a spokeswoman with the Department of Children & Families in Orange County.

But Cat Barnard says the strike may already be paying dividends. She noted that her daughter washed her own clothes for the first time on Tuesday.

"This is war," Cat Barnard said. "I love my babies, but I don't like what they're doing."

Car, Kitten, Tractor, Alcohol

MARISSA, Ill. (AP) — A southern Illinois man led a sheriff's deputy on a bizarre tractor chase that ended with his arrest on a felony charge of driving under the influence of alcohol.

The case began when St. Clair County Deputy Scott Toth was called to investigate a blue 1996 Chevrolet that was in a ditch. Authorities said the car had severe front-end damage but no driver.

Toth left the vehicle to try to locate the car's owner, then returned to find a man on a tractor trying to pull the car from the ditch, according to St. Clair County Sheriff's Master Sgt. Steve Johnson.

The man, 39-year-old Randall C. Jenkins of Marissa, denied he had been driving the car but began driving away in the tractor as Toth ran his name through a computer and found out his license was revoked, Johnson said.

Jenkins drove the tractor to a neighbor's home with Toth in pursuit, then ran and hid behind a grain bin, Johnson said. Toth arrested him for driving under the influence.

During his search of Jenkins, Toth also found an injured kitten in his shirt pocket. Jenkins said the kitten had been inside the Chevrolet and was injured when the car hit a power pole, and he put it in his pocket to keep it warm, Johnson said. Johnson did not know if the kitten survived.

"It's certainly a weird case," Johnson said.

Jenkins has been convicted of driving on a revoked or suspended driver's license six times and for driving under the influence of alcohol four times.

He also was charged with criminal trespass to a vehicle in the Nov. 24 incident because authorities said he did not have permission from his roommate, the car's owner, to drive the car.

Good Cop Gone Lame

JOHNSTOWN, Pa. (AP) — A former police officer was jailed on charges including impersonating a public servant after he allegedly used a badge to try to get a "police discount" at a motel.

That's how Richland Township police summed up the strange set of events involving the former officer, Ryan A. McBreen, 28, of Somerset, and a companion.

McBreen is a former part-time officer in Stonycreek Township, but he was also once an officer with the state Capitol Police in Harrisburg — and it's a badge from that department which started the chain of events, police said.

Police say McBreen and Ryan D. Baumgardner, 28, of Conemaugh Township, went to the Richland Motel just outside Johnstown on Nov. 27 and asked for the discount while McBreen allegedly flashed a Capitol Police badge.

The motel clerk rented the room, but also called the police because McBreen didn't offer a photo ID with the badge; the clerk remembered McBreen and Baumgardner previously renting and "trashing" a room; and, finally, clerk questioned the discount request.

"I want to make this clear," said Richland Detective Kevin Lehman, "we never even heard of a police discount."

When police arrived they arrested McBreen and Baumgardner for impersonating police, then patted them down and found crack cocaine (search) on McBreen and prescription drugs on Baumgardner, police said.

A search of their room and vehicle yielded drug paraphernalia and what police called a "large amount" of cocaine and "substantial sums of money."

Both were arrested for obvious reasons, with an additional charge of theft for McBreen, because police say he was also carrying his Stonycreek badge that he failed to turn in when he resigned there in July 2002.

The number of the Capitol police badge he alleged flashed belongs to another officer who has since retired, police said.

Job Quitters, Take Heart

MIAMI (AP) — A nurse's aide who quit her job to take a cruise hit the jackpot.

Carol Baird won a $321,694 slot machine jackpot aboard a Carnival Cruise Lines (search) ship off the U.S. Virgin Islands.

Baird, 59, quit her job after realizing she had booked her cruise in violation of her company's policy prohibiting personal vacation time seven days before or after a holiday.

"When I booked the cruise, I didn't look at the calendar," Baird said.

So she decided to quit her job at a nursing home after 17 years.

Baird said she was playing the ship's MegaCash machine, featuring a fleet-wide progressive jackpot, with her husband gaming next to her. Initially she didn't realize she had struck the bonanza.

"Now I'm glad I did [quit]," she said.

Baird said she was going to get the jackpot payout in installments over six years "so I don't have to work."

Compiled by FOXNews.com's Paul Wagenseil.

Got a good "Out There" story in your hometown? We'd like to know about it. Send an e-mail, with a Web link (we need to authenticate these things), to outthere@foxnews.com.